Big Black Women
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I see valid points in your statement. as a Black sistuh whose family values encouraged me to have this lifestyle, it's funny because it's a double standard. it's sad because when you do take healthy steps, people look at you like you are crazy and even make excuses for bad behavior and it's strange for you to want to eat whole foods! Bottom line is we have to take our journeys in the paths we create and feel are best for us. I wish you well on your journey.0
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I am just going to 'bump' this. I have so much to say about this topic.
Bottomline, it's not about what others think of you, it's what YOU think about yourself. If you don't like what you see in the mirror, then do something about it.
I'm done.
~Chika0 -
This is a great post and I can really relate to it. Good luck with your weight loss journey and you should write a blog!!!!0
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My daily struggle. After losing 18 pounds so far i hear many things like, "why did you lose weight?" or "you looked fine before" well the fact that I was nearing a size 14 and knocking on 200 pounds, no way you can tell me i was fine before. And also, black people are on the top percent of all obesity related diseases and because of this reason. I wish there was a way to reach out to the entire black community and just say "it's okay to be healthy and you can do it!"0
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What you said is certainly true in the St. Louis community.0
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My daily struggle. After losing 18 pounds so far i hear many things like, "why did you lose weight?" or "you looked fine before" well the fact that I was nearing a size 14 and knocking on 200 pounds, no way you can tell me i was fine before. And also, black people are on the top percent of all obesity related diseases and because of this reason. I wish there was a way to reach out to the entire black community and just say "it's okay to be healthy and you can do it!"
I definitely heard the same thing and I wasn't even trying to lose a lot of weight. In college and high school years, your look and figure is ESPECIALLY important. When I talk to my non-black friends they always gush and say that I look really great but when I talk to my black friends they always say you were so "thick" before! When did being fat all over turn into being thick and desirable? The difference in perceptions is crazy to me.
When going grocery shopping and faced with the choice of healthy food or junk food, more often than not they would go for the junk. I just don't get it. Even though we are in our early twenties, don't they realize it will catch up to them eventually? I've seen their overweight parents ---> it just seems like a never ending cycle.0 -
THANK YOU for posting this. As a multiracial predominately black woman, I'm SICK of people asuming that because black women are...well, black...then it's okay for black women to be obese! IT'S NOT!!! YES i love my curves, YES my boyfriend loves my curves... But I want to be fit AND have curves. Curves that aren't there just because I carry so much fat. My thighs curve that way because they're full of muscle from walking, jogging, hiking, not because the magic soul food "blessed" me with it.
And I hate that othe black people are weird about it. My exteneded family is confused about why I'm losing weight, but then want to comment that "I've gotten so heavy" or "girl, you are slim, you need more food anyway *hands me another PLATEFULL of fatback-collards and fried cornbread*" Or being picked on because I only ate one plate of food, and everyone else has had three to six in one sitting.
I'm black. I'm multiracial. I'm female. NONE of that should impact how people view my body or my weight. I admit that bad choices got me to my worst point, but even edging 200, people always said "you look so good!" (code for: well...you dress nicely for your weight.)
*breathes in and out* alright... i think im good now. point is, OP, you are right.0 -
My daily struggle. After losing 18 pounds so far i hear many things like, "why did you lose weight?" or "you looked fine before" well the fact that I was nearing a size 14 and knocking on 200 pounds, no way you can tell me i was fine before. And also, black people are on the top percent of all obesity related diseases and because of this reason. I wish there was a way to reach out to the entire black community and just say "it's okay to be healthy and you can do it!"
I definitely heard the same thing and I wasn't even trying to lose a lot of weight. In college and high school years, your look and figure is ESPECIALLY important. When I talk to my non-black friends they always gush and say that I look really great but when I talk to my black friends they always say you were so "thick" before! When did being fat all over turn into being thick and desirable? The difference in perceptions is crazy to me.
