Little Kids Telling You That You Are Fat

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Replies

  • ndnmomma
    ndnmomma Posts: 466 Member
    Awe I know how this feels. In fact I hate the fact kids are honest with us to honest at times, but that is no excuse to be rude or express those comments. Mine have said that to people before, but make no mistake the are soon after corrected. To me its not acceptable behavior and I will not have kids like that manners and politeness can be learned and it should be!
  • PlunderBunneh
    PlunderBunneh Posts: 1,705 Member
    OMG!!! Do their parents not talk to them about this? .... It's the parents that should be taking responsibility for their actions and correcting them.

    I do everything I can to teach my four year old to be polite, and while she never calls anyone fat, she has made innocent comments about my sister's size ("oh, the car really moved when you got in, you're so big!"). It hurts when little ones say things like that, but they don't mean it rudely, they just don't have a social filter. We as parents can guide them as much as possible, but things will still be said, even if we talk to them about every single issue adults may be offended over.
    Most of the time, it really is just innocent kid talk.
    When it's more than that, it's time to talk to the mother.
  • misskatibear
    misskatibear Posts: 158 Member
    I've had it a couple of times, and I knew/know I've been overweight but never thought it was enough to be noticable for random children on the street/in the park to yell it at me! I think kids will be kids, I've always found it to be nasty little boys who say it mainly because they think they're being funny.

    Not a weight thing, but recently been yelled at by a kid saying 'You're ugly and you know it!" and I was sitting in traffic lights in the passenger seat of my boyfriends car with the window down. Some kids just like to be mean, and obviously a lot of kids are now raised on this 'ideal' typed woman, thank you to the media. It's getting worse an worse, they think these tiny models are 'normal'. I suppose really, it's not their fault.
  • teemarania
    teemarania Posts: 62
    I've had kids if I was having a baby. I've had adults ask too. All my freaking life!!! Looking forward to that never happening again, until I really am pregnant!
  • DrowningMermaid
    DrowningMermaid Posts: 143
    The boy I babysit was walking into the pool with me and his mom (for water aerobics) and he looked over at me and said "You look like you're going to have a baby". His mom was horrified but having a kid of my own (who has said "Wow, Mommy, your belly is BIIIIIIIIIIIG!" or exclaimed how large my butt is while I was trying on clothes in a crowded Walmart), I was unphased.

    I simply told him "I understand this is the way you feel and think, but if it was anyone but me, you'd have really hurt their feelings. There's a difference between speaking what you think in your head and keeping things to yourself. You may think someone is really fat, but it makes them sad if you say it out loud. If someone called you fat, would you be happy?" He shook his head no and I think he understood a bit better. He's a thick kid and I have a feeling he's been called fat in the past.

    Next time some kid (family or otherwise) mentions you in a fat-bashing way, even if they're unaware that's what it is, you need to set your sore feelings aside and tell them it's hurtful talk. If their parents aren't going to curb that behavior, someone needs to.
  • cmeade20
    cmeade20 Posts: 1,238 Member
    I cant believe how many people are saying oh shes only 7 blah blah blah. Im starting to see why kids can be such brats these days....Its one thing for a kid to ask what the stretch marks on your belly are or if youre having a baby. That is genuine childhood innocence and curiosity. Its quite another to jiggle your aunts thighs and tell her her legs are so fat. That is rude,obnoxious, disrespectful and mean. Never would fly in my house.
  • Erisad
    Erisad Posts: 1,580
    This is why I wanna get skinny before I even have kids, then burn the baby weight off before they learn how to speak. I don't know if I could handle that. Enough people my own age have asked if I was pregnant so I don't want it to come from a child. >.<'

