How tacky is this? Vow Renewal / Giant Party

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Replies

  • StarvingDiva
    StarvingDiva Posts: 1,107 Member
    I think it sounds lovely. Especially now that your daughter is feeling better.
  • Tori_356
    Tori_356 Posts: 510 Member
    Not tacky. Do it. You deserve it, sounds like you have made some major sacrifices....and if your friends/family know you, they will be happy to spend your special day with you. DO IT!
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    Quick Background :

    Hubby and I were supposed to get married in February 2007. Three weeks beffore the wedding, our daughter needed emergency heart surgery. We canceled the wedding with just 2 weeks to go. We didn't want to get married if she was dead, dying, or in the hospital. A few weeks later, we had a quickie no-guests-legal marriage. No one sent gifts or checks. We didn't register anywhere. We told everyone we'd have the reception during the summer.

    Almost five years have gone by - for a long time, our daughter was too sick for us to think about throwing a party. People are STILL asking us when we get to have our " wedding ". Now that our anniversary is approaching, we have been thinking about doing a vow renewal / giant party.... basically a night of dinner and dancing.

    No wedding dress. No wedding party. No gifts. Just a 10 minute " ceremony " where we exchange public vows, then a fancy, formal dinner & dancing, degenerating into drunken splendor.

    Someone told me that it's tacky to have any sort of anniversary party, reception, vow renewal, etc. We aren't doing this as a re-do. We aren't asking for gifts. All we are asking is that our friends / family get to celebrate with us.

    Thoughts?

    I think that friend sounds like an *kitten* clown. People celebrate anniversaries and share their vow renewals all the time. My BFF had a quicky jp wedding 10 years ago. She's excited for her vow renewal when she gets to walk down the aisle in her dress.
  • donna_do_good
    donna_do_good Posts: 161
    I think its sweet, sounds like fun and by the sounds of it people want to celebrate your day.

    I think if you feel like you missed out the first time on the dress etc you should do it the full works any really enjoy it.
  • WifeNMama
    WifeNMama Posts: 2,876 Member
    My wedding gift to you:

    Step 1: Stop giving a *kitten* what people think.
    Step 2: Repeat Step 1.

    Now go party.

    Somehow, I knew this was a post from you. Probably because it's the same thing you've posted on every thread I've seen you on. Maybe you should write a book with this being the thesis, maybe make some money off of it.

    I'm having it printed on t-shirts. And my left butt cheek.

    Somehow, I don't think you want your butt to stop giving a s***."
  • AriesGrl
    AriesGrl Posts: 174 Member
    That is sooo not tacky!! You deserve it...hubby and I are doing a vow renewal for our 10th anniversary just so we can have some skinny wedding type pics...lol...now thats tacky....hahaha
  • Sarahmeridith
    Sarahmeridith Posts: 298 Member
    I dont think its tacky at all. I think it would be great! My husband andI eloped and I fully plan on one day having a public vow renewal partym it would only betacky if you expected gifts =)
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    I'd just call it an anniversary party and then surprise everyone with the vow renewal. That way, you can tell everyone not to bring gifts--just a note in the invitations that says something to the effect of : Please, no gifts. Your company on our anniversary *is* your gift to us!

    Btw, congrats and have a wonderful time!

    Great idea!
  • caiialily
    caiialily Posts: 28
    How anyone could ever think that a celebration of love/marriage/family is tacky is beyond me. Go for it! I think it is a beautiful idea and after all you've been through, you deserve to have a party! Go ahead and enjoy your vow renewal and if I were you, I wouldn't even invite whoever made you doubt having it. But definitely show them the photos of all the fun they missed out on...
  • Scubanana7
    Scubanana7 Posts: 361 Member
    I'd get a wedding dress...maybe not the princess type...but you DESERVE A WEDDING, reception, party, celebrating your happiness! DO WHATEVER MAKES YOU HAPPY. DO IT SMALL, DO IT BIG...BUT DO IT FOR YOU TWO.

