How has your weight affected your "love" life?

245

Replies

  • strunkm4
    strunkm4 Posts: 265 Member
    I don't anything has changed at all. My bf and I are doing this together so we're both in it to win it! Lol.
  • Dtho5159
    Dtho5159 Posts: 1,054 Member
    When I met my husband at age 18, he weighed 110lb and I weighed 200ish. Our sex life went out the window when we got married and we have been married almost 8 years lol. I hope when I drop the rest of the lbs, it will get better but Im not counting on it :laugh: :noway: :grumble:
  • pinuplove
    pinuplove Posts: 12,871 Member
    Well, My fiance only wanted to date me for my looks in the first place(he didnt know me at all,before we dated. he'd always look at me in the school hallways though..). Then as we got to know eachother, his thoughts were not on looks anymore. I was 110-115 pounds (i also had anorexia/bulimia) when we first dated. Then after a year, in december, I gained 20 pounds, because he's an AMAZING cook & i couldnt stop eating his food xD I was the reason why he started to look at porn, which meant alot to me back then, it still hurts, but I really dont care anymore since we're having a baby, the baby means more to me than his foolishness in the past. He also told me I was overweight...at 110 pounds and 5'3...thats almost underweight according to the bmi charts..lol. But whatever. A little bit after that, like 3 months later, I lost those 20 pounds and he was all over me like a pig :P And now since Im pregnant, Ive gained 50 pounds, it seems like he's not interested in sexual things anymore..He still shows me he loves me though, and that's all that matters!!

    But eh, I love him & i know he still loves me, so, it really doesnt bother me too too much.

    Oh, honey, there are so many things wrong here I don't even know where to begin! Please, love yourself for who you are on the Inside. Everyone deserves to be loved for who they are, not what they look like! Congrats in your baby, and I hope you find true happiness.
  • rileamoyer
    rileamoyer Posts: 2,412 Member
    Well, My fiance only wanted to date me for my looks in the first place(he didnt know me at all,before we dated. he'd always look at me in the school hallways though..). Then as we got to know eachother, his thoughts were not on looks anymore. I was 110-115 pounds (i also had anorexia/bulimia) when we first dated. Then after a year, in december, I gained 20 pounds, because he's an AMAZING cook & i couldnt stop eating his food xD I was the reason why he started to look at porn, which meant alot to me back then, it still hurts, but I really dont care anymore since we're having a baby, the baby means more to me than his foolishness in the past. He also told me I was overweight...at 110 pounds and 5'3...thats almost underweight according to the bmi charts..lol. But whatever. A little bit after that, like 3 months later, I lost those 20 pounds and he was all over me like a pig :P And now since Im pregnant, Ive gained 50 pounds, it seems like he's not interested in sexual things anymore..He still shows me he loves me though, and that's all that matters!!

    But eh, I love him & i know he still loves me, so, it really doesnt bother me too too much.

    Oh, honey, there are so many things wrong here I don't even know where to begin! Please, love yourself for who you are on the Inside. Everyone deserves to be loved for who they are, not what they look like! Congrats in your baby, and I hope you find true happiness.


    This ^^^^^^
  • xHelloQuincyx
    xHelloQuincyx Posts: 884 Member
    lost four pounds last week
    more energy then a jack rabbit :p
  • ZombieChaser
    ZombieChaser Posts: 1,555 Member
    Wow...I'm having the opposit problem... Since losing weight, my bf has all of a sudden become a lot less interested in me. *sigh*
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
    You said "love" life but I'm confused. Are you talking about SEX?

    Well I'm single and having no sex so it hasn't changed that. haha But I imagine if I ever start having sex with a SO that I will be a lot more confident and comfortable aheming.

