So confused by a lot of people on here...
runnercheryl
Posts: 1,314 Member
I'm fairly new to MFP, and I KNOW this has probably come up many times before, but I'm SO confused by people on this forum.
As far as I see it, every single one of us is different. I've been doing this for 15 months, I know what works for me, and I'm sure many others can say the same.
Yet, on almost every thread if someone mentions something that might not be 100% healthy, you get people coming in and..."giving their opinion".
I've seen it so many times since I joined under a month ago, and I just don't get it. Can people explain their reasoning?
The latest example that's led me to do this is the 'McDonalds' thread. The person posted asking everyone whether or not they liked McDonalds. A few people talked about how often they had it and what they liked best, and before long people were posting criticism, telling people how disgusting and unhealthy the food is and giving people better alternatives, when they weren't asked for. Fair enough, some people ask for advice and alternatives, but some people are just posting to discuss foods, not to be told what to do.
It's not just in threads. I've had private messages about things I've posted on the forums about the way I eat, and comments on some of my statuses, and I wonder what makes people think they should be giving these suggestions as though the people they're giving them to are stupid and actually want/need this information? I realise I'm ranting, but I'd just like to understand what makes people do that, when people aren't asking for advice? A few of the comments I've received are likely people thinking they're being helpful, but sometimes it seems like people just want to push their way of doing things on everyone else, everywhere they can?
Rant over.
As far as I see it, every single one of us is different. I've been doing this for 15 months, I know what works for me, and I'm sure many others can say the same.
Yet, on almost every thread if someone mentions something that might not be 100% healthy, you get people coming in and..."giving their opinion".
I've seen it so many times since I joined under a month ago, and I just don't get it. Can people explain their reasoning?
The latest example that's led me to do this is the 'McDonalds' thread. The person posted asking everyone whether or not they liked McDonalds. A few people talked about how often they had it and what they liked best, and before long people were posting criticism, telling people how disgusting and unhealthy the food is and giving people better alternatives, when they weren't asked for. Fair enough, some people ask for advice and alternatives, but some people are just posting to discuss foods, not to be told what to do.
It's not just in threads. I've had private messages about things I've posted on the forums about the way I eat, and comments on some of my statuses, and I wonder what makes people think they should be giving these suggestions as though the people they're giving them to are stupid and actually want/need this information? I realise I'm ranting, but I'd just like to understand what makes people do that, when people aren't asking for advice? A few of the comments I've received are likely people thinking they're being helpful, but sometimes it seems like people just want to push their way of doing things on everyone else, everywhere they can?
Rant over.
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Replies
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i totally agree with what you are saying. i find it ALOT on here too..i mean if you wan to eat mc d's, go ahead it's your choice but for one to put it down isn't right. everyone likes different things and does things different and if it works for them great! if they are asking for support and suggestions to fix it, then great but if not then keep it to yourself. if it's just a q's, just answer the q and not put in your 2 cents if you don't agree with it.if you can't answer the q without putting in "your opinion if you don't agree with it" then don't... simple!0
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i agree with both of you its up to eveyone what they eat an aslong as there happy an still loosing weight whats the problem x0
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Unfortunately we have people who jump feet first into weight loss and end up harming themselves in the long run. Yea we run into douche bags on here but 90% of the time its people trying to help.
I often get called "blunt" or "Mean" when on the forums but I can honestly say that the people that I did educate are now losing weight with high calorie diets.
BTW I'll eat anything that fits into my macros and lose weight.
I may gain some water weight due to sodium but screw it! I know it goes away after a day!
sometimes we need to have thicker skin and really read and compare the thoughts and ideas of others.
A lot of it is bull****.
Some of it is true!
Never take advice from someone with 0 weight loss and 1 forum post.
=D0 -
i agree with both of you its up to eveyone what they eat an aslong as there happy an still loosing weight whats the problem x
I agree! !!!0 -
for some its mcdonalds for me its subway.. mmmmmm subway.... extra mayo0
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I think many people on here think they are an expert and their way is the only right way.0
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This is the reason that I made my food diary private a long time ago, and then left the site for a long time. Now I'm back (after regaining what I had lost) but I'm going to be much more careful about what I post and who I'm friends with.0
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Take it all with a grain of salt. Most of them mean well. Some just like to get a reaction. Either way, you know your body and what your needs are. Don't worry about what a bunch of strangers say. Focus on the positive. Now get out there and have a great Saturday!0
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I've posted a lot about my diet and had mixed reviews. Most people just love giving suggestions! People are funny that way, dangle a carrot (puzzle) and everyone jumps on it. I probably come across as preachy sometimes but I don't mean to be rude or make others feel inferior. I completely see where you are coming from! I have had a lot of science classes, but when I took organic chemistry the most profound thing I learned was that - ultimately - everything is broken down into its constituent parts and oftentimes the chemical structure of one food differs only by the presence of a carbon or extra bond. It made me wonder just how bad processing really is. I have heard horror stories of bleaching and adding and, yes, it does sound terrible. But I have also isolated chemicals in a lab and you would be amazed at how much acid or sulfur (nastiness) is involved in obtaining a pure product! The physical properties that give food and "chemicals" their properties are extremely useful and often not as dangerous as many people are led to believe. Aspirin is a great example! It would be toxic in its natural form but the processing makes it useful. Same principle with hormones and enzymes. Everyone has different levels so everyone will use food differently.
