Unsupportive Spouse

My husband was very unsupportive. He'd gripe & complain anytime I wanted to workout, and would sabotage my eating habits. Much the same as you're describing. He would make me feel guilty for exercising for 30 MINUTES a day and would imply that I was "taking time away from my kids" and not being a great mother because of it, etc.

I divorced him.

OMG this made me laugh.
I'm glad you were strong enough to do what was right for yourself and your children.
Well done.

Getting healthy and fit and losing weight takes time and dedication. My spouse was supportive in the beginning, but the more I lost and the more I got "into" running and working out, the moer he would guilt me for not spending time with him.

Understand, for the first 8 years of our marriage, everything I did was FOR him and ABOUT him....now, all of a sudden, I was doing for me and he wasn't getting the attention he'd grown accustomed to. I tried to compromise, to spend more time watching movies with him, baking with him, I cooked what HE wanted for dinner, regardless of whether it was healthy or not. Because of that, I gained back almost all of the weight I'd lost.

We then tried therapy, but I couldn't make him understand that I was doing this for ME because I was unhappy and that I wanted his support.

In the end, I left.......I couldn't stay in that situation because I'd have caved and done what he wanted and that would have put me right back at 250 pounds, depressed and feeling like s***.

Now, a year after I left, I've completed a half marathon, joined a running club, I'm down 90 pounds all told and I'm fitter, happier and healthier than I've ever been and I'm surrounded by friends who love and support me in everything that I set out to do.

i haven't had time to read through all of the comments, but i'm commenting now and will come back later.

OP, i'm having a "similar" issue. my husband (bless his heart) doesn't like hearing about my weight loss or my workouts or diet. how do i know? he told me so. anyhow, i've decided that i will not talk to him about any of it unless he asks (like when i went to the nutritionist and he asked how it went). he's not into working out the same way i am. a friend asked if he was a little uncomfortable with my weight loss because he thinks i may try to "stray". i sure as hell hope not because if that's the case he's a complete moron. LOL i love that man more than is probably humanly possible. i'm his #1 fan and i try to let him know that every day. even if they act like the most confident person, most people have insecurities. it's possible that he's a bit insecure and is afraid you changing the way you look means you may change the way you feel about him. just my thoughts for now until i can continue to read through posts.

Getting healthy and fit and losing weight takes time and dedication. My spouse was supportive in the beginning, but the more I lost and the more I got "into" running and working out, the moer he would guilt me for not spending time with him.

Understand, for the first 8 years of our marriage, everything I did was FOR him and ABOUT him....now, all of a sudden, I was doing for me and he wasn't getting the attention he'd grown accustomed to. I tried to compromise, to spend more time watching movies with him, baking with him, I cooked what HE wanted for dinner, regardless of whether it was healthy or not. Because of that, I gained back almost all of the weight I'd lost.

We then tried therapy, but I couldn't make him understand that I was doing this for ME because I was unhappy and that I wanted his support.

In the end, I left.......I couldn't stay in that situation because I'd have caved and done what he wanted and that would have put me right back at 250 pounds, depressed and feeling like s***.

Now, a year after I left, I've completed a half marathon, joined a running club, I'm down 90 pounds all told and I'm fitter, happier and healthier than I've ever been and I'm surrounded by friends who love and support me in everything that I set out to do.

Sounds so much like my situation. I think I lost 12 pounds the first month as soon as I left my husband and I'm sure a lot of that was just because I was under so much less stress being away from him.

At first my husband would roll his eyes when I said i was going to workout or he would want to eat at buffets all the time. But once he saw that regardless of how much grief he gives me i was going to stick to my goal anyway he backed off. Heck he even bought a weight bench for "US"...lol. Just give it time and stick to with it. He'll come around.

I think you guys need to sit down and seriously talk. If he doesn't take you seriously you're going to have to be a hardass and put your foot down. You have the right to eat healthy and workout despite the job,hubby and kids. Its not unreasonable to go for a 30 min job daily. And Im sorry walking the dog as I see it is you handling a family responsibility, not doing something for yourself.

Once he sees that you are happier and you look amazing, he will get used to the fact that you work out. If he doesn't like that you are looking better, then he might have jealousy issues.

:mad: You need to take the time to excercise even if you husband doesn't like it; this is about you taking care of you!! I would suggest having a sit down with him to discuss it & see if he is doing this on purpose just in case he doesn't realize what he is doing.:mad:

The following is probably the best advice from a previous poster. I was definitely in that boat but more so with "food" and not exercise. Until one day I just sat him down, and talked to him about my goals and why they are important to me and for us. It took some adjusting for him to comply. He has been great with adjusting our eating habits, even thought at times it consists of preparing two separating meals and we workout together. He motivates me and I motivate him. Communication is the key.

Talk and communicate. Try do to this without losing your temper. Rehearse what you want to say and the questions you want to ask. Understand that he may not open up to you right away. I will usually ask my husband if I can have a few minutes to talk to him without him interrupting me but just listening. I then tell him he doesn't have to talk about it right now - he can have some time to process and then we can talk. Sometimes we talk then and there, sometimes we a talk a little bit then and then in a few days more and sometimes it will be a few days before we talk about it. But the point is it is out in the open and not eating at you as bad and sometimes that is over half the battle. Good Luck:flowerforyou:

My husband was very unsupportive. He'd gripe & complain anytime I wanted to workout, and would sabotage my eating habits. Much the same as you're describing. He would make me feel guilty for exercising for 30 MINUTES a day and would imply that I was "taking time away from my kids" and not being a great mother because of it, etc.

I divorced him.

Ditto, my husband is very unsupportive. He is constantly yelling at me for spending money (even though I'm the bread winner). He is all about himself and doesn't take any consideration into what I do or do for my daughter. I have recently seen a lawyer and am beginning divorce proceedings myself. I'm tired of taking care of 2 children and having to hide anything and everything I do or buy.