Why cant I just do this (VENT)

I'm late to this party; but I just wanted to second (or third, fourth, ...) the concept of baby steps. I set up a weekly mini-NSV goal and focus on that. Once you've claimed your non-scale victory, set up another mini-goal. It's amazing how the little things add up!

FYI, my own mini-NSV goal this week is to make sure all my meals and snacks are at least 3 hours apart (but no more than 4.) I know it's sounds silly and/or arbitrary; but in my case, it's helping me avoid grazing throughout the day and, keeping my cal intake/energy steady :-)

Slow and Steady wins the race every time :-)

Please feel free to add me as a friend! I know that slow & Steady requires a little more patience and support than those going for the dramatic weight loss!

I have read a lot of articles on getting started, and I was in the exact same boat a couple of months ago. I was talking to a friend a little over a month ago who does personal training, and he made it plain when I was getting on myself about my weight gain, and he had just lost 50 lbs. He was very straight forward and said, it will be a priority when you make it a priority. It was like a light switch. I had spent a lot of time focusing on everything else in my life, and I wasn't making my health a priority. I was obsessing over my weight gain, and the stretch marks, and being tired, but I wasn't making my eating right, or exercising, or stress reduction a priority (for various reasons/excuses).

Two years ago, I was 80lbs lighter than what I am today, and, in many ways, I felt devastated about the gain. 40lbs ago, I had a personal trainer and worked my booty off with no visible results. I mean I was sweating, and working, and stressing. I didn't want to step on a scale because it always showed the same number. I quit and gained another 40 lbs. I watched documentaries on food, and how we process it, how it's made, cooked, farmed, success stories. I bought a juicer after watching Sick, Fat, and Nearly Dead, thinking that I was going to just juice everything, but life got in the way (and juicing really wasn't the answer for me). AND, there was always some form of temptation and it seemed easier to "give in" to the temptation.

3 weeks ago, I started eating paleo. Last week I started P90x. This is not an endorsement for either, just things that have changed for me in the last few weeks. I kept a food journal for the first week (until a friend turned me on to this site), and now it's not a chore. I LOVE food. I always have and I always will, so I made peace with it. Up until these last few weeks, it was a struggle to figure out what were right choices for me, and what works for my lifestyle. I need meals that are quick (and single person friendly); I need to be able to keep track of my calories without feeling like it's a chore; and I need to eat tasty things. So far, I've been sticking to it, and I don't feel deprived. It's still new to me, but I think this is the turning point because I made an affirmative choice about what's important to me.

I think the hardest parts about starting new habits are: (1) we are results driven, and if we don't see the result that we expect by a certain time, then we feel we have failed which makes us less likely to attempt again; and (2) that we think in terms of success and failure when it comes to our health. Food, and living, and existing is not a test we pass or fail. It's an experience. It's about how we want to live it. It took a lot for me to reach a point where I was ready to stop wanting, and start doing, and once I made the personal choice of how I want to live, and what I was willing (or not willing) to sacrifice, there are little to no temptations.

I'm sorry if this was too much information, or if it's out in left field. Good luck with everything, and if you want support, feel free to add me as a friend. I will say that this community has been very helpful for me thus far.

At the risk of going against what some of you have said, studies actually show that people are more likely to stick with a change when it is DRASTIC, rather than doing baby steps. I agree that something has to "click", you have to really decide that you're going to make a change no matter what, and then make one, a BIG one, and you're more likely to succeed.

I need to read in detail later. Great ideas from what I have read so far and YES...it is definitely baby steps!

You can do this! Just start by eating whatever you like and just measuring out 1 serving size according to the nutritional guide on the box. Drink lots of calorie free liquids to fill up on and start there. I know diet sodas are "bad" but start there. Slow and steady wins the race! For example, when I started, I still ate my beloved potato chips daily. I ate 1-2 serviings (160 calories each). I know it's not healthy but I had to have it! This is a way of life, if you're planning on doing this for the long haul, you have to eat foods you love, just in the proper portion sizes. YOU CAN HAVE YOUR CAKE AND EAT IT TOO! and you can have everything you want, just not at the same time
Add me!!!!! I would love to help

Ok so I have dieted myself all the way up to 240lbs. Ughh I try almost everyday to stick to any diet plan and I fail every single day. Ive tried it all. I fail if its too restricting and I fail if nots outlined and planned for me like counting calories because I just eat junk food and sugar and go over my calories. I have two daughters who I DO NOT want to inherit my weight problem and I feel so gross and fat that it affects my marriage in a very negative way. I want to change my life but I just dont know what its gonna take for me to do so..... I cant believe im putting all this out there

It doesn't sound like you're failing to me. Every time you try a diet you're taking a step, reorganizing your thoughts and tactics, doing something differently and ultimately you're eliminating what doesn't work. You're only getting closer to doing it. Diets are a lot more complex than just weight control. It affects everything about you. Every day is preparing you for the final step, which is losing the extra weight. That will be the last and easiest part of it when the rest of you is ready.