I like my meals to be safe. Some chemicals are not good for you, so I'm not dissing natural options, but there is a limit to how far the truth goes on this one. I mean, sugar is natural right?0 -
Just TRY and have a diet coke on here.... go ahead... I DARE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!0
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You can only do what works for you. :drinker:0
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Take it all with a grain of salt. Most of them mean well. Some just like to get a reaction. Either way, you know your body and what your needs are. Don't worry about what a bunch of strangers say. Focus on the positive. Now get out there and have a great Saturday!
Well, I do absolutely agree with this, but I did the first year of my healthy lifestyle on my own - I had that time to figure things out and get on the right track. I guess I just wonder what it'd be like for someone totally new to the experience to come here on MFP and see those kinds of comments before they've had the change to realise it's all about the individual. That's worrying. If I'd have joined MFP at the start of my journey I don't like to think what this forum could have done!0 -
I have noticed this as well and honestly it will turn me off of a discussion thread completely. When people feel the need to start criticizing other posters choices without being asked I just move on to another post. I am here to give/receive support. Not be lectured unnecessarily.0
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I agree that there are too many people that jump on these forums just to criticize. If someone enjoys eating at McDonald's on occasion and it fits into their macros, then go right ahead.
I do think it is necessary to tell people when they are doing something that could be damaging to their health. And, when that happens you get too many people that come in with the "well, if it works for them then leave them alone". I don't agree with that attitude. If it is proven to be dangerous in the long run, then I'm not going to tell someone that it's a good idea.0 -
Yeah, those posts tend to blow up. That's fine...more McDonald's for me...
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I think many people on here think they are an expert and their way is the only right way.
I think people are so eager to convince OTHER people that they know the "good and proper" way because they think that if they can prove they know what they are talking about it will somehow magically morph into personal weight loss.....
I only know what works for me.....
eat healthier not less.... and move more....... and I"M RIGHT DAMMIT :explode:
Diet Coke Dissolves Calories .... proven fact... .ask my cat0 -
THIS^^^^1000%Unfortunately we have people who jump feet first into weight loss and end up harming themselves in the long run. Yea we run into douche bags on here but 90% of the time its people trying to help.
I often get called "blunt" or "Mean" when on the forums but I can honestly say that the people that I did educate are now losing weight with high calorie diets.
BTW I'll eat anything that fits into my macros and lose weight.
I may gain some water weight due to sodium but screw it! I know it goes away after a day!
sometimes we need to have thicker skin and really read and compare the thoughts and ideas of others.
A lot of it is bull****.
Some of it is true!
Never take advice from someone with 0 weight loss and 1 forum post.
=D0 -
I think this is more about people in general than MFP. The Diet Coke comment above reminded me of a time IRL when a very well-intentioned friend went on a good 5 minute rant about how Diet Coke would "sabotage" my diet, ruin my teeth (which it does, but hey), etc. No matter how often I said that it was something I wanted as a part of my diet, she wouldn't relent. People just like to tell you how to diet, *especially* those blessed folks who've never had to!
As has been said, there's lots of great advice on here, and lots of bull. When someone new is posting "OMG I'm eating four carrots a day and not losing", they need to get linked to the good starvation mode threads. When someone says that every once in a while they still want McD's....well, seems like a waste of calories to me, but more power to them if they can budget around it xD0 -
Just TRY and have a diet coke on here.... go ahead... I DARE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you drink Diet Coke you will fall pregnant and DIE.
I'll give advice when it's asked for. If it's a post about food (such as the Maccas one) I won't go in and give my opinion. It drives me up the wall to see all the 'ewww, gross I would never put that in my body' posts. Vast majority of the time it's the people who are just starting their weight loss.0 -
If no one ever spoke up to offer advice or even criticism about things that are unhealthy, how would many of us ever know any better?0
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If no one ever spoke up to offer advice or even criticism about things that are unhealthy, how would many of us ever know any better?
Surely most of these things are obvious, though, and if they're working for them why worry? If eating McDonalds once a week IS affecting someone, they'll come on asking for help. If they simply want to discuss what people choose when they go, I don't see why people come in giving their opinion about how 'McDonalds is poison'.
Nobody goes to McDonalds from the age of about three years onwards convinced it's healthy. Nobody needs people coming in and going 'Ugh...McDs is disgusting...think of all that grease and the chemicals". It's obvious stuff.0 -
Welcome to the human race.
Even the so called "experts" are equally contentious on various issues.
Just play it safe, and do everything I say :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
...but not all that I do0 -
Welcome to the human race.
