My ex left me because I'm fat. :(
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OK, I believe he didn't leave you because you're fat...he left you because he got scared. I see by your ticker that you have made astounding progress, so ask yourself why he would wait til now to leave. He is probably a very insecure "@#$ hole" who needed to put you down in order for himself to look big!! He has managed to transfer all this crap onto your shoulders for about long enough. I know it's hard, but pick yourself up, dust your pretty little (yes, little) self right off, and achieve the rest of your goal! Not for him...but for you because YOU are worth it, and some day some guy (real man) will come along and show you just how precious you really are!!
I second that....When I went through divorce with my first husband he was seeing other girls and working out with other girls because I didn't give him a challenge when it came to working out. I got angry....I used that anger to workout...It was my motivation and I tell you what I ended up loosing about 40lbs and he tried to come back to me....UH NO lol... I am now happily married to my first love and I am back on here cause I just had another child 9 months ago so its time to loose the rest of the weight.
Good luck hun go get em!!0 -
I believe there must of been more to it! You aren't fat! That can't be his excuse! I say, "to hell with him" and have fun! There is so much more out there!0
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You're better off without him. My best friend wouldn't date me because I "haven't lost enough weight yet" and he was a musclehead. Needless to say, he's no longer my best friend. Angry stage is almost a beautiful thing motivation wise, get back on track to do it for a healthy, beautiful you0
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Trust me this guy just did you a HUGE favor, just send him pics of your progess...:flowerforyou:0
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Hey Guys,
I really just need help getting motivated again. My ex recently broke up with me because according to him I'm fat and it's not attractive. The crazy thing is he left me for a pregnant girl (the kid is not his, this I know for sure).
Anyhow we were together for six long years and I've always been overweight. I've lost over 70 lbs already and still it didn't help our relationship. At the moment it's hard for me to eat. I just feel sad and sort of depressed. I consider myself a strong person all I need is a little push and advice from others to keep going.
I only need 27 more lbs to reach my goal! I don't want to get behind, but it's too hard right now for me.
My starting weight: 225 lbs
Current weight: 152.4 lbs
Goal weight: 125 lbs
She explained that a fat, flabby body was a major turn off, and she could no longer stomach the idea of being intimate.
I was CRUSHED.
I lost the weight, and all is well, but like you, that was a wake-up call.
Being fat is unattractive. That's reality. I am thankful she was honest, and if the shoe was on the other foot, I admit that I could never be attracted to her fat. And if she did not change, I'd leave her high and dry.
I get it.
So, use this as a base to build your new life of health and fitness.
And no matter how fit you ever get, HAVE NOTHING TO DO AGAIN WITH THAT MAN!
Had my wife left, I'd have been sad, then angry, then totally motivated to set and reach my fitness goals.
And once fit, I'd have REPLACED her with somebody younger and better looking.
So too can YOU!
Keep punching - ALL IS POSSIBLE!0 -
OK, I believe he didn't leave you because you're fat...he left you because he got scared. I see by your ticker that you have made astounding progress, so ask yourself why he would wait til now to leave. He is probably a very insecure "@#$ hole" who needed to put you down in order for himself to look big!! He has managed to transfer all this crap onto your shoulders for about long enough. I know it's hard, but pick yourself up, dust your pretty little (yes, little) self right off, and achieve the rest of your goal! Not for him...but for you because YOU are worth it, and some day some guy (real man) will come along and show you just how precious you really are!!
This is soooooo right!! Keep up the great work!!!0 -
If there's one thing I've learnt over the years - if a man criticises something about you as part of the reason for a break-up, it's 100% sure that he's using it as a way to deflect attention from his own pathetic behaviour. While you're so busy worrying about the issue he's just passed to you, you forget to blame the real cause of the situation - him!
