embarressed of S.O.

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squishycow7
squishycow7 Posts: 820 Member
in Chit-Chat
at work this morning, a woman was talking to me about how she hid/ran away from someone she saw out in public because she didn't want this person to see how fat her boyfriend had become.

thoughts?
has anyone ever done this???
how would you feel if your girl/boyfriend told you they'd done that?
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Replies

  • roachhaley
    roachhaley Posts: 978 Member
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    That's really terrible. They obviously have their priorities all wrong.
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
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    That's really terrible. They obviously have their priorities all wrong.

    This.

    /thread
  • lynette111
    lynette111 Posts: 77 Member
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    I have never been embarrassed of how my husband's body looks although he does have a belly. My only problem is occasionally when we are planning on going out he doesn't put forth much effort to look nice. He gets upset with me when I say something when he comes out in dirty jeans or work clothes (he is blue collar which I'm perfectly fine with). He has nice clothes so no excuse not to look nice. To me that is just being lazy. I maybe shouldn't care what someone would think about him or us as a couple but I do. I always try to put my best foot forward and don't think there is anything wrong with that. I don't tell him what to wear but just please put forth a little effort and look nice and while I'm on it-shave!
  • harribo_mum
    harribo_mum Posts: 58
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    My fiance has been morbidly obese since we met and I would never be embarrassed to be with him. I love him for who he is not what he is and I'f anyone else has a problem with it its their problem not mine!

    Your friend obviously has her priorities wrong.
  • ArroganceInStep
    ArroganceInStep Posts: 6,239 Member
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    I'm pretty big, my fiancee has never done anything like that to me.
  • squishycow7
    squishycow7 Posts: 820 Member
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    My fiance has been morbidly obese since we met and I would never be embarrassed to be with him. I love him for who he is not what he is and I'f anyone else has a problem with it its their problem not mine!

    Your friend obviously has her priorities wrong.

    right, agreed! & she was saying that he wasn't fat when they first met, so she's not "used" to him being bigger... not sure if that makes her worse or not, I don't know... she said even when she plans to introduce him to people she always prefaces with "he's fat, but he's really nice!" :/


    edit cause I can't spell >.<
  • auticus
    auticus Posts: 1,051 Member
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    That may have been my ex wife. She told me constantly she was humiliated by my presence because she deserved better than a fat guy. Pretty much means that in a relationship, she values the social benefits of being with someone over anything else and thus wants the social points for someone that makes her girlfriends jealous of her.
  • LifeOnMars_
    LifeOnMars_ Posts: 755 Member
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    Terrible.
  • PepeGreggerton
    PepeGreggerton Posts: 986 Member
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    I've been embarrassed by a previous SO. Not because of weight, because she couldn't spell lettuce.
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
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    If they are that embarrassed of their S.O. then they don't love them. My S.O. does things that are embarrassing (to himself) all the time. I don't have to run and hide over it.
  • ArroganceInStep
    ArroganceInStep Posts: 6,239 Member
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    right, agreed! & she was saying that he wasn't fat when they first met, so she's not "used" to him being bigger... not sure if that makes her worse or not, I don't know... she said even when she introduces him to people she always prefaces with "he's fat, but he's really nice!" :/


    edit cause I can't spell >.<

    Sounds like she's trying to come to terms with his weight gain. I can understand the sentiment, but airing dirty laundry like that in public is a pretty crummy thing to do.
  • roachhaley
    roachhaley Posts: 978 Member
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    That may have been my ex wife. She told me constantly she was humiliated by my presence because she deserved better than a fat guy. Pretty much means that in a relationship, she values the social benefits of being with someone over anything else and thus wants the social points for someone that makes her girlfriends jealous of her.

    I bet you a hundred bucks she didn't deserve better than you
  • Shriffee
    Shriffee Posts: 250 Member
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    That's pathetic. I'd be embarrassed of her.
  • onedayillbeamilf
    onedayillbeamilf Posts: 966 Member
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    That's horrible. I know how the boyfriend feels. Poor guy.
  • squishycow7
    squishycow7 Posts: 820 Member
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    That may have been my ex wife. She told me constantly she was humiliated by my presence because she deserved better than a fat guy. Pretty much means that in a relationship, she values the social benefits of being with someone over anything else and thus wants the social points for someone that makes her girlfriends jealous of her.

    I bet you a hundred bucks she didn't deserve better than you

    ^ COMPLETELY AGREE <3
  • WhittRak
    WhittRak Posts: 572 Member
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    I like to show off my SO! He is handsome and has some muscles :) I am the flabby one, but he likes to show me of too. So no, never have I done this, or want it done to me.
  • susannamarie
    susannamarie Posts: 2,148 Member
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    right, agreed! & she was saying that he wasn't fat when they first met, so she's not "used" to him being bigger... not sure if that makes her worse or not, I don't know... she said even when she plans to introduce him to people she always prefaces with "he's fat, but he's really nice!" :/


    edit cause I can't spell >.<

    I wonder how she'd feel if her bf started introducing her as 'she's *****y, but she's really skinny!'
  • JPod279
    JPod279 Posts: 722 Member
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    I seriously wish my wife had said something to me when I had put on about 20-30 pounds instead of just watching me get bigger. Of course, I would have wanted it to be said in a nice way, but said.
  • shelbyfrootcake
    shelbyfrootcake Posts: 965 Member
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    I don't necessarily think the friend does have her priorities wrong. Is it nice? No, but that's not the point.

    I love my partner but his total disregard for his health (which has caused him to gain 2 stone since we started seeing each other) is a source of personal embarassment for me, especially when I'm working to try to improve my health. Watching someone you care about let themselves go is hard.
  • ArroganceInStep
    ArroganceInStep Posts: 6,239 Member
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    I seriously wish my wife had said something to me when I had put on about 20-30 pounds instead of just watching me get bigger. Of course, I would have wanted it to be said in a nice way, but said.

    This. Whether you agree with the sentiment or not this really isn't about how she feels about his newfound weight gain, it's how she's going about dealing with it that's the problem.

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