Don't want to be rude BUT

135

Replies

  • jaxbeck
    jaxbeck Posts: 537 Member
    Not rude. Not rude at all. You can still eat with them, but not what they're eating.

    THIS!
    The ones that take offense are the ones with the problem. Expect some office talk about you, expect some comments to your face. But next time someone tells you that you are too skinny, tell them they are too fat and ask what the differnce is? If you shouldnt be offended when they comment on your weight why should they get offended when you comment on theirs?

    Totally THIS! A few years ago when I first starting working at my job, I was very small. everyone wanted to comment about how I was too skinny & I should eat more until one day I had enough & told a quite overweight woman "why is it that you think it's ok to constantly comment on my weight, how would you like it if I went on & on about how fat you are."
    Stunned!
  • fimary
    fimary Posts: 274 Member
    Not rude. Not rude at all. You can still eat with them, but not what they're eating.


    here here, why do you have to like what they are eating, i wouldn't not do if everyone in the world liked the same thing, i would bring my own salad, be true to you own beliefs of healthy eating.
  • 2wiceOver
    2wiceOver Posts: 38
    Yeah, don't worry about them, worry about yourself. We had a huge potluck here at work the other day, I found little to nothing that I could safely eat on the table. I took part in the pictures and patting eachother on the back and then went ahead and ate my normal daily lunch.

    Everyone knows what I'm working toward so nobody found it rude. Not that I'm aware of anyway.
  • MelissaGraham7
    MelissaGraham7 Posts: 406 Member
    Not rude at all. Actually, you may also find that organizers and colleagues are receptive to a suggestion of throwing in some healthier choices. I've been in the situation in the past, and once I mentioned it (gently) that I love that it is provided but am working hard on my health and wish there were some healthier options, not only did others chime in (no one ever wants to be the one to broach the topic) but the organizers were always receptive and instituted changes. It is win-win for everyone to go ahead and make a polite suggestion and also to eat or bring whatever you would like. You might just be the trend setter!
  • 2April
    2April Posts: 285 Member
    I'd control my portions if I thought the lunch had too many calories and I'd go get something else if I thought the food looked gross. Also, I would answer honestly if anyone questioned me about it. Bring some apples and almonds or stuff you like from home for times when you just pick at the lunch but don't want to bother buying something else.
    On a side note - I think ham, salad, and mac and cheese sounds OK. Some people are making it sound like the people who would eat that are total pigs or something.
  • mem1086
    mem1086 Posts: 136 Member
    I have to legitimately ask. What's unhealthy about mac and cheese?

    Nothing is unhealthy about mac and cheese is prepared in a healthy way (whole grain noodles, low fat cheese, etc) but this has the oils seeping through heavy duty plates. Also, I am noticing that this type of oily food upsets my stomach, I have acute IBS.

    Thanks everyone for the input. I'm gonna get my normal salad and brush off the comments. I figure that if I want to eat something that high in calories, it better be chocolate or something I am really craving!
  • captnemo44
    captnemo44 Posts: 82 Member
    When i have work meetings they order pizza, now i bring my own healthy lunch.
  • mem1086
    mem1086 Posts: 136 Member
    Jesus that's gross! We have the same team lunch each friday, but I order things like Sushi, Sandwiches, salads from local places. On occasion I'll order Dominos or Subway! Give her feedback or suggestions, this is what I ask the guys for, its the only way to improve the gesture. :)

    And not every week is like this, sometimes we get wraps, Subway, etc. Last week was a taco bar, which was great cause I made a nice taco salad. It's just that when its healthy choices it is really healthy, and when it is bad it is very bad!
  • tripn404
    tripn404 Posts: 109 Member
    bump
  • marsellient
    marsellient Posts: 591 Member
    Participate in the meeting, eat what you know will keep you healthy, no explanation necessary. If pushed, perhaps a comment about how they really don't want to know what eating certain things does to your digestion will silence those questioning. Look after the IBS.
  • PaleoPath4Lyfe
    PaleoPath4Lyfe Posts: 3,161 Member
    I need some help! So everyweek at my job we have a lunch and learn meeting where lunch is provided. This is great for the wallet, but bad for the waistline. The woman in charge of ordering is rather large and has little to no concern for eating healthy. SO that means that I am stuck eating fatty greasy foods. For instance, this week is Ham, baked bake mac & cheese, and salad. The mac and cheese is so loaded with grease that it has in the past upset my stomach, and since I have not had anything this heavy in a while, I know it will end badly in the bathroom later. Now before you go and tell me to load up on salad, they only order enough for a side salad, so I dont want to be a pig and load up on it.

    My question is, is it rude go and get a salad from the salad bar? I have already been told I am too skinny, so I am sure this will go over like a ton of bricks. I have already offered to help plan what we are eating, but that is not working, obviously.

    Please help!

    For lunch and learn events at work I usually bring meat and a veggie and then eat salad. If I am asked, I tell them this is my Dr prescribed plan.

