Sexytime accidents

I have a broken bed story with a cat and a candle then fire and a guy. I might not want o tell that one. Kitty was okay thank god! Bahahaha

My girlfriend at the time dislocated her hip....try explaining that to the E.R.

Trying to picture the work up to this......daaaaaammmmnnnn! Woo hoo!

Im totally not even going there, only my best friends know this one.. Its one guys would all cringe in pain if they knew. Im sure someone else has done it before.. but it doesnt need to be brought up lol :glasses:

you can't tease us. SPILL IT!

Yeah!Come on tell us!

Lol... I really cant.. It happened with someone on MFP, we werent on there at the time but we both happen to be now.. No longer together but the pain was all mine lol.

When your hubby is a cook, remind him to wash his hand many, many, many ...... times after working with hot peppers at work.

And once when we were dating my hubby ripped himself while we were going at it. Blood EVERYWHERE. Me, him, the sheets, the bathroom...

^^ this.. the part where the foreskin joins the tip.. cant remember the name for it... Tore the **** out of that.

So much pain... sooooo sooooo much blood.

Looked like someone tipped bottles of red wine all over the bed.

I still cringe when I think about it. Lubrication is the key :mad:

Wedding night, too drunk to really function, wife down to just her veil, runs...leaps onto the bed....bounces and slams head into bed side table and then hits the floor.....end wedding night sexy time.

When your hubby is a cook, remind him to wash his hand many, many, many ...... times after working with hot peppers at work.

And once when we were dating my hubby ripped himself while we were going at it. Blood EVERYWHERE. Me, him, the sheets, the bathroom...

^^ this.. the part where the foreskin joins the tip.. cant remember the name for it... Tore the **** out of that.

So much pain... sooooo sooooo much blood.

Looked like someone tipped bottles of red wine all over the bed.

I still cringe when I think about it. Lubrication is the key :mad:

Yup, I knew that you share his pain. It was like a murder scene.
Though I still don't know how it happened, there was no shortage of lube. Over-zealous I guess

When your hubby is a cook, remind him to wash his hand many, many, many ...... times after working with hot peppers at work.

And once when we were dating my hubby ripped himself while we were going at it. Blood EVERYWHERE. Me, him, the sheets, the bathroom...

^^ this.. the part where the foreskin joins the tip.. cant remember the name for it... Tore the **** out of that.

So much pain... sooooo sooooo much blood.

Looked like someone tipped bottles of red wine all over the bed.

I still cringe when I think about it. Lubrication is the key :mad:

Yup, I knew that you share his pain. It was like a murder scene.
Though I still don't know how it happened, there was no shortage of lube. Over-zealous I guess

Yeah, i think you just have to mega unlucky, right amount friction and Boom. Its gone..

I can still feel the pain now lol.

my husband and I literally went through a wall once. He was holding me against the wall when we were house-sitting a friends house (they were doing construction and it was just drywall not an actual wall) So yeah got fiberglass all over my *kitten* and the landing wasn't very graceful. Haven't attempted wall fun since but we still laugh about it!!

he said, "Oops, wrong hole!" I said, "Noooo, right hole." :drinker:

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

We were in a certain numbered position and my son walked in, he was 12 at the time. Yep.

A similar situation happend to me back in December. Let's say I was enjoying a certain calorie free munch session & her 7 year old son walked in. The little *kitten* had picked the lock & screamed "Mom is having sex". Let's just say I lost it & it took awhile to get it back.:blushing: :grumble:

My husband and I have broken MANY, MANY, things... Like a ridiculous amount of things. anything in a bathroom that you can break, we have broken it. Hahaha. Its terrible, and expensive. Hahaha. I can't remember any specifics, but I know he has elbowed me in the face multiple times and I punched him in the face one time. One time we were doing it outside on a trampoline and I guess he moved his feet as the same time that I was moving and we slightly bounced, knocking our heads together. LOL


(Before I got married) I had a bf named mark and we were having sex in the woods and i was on a piece of wood. SOMEHOW he fell forward and OVER me and face planted into some mud! Hahahah One time we were also having sex behind a walmart and while he was uhhh, ya know, he leaned his head back, hitting the back of his head on a metal pole really hard. He almost cried. Me being the as*hole I am, I laughed SO hard both of these times.

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