Also, from what you said, being too strict will make it harder. Sometimes you'll have a great week and you can really have that strictness and it will work. And some weeks you'll go over your calories every day. Don't worry about sticking to what any plan tells you. Just use it as a guideline. Even with the MFP app, start with just trying to maintain your weight. If you reduce your calories too much, your body/mind will "panic" subconsciously, and you'll just get the "craving" feeling. Have you ever tried a hard diet and found yourself eating right out of the peanut butter jar? Your body wants those calories back! But if you ease into it, you'll kind of train that reaction to not be so bad down the road.

One thing thats helped (still helping) me is just being proud of my own strictness about my diet. Don't let your family or friends lure you back into complacency with their opinions. (if it happens...it does for me) I can go out to a restaurant with a friend and watch them eat an appetizer, entré, and dessert and...CLEARLY it looks good and I would love to eat it, but I'm content with me making a decision and sticking to it. I've spent many an evening watching people eat those things while I sit there with just a glass of water. Its one way I get to exercise some control over my own life. Of course, I eat before I put myself in that situation. But I eat what I've decided. Not whats just available in a pinch.

Anywho, these things will fall into place for you over time. Rarely do decisions people make yield immediate results for them. Don't worry about the time it takes. Its month to month, not day to day. Just keep doing.

^^^^^^ that there guy was just simply AWESOME

I'm there with you Miller0438! Thanks for this post! It has motivated me too!!

when you get motivated, you will do it.
start by not keeping junk food around, so its not there to munch on throughout the day.
replace the junk with healthier snacks, like fruit and veggies.
there are also 100 cal packs of things like cookies and chips that taste good, as long as u eat just one pack and not 3 or 4 per sitting.
try to limit yourself to just 2 snacks a day.
work on portion control.
get out there and exercise, even just a 30 min. walk every morning or evening will help.

I just started Ideal Protein and it is the first time I've been able to stay on a diet. 9 days.... down six lbs.

My only real suggestion is to try baby steps. Don't try to uproot your whole way of eating or exercising. Do one thing. Cut out sugary drinks and/or soda. Just try that. In a month, try walking for 15 minutes a day, every day. Everyone's got 15 minutes right? Keep progressing and slowly substitute crappy snacks for better snacks, crappy meals for better meals, and sitting on the couch for meaningful exercise. I'm 14-15 months in and I'm still making improvements to my diet and exercise every week. Baby steps. No one just changes their entire way of life in a day.

^^ This, even small changes can make a difference over time, and for most people, they're easier to keep. You'd be surprised at how big cumulative change can be over time.

I've posted this quote before but I try to remember it every day to keep myself motivated. "This is the one body I have and I do everything possible to keep it in the best of shape." Don Ameche

you will do it when being the way you are hurts more than the effort to change

Priority. It has to be #1. While you are losing weight YOUR health has to be the most important thing. Turn that around in your head because it's an all consuming process that needs absolute focus & dedication. When I started, I was a single mom, literally working 90hrs. a week some weeks, I didn't sleep Sunday nights at ALL because I had back to back shifts. I dragged myself to the gym before or (usually) after a 12-16hr. shift because I figured I couldn't get any more exhausted so why not? My son had to adjust to my schedule for once instead of the other way around.

I think it was already said, you have want it bad!

I must say to this...you are amazing! WTG!

you will do it when being the way you are hurts more than the effort to change

After decades of yo-yo -dieting , this was me last Christmas Eve… I just decided nothing tasted better than feeling good enough to play my horn at church and being able to fit into my clothes. 7 moths later, I feel better and weight less than I did 27 years ago…

I know it's hard to stay motivated and easy to get discouraged. Definitely take baby steps and always just take it one day at a time. Never forget that tomorrow is a new day.

I just started my weight loss journey this week. We can do this!

Good luck