When going grocery shopping and faced with the choice of healthy food or junk food, more often than not they would go for the junk. I just don't get it. Even though we are in our early twenties, don't they realize it will catch up to them eventually? I've seen their overweight parents ---> it just seems like a never ending cycle.
so true! I dont understand the choices either when you have the better (healthier) option right in front of you. My favorite (sarcastic) moment was when i went out to eat with a group of friends. I ordered a turkey sandwich and broccoli. everyone else ordered fried chicken strips with french fries. when my plate came to me everyone said...."ugh whats that"....the never ending cycle continues.0 -
My daily struggle. After losing 18 pounds so far i hear many things like, "why did you lose weight?" or "you looked fine before" well the fact that I was nearing a size 14 and knocking on 200 pounds, no way you can tell me i was fine before. And also, black people are on the top percent of all obesity related diseases and because of this reason. I wish there was a way to reach out to the entire black community and just say "it's okay to be healthy and you can do it!"
I definitely heard the same thing and I wasn't even trying to lose a lot of weight. In college and high school years, your look and figure is ESPECIALLY important. When I talk to my non-black friends they always gush and say that I look really great but when I talk to my black friends they always say you were so "thick" before! When did being fat all over turn into being thick and desirable? The difference in perceptions is crazy to me.
When going grocery shopping and faced with the choice of healthy food or junk food, more often than not they would go for the junk. I just don't get it. Even though we are in our early twenties, don't they realize it will catch up to them eventually? I've seen their overweight parents ---> it just seems like a never ending cycle.
so true! I dont understand the choices either when you have the better (healthier) option right in front of you. My favorite (sarcastic) moment was when i went out to eat with a group of friends. I ordered a turkey sandwich and broccoli. everyone else ordered fried chicken strips with french fries. when my plate came to me everyone said...."ugh whats that"....the never ending cycle continues.
lmao it helps if you know what vegetables look like without it coming from a can. It also helps if you dont consider fries and ketchup("but its made from tomatoes!") as your veggies of the day0 -
yeah, id have to agree with skate on this one...Well, after reading all the different views from a large variety of backgrounds I just have this to say: People it is what it is! You are what you eat, but you can also be what want to be. To quote another MFP member whose name currently slips my mind, "Discipline is the diffrence between what you want now and what you want in the long run."
I was raised in a sourthen home environment where there was biscuits and gravey, lots of foods fried in lard. And sweet tea made with lots of sugar! I decided I was tired of being overweight and feeling like crap! I grew up in the inner city of Toledo, Ohio I went to school with Blacks, Hispanics and whites. It is the individual that choose what they are going to eat. No one forces us to eat unhealthy foods. If we have children it is the PARENT's responsiblity to see that they eat healthy not the schools or society to govern. America is over weight and it is not a Black, Hispanic or any other ethnic back ground issue. It's an American issue! Start manning up and being repsonsible for your own decisions and that of your children. Besides I though this was a site to encourage strength for all people to diet and get the support they need. I see over weigth White people just as much as I see over weight Black and Hispanic people (and if that's not the point, don't bring race into it!).
As for the stores the grocery owner is going to put on the shelves what his customers want to buy! I have asked my store to carry items when I want them and can't find them. Good luck to all who are taking their issue of weight into their own hands and accept it is their responsibility not that of the world to solve. Don't set yourself up for failure by making excuses that put the blame on others.
Down 85 lbs.
she wasn't putting the blame on anyone. she was addressing cultural differences in the standards of beauty and expectations of women. and there ARE different expectations from culture to culture. i honestly think you missed the entire point of this thread with all due respect.0 -
Cultural differences. Please!! Give me a break. I haven't met a black man yet that LIKES a big girl. Curvy maybe but all men have their fetishes whether its big butts, breast, thighs and a flat stomach.
I'm a black women and I be damn if I'm every bigger than a size 4...EVER. My mother is a black women, who wakes up at 5am (like me) to workout everyday. At the age of 58, she runs 5 miles and participates in spin classes regularly.
Whatever makes you sleep at night to feel better about yourself...save it for you.
Lastly, Beyonce is no where near overweight - that proves your delusional. Poor food choices are in EVERY under-served low income community, not just black ones. Have you been to East LA lately or Koreatown in LA? It comes a moment when you need to take accountability for you. Soul Food isn't just a "black" meal, it's served all over the southern states. I know white women who can cook better fried chicken than anyone I ever met. HOWEVER, "YOU" don't have to eat it.