No one needs to live their life with a moral coward, be strong, be brave and look for someone who really loves you for who you are, because you sound as if you have a lot going for you - his loss, definitely not yours!0 -
I agree with all of the above. People cheat and look elsewhere because of problems with THEM not because of problems with YOU. It's hard not to take it personally especially when they blame your looks etc. but he is just pushing off his own insecurities to make you think it's your fault. It's not. He doesn't want to take responsibility for his own insecurities. You are a strong woman. Find it in yourself somewhere to push forward and get to that goal weight and then rock that bod with confidence because you are strong and sexy and beautiful!0
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He left you because he's a nob not because you're fat!
Do this for you! And you can do it!0 -
Don't let this ahole define you. You will get over this. Then you will be so glad he is out of your life and you can build positive relationships. Make this phase about you. Find someone, when you are ready, that is a mutual relationship, not one sided. No compromise. Lose weight for you, now. Build a stronger you. Find out what that new you needs out of a relationship and life, and go get it! Life has a way of catching up to people that use other people. Buddha: Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.
So somehow you will learn how to go forward and let this guy crash and burn without you. You deserve more.0 -
Ok. First of all... he left you because he is an @**hole... not because you are fat!!!!
Start getting angry, not sad... Once you get to the angry phase, I swear... you will want to do this to prove him wrong!!!!
I have left the worst marriage imaginable and had him tell me the same thing. Didn't start losing until I realized it wasn't me that was the problem. It was that I had this lifesucking leach on me, keeping me that way.
You can do it... Forget him!
This!!0 -
He lied. Sometimes, they're just not the one! At 152 lbs, you are certainly not FAT in anyon'e book0
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The beck diet is a great book to read for motivation. The idea of the book is to get you to have the right mindset to lose weight and it actually does not have any specific diet plan. It is unfortunate the circumstances that you are in but the focusing on yourself and your goals usually helps to feel better in the long run. Other than that, I would try to take the opportunity to meet new people and try new things. Maybe a new sport that you have always been interested in or set a goal that involves exercise such as a 5k. Motivation can be tough but you have to find things you like to do so that it wont be such a chore.0
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Exactly what I was thinking. He is afraid because he can't feel like he's better than her anymore. Serious issues. Count your blessings, a door closed and girl a WINDOW was flung open.......you will find the right one.........he wasn't it. I have been through the EXACT same thing and it hurts like he@@ but you have a decision to make; make sure you chose YOU!0
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Ok. First of all... he left you because he is an @**hole... not because you are fat!!!!
Start getting angry, not sad... Once you get to the angry phase, I swear... you will want to do this to prove him wrong!!!!
I have left the worst marriage imaginable and had him tell me the same thing. Didn't start losing until I realized it wasn't me that was the problem. It was that I had this lifesucking leach on me, keeping me that way.
You can do it... Forget him!
AND THIS!0 -
Sounds to me like you lost an additional 200+ lbs by 'losing' him!0
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Since I don't know anything about your ex or your former relationship with him I will not comment on it.
I simply want to agree with any above poster that said you should want to be healthy for yourself, not anyone else. That is the best motivation anyone can ever have.
(unless you have children of course... then you should want to be healthy for them too )0 -
Ok. First of all... he left you because he is an @**hole... not because you are fat!!!!
Start getting angry, not sad... Once you get to the angry phase, I swear... you will want to do this to prove him wrong!!!!
I have left the worst marriage imaginable and had him tell me the same thing. Didn't start losing until I realized it wasn't me that was the problem. It was that I had this lifesucking leach on me, keeping me that way.
You can do it... Forget him!
You are so much stronger than you are giving yourself credit for. Nobody likes to feel rejected! And I'm sure many of us can relate to how you are feeling blue. But once you realize and accept that you were not in a loving and supportive relationship anymore.. you'll start to allow yourself to smile and be thankful you got out of it virtually unharmed ... and you'll be available for the one who will come to sweep you off your feet. Focu on making YOU the best you can be. HUGS from MFP supporters0 -
There was probably some other issue that he had and just said you were fat to hurt you. He is an idiot and you don't need him.0
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I totally second that! With my ex, when I lost weight hes like your gonna leave me your gonna leave me im like uh no im not... then he pretty much pushed me to leave him after i lost weight lol... its not healthy to be overweight because your significant other has has self esteem issues...0
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Ok. First of all... he left you because he is an @**hole... not because you are fat!!!!
