Bridesmaids

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AMaro215
AMaro215 Posts: 78 Member
in Chit-Chat
I have heard different opinions from my relatives so I wanted to get your opinion. When you have/have had your wedding are you having your bridesmaids/maid of honor buy their own dress and shoes or are you paying for them? I don't even have my dress yet but I have one in mind along with the bridesmaids dresses. The bridesmaid dresses are $150. I was thinking if I do go with this particular one to pitch in $80-$100 for each dress??? I was in my cousins wedding a few years ago and she had us all pay $100 for our dress and $50 for the shoes....Let me know what you think because I am unsure what to do.Thanks
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Replies

  • RDalton84
    RDalton84 Posts: 207
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    My bridesmaids paid for their dresses and my groomsmen paid for their tuxedos. I did pay for one of my friends because she had lost her job and didn't have the money and I wanted her in my wedding so it was worth it to me
  • ChevyChick88
    ChevyChick88 Posts: 356 Member
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    In any wedding I have been in or know of someone else being in, the girls have paid for their dresses, shoes, and accessories. For my wedding, the girls are paying for their dresses (which I let them pick out) and shoes. I am paying for their hair and jewlery for their gifts. Just in my experience, this is the most common thing.... but, also in my experience, my friends and family do not have unlimited budgets. I would love to be able to pay for my girls dresses and shoes. If I had the means to do so, I would. Most people understand that when you ask them to be in your wedding, it is a little bit of a pricy thing. If you have the means and want to pay for part of their dress, do it. I am sure they would appreciate it!
  • MdmAcolyte
    MdmAcolyte Posts: 382 Member
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    Yeah, Im with what Chevy said... Same boat, different wedding. They are buying their dresses, shoes, etc. They are my best friends, and I would do the same for them. =)
  • AmyLRed
    AmyLRed Posts: 894 Member
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    i bought all of my own each time i was a bridesmaid, though sometimes the bride kicked in for hair or jewelry, etc. It would be nice if you wanted to pay a portion of their dresses, but i assume they expect to pay for their own.
  • My1985Freckles
    My1985Freckles Posts: 1,039 Member
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    My Bridesmaids paid for their dresses. When I was a bridesmaid I paid for my dress.... THIS is the norm in this day and age. If you are getting advice from your parents/older relatives, the advice is outdated.
  • holiday99
    holiday99 Posts: 9
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    :cry: always a bridesmaid, never a bride
  • Bentley2718
    Bentley2718 Posts: 1,690 Member
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    When I was asked to be a bridesmaid everyone paid for their own dresses/shoes. The friend did offer to pay for my dress, etc. because I was in grad school at the time and she knew I didn't have much money--but I was the exception. I ended up not being in the wedding, but for other reasons (no, we didn't get in a fight or anything, my life was just really stressful during that period).

    Personally, I had a tiny, informal wedding, so it wasn't an issue. I would have felt weird asking my friends to spend money to buy something to be in my wedding--but that's probably my hang-up.
  • kerriBB37
    kerriBB37 Posts: 967 Member
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    My wedding is this fall and I am paying for the girls dresses, hair and makeup. We are making jewelry and they are responsible for their own silver shoes (any style.) The dresses are $129. I have been in about 6 weddings and no one has every paid for my dress (I've paid anywhere from $175-$350 for a bmaid dress).. I just thought it'd be nice to do this for my girls, I don't think it's normal wedding protocal though.. If you want to, go ahead! If they are able to pitch it, great!
  • candj2009
    candj2009 Posts: 36 Member
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    Mine bought their own dresses and shoes, (groomsmen paid their tux rental) and when I was recently a bridesmaid, I paid for my own dress, shoes, and jewelry. Now, if the wedding is cancelled, you should offer to pay them back for the dress and shoes.
  • klacoille
    klacoille Posts: 53
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    I've been a bridesmaid 4 times and bought my everything each time. Dress, shoes, hair etc. I guess it depends on your budget. Just keep in mind that if you are having them pay for them, that you need to be aware of everyone's budget and be ok if they have to back out because they can't afford it.
  • holiday99
    holiday99 Posts: 9
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    I have heard different opinions from my relatives so I wanted to get your opinion. When you have/have had your wedding are you having your bridesmaids/maid of honor buy their own dress and shoes or are you paying for them? I don't even have my dress yet but I have one in mind along with the bridesmaids dresses. The bridesmaid dresses are $150. I was thinking if I do go with this particular one to pitch in $80-$100 for each dress??? I was in my cousins wedding a few years ago and she had us all pay $100 for our dress and $50 for the shoes....Let me know what you think because I am unsure what to do.Thanks