    As far as dating is concerned, weight loss has improved my game. I am more confident, dress up a lot more in cuter clothes, wear heels a lot more, talk about working out with my dates, etc etc. I actually feel HOT when I go out on a date.
  • rileamoyer
    rileamoyer Posts: 2,412 Member
    When I was heavy (really heavy) and depressed, my libido suffered, able to respond fine, just hard for me to initiate because I was not happy with how I looked. Weight gone, libido returned, not afraid to show off for DH, love his complements. Pretty simple, I feel better about myself. However - I am far from thin, don't think I would want to be either.
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
    When I was heavier, I was less interested in sex, for sure, I was too tired, I felt crappy about myself, and had underlying health issues as well. Now that I've lost most of the weight, I feel better and have more desire now. I'm hoping that my wife will see the benefits and lose weight with me!
  • DaBossLady24
    DaBossLady24 Posts: 556 Member
    Honestly, I never had a huge issue in the "love" life department even while gaining weight in on and off relationships. My biggest issue was always appreciating myself and my body while in the act while I was heavier.

    Now that the pounds are coming off, let's just say, the appreciation factor is on the up and up! :blushing:
  • havingitall
    havingitall Posts: 3,728 Member
    I met my husband when I was at my heaviest. He desired me then. We have both lost weight since then and the love life is great!

    So....no...not a prblem at one weight or another
  • rmsrws
    rmsrws Posts: 639 Member
    Not to knock "fat sex".....but "skinny sex" is like the bomb! The difference for me has been "Night and Day"!
  • auticus
    auticus Posts: 1,051 Member
    I was divorced because of my weight gain.

    It has been very difficult to date because of my weight.

    Now that I've lost a lot of weight, it has become a lot easier to have a love life.

    That's my experience.
  • SmartAlec03211988
    SmartAlec03211988 Posts: 1,896 Member
    73 lbs heavier, I was never approached. 73 lbs lighter, I'm approached on a regular basis by interested parties.

    Too bad they're all like 15 years OLDER THAN ME! WTF!
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
    I get a lot more male attention when my weight is close to where it should be. Even 10 pounds seems to make a difference. But I don't think the guys are any more quality.
  • charlotte66
    charlotte66 Posts: 248 Member
    Wow...I'm having the opposit problem... Since losing weight, my bf has all of a sudden become a lot less interested in me. *sigh*
    [/quote

    i thought it was just me!!! i have the same problem altho im still heavier than when we first met after my son was born he was all over me and now ive lost 18lbs he just isnt interested since i started to lose weight
  • mazzyw65
    mazzyw65 Posts: 47
    Utter libido death, which is very upsetting for both of us as we had a *very* healthy love life before I started feeling bad about myself.

    Totally the same, big stomach hangover and tired all the time - major passion killer!!!:grumble:
  • abigailm83
    abigailm83 Posts: 110
    I had less fun and felt more self conscious when I was bigger. So less libido, less lovin, angry boyfriend. Haha. Now that I work out more, am in better shape and love my body, it's much more fun!


    ^^^ This but I'm still working on getting in to better shape. He doesn't understand that 3 years, 70 lbs and a baby later I don't have the confidence that I had then.
  • La_Amazona
    La_Amazona Posts: 4,855 Member
    Being lighter makes so many things so much easier. It also makes it easier to discriminate who I'd want to date and who I wouldn't because I like certain things and if it doesn't look like she could do them without getting out of breath just walking up the stairs to my apartment, things aren't going to last long.

    This too! I want an active guy. So far several guys that I've dated, I have taken or mentioned going hiking/ jogging etc. It's something I'd love to share with a SO.

    Also (and this might sound superficial but I don't care- I've worked hard for my results) but I think I'm in another league now so I'm more picky on who I go out with.
  • Shausil82
    Shausil82 Posts: 218 Member
    I was obese from age 8 to 28, and either guys didn't notice me, or I was used as a science experiment by guys who wanted to see what it was like to be with a fat girl. I've never had a relationship before, and it's really depressed me.

