Do people even look at diaries before they comment?

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  • AZackery
    AZackery Posts: 2,035 Member
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    I don't diet, nor do I log my foods. A food diary has never been my thing. I have heard about food diaries, way before MFP was created. I don't even log my exercise on here, but I do log my exercise somewhere else.

    I want everyone to be healthy, but I don't check people's diary out to see if they are eating healthy. Their version of healthy may be different than my version of healthy and I believe in eating anything that I want, as long as my doctor doesn't tell me that I can't have something, due to a health problem. I believe in following the food pyramid, moderation and portion control. I don't believe in depriving myself of anything. If I want a chocolate candy bar, I will have it and not feel guilty or let anyone else make me feel guilty.

    I don't see anything wrong with MFP stating that a person has eaten below the calories they have set for people. MFP has set me higher than the calories I aim to eat daily and that's 1500 calories a day. So, yes, if I was to log my food, I would be under in calories a lot. I have checked people on my friend's list diary, when I have seen that they were under their calories and they were still in the healthy calorie range. A person doesn't have to eat the amount of food that MFP has set for them. The lowest healthy calorie number is 1200. Some people eat below this, because they have an eating disorder. They don't need people beating them over the head. They need people to pray for them. One day, their eyes will be open and they will see that they need to eat more. Right now, their bodies can't take 1200 or more. If they are truly here to get help, then they will not fight. If they aren't here to get help, they will fight. Baby steps is the key.

    I love to keep my eyes on myself.
  • CallmeSbo
    CallmeSbo Posts: 611 Member
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    BUT if someone is regularly netting very low, even apparently successfully, with regular weight loss, I'll comment that I think cals that low are unhealthy.

    Unless you're asked, it's probably best to either mind your own business or delete them as a friend.

    Unsolicited advice is never a good thing.
    This. If your opinion is not asked for, then mind your own business.
  • msqdpie
    msqdpie Posts: 92 Member
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    i will often comment without looking because i really don't think it's any of my business what people are eating. I am here to lift up and not put down. Each person's struggle is their own and i don't like being judgmental i myself am not doing a certain "diet" i am watching portions and eating more fruit and veggies. I think it's more realistic and healthier but if someone is drinking shakes or whatever that's their business.


    I agree with this, I think it is Far more Importaint to be Part of a Good Support System! I always Leave Comments but I Hardly Ever View.
  • 1a1a
    1a1a Posts: 761 Member
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    It just feels like my comments are drowned out in a sea of "well dones".

    Absolutely I wish mfp would change the display to "X is within Y% of their target net cals today". Would be a much better celebration.

    This would be amazing :-)
  • WhittRak
    WhittRak Posts: 572 Member
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    Just keep being honest. I am sure your comments brought some attention to those who were dieting in an unhealthy way.
  • Meiplé
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    see, one of the reasons i don't have friends on here is because of the judgemental attitude of some people. it's up to the individual what they decide to eat, and if you feel they are eating unhealthily maybe suggest some changes in a personal inbox message but i don't need people going through every single calorie deciding whether or not its nutritional, and saying 'i'll delete you because you ate chips two days in a row' :yawn:
  • BobbyDaniel
    BobbyDaniel Posts: 1,460 Member
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    I will look at a diary that is open before commenting...which actually keeps me from commentating most of the time.
  • alimac92
    alimac92 Posts: 705 Member
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    I often comment on my own diary when i am under calories but with not very good choices something like could have made better choices today!

    Having said that people rarely comment on my diary anyway

    I always read and comment on my friend's diaries. I have a small group because it is time consuming to read too many. I agree on the boring WTG comments and if I see another "Like" comment I think I will be really cheesed off lol.

    Well done on your weight loss anyway!