I'm glad to hear you don't want to be a BIG BLACK WOMEN, you shouldn't because its not healthy!!
What "BIG BLACK WOMEN" are being glorified in the media. Monique has never been America's (or Black America's) definition of beautiful. Again, I don't know any men salivating at the thought of Monique undressed. Beautiful Black women covering the pages of magazines and media are:
Rihanna, Iman, Kimora Lee Simmons, Jennifer Hudson (who has lost 80lbs), Kelly Rowland, Gabrielle Union, Ciara, Jessica White, Selita Ebanks and so on and son on. Guess what, they all have something in common. Beautiful, yes but physically fit.
The people who are probably telling you bigger is better are probably bigger themselves. Misery loves company and Ignorance is bliss.0 -
no one is making excuses here. again. i'm more than certain that was not the point of this thread. i have a mother who still runs marathons and gets up at the crack of dawn to go run, and is currently in excellent shape. however, in my family (as a whole, not just the one exception to what we're actually talking about here), we get picked on for being small. could it be misery loves company? sure. why not. however, speaking of mo'nique, and the black community, she definitely wrote a book that was a 'hit' called 'why skinny b**tches are evil' where she basically attacks women for trying to get in shape. and this is a sentiment shared by many women of color. i've had friends give me crap over my lifestyle, as well as watched other friends gain weight because they got sooo much flack for their frame. bottom line is, there IS a cultural difference. there are exceptions to every rule and nothing is absolute of course. but there is a difference in perception. this much is true.0
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I hope I don't offend anyone saying this but I was unaware that black women were pushed to be heavier. I just assumed your culture was more accepting of fuller figures and quite honestly I was a little envious of it. Thank for you for informing me of this misconception. I literally learn something new everyday on this site. Good luck I know you will do well!0
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I hope I don't offend anyone saying this but I was unaware that black women were pushed to be heavier. I just assumed your culture was more accepting of fuller figures and quite honestly I was a little envious of it. Thank for you for informing me of this misconception. I literally learn something new everyday on this site. Good luck I know you will do well!
Not so much "pushed" to be heavier as picked on for being smaller or picked on for not being "the right sort of big". In the south (where my family is from...i dont consider myself a "southern sistah"...HATE that term...), people are BIG as an AVERAGE. When you don't fit the average, or you want to change the average, people think you're an idiot. "Why change when you weren't as big as whats her name down the block?" "Skinny people are uppity." Or the wonderful phrase EVERYONE loves "skinny b*tch." You dont even have to be skinny. Just smaller than the average.
And I don't believe it's just culture, but location. And class status. I knew one girl who's parents lived in the EXTREMELY upper part of society? She HAD to stay thin. For some reason "thin" equals "rich and beautiful" in some places. If she gained weight at all, people wouldn't associate with her.
Or further south, where another girl i knew simply CAN'T gain weight. she naturally stays at 95 pounds for some reason. And people constantly pick at her for being tiny and call her a b*itch and they theink she thinks she's better than everybody. Not to mention she has lighter skin, which makes a whole lot of STUPID trouble for her on top of that.
But that last point is a whole other topic. It's not JUST culture. It's also WHERE you live and the people who live there that shape the general right and wrong body image of that place. Unfortunately.0 -
this is something i've struggled with as well, particularly coming from a mixed background (black dad, white mom). but i think i get what you're saying about the food thing in particular - i live in a very "black" city and that's definitely what i see everywhere. but at home in the 'burbs, we have vegan and healthy restaurants everywhere. it's a conundrum.0
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i just want to say i totally agree with you! there is a definite double standard! being a white woman if my back side looked like beyonce i'd be called fat. and i live basically in downtown toledo, oh and the corner store's around here barley have bottled water and if they do it's $2+ yet i can buy a gallon of kool-aide for $1? none of them have any healthy snacks, pretzels is as good as your going to get there. but i go to a suburban area where my granny lives and they have fresh fruit in the carry outs. sugar free juice, all natural tea's... basically all i saying is i know what you mean.0
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What "BIG BLACK WOMEN" are being glorified in the media. Monique has never been America's (or Black America's) definition of beautiful. Again, I don't know any men salivating at the thought of Monique undressed. Beautiful Black women covering the pages of magazines and media are:
Rihanna, Iman, Kimora Lee Simmons, Jennifer Hudson (who has lost 80lbs), Kelly Rowland, Gabrielle Union, Ciara, Jessica White, Selita Ebanks and so on and son on. Guess what, they all have something in common. Beautiful, yes but physically fit.