    One of my cousins used to strut around singing, "Momma's got a big ol' butt, awww yeeeeeeah!" His mom was really thin and found it hilarious. XD
  • GlitterMamma11
    GlitterMamma11 Posts: 143 Member
    One time when my youngest was about 4yrs old we were in Barnes and Noble and this very, very large man walked in right in front of us. If you've been in a B&N before you know it's fairly quiet and my son loud as can be (and in an amazed tone) said, "That guy is so fat how does he fit in a car!" I about died! We quickly went in the opposite direction. I felt so awful. Then another time at the grocery store deli counter he says to me as the guy is helping me, "that guy is so fat!". They guy wasn't all that big but he just laughed and agreed. I was mortified. I'm big so it's not like he hasn't seen anyone overweight before! We had to have a talk about how everyone is different and that isn't bad. kids. ;o)
  • sandrajune72
    sandrajune72 Posts: 492 Member
    My eldest son once asked me if the lady passing us by in the street was a man or a woman!!! Now that was embarrassing!!! :laugh:

    Kids eh?! It's up to us parents to educate them in whats polite and pc!!
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    My 7-year-old niece grabbed my thighs, and said "These are bigger than my mom's and dad's combined. Your so fat." I've also had kids run up to me and grab my belly, with their parents looking horrified. Seriously, it's humiliating. Just wanted to get that off my chest.

    Edit: Oh, I forgot to mention when my niece said, "You have the body of a fat man." Nice.

    Look em dead in the eye and tell them they were adopted

    What's wrong with being adopted?
  • jsmith2377
    jsmith2377 Posts: 208 Member
    I teach middle schoolers so I've been asked quite a bit if I'm pregnant. I just respond with 'No, I'm just fat. Thanks.' They are super apologetic and then I usually explain how it's very impolite to ask a woman that.
    Also, when I was about 9 months pregnant with my first son, I worked at a K-8 school and had a kinder student say to me 'My mommy has a belly like yours....but there's no baby in there' and just walk away. All I could say was WOW.
  • joybedford
    joybedford Posts: 1,680 Member
    I once went shopping with my twins they were about 4 at the time. My son asked why we were we shopping and I replied "none of my holiday clothes fit me anymore", to which my daughter replied " Piers mummy is fat is it". I was upset but she was spot on. They now tell me how slim I am all the time I don,t mind that.
  • determinedbutlazy
    determinedbutlazy Posts: 1,941 Member
    When I worked in China as teacher, the kids would call me fat. That's what I get for teaching the little suckers adjectives.
    Also, my ex's family (Also Chinese) would quite matter-of-factly tell me I was too fat and I should go on a diet.
    Family, eh? Can't live with 'em, can't cut them up into tiny pieces and feed them to the dogs.
  • deadstarsunburn
    deadstarsunburn Posts: 1,337 Member
    I cant believe how many people are saying oh shes only 7 blah blah blah. Im starting to see why kids can be such brats these days....Its one thing for a kid to ask what the stretch marks on your belly are or if youre having a baby. That is genuine childhood innocence and curiosity. Its quite another to jiggle your aunts thighs and tell her her legs are so fat. That is rude,obnoxious, disrespectful and mean. Never would fly in my house.
    I agree. My cousin is six and she knows better than to say that stuff to people so does my boyfriends five year old sister. I think five and up the child should be expected to know better.

    I'm sorry that was said to you, I've not had a child say that to me as an adult but as a kid I was told almost daily how fat I was.
  • lbaileyjohannsen
    lbaileyjohannsen Posts: 133 Member
    I've had many little kids straight up tell me I'm really fat, I just chuckle and tell them it's rude to comment about someone's appearance, whether it's true or not! Kids are like sociopaths, they have to learn empathy and social skills. A kid, whether they are yours or someone else's, should be corrected. Then again, I've never felt humiliated or ashamed when someone calls me fat, because it's true. If they can't think of a more clever way to make me feel bad about myself, then they are an IDIOT (or a child!!)
  • iKapuniai
    iKapuniai Posts: 594 Member
    Speaking of little kids telling you that you're fat...

    My son, who just turned 4, has a habit of coming up to me and poking my breasts, which we call chi-chi's... one day he came up behind me, poked my back and said "Mama... why do you have chi-chi's on your back?"