    :flowerforyou:
  • PositivelyFlawed
    PositivelyFlawed Posts: 316 Member
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    i always look at diaries before commenting, if its a great day of healthy choices within 100 calories of their goal I will give a positive comment. If they made great choices but are very under there calorie goal I still congratulate their choices and might offer something subtle like "Great choices! i'd be starving with only those few calories after that workout" If it's a day under calories with nothing but fast food i won't comment as i dont feel it's a victory to eat crap all day. I also routinely remove people who 1) make excuses constantly for why they arent eating right, exercising etc.. 2)consistently eat under calorie goals or eat unhealthy but under calorie goals. I have limited time for MFP and i rather give encouragement to my hard working pals fighting the good fight than someone on a crash diet!
  • lwoods34
    lwoods34 Posts: 302 Member
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    I have mfp friends that regularly or semi-regularly log very VERY low nets cals. And I mean 600 or below, or even regularly in the 3-400s.

    If I see a diary that low and it's unusual for them fine. If someone has had a massive burn and is struggling to plan the extra cals in, I might offer support with some advice on how to plan in extra snacks etc, or say not to worry if they "overeat" the following day because the body wont reset at midnight.

    BUT if someone is regularly netting very low, even apparently successfully, with regular weight loss, I'll comment that I think cals that low are unhealthy.

    However I see lot, and I mean LOTS of "well done", "wtg", "great job" replies on these ridiculously low net diaries.

    What I dont know is, do these people think that is a good number of net cals? or do they comment without even opening the diary?


    I honestly, dont comment on anyone's food diary unless they ask me to and are looking for suggestions or recommendations. Yes I do get concerned about people that are undereating OR overeating but I dont want to be overly critical because it could come off like I think I know everything there is to know about weight loss and I dont want to offend anyone! I will make a general post on my profile regarding calories and overeating and undereating but that is just to get the message out to EVERYONE, not just one particular person. As far as net calories are concerned, for me personally, I always net very low and I eat over 2,000 calories per day. I net low because I burn alot of calories and try to eat back my exercise calories but on most days that would require me to eat 2600-3000+ calories and there is no way that I could do that. I am already full from the food that I do eat. Also I really dont believe in the whole "net" thing because if I netted say "850" that means that I only ate 850 calories (calories eaten -calories burned)...there is no way that I would be able to function let alone continue to exercise day after day if that were really true. So I actually take that with a grain of salt. I know my body well enough to know that I should be eating 2100-2300 calories per day and that is without MFP.

    If people want comments or suggestions about their food diary, I will offer, but if not, I dont!
  • BPayton27
    BPayton27 Posts: 626 Member
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    Someone pointed out that you can change your notifications to not post your diary once you've completed it for the day. I didn't know that and will probably do it now. Thanks for that!

    I do look at my friends' diaries, but mostly because I am looking for new foods to eat. I don't follow any fad diets, nor do I restrict "bad" foods. I practice the moderation and exercise theory. If I want a small bit of something and have earned it, I don't want to be judged on it (which happens sometimes with condescending comments). If they've had a very apparent bad day and commented on it themselves, I will offer support and encouragement. If they don't comment on it, I usually don't either. I have started mentioning the very low net cals to closer friends, just because I am a bit worried about them.

    When I started here I didn't fully understand the net cals, etc. I was one of those who netted 300-600 regularly with success and thought I was doing well until I plateaued. It wasn't until a friend explained to me (kindly) what might be causing it. With her help, I was able to get past it and feel much better physically. Sometimes it is appropriate and sometimes not.
  • PositivelyFlawed
    PositivelyFlawed Posts: 316 Member
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    see, one of the reasons i don't have friends on here is because of the judgemental attitude of some people. it's up to the individual what they decide to eat, and if you feel they are eating unhealthily maybe suggest some changes in a personal inbox message but i don't need people going through every single calorie deciding whether or not its nutritional, and saying 'i'll delete you because you ate chips two days in a row' :yawn:

    It's one thing to have a couple snacky type days, it's another to eat crap day in and out in small quantities to stay under your goal. I don't individually judge each single entry. I take a look at the whole day. Did they get in some lean meats, fresh fruit and lots of veggies? If so I congratulate them, even if they had that little oz of chocolate or a soda at end of day. We're all human.

