Just been told I am too thin

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24

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  • kickers19
    kickers19 Posts: 63 Member
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    I have lost just over 20 lbs, and now my boss nit picks everything about my body. Most recent, I don't have any boobs... Way to ruin my ego.
    If this is true... why, exactly, are you not suing that company out of existence??

    I don't have proof that she is saying anything, so nothing gets done about it...
    She's also called me "white trash" If I lost too much weight, I'd look stupid and too skinny... The list goes on.
  • 50anita
    50anita Posts: 7 Member
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    I have lost just over 20 lbs, and now my boss nit picks everything about my body. Most recent, I don't have any boobs... Way to ruin my ego.

    My reply to his next (her next? - though I can't imagine a female nit picking about a lack of boobs...) unwelcome comment:
    "Wow, that sounds incredibly close to harassment. Surely you didn't mean to express that out loud?"

    OR a simple: Wow. followed by a look of amazement (even though I am sure you're no longer surprised by the insensitive comments). Sometimes a look of incredulity can convey so much!

    Hang in there. YOU know you are doing what is right by your body. I knew a friend of my mom who claimed she didn't want to lose weight b/c she'd lose it in the bust line. How sad. I want to be healthy and able to keep up with grandkids (ten or more years in the future - if I am lucky).
  • 50anita
    50anita Posts: 7 Member
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    Oops, missed that last about it being behind your back.
    Obviously motivated by jealousy.
    SAD. Just pity that person. They aren't worth your time.
    And brush up your resume! ;-)
  • Kupe
    Kupe Posts: 758 Member
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    I have lost just over 20 lbs, and now my boss nit picks everything about my body. Most recent, I don't have any boobs... Way to ruin my ego.
    If this is true... why, exactly, are you not suing that company out of existence??

    I don't have proof that she is saying anything, so nothing gets done about it...
    She's also called me "white trash" If I lost too much weight, I'd look stupid and too skinny... The list goes on.

    If you got a phone which is able to record. Then I suggest you record some of her statements and also make notes of them in a document that is inaccessible to any one but you. Once you have a few of this statements take it to HR. If they don't do anything about it, take the complaint to your local work council.
  • belle_74
    belle_74 Posts: 934 Member
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    I have this problem with elderly relatives, but i think its cos they are seeing how much less of me there is now compared to how much there used to be- I know I still have a bit to lose, and so don't take them seriously. I think it might be partly a shock-thing- they were expecting the same old you maybe!

    Think of it as a compliment! People can see a difference, so you're getting to where you want to be :smile:

    ^^^ This

    If I heard once in the past weekend that I was 'thin' enough now and that I didn't need to lose any more weight from my family and friends I heard it a thousand times. According to my BMI I am still overweight! I have 3lbs to lose to get to a normal BMI but I will will by no means be 'too thin' or 'skinny' then!

    To the people who knew me when I was obese I probably do look thin now but if someone was just meeting me for the first time I am sure that they would describe me as 'chubby'! I am only 5ft 2lbs and I carry what is left of my weight in my tummy and hips so I do still look a little chubby (well roly more than chubby) so they would be right :smile:

    When I point out to my family and friends that say 'I am thin enough now' that I am still carrying a lot of weight on my tummy/ hips and am a moderate risk for diabetes all they say is 'well there is a lot less of it there now than there were last year so you will be fine' ... It's funny the way some people think!

    @larkiedeek : Most likely the people/person who made the comments are jealous of your success and as long as you are happy with what you are doing & how you look then that's all that matters!

    Congratulations on your success so far & I wish you every success in your future!
  • 50anita
    50anita Posts: 7 Member
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    Oops, missed that last about it being behind your back.
    Obviously motivated by jealousy.
    SAD. Just pity that person. She isn't worth your time.
    And brush up your resume! ;-)
  • yvonnej1
    yvonnej1 Posts: 904 Member
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    I've been told a few times that I'm too thin/ can't afford to lose anymore weight etc. It's nearly always been from men. When I was first losing weight it bothered me a bit, but now I've been maintaining for ages I feel secure and confident enough to be able to reply that I am happy with myself the way I am which is all that matters.
  • rextcat
    rextcat Posts: 1,408 Member
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    I have lost just over 20 lbs, and now my boss nit picks everything about my body. Most recent, I don't have any boobs... Way to ruin my ego.
    If this is true... why, exactly, are you not suing that company out of existence??

    I don't have proof that she is saying anything, so nothing gets done about it...
    She's also called me "white trash" If I lost too much weight, I'd look stupid and too skinny... The list goes on.
    record her, if you have a cell phone you can use it or go to walmart and get a cheep *kitten* little pocket recorder
  • kiminor
    kiminor Posts: 38 Member
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    I have lost just over 20 lbs, and now my boss nit picks everything about my body. Most recent, I don't have any boobs... Way to ruin my ego.

    Seriously? That is so unprofessional.
  • mclairch
    mclairch Posts: 4
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    I don't think it's legal for you boss to comment on your body, and certainly not your boobs!!!!
  • avt85
    avt85 Posts: 64
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    I was at a business meeting today and was told I was too skinny. :noway:

    i totally feel for you... I'm 173cms tall, 80kgs, BMI of 26.7 (so still in the overweight range) and my gf now keeps telling me that I am too thin, that my face has gotten uglier, that when she hugs me all she feels is bones and feels disgusting. Which is anything but a total downer.

