Your Thought On Age Difference?

245

Replies

  • Sh1tsRainbows
    Sh1tsRainbows Posts: 1,227 Member
    i think it has to do with maturity level.. i was 25 and my bf was 18..both immature and still partying..now im 36 and hes...awe you can do the math LOL...but i think were on the same level..

    so im guessing maturity wise your 31 yr old ex is at the same maturity level as the 18 yr old...:drinker:
  • seehawkmomma
    seehawkmomma Posts: 815
    Maybe its just the way I was raised, but I've had several guys who are 19-22 age who have shown interest in me and immediately I had to be like "Awww No thanks". For me I couldnt even picture being with a guy who was 21. Thats so young. I have a kid, full time job, responsiblities, I feel like dating them I would take away years of stupid things they are supposed to experience.

    Not only that, but I just shut down I automaticly think "Okay dude just wants sex" or "We would have nothing in common"

    Even at 17 a dude who looked at me who was over 20 I'd be flattered of course but would be inimated by someone who my mother would have killed.

    I know that It can work. But I think at 17 or 18 its just so young. I was really young at 19 when I met him and he was 25.
  • Learning2LuvLindsay
    Learning2LuvLindsay Posts: 1,142 Member
    I had to read the 1st line like 3x LOL I thought he is dating his own second teenager :laugh:



    Haha! I thought the same thing!
  • boomboom011
    boomboom011 Posts: 1,459
    my husband is 50. Im 37. Been married for 10 years.
  • ummlovelovesyou
    ummlovelovesyou Posts: 1,024 Member
    Age ain't nothin' but a number.
  • SinIsIn
    SinIsIn Posts: 1,865 Member
    I was 18, he was 29.
  • seehawkmomma
    seehawkmomma Posts: 815
    I was 18, he was 29.


    just curious how did that work out for you?
  • yippeeskippee
    yippeeskippee Posts: 32
    Age difference really isn't that big of a deal, except for the 17 year old thing. That's not even legal age I don't think, except in other countries. But 18 and beyond, it can be a healthy relationship, I don't see anything weird.

    I myself am attracted to older men - older as in late 30s - 40s. Of course I'm 21 so it's not as much of a difference as what OP stated.

    Like ummlovelovesy said - "Age ain't nothin' but a number."
  • jmxxiiii
    jmxxiiii Posts: 231 Member
    He's dating younger girls because they are matched at the emotional maturity level...

    I was 19 when I met my husband, he was 27, we've been together for 5 years, married for 4 years in April.
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    The OP's age difference seems like a lot, just because they seem like in different places. If you added twenty years on the girl, it probably wouldn't be bad. It's not even the age, it's where you are in life that affects it.
  • Famzav8
    Famzav8 Posts: 97 Member
    When I was 18, I started dating a 25 year old. Our conversations went something like this:

    Me: I just graduated high school
    Him : I have a mortgage

    We had nothing in common other than we had great sexual chemistry together. Once we both realized that that was all we had in common, we ended it. I mean, you can't base a real relationship on sex alone.

    My husband is almost 23, I am going on 28. We first met when he was 17. I had no clue he was so young until I had already developed a head over heels crush on him. His friends made of fun me: calling me Mrs. Robinson. We've been together now for 5 years, married for 4 months.

    I think things really depend on the person, level of maturity, etc.

    I love your "conversation" hahhahahah I was laughing so hard.....
  • ppg_rocks
    ppg_rocks Posts: 2
    I stay within three years older or younger than me. usually older. I'm a teen and i think it would be weird to date a 30yr old. yuck :P.
  • ogosun
    ogosun Posts: 175 Member
    Its all about "money"... he is probably paying for them and buying them things....it won't last... it never does with such a HUGE age difference....It always about "MONEY"....... heck i wont even be with a guy that doesn't have money to spend on me mind you he has to be the same age or younger(with money).... LOL....
  • jfluchere
    jfluchere Posts: 346 Member
    men can be pigs.
    gross.
  • ek724q
    ek724q Posts: 95 Member
    Well I was married to my ex husband and he was 28. For some odd reason he decided to start a relationship with our 15 year old babysitter. When I found out I got my 2 girls and left. I came back to Texas as soon as I could. He kept me from coming to Oklahoma. I found out this summer why. He decided that after I left he would move to OKC and be with the 15 year old babysitter. Before we divorce he had her pregnant she was 16. and 5 months after the divorce even though by law he had to wait 6 months they married. She had a baby boy 3 days before my daughter's 3rd birthday. We have not seen or heard from him since Dec 27th 2009. I now know why. Her mother did not think anything of it. She did blame me for what they were doing at first and I had no clue it was going on. When I did find out I moved, separated and then divorced the man.