    It is, ofc, everyone's individual choice to eat what they want, but at the same time it is my choice to surround myself with people who have similar goals and attitudes.
  • minnesota_deere
    minnesota_deere Posts: 232 Member
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    I have mfp friends that regularly or semi-regularly log very VERY low nets cals. And I mean 600 or below, or even regularly in the 3-400s.

    If I see a diary that low and it's unusual for them fine. If someone has had a massive burn and is struggling to plan the extra cals in, I might offer support with some advice on how to plan in extra snacks etc, or say not to worry if they "overeat" the following day because the body wont reset at midnight.

    BUT if someone is regularly netting very low, even apparently successfully, with regular weight loss, I'll comment that I think cals that low are unhealthy.

    However I see lot, and I mean LOTS of "well done", "wtg", "great job" replies on these ridiculously low net diaries.

    What I dont know is, do these people think that is a good number of net cals? or do they comment without even opening the diary?

    nope
  • re1096
    re1096 Posts: 12 Member
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    Not my business what people eat or don't eat unless they specifically ask. i would hope that anyone would give me the same respect. I would be totally hurt if I was unfriended by someone based solely on my "net cals" which I have been told by my trainer, doctor, and RN not to worry about! Calories per day is what I have been advised to go by and I have my reporting set to such so I don't worry about this Net Cal thing.
  • JeanniebeanL79
    JeanniebeanL79 Posts: 96 Member
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    I am under most days but I am not being unhealthy, seeing that come up actually motivates me to exercise so I can gain exercise calories and then I leave just a little of them left so I know I did not overeat for the day. S o that status basically reminds me that I am making a lifestyle change and it is working. I comment those general comments sometimes because I know how hard people work to stay on their diet and I like to see people cheer me on as well. Sometimes diaries aren't even open to look at and when they are I use them just for healthy ideas, not to judge.
  • livinginwoods
    livinginwoods Posts: 562 Member
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    I want my friends to comment on my diary. I want their opinions. Their honest opinions. I need a push and a don't do that or a good job.

    Oh and I do look at diaries before I comment.
  • DisneyAddictRW
    DisneyAddictRW Posts: 800 Member
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    I wish people would leave honest comments. Some friends do but ores just say WTG. I had a friend comment once that I was doing good but needed to get more veggies in. It made me pissy because I thought I was doing good. Then I looked at my diary and realized I was lacking but never realized it till she said something. Now I make it a priority to get a balance in my food plan.

    I won't post unless I read it first. I wouldn't want to give someone a pat on the back for eating crap all day....day after day.
  • Kirsty_UK
    Kirsty_UK Posts: 964 Member
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    Absolutely how someone wants to eat is up to them, and if someone has been advised by their doctor to eat a certain way, fantastic that they are seeking medical advice.

    But I do consider it "my business" to offer my mfp friends the best support I can. For me, that includes being honest if I think someone is doing themselves harm by the way they are eating (and I would also value the same back from my mfp friends). If they disagree with my view, fine, no problem. I may keep them as a friend knowing we disagree (isnt that would good friendships are made of? not having everyone agree with you on everything), or I may decide our outlooks are so different that we can't really be mutually supportive, in which case, I think delete is the best way to go (though I've not taken that approach yet).

    What I was wondering though, is if people are simply commenting on diaries from the "is under their calorie goal" statement, which can be fuelling very very dangerous eating habits, that the person posting the diary thought were fine before, but now is even more sure what they are eating is fine, because they have had this reinforcement from people that didn't realise what they were reinforcing, which seems to me a very dangerous thing to be doing.

    In return, I also dont value the "support" of people that just write well done on my posts over and over, without ever reading any of it, it's just empty support to me.
  • ksabo1963
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    Amen - and what I thought was even funnier is when one of them deleted me because I would not play that game - I usually don't say anything and apparently this was a problem...oh well!
  • 1shauna1
    1shauna1 Posts: 993 Member
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    Maybe they haven't actually added in all their calories for the day? Sometimes if I'm adding mine, I accientally finish the day when I'm not really finished. Then it will post on my wall that I'm under my calories for the day (which I delete if I catch it).