Is total abstention easier than moderation?

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  • SingerJennXXXX
    SingerJennXXXX Posts: 54
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    It depends on the "treat". If it's ice cream or chocolate, I'm an abstainer. If it's chips, I can moderate. I love snack foods and if I indulge in something crunchy, I am able to portion out a serving and I'm satisfied without feeling out of control.
  • jaharrison763
    jaharrison763 Posts: 99 Member
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    I can eat anything in moderation 75% of the time. The other 25% of the time, not so much. lol! I don't get my period any more :happy: , but I think I'm still on a hormonal cycle where I crave certain foods and I'm not satisfied until I eat them! The good thing is that the cravings are short lived.
  • Duck_Puddle
    Duck_Puddle Posts: 3,224 Member
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    I think it depends on how you're defining moderation. Moderation doesn't have to mean scheduling a certain amount or frequency-so just because you don't fully abstain from something doesn't mean your only other option is to somehow schedule yourself an allowance of sorts. To me-that's essentially the same idea. You're either restricting consumption to zero or your restricting consumption to some other arbitrary number. To me, you're still restricting.

    If I really, really loved frozen yogurt enough to eat it 3 times a day-then I'd find a way to allow myself frozen yogurt 3 times a day. Meaning, I'd cut down other meals/snacks and/or burn more calories through exercise. I'd soon become weary of that and eventually decide that I'd rather not run 6 extra miles a day to fuel my frozen yogurt habit-or I'd find that having just carrot sticks for lunch sucks, and I'd be willing to cut out a frozen yogurt or two so I could eat some actual food. That is the approach I have taken for me. I've eventually eliminated a lot of crap from my diet by not abstaining-and if I get the urge to eat some crap-I do (and I fit it in). Over time-this has just naturally happened for me-but I will never restrict myself (either completely or in some arbitrarily determined "schedule") from eating anything I find tasty.
  • PeachyPlum
    PeachyPlum Posts: 1,243 Member
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    For me, I'm better off abstaining. I don't have the willpower to eat just one cookie out of the bag, I'm just not there. If they are in the house, at some point, I'm going to pig out on cookies.

    I DO have the willpower to leave the cookies on the shelf at the grocery store.

    I think about it kind of like an alcoholic. Nobody (except morons) expects an alcoholic to have one drink at dinner, and then stop. We accept and encourage the fact that they choose restaurants that don't even serve alcohol, to avoid the temptation.

    So why do we think someone who avoids junk food altogether is weak?
  • littlepinkhearts
    littlepinkhearts Posts: 1,055 Member
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    So why do we think someone who avoids junk food altogether is weak?

    I for one don't believe someone who avoids junk food altogether is weak. The less I have in my life, the happier I am with myself, because it means I have more calories left for good food.
  • MtnKat
    MtnKat Posts: 714
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    Can you imagine trying to quit smoking like that? LOL.....there is NO moderation.....

    I'm an abstainer too....if I try to do things in moderation, I fail because I stop caring and tell myself "well, one more piece won't hurt".
  • BronnersHarris
    BronnersHarris Posts: 247 Member
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    Abstainer here. I stopped eating dairy just so I couldn't eat chocolate. Worked really well and managed it for a few months but found it too difficult with eating meals with others to keep it up. I now don't eat as much as I used to (sometimes a whole block a night!)
  • pants77
    pants77 Posts: 185 Member
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    Can you imagine trying to quit smoking like that? LOL.....there is NO moderation.....

    I'm an abstainer too....if I try to do things in moderation, I fail because I stop caring and tell myself "well, one more piece won't hurt".

    The key difference there being, you have to ingest food in order to live. It's not like all people have to smoke SOMETHING, and tobacco is the most unhealthy option. You can abstain from smoking - you can't abstain from eating.

    Each of us has to make the choice of what we put in our bodies for sustenance, dozens and dozens of times each day. Literally every bite or sip we take is a choice.
  • londoneye
    londoneye Posts: 192 Member
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    Most people simply don't have the self-control to completely deny themselves all of the unhealthy delicious foods they love. We can hold on for a certain amount of time but the rubber band eventually snaps and a binge results.

    For some people, I'm sure abstention is easier. I am of the opinion that those lucky folks are the minority.

    Lucky?! I'd give anything to be able to do moderation! Oh! To be able to buy a jar of Nutella and just have a serving once a week or so! A dream!
  • sashoye
    sashoye Posts: 4 Member
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    Abstain if you do not have the will power. Enjoy what you like in moderation if you want to enjoy life! Moderation I think is easier for most people. That is why people loose weight on weight watchers and all those diets because they are still able to have a taste of most of their favourite foods without over doing it. I love cake. Cake is my downfall and chicken and ice, but these days I have learned to eat less of these foods. so I still have rice two days out of seven but i pile a load of steam cabbage at the bottom and the rice on top and I guess trick myself....... well not really, I know its less but I enjoy eating less of what helped to get me to the point where I am dissatisfied with my physical appearance.