    As for the person who thought it was tacky.....don't believe I'd invite them.
  • theartichoke
    theartichoke Posts: 816 Member
    If all the person who said it's "tacky" gets is not invited, they should consider themselves lucky.

    Enjoy your special day. You deserve to celebrate, for many reasons! All the best to you and your family!
  • BigDaddyBRC
    BigDaddyBRC Posts: 2,395 Member
    Why does it matter to you what another thinks? If you want to celebrate, then celebrate my existance. I coul care less what they think.




    EDIT: Apparently, my laptop does not like getting stroked quickly
  • Krissy366
    Krissy366 Posts: 458 Member
    I think it sounds lovely. Nothing wrong with an anniversary party. And if you choose to renew your vows while your friends and family are there, I'm sure they will love it. I hope you all enjoy it. And there are all types of wedding dresses - you might feel silly going all Cinderella because you are already married, but you can get something wedding dress-ish that is more understated and still appropriate for the occasion.
  • deaddawn
    deaddawn Posts: 42 Member
    Just for curiousity sake, I just looked up vow renewal ettiquette. Your friend is wrong. It's not tacky; especially in your case. If you are worried about being tacky, look up vow renewal ettiquette. What you described is within the non-tacky zone. Your friend doesn't have to come if he or she doesn't want to. You're having a party and someone is trying to talk you out of it? What's up with that?

    I wish you happiness and your daughter good health and a long life!
  • ForeverIrish
    ForeverIrish Posts: 227 Member
    Quick Background :

    Hubby and I were supposed to get married in February 2007. Three weeks beffore the wedding, our daughter needed emergency heart surgery. We canceled the wedding with just 2 weeks to go. We didn't want to get married if she was dead, dying, or in the hospital. A few weeks later, we had a quickie no-guests-legal marriage. No one sent gifts or checks. We didn't register anywhere. We told everyone we'd have the reception during the summer.

    Almost five years have gone by - for a long time, our daughter was too sick for us to think about throwing a party. People are STILL asking us when we get to have our " wedding ". Now that our anniversary is approaching, we have been thinking about doing a vow renewal / giant party.... basically a night of dinner and dancing.

    No wedding dress. No wedding party. No gifts. Just a 10 minute " ceremony " where we exchange public vows, then a fancy, formal dinner & dancing, degenerating into drunken splendor.

    Someone told me that it's tacky to have any sort of anniversary party, reception, vow renewal, etc. We aren't doing this as a re-do. We aren't asking for gifts. All we are asking is that our friends / family get to celebrate with us.

    Thoughts?

    My wedding gift to you:

    Step 1: Stop giving a *kitten* what people think.
    Step 2: Repeat Step 1.

    Now go party.

    _________________________

    This man is a genius. Do as he says and have the time of your lives.
  • mooglysmom
    mooglysmom Posts: 319 Member
    Not tacky at all! I'd LOVE to have a vow renewal/anniversary party with my husband! This year is our 10th anniversary, and we were going to head to Vegas (where we honeymooned) and do a quickie Vegas chapel vow renewal for fun :). And I fully intend on throwing a big 25th anniversary for my Dad & Stepmom in 2 years (shhhhh!!). It sounds like you certainly deserve to have a big party and celebrate with your family and friends if that's what you want to do!!
  • rhonniema
    rhonniema Posts: 522 Member
    Not tacky at all.
    That someone is just jealous!
  • supplemama
    supplemama Posts: 1,956 Member
    Not tacky at all. Whoever told you that is probably just jealous. Like, is this person even married?
  • mikeyboy
    mikeyboy Posts: 1,057 Member
    Quick Background :

    Hubby and I were supposed to get married in February 2007. Three weeks beffore the wedding, our daughter needed emergency heart surgery. We canceled the wedding with just 2 weeks to go. We didn't want to get married if she was dead, dying, or in the hospital. A few weeks later, we had a quickie no-guests-legal marriage. No one sent gifts or checks. We didn't register anywhere. We told everyone we'd have the reception during the summer.

