To call/text him or not to call/text....

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  • confettibetti
    confettibetti Posts: 405 Member
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    Hmmm my first instinct is that you should apologize for being so crass with your response. He may have Irresponsible for not holding up his end of the race bargain but you totally disrespected him. I wouldn't call you back either. Sorry

    Thanks, I appreciate your honesty. I knew heat of the moment it seemed like a great idea. But yeah, been thinking probably bad idea.

    Sorry, I do agree with this, but I also agree that he should have called or texted or something if he wasn't going to make it...
  • infamousmk
    infamousmk Posts: 6,033 Member
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    I don't think you should call or text. You should probably start looking for a new guy to date that you're not off-and-on with... because that's just no way to live your life.


    I'm also willing to bet this isn't the first time he's blown you off and let you down.
  • Tropical_Turtle
    Tropical_Turtle Posts: 2,236 Member
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    all I would say to this is .......... NEXT!
  • chelseafxx
    chelseafxx Posts: 251 Member
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    Don't call or text. I've been in a similar on/off situation with my ex boyfriend and once I finally just stopped talking to him and let it go it got so much easier and I've been so happy ever since because I finally got him out and focused on me. Just do you girl you don't need a guy right now especially an unreliable one
  • Miss_dannii
    Miss_dannii Posts: 1,351 Member
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    No hun, honestly don't call him. He's a fool and he has let you down here bigtime. Don't call him. I'd like to say to move on from him but I know it's probably not as easy as that. But he doesn't seem to care enough.. and by your short story I can even tell where his priorities lie...
    xx

    Oh, and I think NO apology is needed for your text. No way. The ball is in his court for apologies, you don't apologise for that first..
  • Danardeener
    Danardeener Posts: 255
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    Get rid of him...don't look back! He doesn't deserve you.

    There are plenty of other guys out there who will treat you like you deserve to be treated.
  • chrishgt4
    chrishgt4 Posts: 1,222 Member
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    She has EVERY right to be angry!

    Yes she does.

    How she then chooses to react to that anger is what we are discussing.


    AND from someone who has been in the same shoes as she is....sometimes (A LOT OF TIMES), you have to get vulgar and mad and say "EF U" to finally get yourself to realize that you don't need this toxicity in your life!

    Which is where we disagree.

    Sometimes you can't help feeling angry, or let down, or hurt, or vulnerable. We are human beings not robots right? However, how you choose to channel those negative emotions, and the actions it causes you to take does not need to result in vulgarity. It can be used to empower you in a positive way. You flip it over. You can say "*kitten* you" or you can simply move on with your life without the need for retaliation.

    Living well is the best revenge.

    See, I think she dealt with it in a great way.

    She could have started name calling and telling him what she thought, this that and the other.

    In reality she just told him to do one.

    I think perhaps from what I've seen, in America you guys are a little more sensitive to swearing so maybe what I am reading into F you, is actually on a par with "go away" in america. I don't know, but I do know that I think she's ended it perfectly well. You can only put up with a finite of crap from people before you have to tell them to **** off.

    She should stand by it.
  • sjmgde
    sjmgde Posts: 381 Member
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    I say next....but i know that is easier said than done. I had one of those once a looooooooong time go and alls it ended up doing was causing me hearthbreak. Good luck to you
  • YaBoiMUGS
    YaBoiMUGS Posts: 237
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    If an off-and-on chick tells me to f**k myself, I'm a go hit up my other shorty until she calms down. Then we can be on again. But that's just me.
  • semeyer
    semeyer Posts: 282 Member
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    If he cant understand that you were upset because he was irresponsible, then there is no point in who communicates first. You paid for the race, you offerred to help with transport, and you even provided wake up service. This guy has it made with you and he probably knows it.

    Unless you like that kind of treatment, don't bother reaching out.

    This. By now he prob has this figured out. On again of again means that you will be back, and most likely, he can get away with this behavior. If I was you, and I'm not so you don't have to listen to me, I would ask yourself if this relationship is really making you happy? Or do you find yourself wanting to send those F*** You texts a lot...
  • PHATmommy68
    PHATmommy68 Posts: 112
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    If an off-and-on chick tells me to f**k myself, I'm a go hit up my other shorty until she calms down. Then we can be on again. But that's just me.