Even the so called "experts" are equally contentious on various issues.
Just play it safe, and do everything I say :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
...but not all that I do
Hm...only if you don't say tennis is a good activity...
I have terrible co-ordination...think of the bruises!0 -
There are some complete idiots in the forums sometimes that think they know everything about health. It gets easier to ignore.
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I'm fairly new to MFP, and I KNOW this has probably come up many times before, but I'm SO confused by people on this forum.
As far as I see it, every single one of us is different. I've been doing this for 15 months, I know what works for me, and I'm sure many others can say the same.
Yet, on almost every thread if someone mentions something that might not be 100% healthy, you get people coming in and..."giving their opinion".
I've seen it so many times since I joined under a month ago, and I just don't get it. Can people explain their reasoning?
The latest example that's led me to do this is the 'McDonalds' thread. The person posted asking everyone whether or not they liked McDonalds. A few people talked about how often they had it and what they liked best, and before long people were posting criticism, telling people how disgusting and unhealthy the food is and giving people better alternatives, when they weren't asked for. Fair enough, some people ask for advice and alternatives, but some people are just posting to discuss foods, not to be told what to do.
It's not just in threads. I've had private messages about things I've posted on the forums about the way I eat, and comments on some of my statuses, and I wonder what makes people think they should be giving these suggestions as though the people they're giving them to are stupid and actually want/need this information? I realise I'm ranting, but I'd just like to understand what makes people do that, when people aren't asking for advice? A few of the comments I've received are likely people thinking they're being helpful, but sometimes it seems like people just want to push their way of doing things on everyone else, everywhere they can?
Rant over.
I was bought breakfast the other morning, and it was McDonald's. I don't turn down free food. I've had to live off soup and apples, the healthiest alternative, to my income at the time. When food is not abundant, you make do. I just made sure I worked it off, hard. We are only human.0 -
You are so right! we are all here because we need help losing weight or need support.. not to be bashed for what we eat.. constructive criticism is ok but be respectful about it.. but I agree sometimes people can be too judge-mental about certain things. Luckily I haven't had that problem but I am just returning to MFP..I'm fairly new to MFP, and I KNOW this has probably come up many times before, but I'm SO confused by people on this forum.
As far as I see it, every single one of us is different. I've been doing this for 15 months, I know what works for me, and I'm sure many others can say the same.
Yet, on almost every thread if someone mentions something that might not be 100% healthy, you get people coming in and..."giving their opinion".
I've seen it so many times since I joined under a month ago, and I just don't get it. Can people explain their reasoning?
The latest example that's led me to do this is the 'McDonalds' thread. The person posted asking everyone whether or not they liked McDonalds. A few people talked about how often they had it and what they liked best, and before long people were posting criticism, telling people how disgusting and unhealthy the food is and giving people better alternatives, when they weren't asked for. Fair enough, some people ask for advice and alternatives, but some people are just posting to discuss foods, not to be told what to do.
It's not just in threads. I've had private messages about things I've posted on the forums about the way I eat, and comments on some of my statuses, and I wonder what makes people think they should be giving these suggestions as though the people they're giving them to are stupid and actually want/need this information? I realise I'm ranting, but I'd just like to understand what makes people do that, when people aren't asking for advice? A few of the comments I've received are likely people thinking they're being helpful, but sometimes it seems like people just want to push their way of doing things on everyone else, everywhere they can?
Rant over.0 -
You are right about McD - people suddenly become food Nazi's when they get on their diet kicks - lolIf no one ever spoke up to offer advice or even criticism about things that are unhealthy, how would many of us ever know any better?
Surely most of these things are obvious, though, and if they're working for them why worry? If eating McDonalds once a week IS affecting someone, they'll come on asking for help. If they simply want to discuss what people choose when they go, I don't see why people come in giving their opinion about how 'McDonalds is poison'.
Nobody goes to McDonalds from the age of about three years onwards convinced it's healthy. Nobody needs people coming in and going 'Ugh...McDs is disgusting...think of all that grease and the chemicals". It's obvious stuff.
"Thy lady doth protest too much" - best to avoid those to seem so miserable about all the fun things in life.
I am not losing weight to join that gloomy lot of killjoys.0 -
Just TRY and have a diet coke on here.... go ahead... I DARE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hahaha..I prefer diet pepsi!0 -
Just TRY and have a diet coke on here.... go ahead... I DARE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you drink Diet Coke you will fall pregnant and DIE.
I'll give advice when it's asked for. If it's a post about food (such as the Maccas one) I won't go in and give my opinion. It drives me up the wall to see all the 'ewww, gross I would never put that in my body' posts. Vast majority of the time it's the people who are just starting their weight loss.
If I get pregnant kill me0 -
There's a different between a statement and a question , I could say" I hate vegetables" and that's my opinion and does not need any explanation or is seeking for any advice.
And then there's "I hate vegetables , can someone offer me some alternatives?" , I want peoples advice and opinions .
It seems people here sometimes confuse them.0
This discussion has been closed.
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