    @ my sister's wedding, my sister bought all of her bridesmaid's dresses, including ours (at about $120 ea dress). @ my bro's wedding, he didnt pay anything for anyone.. he's a cheap-o lawyer!
  • lambeas
    lambeas Posts: 229 Member
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    I disagree... I know " traditionally" it was a bridesmaids obligation to buy their own dresses, but with economic times being kind of tough, I think it is unfair to ask your girls to spend hundreds on a dress they will likely not wear again!

    I am getting married in June and I think if the bride is selecting the dress and the ladies do not get a choice, the bride should pay. If you as the bride are giving your girls the option to select their own, well then they can pay.

    I paid for the dresses as my request for them to look a certain way. They will pay for their own shoes, hair and makeup for the day.

    Just my opinion and it worked for me!
  • ShannaB83185
    ShannaB83185 Posts: 441 Member
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    I am getting married in 2 years and unfouratnetly we are on an extremley tight budget. As much as I want the big beautiful fairytale like wedding it's most likely not going to happen. I plan on having 4 bridemaids and I am going to try and do everything in my power to pay for their dresses and shoes. For me though I plan on getting dresses for them that are around the $50 end. I don't even plan on spending more than a couple hundred on my own dress. I know a girl who expected her bridesmaids to pay $250 and that was just for a dress! I think some people need to be considerate to others financial situations and I feel because I am asking the girls to be in my wedding I should pay for their things. They are doing me a favor not me doing them a favor. think your prices are reasonable though for your bridesmaids so if you can finanically and want to pay for their items then go for it.
  • dvarrassi12
    dvarrassi12 Posts: 66
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    My bridesmaids paid for their dresses, but had 100% say in which one they got. I will be paying for their hair and jewelry as a gift. The only wedding I've been in, I had to pay for everything so just pitching in a little for something is a nice gesture. Definitely not expected though.
  • crazycat80
    crazycat80 Posts: 121 Member
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    I've purchased my own dress, made my dress, and had people pay for them. Sometimes I feel like the girl from 27 Dresses. I've been in a few weddings... Anyway, when discussing the costs with the bridesmaids, I suggest you be totally upfront about the cost BEFORE they officially accept being a bridesmaid. And if most of them seem like they aren't okay with the cost, then think about trying to find a middle ground everyone can reach and share the cost.
  • rsdgirl
    rsdgirl Posts: 246 Member
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    i have paid for all 3 of mine, wouldnt change it. its an honor to be asked, in my opinion
  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
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    It's normal for the bridesmaids to pay for their dresses, but there's absolutely nothing wrong with you pitching in.
  • vzucco
    vzucco Posts: 229
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    I think it sort of depends on their financial situation. Some of my bridesmaids came from out of state to be in my wedding and paid for a hotel room, so I had them all just wear their favorite little black dress. I got them all matching earrings and pins as gifts. They really loved having the pressure off when it came to money and they all looked absolutely gorgeous. Their dresses all weirdly went together, it was kismet. But I had a very low-key wedding obviously.

    I think as long as you're not asking them for something that's beyond their means, it would be fine.
  • angiemartin78
    angiemartin78 Posts: 475 Member
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    I bought my bridesmaids dresses and they gave me SOME money for them. Every wedding I've ever been in, I've bought my own dress.
  • Stephie_J
    Stephie_J Posts: 260 Member
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    I have always had my dress and shoes etc brought for me as a bridesmaid, I have never known a bridesmaid have to pay for their own dress but think ours were about £50-£60 each last time so not too bad.

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