    Since I lost my weight, I'm getting more attention, and even an old crush has taken an interest in me (well, he actually liked me before, but, I was in a bad place because of my weight and I had no idea that he liked me). Both of us are in maintenance mode with weight loss (he lost 10 pounds, and is toning).
  • mnwalkingqueen
    mnwalkingqueen Posts: 1,299 Member
    I honestly never had an issue as a big girl in the sex life department but I also have a very high sex drive.
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,024 Member
    I have never had a problem with my "love" life, no matter what size I was. But when I was with my exhusband, he gained so much weight while we were together, that I was no longer attracted to him.
  • triplejay1
    triplejay1 Posts: 84 Member
    Yep as the weight increased my libido decreased, could pretty much chart it.

    Positive side though is that having started to exercise again,it's on the up :happy:

    ^^^ this
    Since i have lost alot of weight and get plenty of exercise, im in the mood alot more, and its been alot more fun, LOL
  • BeeElMarvin
    BeeElMarvin Posts: 2,086 Member
    73 lbs heavier, I was never approached. 73 lbs lighter, I'm approached on a regular basis by interested parties.

    Too bad they're all like 15 years OLDER THAN ME! WTF!

    Hey, don't knock it until you try it! LOL
  • bushidowoman
    bushidowoman Posts: 1,599 Member
    Well, I think the extra weight I carried after having children did affect my love life, mainly because of the way *I* felt about myself. I did not feel sexy at all. I dressed frumpier. I did not wear cute nighties or underwear.
    Now that I'm working out regularly, have toned up, and am at a healthy weight, I have all this extra energy and feel like a vixen!
    So, yes, my love life has improved since I've lost weight. ;-)
  • bluberrygoo
    bluberrygoo Posts: 222 Member
    From 100 to 158 down to 108 up to 160 and now 100 lbs my love life has varied, but I have never gone more than 2 days without making love in the 4+ years I've been with my husband. We usually love make atleast once day, twice on weekends.
  • donna_glasgow
    donna_glasgow Posts: 869 Member
    Well, My fiance only wanted to date me for my looks in the first place(he didnt know me at all,before we dated. he'd always look at me in the school hallways though..). Then as we got to know eachother, his thoughts were not on looks anymore. I was 110-115 pounds (i also had anorexia/bulimia) when we first dated. Then after a year, in december, I gained 20 pounds, because he's an AMAZING cook & i couldnt stop eating his food xD I was the reason why he started to look at porn, which meant alot to me back then, it still hurts, but I really dont care anymore since we're having a baby, the baby means more to me than his foolishness in the past. He also told me I was overweight...at 110 pounds and 5'3...thats almost underweight according to the bmi charts..lol. But whatever. A little bit after that, like 3 months later, I lost those 20 pounds and he was all over me like a pig :P And now since Im pregnant, Ive gained 50 pounds, it seems like he's not interested in sexual things anymore..He still shows me he loves me though, and that's all that matters!!

    But eh, I love him & i know he still loves me, so, it really doesnt bother me too too much.

    Oh, honey, there are so many things wrong here I don't even know where to begin! Please, love yourself for who you are on the Inside. Everyone deserves to be loved for who they are, not what they look like! Congrats in your baby, and I hope you find true happiness.

    ditto this :)
  • BrunetteRunner87
    BrunetteRunner87 Posts: 591 Member
    I didn't have one before I started gaining weight (I would have been 16). Since I've lost 20 pounds I feel like it's gotten worse, because now I'm aware of my body and even though I am thinner I think about it more than when I was bigger.
  • NeuroticVirgo
    NeuroticVirgo Posts: 3,671 Member
    Yep as the weight increased my libido decreased, could pretty much chart it.

    Positive side though is that having started to exercise again,it's on the up :happy:

    This pretty much sums it up for me.
  • pinuplove
    pinuplove Posts: 12,871 Member
    73 lbs heavier, I was never approached. 73 lbs lighter, I'm approached on a regular basis by interested parties.

    Too bad they're all like 15 years OLDER THAN ME! WTF!

    Hey, don't knock it until you try it! LOL

    :laugh: I was thinking the same - experience is a GOOD thing!
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