    Its all about what you want to achieve at the end of the day and how quickly you want to get to that goal weight. if abstinence gets you there then go for it. if having things in moderation keeps you from falling off the wagon do it!!
  • londoneye
    londoneye Posts: 192 Member
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    Thanks to the OP for posting the article....think I have actually learned something about myself haha. Not that I didn't already know that i'm a true abstainer...but just never really thought about it before :flowerforyou:

    You're welcome! The great thing about the article is that it reminds us that one way isn't necessarily better than the other. The key is to know which you are and work with it! (PS: even as an 'abstainer' this tends to mean I will abstain from buying certain things or keeping them in my house on a day to day basis. When visiting friends, travelling, or on 'special' days, I will happily indulge guilt-free!)
  • FlyEaglesGuy
    FlyEaglesGuy Posts: 436 Member
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    I need moderation. Otherwise when I don't see immediate results I get discouraged and ask myself is this really worth it.

    Portion control works better for me
  • KristenEvans77
    KristenEvans77 Posts: 14 Member
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    I feel like moderation is the key. When you cut everything out, you are depriving yourself and that will just make the fall harder and worse if you do fall. We have done well with exercising at least 5 days a week, sometimes 6 and logging calories.
    Just hang in there and don't beat yourself up for eating things you like!
  • Corrie_Lynn
    Corrie_Lynn Posts: 53 Member
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    It depends on what it is. I can easily put certain things (like chips) in a small bowl and be satisfied with eating just that amount. Other things (chocolate, for example) I can't even have in the house, because I WILL eat it, and not in moderation either. I don't think there's really a general rule for this, I think it changes from person to person and from item to item.
  • wasveganvictoria88
    wasveganvictoria88 Posts: 249 Member
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    I buy things that come in induvidual packets or else I eat the whole lot - small packets are fine...large packets not so!
  • LizHR
    LizHR Posts: 16 Member
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    Depends on the food for me. I'm a bit of a dairy queen. So I seldom eat bread, muffins or crumpets as I'll just slather them in butter and eat 4 slices in one sitting. It's the butter that's the killer. Cheese - I have to abstain. If I buy a piece of one I like it'll be eaten same day.

    Chocolate I try to abstain in that I try not to buy it. But when I do give in to the urge, I moderate by buying a really small bar of good quality stuff - as it will be eaten in one go, I never can have some just sitting in the cupboard.

    With certain 'junk' food I have a different approach. So if I crave a hamburger I'll make it from scratch at home with fresh organic meat and good quality wholemeal buns. Fish & chips are restaurant only and very infrequent. While pizza is reserved for ocasional eating out at proper Italian restaurants or when I get to go to Italy and just think 'life's too short'.

    Whereas things like wine I'm much better - I can have one glass and that's enough, and an open bottle can sit there for days not tempting me at all. Even desserts, biscuits (cookies to you Americans) or cake can stay uneaten for decent lengths of time. But not cheese....strange.
  • hopeandlove91
    hopeandlove91 Posts: 40 Member
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    I am a moderator. I know that if I tell myself that I can't have certain foods that I will quit. I need to be able live my life in a way I always have. For example, if a friends calls to ask me if I want to go out for ice cream I can. If my husband wants to have a treat I want to be able to enjoy one with him. With that being said I do not indulge in treats too often and try to choose treats that are a little less "naughty".
  • Bob314159
    Bob314159 Posts: 1,178 Member
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    I'm addicted to cheese, chocolate and coffee yogurt. I've gone through periods of total abstinence for several weeks and its easier then cutting down. Right now I'm trying self control, I've cut down some on the cheese, but still having too much. For some reason I now like dark chocolate better than milk and that's totally in control by leaving the bar next to the computer so I log eating a piece at a time, rather than a whole bar. Coffee yogurt - I'm eating half what I did a month ago - but I should have it almost never.

    In the long run self-control is much better - it lets you deal with eating out, parties, weddings in a more adult fashion.
  • Davis1818
    Davis1818 Posts: 22 Member
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    I cannot have even a tiny bit of sugar or I go off the rails.
  • LiddyBit
    LiddyBit Posts: 447 Member
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    I'm definitely an abstainer. My entire personality, in all aspects of my life, is pretty much "all-or-nothing."

    Also, I resent the implication that abstainers simply lack will power. It's just a different personality type, not a failing. One could argue along similar lines that moderators are just passionless people. It wouldn't be a very fair assessment of a moderator personality, just like saying abstainers have no self control is equally as unfair.

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