Annoyed at unsolicited advice?

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spynoodle
spynoodle Posts: 404
in Health and Weight Loss
Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.
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  • watboy
    watboy Posts: 380 Member
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    I soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo agree, everyone seems to have the "secret" to weightloss even overweight people...
    ...

    It's terrible between people on here or people in the real world it gets a bit to much. Funny I actually had someone tell me "if you don't know your BMR or TDEE you will never lose weight." Which I replied with "umm I lost 60 lbs before I had evenheard of MFP. um never knew my BMR , TDEE I don't use a HRM." Honestly all this math to lose weight is a tad much as well. I'm not saying it doesn't help some people but I lost weight and I'm keeping it off without having to do secret handshake and pulling out a calculator. Then you have people saying "out are eating to little, you are to much, you eat to many carbs, you don't eat enough carbs, you need more protein, you work out to little, you work out to much" It's really insane. I got some unsolictiated advice years and years ago from a woman who was at least 100 lbs overweight.... Really? come on.... So what I learned is it's nobodies business what I eat or don't eat and it's not my business what they do either. It's a personal voyage. Now if people ask me for advice I will proved it but I don't expect them to follow it , and if I want some advice I ask for it fully knowing they my say something I don't agree with. But people if we don't ask for it don't give to us and if you do keep your judgementalness to yourself
    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.
  • spynoodle
    spynoodle Posts: 404
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    I got a "You need to eat better." from a non-MFP friend who has NO idea what I'm eating. Even if it's true that I eat like cr@p, he wouldn't know it!
  • watboy
    watboy Posts: 380 Member
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    lol that's just sad. I love my friends and if they offer advice it's because they are trying to be caring but then there some people who just know it all. ...
    I got a "You need to eat better." from a non-MFP friend who has NO idea what I'm eating. Even if it's true that I eat like cr@p, he wouldn't know it!
  • MrDude_1
    MrDude_1 Posts: 2,510 Member
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    This is why I never mention anything fitness related.... and then I never hear about it.


    Then again, I also bite my tongue and dont say anything, even when someone I know is doing something "wrong" or "incorrect".... I dont know if thats always a good thing either.
    For example, I know damn well you cant out exercise a bad diet... but its hard to tell that to someone, especially when they are killing themselves in dance, gym, exercise outside of that, etc... because all they hear is "you did all that work for nothing"
  • 1WorkoutAtATime
    1WorkoutAtATime Posts: 719
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    annoying indeed
  • _HeathBar_
    _HeathBar_ Posts: 902 Member
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    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Have you thought that maybe they are trying to be helpful because they care about your well being? Nah, that would be crazy.
  • BrianSharpe
    BrianSharpe Posts: 9,248 Member
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    That's one of the reasons I never tell anyone that I'm trying to lose weight (I'm just training for a race :wink: ) and when someone volunteers some fitness tidbit (unless it's someone who I know is competent to offer advice) I can usually finish the conversation politely by asking their opinion of the how much the coefficient of rolling resistance varies between bike tire x and y, or how best to achieve early vertical forearm for swimming - the blank looks are priceless.
  • DarthCeltic
    DarthCeltic Posts: 1,274 Member
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    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.


    by reading this title i thought i had let my alter ego who is a horn dog have control of my profile.. whew.. close one..
  • ALW65
    ALW65 Posts: 643 Member
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    :wink: That reminds me....you know you really need to boost your protein intake, and I noticed you're not drinking enough, and you're doing those exercises all the wrong way with bad form, and if you would just drink more wine you would lose weight, and.......

    People can be so funny....I generally say something like, "well that's an interesting approach, but here's what my doctor said that's helping me to lose really well..."
  • Acg67
    Acg67 Posts: 12,142 Member
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    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Yes cause as we all know their physique is totally indicative of their knowledge of the subject
  • L00py_T0ucan
    L00py_T0ucan Posts: 1,378 Member
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    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Yes, but I try not to take it personally. In this day and age, it seems impossible to avoid 'health' topics in everyday life.

    My goal is to be healthy and to LIVE WELL, and I know that when people hear me talk about running they are wondering why I am not one of those stringy runners with no extra body fat. So I am pretty selective about when and with whom I discuss the running. I am sort of a closet runner, for this reason.

    Finally, the 'You need to eat better' is usually that person speaking out loud about themself!
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
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    I don't let others control me that much. If people want to run their mouths all day to hear themselves think, then more power to them. I just say, "thanks, I'll keep that in mind" and go about my badassery.


    Also, fat people can be pretty frucking smart about fitness, so that whole 'being judgmental' thing is kinda d!ckish.
  • oscar478
    oscar478 Posts: 2
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    Yes, but I just tell them what I am doing is working for me and I'm happy with the progress. But then again, I realize I've given other people unsolicited advice too... although that's usually just Get MFP!
  • UnderCoverShyGirl
    UnderCoverShyGirl Posts: 254 Member
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    Well i'll chime in as the morbidly obese person that does give advice sometimes (though not unsolicited, that is my pet peeve to!). I do have to comment on the posts mentioning being particularly annoyed when it's from an overweight person. While i get the point, i think that just because one doesn't do something, or hasn't conquered their own personal demons, doesn't mean they don't have information that is valuable and valid. Overweight people are often experts in the fact that they've read every book out there, been on a zillion diets and have lots of experience LOL, including how to lose and gain back!

    Anyone that is trying to tell someone that they "must" be or do something is an idiot because no one is in another person's shoes. All we can do is share info that we learn, things that do and don't work for us,what we've witnessed with others and leave it at that. I try to temper any suggestions i may have with a "take my advice i'm not using it" disclaimer since i haven't tackled all my demons LOL.

    I also have to say that i've had fellow overweight people try to tell me what i "must" do or not do, and super fit people tell me...and when it's unsolicited, i think both are annoying. While i can definately see that a fit person is doing something "right", it still might only be "right for them"....Either way, i hate it.
  • harebearva
    harebearva Posts: 216 Member
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    Do you get annoyed when people offer unsolicited weight loss advice? Especially when they are are in worse shape than you? I don't like the judgmental tone it sometimes comes with.
    I admit, I do a little. I just smile and bite my tongue.

    Yes cause as we all know their physique is totally indicative of their knowledge of the subject

    AMEN! The other thing that kills me is when people actually stop you and ask your opinion on nutrition and weight loss and they disagree with everything you say.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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  • chelso0o
    chelso0o Posts: 366 Member
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    I find the exact opposite.... People always come to me for weight loss advice and ask what I think of "Fad Diet XYZ" and I always reply with "You have to find out what works for you. For me, it was finding a sport that I love to participate in and eating a healthier diet. If you think Fad diet XYZ will work for the rest of your life, then great! I think you should try it!"

    I don't know what to say to them other than that? I know that telling them to try a fad diet is wrong, but people are going to do what they want to do anyway.

    Another thing. I'd unfriend any MFP advice givers that don't mesh with your beliefs. Everyone is different and it takes different ways to motivate people. Some people LIKE advice givers (I am like that. I LIKE the unsolicited advice) and some people do not. Just because you friended someone on here doesn't mean you have to stay friends.
  • awidener86
    awidener86 Posts: 260 Member
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    It gets on my everlasting last nerve. Especially when they are losing the unhealthy way (not eating)
  • chipembele
    chipembele Posts: 54 Member
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    Anyone tries to advise me without me asking them I ignore them.

    I felt like interjecting today when someoen was proclaiming they were aiming to only have 800 calories. I resisted and isntead thought 'oh dear'.

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