    Almost five years have gone by - for a long time, our daughter was too sick for us to think about throwing a party. People are STILL asking us when we get to have our " wedding ". Now that our anniversary is approaching, we have been thinking about doing a vow renewal / giant party.... basically a night of dinner and dancing.

    No wedding dress. No wedding party. No gifts. Just a 10 minute " ceremony " where we exchange public vows, then a fancy, formal dinner & dancing, degenerating into drunken splendor.

    Someone told me that it's tacky to have any sort of anniversary party, reception, vow renewal, etc. We aren't doing this as a re-do. We aren't asking for gifts. All we are asking is that our friends / family get to celebrate with us.

    Thoughts?

    My thoughts......
    Anything that degenerates into a drunken splender is not tacky... it's a great time....rock on!
    Oh and the people that think it is tacky... they can sit their @sses at home! Good luck & congrats!
  • Helenatrandom
    Helenatrandom Posts: 1,166 Member
    TACKY? WHAT? Many people renew their vows and have anniversary parties. Have the renewal, have the party, and anyone who thinks it's "tacky" may decline the invitation!

    CONGRATULATIONS! :flowerforyou: I hope you have a lovely ceremony and party, and many happy years together!
  • jessicataylor2
    jessicataylor2 Posts: 150
    I don't find it tacky at all! I find vow renewals very romantic and a way to show that you still love each other just as much, if not more, than you did when you were originally married. And especially since you guys never had the chance to celebrate your marriage with friends and family like most do. I think it's a great idea. Congrats on the anniversary and don't let what ignorant, jealous people have to say about what you want to do affect your choices :)
  • suerun11
    suerun11 Posts: 136 Member
    I have been to 3 of these, to me they are almost in a way more special then a wedding because the couple has already done for better AND WORSE then still chooses to love each other publicly! WONDERFUL IDEA")
  • ahadj
    ahadj Posts: 257 Member
    As long as you don't wear a poufy white dress, it's not tacky and in fact, you deserve it.
  • Mrs16
    Mrs16 Posts: 86
    A wonderful idea! Enjoy yourselves!!!!
  • cristaine
    cristaine Posts: 87
    Nah, why would wanting to finally celebrate something that is important to you both be tacky? Tacky, in my opinion, is suggesting that it would be so, actually.

    Celebrate your life the way you want without care to how other people interpret it. Even IF you wanted a big dress, a big attitude, a big party and a big scene =) Who cares? And if they do, WHY?!

    Life is short, enjoy it =)
  • Pocket_Pixi
    Pocket_Pixi Posts: 1,167 Member
    I think this is a great idea, you are not asking for anything but their presence to enjoy a special evening with you and your husband. I say go for it and enjoy every minute.
  • beckylawrence70
    beckylawrence70 Posts: 752 Member
    I think it's an awesome idea, love the fact you don't want gifts and such, that would be tacky........
  • L_amore
    L_amore Posts: 52 Member
    Who cares what anyone thinks. Your not doing it for them, your doing it for you and your family. And whoever thinks it's tacky, well don't invite them, their loss, not yours. Now get your wedding done with your true friends and family that support you! And forget about the negative nancy's, because half the time their just jealous... so do your thing girl! And don't let anyone change your mind! :)
  • BettyIW
    BettyIW Posts: 103
    There comes a time in one's life where you just need to say, 'Screw what other people think! Who cares what they think.?' Celebrate your life, your marriage, your family as you desire. Don't give 'them' so much power in your life. Who are 'they' to have so much power in your life?
  • Mceastes
    Mceastes Posts: 303 Member
    Considering the reason you weren't able to have a traditional wedding in the first place, I'm surprised someone would be rude enough to call you tacky for wanting to have a second chance to do it the way you want it. If you were one of my friends or relatives I would absolutely encourage you to do it and would be super happy for you that your daughter is ok and you guys are able to do this now. I think it's totally fine to just put "Please, no gifts" on the invitations as others have suggested. But don't feel like you have to apologize for this event, you guys deserve it as much as any other couple. I'm sure it will mean a lot to your friends and family as well as you, your husband and your daughter to see you have the wedding any bride would want. Enjoy your special day!! :drinker:

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