Do Long Distance Relationships Work?

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  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
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    not sure how this has anything to do with fitness but no! they defs do not work
    I think the problem may be in the participants, not the concept :) sure works fine for me and countless other people in this thread alone.
  • JSheehy1965
    JSheehy1965 Posts: 404
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    My wife and I met online back in 97, I lived in the UK and she was in the US. We did the long distance with 2-3 visits a year for about 3 years until I got my visa and moved to the US and we got married in 2000.

    If both people are committed it will work regardless of distance or how much contact you have but it will not be easy and there will be hard times that you will both have to get through.

    Here is a website I suggest you take a look at if you are serious about moving to the US


    http://www.familybasedimmigration.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?s=9726c18a3505c01806ee283aadc6a674&f=2

    Also as a quick link read through this about 10 times so you have an idea of what it will take to apply and complete the visa process.

    http://www.familybasedimmigration.com/forum/k1visa.php
    Good luck

    Yup - I came over on a "fiance visa" and my husband had to apply for me to come and live in the USA. It was a LOT of paperwork, but I'm so glad we persevered.
  • grapeeyes1
    grapeeyes1 Posts: 237 Member
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    I married my husband 3.5 years ago. I lived in the US, he lived in the UK. It was hard at times, but so worth it. Take my advice though. Keep thorough records of your relationship for immigration. They are a really difficult aspect of the relationship. But, if you both are strong and truly love each other, then it is worth it. My husband is the most wonderful man in the world and I have never been happier.
  • grapeeyes1
    grapeeyes1 Posts: 237 Member
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    Based on my and several friends' experiences, long distance relationships seem much more likely to work if you knew each other before the LDR started. If you've never LIVED real life together (not necessarily sharing a home, just living in the same general area...and anything that can be called a "visit" isn't "real life"), it's hard--if not impossible--to predict what that will be like. Good luck!

    My husband and I didn't Live your "real life" before. Yet we are doing wonderfully. Our experiences and relationship were true and genuine. It depends on the people. Their honesty to each other and their commitment to each other.
  • jenny95662
    jenny95662 Posts: 997 Member
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    my husband is in the military and we had to do the long distance thing at one point it works if you both are committed, its never easy per say but it will be in the end :)

    Edit to say i have a friend who was long distance for a good 3 years and now married and spending there life together so it can happen.
  • NCLx8319xLDM
    NCLx8319xLDM Posts: 2
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    Yes, they do...

    : ))
    ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY WITHOUT A DOUBT THEY WORK....if ur serious about ur relationship and u trust one another, i honestly do believe that it is possible....me and lindsay r doing GREAT!!!!!!! :-)
  • hesn92
    hesn92 Posts: 5,967 Member
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    I don't think it would work very well for me. I really hate talking on the phone.... my boyfriend now lives about 30 minutes away so I only see him maybe 2 days a week so the other 5 days a week we just talk on the phone and I just hate it! LOL I wish I could be with him every day.
  • intoxicnt
    intoxicnt Posts: 12 Member
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    I've seen ones that work, and ones (many) that haven't. It comes down to the people and how much blood, sweat, and tears they are willing to give to make an already stressful relationship work.

    Personally I've done long distance relationships for years (California-Connecticut) it sucked. A lot. And then we were able to go to the same college, move in together, and are getting married next year after being together for 6 years. It takes a lot, but they will work if both people care enough to make it work.
  • SaiLex15
    SaiLex15 Posts: 24 Member
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    Yes.. 6 years and a half and going STRONG. We're definitely STILL inlove. Now, he's working outside the country and I'll get to see him this December. I miss him and I won't give up. It's hard but LDR is a fulfilling relationship.
  • SaiLex15
    SaiLex15 Posts: 24 Member
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    Based on my and several friends' experiences, long distance relationships seem much more likely to work if you knew each other before the LDR started. If you've never LIVED real life together (not necessarily sharing a home, just living in the same general area...and anything that can be called a "visit" isn't "real life"), it's hard--if not impossible--to predict what that will be like. Good luck!

    My husband and I didn't Live your "real life" before. Yet we are doing wonderfully. Our experiences and relationship were true and genuine. It depends on the people. Their honesty to each other and their commitment to each other.