    I've never felt better in my life, have more energy when I wake up in the morning and enjoy food alot more now than I used to.
    I still have a bit of belly I need to tone but sometimes negative feedback like this with no support just get so depressing, almost had the urge last night when she told me this stuff again to just binge eat myself to 3,000 calories that night. Get myself back to my fat old self just to end the argument altogether, never thought being healthy was so emotionally taxing.

    Here's a few photos of me as of last week against my former 120kg self, up to you to decide whether she is right.

    WeightLoss_Pic1_thumb.jpgWeightLoss_Pic2_thumb.jpg
  • larkiedeek
    larkiedeek Posts: 203 Member
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    Thanks for all the feedback. I'm clearly not alone.

    I'm not expecting praise from anyone. I'm making the changes to improve my health. That's my reward.


    I know the comment was not meant to be negative. It's just made me take another look at things. Is that how people now see me? I've been 20-25 lbs heavier for the last 20 years. There are people on here who inspire me and make changes into the hundreds of pounds. Others take up excersise and run/lift/cycle and achive fantastic results from nothing.

    I still see this as a work in progress and the good people of MFP have got my back!

    Now onwards to my goals. To be too FIT.:glasses:
  • yourenotmine
    yourenotmine Posts: 645 Member
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    I have lost just over 20 lbs, and now my boss nit picks everything about my body. Most recent, I don't have any boobs... Way to ruin my ego.

    Why in HELL would your boss comment, in any way, on your body? I'm not a fan of suing people, but this jerk sounds like he/she deserves it.
  • sbn1966
    sbn1966 Posts: 1 Member
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    Hi people are just haters, I have been working out all of my life, I swim workout at the gym at least 2 hrs every day it just it that people have nothing nice to say. Keep doing what you are doing and dont pay people like that any mind. :smile:
  • jwilllose
    jwilllose Posts: 18 Member
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    I also think it was terribly inappropriate for him to say!

    I've been on the receiving end from my family. I have weighed 30 lbs more than my current weight for about 20 years as well. Now that I've lost it, it throws them off and they think I'm too skinning. But in reality, I'm not. My BMI is 22 and I am FAR from skin and bones or bikini material- but they got used to seeing me one way and now it messes with THEIR idea of normal.

    Oh well- they don't impact how I feel about myself and I know I'm doing right by my body. Keep it up :)
  • ElBo58
    ElBo58 Posts: 44
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    I don't want to go down the whole body size debate but why would someone say that? :frown:


    Because they're a d!ck?
  • stupidloser
    stupidloser Posts: 300 Member
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    That's always better than being told you are too fat.:laugh:
  • Bobby_Clerici
    Bobby_Clerici Posts: 1,828 Member
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    People say what people say, and whatever.
    There is only one vote that counts: YOURS! :drinker:

    True to a point but I know so many people who go too far and become ill with their weight, the obsess over every oz of food they have, and maybe the person saying it has genuine concerns? We dont know the OP< maybe he sat through the meeting telling everyone how he is going to have water and a wafer for dinner and then do a 5 mile run because he ate a grape for breakfast?

    In instances like that I wouldnt trust the person who is dieting to know what is healthy.

    I am not saying that any of this applies to you OP but you have to ask yourself, are they saying it to be *****y and they a jealous of you, which is just as likely to be fair. Or are they your friend and they are worried you might be overdoing it and on the verge of having an illness?

    Like I said I don't presume to know you and I mean no offense.
    And maybe a cow will jump over the moon...
    We don't deal in maybe.
    The OP knows his situation.
    Again, your health and fitness program is not up for vote. Let people say whatever.
    And then just keep doing the next right thing; just KEEP PUNCHING!
  • larkiedeek
    larkiedeek Posts: 203 Member
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    I was at a business meeting today and was told I was too skinny. :noway:

    i totally feel for you... I'm 173cms tall, 80kgs, BMI of 26.7 (so still in the overweight range) and my gf now keeps telling me that I am too thin, that my face has gotten uglier, that when she hugs me all she feels is bones and feels disgusting. Which is anything but a total downer.

    I've never felt better in my life, have more energy when I wake up in the morning and enjoy food alot more now than I used to.
    I still have a bit of belly I need to tone but sometimes negative feedback like this with no support just get so depressing, almost had the urge last night when she told me this stuff again to just binge eat myself to 3,000 calories that night. Get myself back to my fat old self just to end the argument altogether, never thought being healthy was so emotionally taxing.

    Here's a few photos of me as of last week against my former 120kg self, up to you to decide whether she is right.

    WeightLoss_Pic1_thumb.jpgWeightLoss_Pic2_thumb.jpg

    I don't think anyone suggesting you binge on 3000 cals a night is right!

    You and I are exactly the same height and I'm probably about at your goal weight right now but that's just a result of eating clean, giving up chocolate, alcohol and soda.

    If you want to keep going then do it and stay healthy.
  • Bobby_Clerici
    Bobby_Clerici Posts: 1,828 Member
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    I'm willing to bet they're just saying that because they're jealous of their fat stomachs. You should feel awesome for doing something they wish they could do.

    People only ever insult other people to boost their own self esteem.
    ^^^^^^^^^
    BINGO!
    You hit the nail on the head.

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