    I am now single and have been ever since. Not sure how to learn to love again or trust again. I want to but not having any luck. :) Now I let my biggest issue out that I have been dealing with. Men are just not cool sometimes.

    And again I was 17 when I met my daughter's dad and he was 28, but we did not start a relationship till I was 18 and out of high school. LOL.

    But to me 15 is against the law and wrong. Plus that girl knew he was married and he knew he was married. UGH! I will leave this alone now.
  • brittanyjeanxo
    brittanyjeanxo Posts: 1,831 Member
    I feel like if someone is, say, 17 dating a 30 year old, that 30 y.o. cant find anyone at their level of maturity so they have to go down. The 17 year old is too naiive to understand that it just seems creepy and they might be getting taken advantage of. The biggest range ive dated was 20 when I was 17 (my now fiance) and that is not much of a difference. I feel like age is just a number, as long as no one is so young that theyre being taken advantage of.
  • ogosun
    ogosun Posts: 175 Member
    MONEY MONEY MONEY..... THAT IS WHAT ITS ALL ABOUT.... ..nothing is for free.. .think about it..... :laugh: :laugh:
  • kimoRUN
    kimoRUN Posts: 325 Member
    Okay, So my daughters father who is 31 is now dating his second teenager. His first one was last year and she was 17 he was 30 at the time. Now at 31 he is dating an 18yr old. I have said nothing to him, but I find it a wee bit odd that a man of his age cant find someone his own age.

    But on the same hand my cousin is 26 and dating a man who is 58.

    Again I find this odd, but now curious....whats the youngest/oldest person you've dated and how did that work out?

    31? Dating a 17 yr old? An 18 yr old? That would get him shot in my home.

    *cosign*
  • Hummmingbird
    Hummmingbird Posts: 337 Member
    what does a 31 have in common with an 18 year old girl??? Now I know that sometimes it can work, but most/many it doesnt...
  • snookumss
    snookumss Posts: 1,451 Member
    I had to read the 1st line like 3x LOL I thought he is dating his own second teenager :laugh:


    ME TOO! Actually, I am 21 and dating a 32yo. I have been with him since 18, and knew him at 16. (odd, I know) but we had been good friends while we were both with other people and we've been together for a good long time now.
  • LadyKatie2010
    LadyKatie2010 Posts: 115
    I was married to someone 19 years older...It ended in divorce. I really dont think it was the difference in age that was the problem though. Age can be just a number. But when you are on the verge of statutory rape or child molestation, EWWWW.

    yeah. 30 year old man with a 17 year old girl? not cool. 31 year old w/ an 18 year old? still not cool.


    thats just wrong on so many levels.


    (and thats coming from a girl who prefers older to around my age!)
  • cynlee1626
    cynlee1626 Posts: 23
    Me too!
    13972728.png
    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter
  • skierxjes
    skierxjes Posts: 926 Member
    When I was 18, I dated a 33 year old. Great guy, but the age difference broke us up because we only shared a few mutual friends and I was limited as to the things I could tag along to do.
  • snookumss
    snookumss Posts: 1,451 Member
    Its all about "money"... he is probably paying for them and buying them things....it won't last... it never does with such a HUGE age difference....It always about "MONEY"....... heck i wont even be with a guy that doesn't have money to spend on me mind you he has to be the same age or younger(with money).... LOL....


