My ex left me because I'm fat. :(
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Ok. First of all... he left you because he is an @**hole... not because you are fat!!!!
Let me give you a guys perspective. ^This. fyi, I've been married close to 25 years.0 -
Seriously, he's a complete *kitten* and it's a blessing he left! May not seem like it now, but it's true. You definitely deserve waaaay better than him. Now you can find the "right" one. Someone who loves you for you. Stuff like this makes me so mad. I will send prayers your way that any pain you are feeling from this breakup goes away quickly
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Congratulations on the loss; of both! Keep up the good work. Believe in yourself and consider yourself lucky to be rid of person with such minimum substance.0
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YOur ex left you before you could leave him. I bet when you two met you had low self esteem and now its growing and he knew you would see you deserved better. He told you he left you because you were fat was his final way of hurting you for the great accomplishment you made.0
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That has got to be the most shallow, bull****, cowardly thing any man has ever said to a woman. I'm sorry you had to deal with that but you're better off without a *kitten* like that!0
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OK, I believe he didn't leave you because you're fat...he left you because he got scared. I see by your ticker that you have made astounding progress, so ask yourself why he would wait til now to leave. He is probably a very insecure "@#$ hole" who needed to put you down in order for himself to look big!! He has managed to transfer all this crap onto your shoulders for about long enough. I know it's hard, but pick yourself up, dust your pretty little (yes, little) self right off, and achieve the rest of your goal! Not for him...but for you because YOU are worth it, and some day some guy (real man) will come along and show you just how precious you really are!!
Exactly this. ^^^^ Unfortunately he was under your skin and could pick the one thing that would hurt you the most as an excuse. He is a liar. He knew it would feel like a slap in the face. It wasnt' becuase you were to fat, it was because you were too strong and getting stronger and sooner or later you would have realized you deserve soooooo much better.
I know it is not easy, but you can do it. You can get over him move and be all the better for it. I feel bad for his next victim. :ohwell:
Best wishes and we are all here for you ((((hugs)))))0 -
OK, I believe he didn't leave you because you're fat...he left you because he got scared. I see by your ticker that you have made astounding progress, so ask yourself why he would wait til now to leave. He is probably a very insecure "@#$ hole" who needed to put you down in order for himself to look big!! He has managed to transfer all this crap onto your shoulders for about long enough. I know it's hard, but pick yourself up, dust your pretty little (yes, little) self right off, and achieve the rest of your goal! Not for him...but for you because YOU are worth it, and some day some guy (real man) will come along and show you just how precious you really are!!0
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I'm going with Heidi1558--wanker should be used much more in the USA. Made me giggle. And BTW, your ex is a complete buttmunch. What the heck? 150lbs is NOT fat. Good for you for your weight loss journey, and you will find someone who is worth your time. Your ex was obviously not.0
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Hold up!! Men, ugghhh! Seriously, he said that because he knew that was a way to get to you, hurt you. Its something that you have been working on and he knows that. Its just an excuse.......... Girl, you are way better without him. Dont let some idiot make you feel bad about yourself. Reverse it, and keep in mind that you have come so far and will continue to be a stronger woman, WITHOUT THE LOSER.0
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I do not believe that he left you because you were "fat".....that was just the chicken sh--ts way of getting out because he was too immature to handle it like a man. Sounds to me like you are better off without him even though it may not seem it at the time. If he had any compassion or respect for you at all, he would have never spoken to you like that. It is one thing when someone unintentionally hurts your feelings but this idiot probably knows your own personal issues you have had with your weight and used it as a tool to intentionally hurt you. To heck with him and as my mama said to me when I escaped from a three year abusive marriage.........."The best revenge is to look good and live well". You pull your chin up and pat yourself on the back for the amazing accomplishment that you have achieved so far. Just know that one day when he sees you at a mall, or grocery store or drug store (while he is picking up tampons and diapers for his new woman) that he is gonna look at you at think "Damn, what was I thinking"!!!!!!!!!0
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Good riddance. Had a guy do that to me once ... and I was not even oveweight. He was a dyslexic anorexic -- thought everyone else should be scrawny.0
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Ok. First of all... he left you because he is an @**hole... not because you are fat!!!!