    It really depends on the couple. Yet, I've tried that "real life" and honestly there are new petty fights that didn't happen before. We worked it out and everything else out there. Now, he's out of the country to make a living. Survived LDR before, survived Short-distance-relationship, but the LDR after a short term SDR -LDR kind is much difficult. I miss him so bad..
  • HorrorChix89
    HorrorChix89 Posts: 1,229 Member
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    not sure how this has anything to do with fitness but no! they defs do not work

    ^^this...minus the fitness thing
  • aprilabrao
    aprilabrao Posts: 7 Member
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    I don't believe they work for long term I've had 2 of them and they never worked out and now I'm watching my brother try and make one work ANC after over a year it's not going so well , it gets very wearing on a person so unless you can get together after a year of a long distance relationship then go for it it it going to be longer I suggest give him an ultimatum or move on cause your wasting your time and energy .

    From experience,
    April
  • yoouperh
    yoouperh Posts: 68 Member
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    What I will speak to is not the long distance relationship, but the relationship of coming together after being long distance. A long distance relationship is all the benefits and feelings of an up close relationship with all the excitement of a new relationship every time you see the person. There has to be a great deal of trust and respect. But the long distance isn't really the hard part. The hard part is when you move in together after months or years of being apart. Those rushes of feelings start to fade when you see the person every day, and you start to learn more about the person, things you can't learn over a week or two week long visit. That integration period is so hard, and is the test of the relationship, more so than the long distance factor.
    Good Luck to you:)
  • MogwaisGrandma
    MogwaisGrandma Posts: 196 Member
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    Yes they can work

    Not they cannot work.

    Either way it is your commitment to the relationship and to ensure you are getting the best out of it which will prove the success or downfall.

    I do believe in them working. I have seen it a few times.

    All the best in the future
  • kdc0587
    kdc0587 Posts: 166 Member
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    "has anyone else been in a long distance relationship and are you still with that person? " <--- Yes & they DO work. If two people really want to be together, there's no distance, no miles, that can separate them. However, some people will say no they don't work because you have to be physically close/together in order to be in a REAL relationship. You do not have to be physically close/together always in order to be in a relationship. A relationship is not just based on physical closeness. It's much much more than. All relationships take trust/faith/commitment. But trust me, a LDR takes A LOT more trust, faith, & commitment than your average relationship. By not being able to see that person whenever you want, it makes the time you DO get to see them & spend with them that much more special. Sure, you can say you trust your lover, but you never REALLY know until you're not able to see them as much as you want. To me, the ONLY reason they don't work out is from lack of trust/commitment from one or both people. It's not the lack of seeing each other, or what-have-you that kills a LDR. LDRs require more input & risks than your average relationship, thus making them beautiful. I'm not saying I prefer a LDR over a average relationship, but I'm saying there's more effort, commitment, trust, faith, & romance, more love in a LDR. LDRs makes that time of dates and seeing each other and being together that much more special. If two people really want to be with each other, love will find it's way rather it be miles apart or next door. LDRs are not for everyone & not everyone sees it they way I just stated, & that's okay.......& this is just my opinion on LDRs & answering the question :)
    My love & I have been together a little over 8 months. I live in South Carolina & he lives in Michigan.
  • saustin201
    saustin201 Posts: 270 Member
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    My hubby and I have been together for almost 20 years. We met in college. He graduated and went off to Boston for grad school. I stayed back in the midwest to finish up my bachelors and then go onto grad school. We were separated for 1 year. We were not married at that time, but had been together for 5 years. We're now married and have 3 boys.

    Long distance relationships can work. I know many couples who survive and go on to get married, but there are challenges too.

    Good luck.
  • EchoOfYourPast
    EchoOfYourPast Posts: 459 Member
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    Myself no...my daughter met her husband in the military...she is in the Navy and he was in the Marines......the first year of their marriage she was in WV and he was in Hawaii....they were finally stationed together and have been married for almost 3 years...they are expecting their first baby in Oct (my 1st grandbaby!! Yeah!)
    They are very happy now and stayed dedicated to one another the entire time they were separated.
    San :)
  • TeachTheGirl
    TeachTheGirl Posts: 2,091 Member
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    Me: Bristol, UK.
    Husband: Minnesota, USA.

    We dated for three years long distance before we got married. We've now been married seven years with two beautiful children.

    Add me if you need extra reassurance. =) It CAN work.
  • HMonsterX
    HMonsterX Posts: 3,000 Member
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    Highly unlikely. It all depends if both are being 100% honest. I know mine wasn't.

    If it seems too good to be true, it is. Mine was.
  • chocolateandvodka
    chocolateandvodka Posts: 1,856 Member
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    Can they? Sure. In theory...

    For me? unlikely. Unless monogamy was a non-issue. I'd want to talk to him/her often, but I don't know if I could commit to being monogamous with a partner I only see once a month or less. At least not without a deep enough connection and history. Even then... it'd be a challenge for me.

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