    Ugh. So embarassing. Luckily, I don't THINK anyone heard it... either that, or they could imagine the humility and refrained from acknowledging it lol... but I think the thing that bothered me most is the fact that my son shouldn't have such an overweight, unhealthy mother... it made me sad. Not for me, but for him. He's my inspiration/motivation. :)

    Anywho, ever since I told him it was rude to comment about something like that... any time anyone says the word "fat"... my son says, with passion: "THAT'S NOT A NICE WORD!!" LOL... God, I love that boy!
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
    If a kid came up to me and called me fat, I'd smile and say "Yes, I am. And there's nothing wrong with that. People come in all shapes and sizes, and that's a wonderful thing."
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    I still want to know why some of you think that telling a child they are adopted is a reasonable retort.
  • Acliff510
    Acliff510 Posts: 122 Member
    I still want to know why some of you think that telling a child they are adopted is a reasonable retort.

    I think it was a silly joke. I wouldn't read into it much ... Apdoption can be a beautiful thing & i'm sure offending you or anyone else was not there intention.

    Now for me, i was adopted by my stepmother when I was 6 yrs old, & I now dispise the witch and just wish I had NO Mother listed on my birth certificate ... BUT ... i can't ... unless I want to spend the money to i guess.
  • JD2000
    JD2000 Posts: 16 Member
    why not let kids just be honest and all of us take it as the only honest criticism we are likely to hear?

    So I'm supposed to just sit back and let a 7-year-old continuously tell me "You're ugly" and ask me "Why are you so fat? You are the fattest person I know"? Great.

    Right now this girl knows it gets to you. She can smell your fear. Show her that it doesn't matter to you any more. Turn around and walk away. Any attention, even negative, is still attention and she's seeking that. If she says why aren't you talking to me/playing with me tell her truthfully she is rude and you don't stay around rude people. Your non-reaction will be your best weapon.
  • FullMetalWitch
    FullMetalWitch Posts: 11 Member
    True story: When I was very little, mom and I were sitting behind an obese woman in a red dress at church. I turned to mom and whispered as loudly as possible, "MOMMY, THAT'S A BIIIIIIIG RED DRESS!!!" Mom has never let me forget this story.

    But karma struck yesterday when a little girl in a shopping cart spotted me on my way home from roller derby and yelled, "LOOK MOMMY, SHE'S A STRIPPER!!!"

    Kids are hilariously uninhibited. Fortunately, I'm pretty sure we can all agree that the opinion of anyone young enough to think Hannah Montana is more important than the president can't be taken seriously.
  • beach_floatie
    beach_floatie Posts: 5
    This is so not about your weight or appearance. Does your niece know you are working on improving your fitness/health? If so, at 7 she is able to understand that it's a topic close to your heart and is "pushing your buttons" to get a reaction. Kids that age are in a developmental stage where independence and control is at the forefront. They "test" rude comments and kind of enjoy the fact that they can control someone's reaction and feelings. At that age they are not, however, able to really empathize. It's a bad combination. The good news is that with guidance and good role modeling they quickly move past it and learn that there are more appropriate ways to exert control and feel a sense of independence. The best thing to do is to not give her the reaction that could fuel the comments. Hold your head up high and tell her you love the way you look and you're taking steps to be even more fabulous. Another good line is "I'm sorry you feel that way. I don't." It's all about showing her you are confident. :happy:
  • TheBraveryLover
    TheBraveryLover Posts: 1,217 Member
    I've never experienced that, but sometimes when I'm out with my mom shopping, there will be kids who stare at her (she has discoid lupus and even though she wears makeup, her sores are pretty visible) and it pisses me off so much. Mainly because although my mom has had it for a long time, she's still very sensitive about it and it hurts her feelings. I tell her to ignore it, but sometimes the parents will watch their children, stare so obviously and won't say anything. I understand kids will be kids, but it's a bit harder when someone is already insecure about something.

    If I were ever insulted by a child, I'm the type to laugh it off and won't think twice about it, but some people who are a bit more insecure may not be so nonchalant. I wish more parents paid attention to their child while they're around others, and teach them how uncouth it is to stare at or insult strangers.
  • kayish
    kayish Posts: 39 Member
    I used to work at a day care and had a few different kids say something about my stomach and if I had a baby in it. 0.o At the time I was losing weight too. It was always embarrassing. And now I work in a nursing home and believe it or not old people have even less of a filter than kids. idk how many times I've had residents comment about my size or say rude things. There are some who are not all there, and I understand but others are just plain rude.

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