Don't want to be rude BUT

I agree with most folks here...it's definitely not rude. I have to deal with this a fair amount, and it was initially a problem because I get invited to various internal group lunches and external lunches....so, I don't have one person organizing all my lunches. Also, I'm in the South...so, the definition of "healthy" can be greasy green beans or a salad with fried chicken. So, even when I've mentioned healthier meals, they don't often turn out that way (which can be the worst because then the organizer went out of their way for you and you don't want to offend them).

However, I've learned a few tricks. Within my own group, I've just let people know that I eat healthy and bring my own lunch...so, when I nibble at the provided lunch, they all know that I'm going to have my own meal later. Also, while I know it's wasteful, I've found that no one thinks twice once you put the food on the plate and mix it around...so, I'll put a few things on my plate (mostly salad) to make it look good and then just eat some of the salad and then toss it. Lastly, when I'm not with my own group that knows I eat healthy or when I get some flak for not eating (I actually got some yesterday), I usually just make a quick joke about "swimsuit season coming up" (although, I'm a little husky...so, this works as a joke for me) or something to that effect...and if they push (like they did yesterday), then I tell them I packed my lunch and don't want it to go to waste (for me, I'll also mention that I have so many of these lunches that I've learned I get a lot "rounder" if I eat too many of them! Everyone usually gets that, too.).

So, in short, I don't think passing on the main course is rude at all. Where I live, I am definitely a little more cautious about offending people (people down here love their food and take it personally), but I've also learned that if you're just polite about it and don't get all judgey, then you're usually fine.

I would eat the free side salad and bring something healthy from home to go with it. I would probably make sure it was some really yummy leftovers rather than more salad. Mostly because I'm not a big fan of salad, but also because I like to show people that being thin doesn't require eating only salad.

If someone commented that I was too skinny, I'd simply reply "It's better than being too fat." and go back to enoying my healthy lunch.

It's like this. In many offices all across America it is customary to order lunches that provide tasty, free food and this often means fattening foods from caterers. It is one way that office workers bond and a way for a company to show appreciation for their employees, and for that reason, it is no wonder that some of the same food usually reserved for family "get togethers" and holidays is featured. These situations also occur when you're part of any other organization as well (churches, book clubs). It's not that people want to deny you the right to eat healthy, it's just that they know better. They know you can exercise portion control and know that indulging yourself every once in awhile is not going to derail your fitness goals. The skinny girl in the office is annoying to people because theyre breaking a custom and they do not have a good reason for doing it. It's not that people are jealous but they find it irritating that the skinny office girl thinks her diet is superior. It's your preference versus something much bigger, a tradition among office workers to enjoy themselves and bond. There are many times were I ate something I did not want to out of respect. It really does offend people when you do not want to eat the food they made. Say, if my boyfriend's mother cooks something that I don't like I still eat some of it. I don't pig out on it--why would I? It's not a food that I like. It's about being courteous and sensitive to the feelings of others.

I would just pack a lunch and explain that you're trying to watch what you eat. Nobody should argue with you about that, and if they do it's kind of rude on their part.

^^ This! and If they make a big deal about it, the appropriate response is "And this is your business because........?":huh: :huh:

It might come across as rude if you do this on your own and the person organising may feel that you are attacking. Why not get the support of some of your colleagues and 'mention' that the food choices could be more healthy. Perhaps say how much you enjoy the meetings but wish there was more choice?

^^This. I totally agree. Ally yourself with people who feel the same way. It sounds like change isn't going to happen with this without some help. Good luck! :drinker: :flowerforyou:

I work in a school and lunch is provided everyday as long as you are eating with the kids - everyone has Lunch Duty with their kids daily. But, I never eat the school food. It suppose overall it isn't bad, but it definitely adds up. I always bring my own lunch and eat it at a later time, when the kids are at their specials or recess, instead. Occasionally people mention it but nobody has ever been offended by it. A few of them even say that sounds like a good idea but rarely do people bring their own.

I usually make a sandwich with rice cake chips or the hormeal ready to eat stuff. My lunch is always under 400 cal.


Now, if we have a professional day with no kids, I will eat with them because they expect all the teachers to be together...I just eat pretty much only salad with maybe a few bites of whatever else there is. No one's mentioned that either so I think you should be able to find some workaround.

I would just take my own packed lunch and if anybody asks you about it just be honest and say that it upsets your tummy if you eat foods that are too rich and you don't want to feel ill. Nobody can argue with that

I don't think it's rude at all. There are certain things that I can't eat because I know that they'll cause problems a little later and I've learned to just take a pass at those foods, certain restaurants, etc. I don't worry anymore about what others think - I just concentrate on me, and what makes my belly happy. On many occasion I've even told people that I have an "intollerance" to certain foods, and they have been more mindful of things going forward. I wouldn't explain that you're "watching what you eat" - just eat what makes you feel good and don't worry about the others.

My question is, is it rude go and get a salad from the salad bar? I have already been told I am too skinny, so I am sure this will go over like a ton of bricks. I have already offered to help plan what we are eating, but that is not working, obviously.

I've never seen anyone ridiculed for making healthy eating choices at work. Hell, I've gone to lunch meetings and watched everyone else eat while I sip on a Coke Zero. It's nobody's business why I'm eating or not eating.

And in your situation, if you choose to get your own healthy meal, rather than eating the crap provided, I don't see why anyone would fault you for it. If they do, they're idiots. And who cares what idiots think?

Is it really even about the skinny aspect of it? I'd say it's more that greasy foods cause you gastro issues and for your health you choose not to eat them. Period. And if there are others that give you slack then so be it.... this is your body and you are the only one that knows what it does and does not need.

You can relay this kindly, of course. Good luck!