i can't name the name of the magazine off the top of my head but whilst in wal-mart today i saw a magazine with the words "big IS beautiful" across the top and a rather large black woman on the front... FYI0 -
I too am a black women and being healthy doesn't have a color. I am also from the South and being "curvy/heavy" has never been encouraged in my up bringing nor in the community in which I live, however being healthy has. And yes I do find it offensive to stereotype the black community, defining differences by financial status and beauty. All women are beautiful, regardless of color, cultural background or financial status, for beauty comes from within.0
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Love the post!!!0
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I don't think there's anything wrong with BMI at all. Sure, it may classify SOME athletic people as being overweight, but when used for the population as a whole, it's extremely accurate.
For the record, no medical tests are perfect. None. But that doesn't mean they aren't useful.0 -
I too am a black women and being healthy doesn't have a color. I am also from the South and being "curvy/heavy" has never been encouraged in my up bringing nor in the community in which I live, however being healthy has. And yes I do find it offensive to stereotype the black community, defining differences by financial status and beauty. All women are beautiful, regardless of color, cultural background or financial status, for beauty comes from within.
I have to say, I disagree with you. Living here in New Orleans, obesity is extremely socially acceptable and promoted in our community. Shocking how big so many AA women become down here.0 -
haha and its way easier to find cheaper clothing that looks nice at a size medium than it is for a 3xl.I have a question... Which is harder; finding healthy food choices or finding clothes that fit and look nice on you?0 -
Young Lady...!
Good luck! Keep doing what you are doing despite what our community is "saying"... That attitude is one of the biggest reasons behind why our people are leading the categories of diabetes, heart attacks, high blood pressure, strokes and etc...
Be Healthy! Sista!
A supportive Black Man...
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This is what ny senior research proposal was on. I wrote a 20 page paper and presented the topic for 30 minutes in front of the department. There are so many factors. It's sad but its the society we will live. It's not right0
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I don't think there's anything wrong with BMI at all. Sure, it may classify SOME athletic people as being overweight, but when used for the population as a whole, it's extremely accurate.
For the record, no medical tests are perfect. None. But that doesn't mean they aren't useful.
Here's some BMI for you:
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I am not black, but I am big. I live in central Canada, in a fairly nice neighborhood, and have neighbors of black, white, and every other colour in between. It doesn`t matter what colour you are, where you live, or what you do for a living....there is cheap, junk food around every corner, and it seems next to every school. I joined mfp to fight that and start living my own life on my own terms, and keep my son healthy. It has been a slow journey, but one I plan to keep on with.
Good luck with your journey!0 -
stop hatein'
Beyonce is NOT overweight.0 -
I agree 100%! Being at a healthy weight should be a goal for everyone. Also, curvy does not equal overweight!!!!!! You can be curvy and a healthy weight! I am curvy, but in a healthy weight range. I wish people in our society would stop using those words interchangeably. When I think curvy, I think of Marilyn Monroe or Jennifer Lopez.0
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Curves are beautiful and as a black woman I embrace mine like you. However, there is a bit of excess "poundage" surrounding my abdominal area that has proven to be a health concern in regards to diabetes. I am a black woman with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome - a hormonal disorder that causes the body to fight itself. A huge symptom is weight gain (and difficult weight loss), insulin resistance, infertility and a lot of other reproductive and endocrine abnormalities. I am 33 years old and tired of being tired and allowing me to let this disorder within my body rule me. I have learned a few basic tips on how to help myself b/c there isn't a cure and it's just a matter of me putting those tips in place to better my health. I don't want to be a skinny minnie; I don't think it would look well or becoming for me. However I do want to be healthier. And if slight modifications and reduction in my weight can be achieved - although will be difficult - I am going to take the challenge and do it. Just need the support because this isn't easy.0
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The majority of America is fat...Blacks and Latinos are both a minority...so....who's the other percentage?0
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