Agree totally!!! You are better off without him. You sound like your doing a lot to be happy and healthy and the right guy will come along when the time is right!0 -
You know what? Forget about him. You are losing weight, feeling good about how you look and great things are coming your way and even better men out there who are looking for someone JUST LIKE YOU! You keep on doing what you are doing and don't even give that *kitten* a second thought. Of course you are sad, it is natural to feel that way but look at this as a new beginning to your life. Use that sadness and anger to motivate you towards your goal and when he ever decides to come crawling back to you, you make sure you turn your cute *kitten* around, slap it and tell him to kiss off! You got this sista!!!0
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What a jacka$$! Just let it fuel your fire. I agree with the others. Don't get depressed - get angry and motivated to keep on going. I realize there is a lot of emotional attachment - but apparently he is not the right person for you. Just know there is better guys out there for you
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You are sooo much better off! You are lucky you didn't marry that *kitten*! GRR! My ex was like that too though. He was (is) a wrestler and was extremely fit with abs and everything, constantly talking about food and the gym and made me feel like I had to be fit too! That made me never feel good enough for him with the slightest flab and once he even asked if my shirt was his shirt! cuz i guess it looked big to him (but it was a medium!) whatever. that was 3 years ago and we don't need to ever go back. once we get to our goal weights lets get a guy who will cherish us for who we are on the inside. guys will be guys and if they see something they think is better they'll chase it regardless, it's not our faults0
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I agree with the get mad posts. He didn't leave you because your fat, that is just the excuse he gave you because he knew how to get to you. Put your anger and frustration into eating healthy and getting up off the couch. Get the rest of your weight off and get in shape and be on the search for a good man that will treat you with the respect you deserve.0
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First thing, you've done incredibly well on losing the amount you have & you most certainly are not fat!
Secondly, stay strong & healthy, then you can show him what he's missing out on when you're at your goal weight, whilst he's stuck with a pregnant chick & a kid that isn't his.0 -
Sometimes relationships just run their course and end. You want a guy with staying power, and that wasn't this guy. Now you know and can move on to better things. You have shown great strength losing the weight and you should feel great about yourself! People who have never had to lose weight have no idea what stubborn determination that takes. Now you can choose to thrive and find a relationship that nurtures you. Some day you may cross paths and discover that he is the overweight one
That's what happened to me, anyway, lol. 0 -
So I cant really say anything that hasnt already been said- but I can say this- the guy is a prick. And I would bet his leaving had very little to do with your weight. It was just an excuse- and a hurtful one. And someday this will come back to him. Karma is truly a *****.
I know its little comfort- but he basically just said " Oh hey, my name is Fred and I'm a total prick, I'm going to do you a really big favor now and leave to go mess up someone elses life..." Let him.
Now- the next move is yours. You have the luxury of deciding how this plays out in your life.
Sort of a choose your own adventure if you will...
will you go down the path of beating yourself up and feeling crappy about yourself? Whats the outcome and effect this can have on your life?
OR
Do you high five yourself for losing a rotten part of your life, leaving the door open to a fantastic future for yourself. You have lost a great deal of your own weight- plus the weight of a jack *kitten* perched on your shoulder.
There will be other guys- MANY MANY Other guys- some jerks some great. But trust me- - MANY MANY MANY other guys. Dont sweat this one- be glad he didnt further waste your time. And relish the time when you will run into him, her and someone elses kid... and you will look and feel like a million bucks. I can pretty much promise you he WONT feel like a million bucks..0 -
i am not good with the quote thing, i quoted someone and then didn't get my reply in. However I agree he left cause of his own insecurity. You are moving forward and reaching your goals and it scares him. I know how hard it is but with time you will look back and be like "what was i thinking?" Success is the best revenge. He doesn't deserve you and will find out the grass is not greener and by then you will have fully moved on and be leading the happy and serene life.0
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what an *kitten*!!!! you dont need him in your life. u lost so much already dont let him get you down...
i was dating an *kitten* like that we would go to the mall with a few friends and he would always make jokes that were just mean and very hurtfull. he onces told me that i was to fat to go shopping at this one store and then that i need to grow more boobs to go shopping for bras i would drive his stupid *kitten* to the mall and he would make comments like that to his friends guys are just *kitten* they put you down so they can feel like men even tho there not.
just keep going on your journey for you! i can't believe you lost all that weight all ready just keep thinking about how good the feeling is too lose weight and get your ex off you mind he is not worth the tears or the pain they cause0 -
BTW - I want to be British in my next life. As a New Yorker, I don't think I could pull off calling someone a "wanker" or a "nob" :laugh:0
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I didn't read all the other comments and advice before me, sorry.