    That usually shuts people up.
  • Pam8865
    Pam8865 Posts: 4
    It isn't rude to take care care of yourself. I'm surprised that better options are not being provided especially since this is a weekly event. Part of my job is to provide lunches for meetings, etc on occasion and I ALWAY make sure to provide healthy options. If you haven't tried talking to her before about providing healthy choices do that. Even though she's overweight she may not be thinking of others and ordering what she likes.
  • Hungry_Tuna
    Hungry_Tuna Posts: 361 Member
    Pack your own lunch. Period. Stop accommodating to other's feelings and focus on yourself and your well being first and foremost. Sounds selfish, but you shouldn't be forced into eating something that doesn't fit your nutritional needs just to appear polite.
  • herownkindofwonderfull
    herownkindofwonderfull Posts: 307 Member
    I have got to the point when in that situation I bring something or load up on salad. When people are eating those other things salad is usually the last thing on their minds. Also keep a stash of Zone Perfect bars on hand. They have saved me on many occasions.

    ^ agreed.
  • SassyCalyGirl
    SassyCalyGirl Posts: 1,932 Member
    bring your own lunch and NO you do not need to explain it to them. Its your life your body.
  • herownkindofwonderfull
    herownkindofwonderfull Posts: 307 Member
    And not every week is like this, sometimes we get wraps, Subway, etc. Last week was a taco bar, which was great cause I made a nice taco salad. It's just that when its healthy choices it is really healthy, and when it is bad it is very bad!

    On a positive note, it's nice that you know what will be served ahead of time. That way, on the unhealthy days, you can go ahead and pack a lunch or pick up something else.
  • My1985Freckles
    My1985Freckles Posts: 1,039 Member
    Maybe tell the woman that the baked mac and cheese tends to upset you stomach and could they order extra salad?
  • lil_pulp
    lil_pulp Posts: 701 Member
    Just lie and say that your doctor told you that you need to watch your cholesterol or something and has "prescribed" only whole foods for the majority of your meals.
  • Schraudt814
    Schraudt814 Posts: 496 Member
    This is YOUR journey...if your co workers make fun of you for taking care of your body that's their problem, not yours. I don't think it's rude at all for you to try and keep yourself on track for those darn work lunches. Good luck!
  • j77r68
    j77r68 Posts: 271 Member
    It's only rude if you go about it wrong. I understand where all the other posters are coming from but.... I don't understand why you would have to go out of your way to eat at a meeting when noone else would?!? I'm sure you are not the only one wanting to eat healthy and you are definitely not the only one that would have bathroom issues shortly afterwards ! I would try to talk to the organizer before the next meeting and ask if there were any other options we could go with, and if she hmmmm and hahhhhh over it than suggest you could go price some other options. Most places have a variety of both healthy and not so healthy. And if you could make them a permanent go-to for all meetings you could probably get a discount of some sort. I wuld always take a little stash of your own stuff plus a bottle of water because i know when we have meetings they are all day and I am famished usually way before their "air" breaks come around.(smokers) Good Luck
  • cygnetpro
    cygnetpro Posts: 419 Member
    If this was just a "once in a while" thing, I'd probably suggest nibbling at what they bought, etc. But since this is a weekly issue, I see no reason why you should feel obligated to join in with food that you wouldn't normally eat.

    There are tactful ways to handle it, but I think you shouldn't be made to feel bad if you don't want to have a weekly "go off the rails" meal. It's reasonable to ask to have some healthier choices, especially if you're offering to help make it happen. Good luck!
  • marieautumn
    marieautumn Posts: 928 Member
    i would lie and say i was suffering from a diary allergy and that milk products were upsetting my stomache lately, then get a salad and a little ham.
  • Matt_Wild
    Matt_Wild Posts: 2,673 Member
    Take your own meal in.
  • AshinAms
    AshinAms Posts: 283 Member
    Invent an allergy, or become vegetarian...
  • leelee330
    leelee330 Posts: 8 Member
    In my opinion - you can do do one of two things - plain and simply -- either ask that they add something vegetarian (just say that so you don't have to explain your "diet" - I order food for corporate meetings all the time and ALWAYS include vegetarian and otherwise healthy options - its not about ordering what I WANT - its about ordering what the majority would like and to provide options - but I understand you cant really say that to the person ordering --) OR, you can bring your own (which is what I would do) and, if anyone says anything - handle it with grace and say "I prefer this, thank you" - you do not owe anyone an explanation to why you eat the way you do :)
  • CityOnAHill
    CityOnAHill Posts: 136 Member
    Listen girl, it's your life. there is no reason why you should put something in you mouth that is going to upset your insides.Go to the salad bar often enough and someone might follow your example. It is not rude to eat what your body needs. do not apologize. laugh and eat what YOU need. :flowerforyou: ::drinker:

    This.
  • AshinAms
    AshinAms Posts: 283 Member
    Also, if you claim you have IBS and then go into great detail about the symptoms and what each specific food does to your bowels they will be happy to let you eat whatever you want ;)
  • stevewynjones
    stevewynjones Posts: 1,052 Member
    It's your body! :angry: Eat what you want and screw what other think!:grumble:

    Yeah!:glasses:
  • hosegirl
    hosegirl Posts: 157
    The person doing the ordering might think that she is ordering what is termed a balance meal- Meat, starch and vegetable, but does not realize that it isn’t. I find it interesting that you judge the person as not caring what she eats when I think we were all like that at one time, until MFP. I would do one of the following: Ask if you can help with planning the menu. Bring your own lunch. Eat your lunch before and have a side salad.
  • dlyeates
    dlyeates Posts: 875 Member
    With that menu I would have the ham and salad and bring an extra morning snack and extra afternoon snack. Eat before you go in, have the lunch but don't eat the crap that will upset your stomach and then eat an afternoon snack a little later.

    Just because it's there doesn't mean you have to eat it.
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