    ITS NOT ALWAYS ABOUT MONEY. Believe me, I know, my boyfriend lost his job at the time I got with him and even then he was just an assistant manager at a Pizza Hut. Not quite rolling in the dough, if you know what I mean.
  • cynlee1626
    cynlee1626 Posts: 23
    When I was 21 I dated a 42 year old man. He was a wonderful date / companion. We had nice dinners and went to all the Arkansas Razorback Basketball games. I did get tired of comments like, "You brought your daughter with you tonight?" or "We really like your dad. He's a great guy." Then I saw his 12 and 13 year old daughters. I looked like their sister. I decided it best to end it.
    13972728.png
    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter
  • spottedlee
    spottedlee Posts: 372
    My husband and I were 12 years apart,, I was 24 when I married him. I met him when I was 22, and he was 34. At first, I wasn't sure how mom would react,,boy, she had a cow! In time, she adored him and approved our marriage. We were happily married and we saw no age issue at all.

    Now my younger daughter is married to a guy 13 years her senior. She was worried about how I felt so asked me,, I told her,, "I don't see it as a problem, after all, your dad was 12 years older than me",,,, My daughter is sooooooooooo happy with her husband. She's 26, he is 39.

    I know I used past tense in here, but I lost my sweetheart to cancer a while ago and I still miss him.

    To me,, age don't matter BUT,,, if it comes to 30 dating a 18,.. I think something is wrong here.... BUT,, wait a few years, then it's cool.
  • SiouxPrincess
    SiouxPrincess Posts: 35 Member
    I think when you are still under 18 it is wrong because you are technically not an adult. I am ok with it once they are adults, you can do whatever you want with whomever you want. I don't think the age differences are bad it all comes down to maturity levels.

    I met my husband when I was 27 and he was 48. I didn't know how old he was when we first met but it really didn't matter to me how old he was, it was about the person that he was. We have been married almost 5 years and together 6 and have 2 beautiful kids together. My family has accepted him in my life and in their lives but his family practically disowned him. He has a daughter that is 3 years younger than me and she doesn't like me or our relationship. So he doesn't see his family at all.

    We are perfectly happy together and it works for us. I think it really comes down to the people involved. And that as long as you are an adult people can say what they want but it really is no ones business who you are with.
  • trekkiebeth
    trekkiebeth Posts: 172
    I'm 25 and my husband is 40, so he's 15 years older than me. It's by far the most wonderful and healthiest relationship I've ever had. He's the kindest, most loyal and honest guy I know. He's stuck by me through very stressful times due to a medical condition I have. We have a ton in common and get along very well. We sometimes have heated discussions, but we never have bad fights because we're both very reasonable, amiable people. The age difference hasn't been a problem for us at all.

    That said, an older man definitely should not be dating someone who is under 18, and I think that it would make things less complicated and socially awkward if the younger person was at least 21.
  • Ocarina
    Ocarina Posts: 1,550 Member
    I'm completely against a huge age difference for myself. I really feel like I have to be with someone my age because I want to share as much life as possible with them. Someone older then me will have parents that will be SUPER old and no fun to hang out with possibly... Plus this person would have more baggage and progressed later on in life whether they want to be or not. And all the annoying reactions you would get from being affiliated with such an old/young person. Either they are your "dad/mom" and you are the same age as the kids or you are a perv because you are dating a "child". No fun to be in that situation. With all that extra stress it doesn't help that it seems like the probability of relationship success dwindles the farther apart a person goes in age. I am married to someone 3 and a 1/2 years my senior and it feels pretty far apart sometimes. I can't imagine 10 years or more.
  • runningfromzombies
    runningfromzombies Posts: 386 Member
    It's only weird if one of the parties involved is younger than eighteen (jail bait).

    That being said, sometimes it works. I'm 20, have always been called incredibly mature for my age, and recently dated a 30-year-old. We got along swell for a while, and the reason that we parted had nothing to do with the age difference. It really depends on the people in question, I think. It can totally work if the younger person is more mature for their age, or if the older person is less mature (though I wouldn't call that second situation ideal).
This discussion has been closed.

Categories