Start getting angry, not sad... Once you get to the angry phase, I swear... you will want to do this to prove him wrong!!!!
I have left the worst marriage imaginable and had him tell me the same thing. Didn't start losing until I realized it wasn't me that was the problem. It was that I had this lifesucking leach on me, keeping me that way.
You can do it... Forget him!
THIS!! You dont need that *kitten* bag, A-hole! You are better then he will ever be!0 -
he's a loser...good riddance!0
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Ok. First of all... he left you because he is an @**hole... not because you are fat!!!!
Start getting angry, not sad... Once you get to the angry phase, I swear... you will want to do this to prove him wrong!!!!
I have left the worst marriage imaginable and had him tell me the same thing. Didn't start losing until I realized it wasn't me that was the problem. It was that I had this lifesucking leach on me, keeping me that way.
You can do it... Forget him!
I wholeheartedly agree!!0 -
Here's what I say, thanks to Ron White: I may be fat, but ur stupid, and u can't fix stupid.0
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Just think ...... you' ve lost a very unattractive 300lbs all up
Getting rid of this a-hole will be a positive thing and you WILL be ok.
Reach your goal & the next time you see him he'll see what he's missing out on.
I like this way of looking! I hope that there was some good in the last 6 years with this (not very deep or decerning) man- the memory of that is something to keep. Be sad for a little - if you must- but leave the rest behind. Now it is time to move on to something better. You've earned it. Out there, right now, is someone who will love you fat or thin - young or old - happy or sad. It is lucky that you are now free and ready to meet him. It would be fun to be even slimmer and more proud of yourself when you find him - so take courage and stay on track!0 -
Ok. First of all... he left you because he is an @**hole... not because you are fat!!!!
Start getting angry, not sad... Once you get to the angry phase, I swear... you will want to do this to prove him wrong!!!!
I have left the worst marriage imaginable and had him tell me the same thing. Didn't start losing until I realized it wasn't me that was the problem. It was that I had this lifesucking leach on me, keeping me that way.
You can do it... Forget him!
WELL SAID....
I was going to say F Him, he didn't leave you because you're fat! He used your insecurity to BLAME you for him being an A**Hole. or just not being in love with you!!!!! F him...girl...you have too much to go on for. There is someone out there that will love you for you Fat, Skinny, whatever....
Seriously, as hard as it is...DECIDE that you're better off this way, and I BET that if you really give it thought...you know deep inside you are!!! We all KNOW the truth...it's acknowledging it thats hard!!!
Move on...chick, use this as an excuse to diet and exercise and in 6 months, accidentally text him a pic of you looking super hot!!! F that!! I hate men like that!! (and yes, totally petty there I know, but F that!! revenge is always sweet)0 -
I bet it's his kid.....0
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Oh Doll .. like someone else said, it had nothing to do with your weight! Keep moving forward for yourself and your own health. 73 pounds is INCREDIBLE!!!0
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He's an *kitten*. I've been through this. SOME men, in this position, say things that they know will hurt you. You have done an amazing job!! Do not let the words of some dumb F**Ktard ruin your progress!! I lost 52lbs when my husband left our 16 year marriage because I was pissed off. I got happy and gained 20. I've lost 9 and I've plateaued, but I refuse to give up the fight. I lived by this for a while: "When God takes something from your grasp, He is not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better" Trust me......better is out there. 4 years post-divorce. I've found my better!! Hang tough sweetie, he's not worth your tears.0
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HUN! I think he had other reasons that he was leaving...maybe cuz he had some chick besides u all along?? He is a *kitten* and u can move on! someone will love u no matter what!! Yur weight loss is amazing..and u shud be proud of that..kick that *kitten* to the curb for good and believe me someone will find u and love u no matter what!0
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