    I'm guessing you've been told to "EF off" a number of times!
  • lizziebeth1028
    lizziebeth1028 Posts: 3,602 Member
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    Red Flags! Red Alert! Honey what are you thinking??!! Hellooooo...Bad man!! Barring the fact that maybe he's lying in a ditch dead somewhere........he has no excuse for disrespecting you like that! I mean really, get a backbone!! This is a toxic relationship. And while your messing around with it for how many years?!?!??!?!? ...mister right is going unnoticed. You could be in a mature respectful relationship with someone who will not take you for granted and vice versa!!! Take it from someone who has been down that road before life is too short and too precious to waste on someone who is going to treat you so disrespectfully!!!

    This is one of my favorite quotes. "Don't make someone a priority in your life when you're only an option in theirs."

    And no....you DO NOT owe him an apology. **** him is right!!!

    Grow a pair girl!
  • YaBoiMUGS
    YaBoiMUGS Posts: 237
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    If an off-and-on chick tells me to f**k myself, I'm a go hit up my other shorty until she calms down. Then we can be on again. But that's just me.

    I'm guessing you've been told to "EF off" a number of times!

    Yup, but that was their fault. If I tell a girl all I want is a sexual relationship, don't get mad when you realize that I was serious. That's your fault. I told you ahead of time. Don't try to change me.
  • BigDaddyBRC
    BigDaddyBRC Posts: 2,395 Member
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    Simple solutions...

    Drop him like wood to a fire. Then date me. Just know you get to travel lots and experience total awesomeness
  • gaspass
    gaspass Posts: 1
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    Don't even think twice about this guy. Most of your responses are from women on here, but the guys also are saying run! When you are in you "off times" with him, are you waiting for him or looking for someone else? Is he the one that always comes back when he doesn't have another option? Just think back to all the times you have gotten back together. Is it because he had no one else at the time and you easily accept him back? Did he go home with someone else the night before the race?

    No one, guy or girl, is worth this. Do not apologize. You really should move on and find someone that treats you with respect. There are a lot of nice guys out there. Next time he comes running back, say NO. By the looks of your picture you are about my son's age. I would hope he would not put up with this if the situation was reversed. You deserve better.
  • va_va_voom
    va_va_voom Posts: 467 Member
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    If an off-and-on chick tells me to f**k myself, I'm a go hit up my other shorty until she calms down. Then we can be on again. But that's just me.

    ^^^As much as reading this makes my skin crawl for all the women out there who put up with guys like this, the man speaks truth.

    Now on to my thoughts - OP, do you want to call/text him or not? I hope the answer is no, honestly. You need to put the on again-off again boyfriend in the past and leave him there. Find it in yourself to have enough self-respect to not allow another guy disrespect you in this way.
  • chrishgt4
    chrishgt4 Posts: 1,222 Member
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    Simple solutions...

    Drop him like wood to a fire. Then date me. Just know you get to travel lots and experience total awesomeness

    dude, someone took a crap in your sandwich...
  • PHATmommy68
    PHATmommy68 Posts: 112
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    If an off-and-on chick tells me to f**k myself, I'm a go hit up my other shorty until she calms down. Then we can be on again. But that's just me.

    I'm guessing you've been told to "EF off" a number of times!

    Yup, but that was their fault. If I tell a girl all I want is a sexual relationship, don't get mad when you realize that I was serious. That's your fault. I told you ahead of time. Don't try to change me.


    Very true but don't make false promises just to get some either!
  • YaBoiMUGS
    YaBoiMUGS Posts: 237
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    If an off-and-on chick tells me to f**k myself, I'm a go hit up my other shorty until she calms down. Then we can be on again. But that's just me.

    I'm guessing you've been told to "EF off" a number of times!

    Yup, but that was their fault. If I tell a girl all I want is a sexual relationship, don't get mad when you realize that I was serious. That's your fault. I told you ahead of time. Don't try to change me.


    Very true but don't make false promises just to get some either!

    I never have, never will. I keep it real.

    I'm just keepin' it real with the original poster too. The description of your relationship dictates his behavior. Your off-and-on, so are you really surprised this happened?
  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
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    I think he's trying to give you a big "hint, hint" that you shouldn't rely on him and you should move on.

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