Seriously though, you are better off now. 2 bit loser he is. Congratulations on your loss and success, that's wonderful. You didn't do it for him, you did it for you, so be proud of that and continue on to your goal.0 -
It will hurt for a while...and the worst thing is that when you break up - whether you've left someone or have been left - more often than not we start remembering only the good times we had with the ex. Instead of remembering it exactly as it was, we turn them into a love object and hurt more.
Like everyone else said, he's using your weak spot, he knows you worked hard, you showed some amazing will power that's got him feeling insecure. You deserve someone with more depth, keep focused on you. You've done an excellent job, it's not a time to let someone else set you off the tracks. keep going, x0 -
Girl you are gorgeous just the way you are and don't let ANYONE make you think other wise! You are too good for him if he is that vain! You do this weight loss for YOURSELF!!! And hey! when you get to your goal weight you can rub i in his face!! You are doing and EXCELLENT job!!! KEEP IT UP!
NEVER NEVER NEVER GIVE UP!!0 -
He didn't leave you because you are fat (obviously - as you were bigger throughout the course of your relationship) but probably felt threatened and maybe even jealous and decided to go the *kitten* route and tell you that it is becasue of your weight. anyone that loses 70 pounds is not fat to me.
And if he did leave you because you are "fat" then clearly he is not the man for you and the right one will come along who will love you for you, whether that be fat, skinny tall, short, etc.
good luck and keep on doing what you're doing!
At the end of the day, you have to be happy with yourself and the choices you make.0 -
I say good riddance! You don't need someone like that. Keep pushing girl! You are doing FABULOUS! Don't let any man or anyone tell you different!0
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So I cant really say anything that hasnt already been said- but I can say this- the guy is a prick. And I would bet his leaving had very little to do with your weight. It was just an excuse- and a hurtful one. And someday this will come back to him. Karma is truly a *****.
I know its little comfort- but he basically just said " Oh hey, my name is Fred and I'm a total prick, I'm going to do you a really big favor now and leave to go mess up someone elses life..." Let him.
Now- the next move is yours. You have the luxury of deciding how this plays out in your life.
Sort of a choose your own adventure if you will...
will you go down the path of beating yourself up and feeling crappy about yourself? Whats the outcome and effect this can have on your life?
OR
Do you high five yourself for losing a rotten part of your life, leaving the door open to a fantastic future for yourself. You have lost a great deal of your own weight- plus the weight of a jack *kitten* perched on your shoulder.
There will be other guys- MANY MANY Other guys- some jerks some great. But trust me- - MANY MANY MANY other guys. Dont sweat this one- be glad he didnt further waste your time. And relish the time when you will run into him, her and someone elses kid... and you will look and feel like a million bucks. I can pretty much promise you he WONT feel like a million bucks..
Niiiiiice!!!! Love this!!! So freaking true. Great way of looking at it!!!0 -
I believe you've dodged a bullet. What you have accomplished is something to be very proud of. Don't dwell on the emotional sadness this is causing you. Instead think back to all the other bad things he had done in the past and consider the possible ways in which your life will be better without him.
I don't think it matters that he left you for a pregnant girl, it wouldn't matter if he had left you for a skinny or fat girl. I'm sure you'd still feel bad. He left you and before leaving he attacked you emotionally. That's how you should look at; "This man left me after seeing how close I am to reaching my goal and he still has the audacity to call me fat."
Take all the time you would usually spend on him and spend it treating yourself. No one needs a partner who is not supportive or loving of what you want to do and what you have accomplish. Why stay blue?0
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