Is smartphones killing your relationship?

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Replies

  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
    I can see this being true...in my last relationship we went out for dinner one of the last times.

    i resolved to put down my iPhone and just spend time talking to him and I told him this...he got VERY angry, slammed down his phone and then made the whole experience so embarassing and miserable that we left halfway through...

    then he went through a drive through, picked up a burger and took us home where he spent the rest of the evening in front of the tv while texting and eating a burger...then chips, then a whole pint of ice cream all while texting and half a$$edly watching TV.

    can we say unconscious eating at ALL?

    It was so upsetting and depressing.

    Lauren
  • ellenxmariex3
    ellenxmariex3 Posts: 165 Member
    I'm 19 and have already decided I'm never getting a smartphone, if that's possible with the way society is heading. I don't feel the need to be connected 24/7. I have a regular cell phone and that's good enough for me. Plus I never want to pay a data fee.

    When I'm away at school I text my boyfriend a lot and we talk on the phone every night. Now that we're living together for the summer I barely ever text or talk on the phone unless I'm talking to my parents. My friends and I don't really text. We prefer to just meet up and hang out.
  • Rosa1213
    Rosa1213 Posts: 456 Member
    Hm, I think these really extreme things happen only in really extreme cases.
    I only know one person that's on their phone all the time, and that's my brother. He is texting everyone constantly!!!

    I do text, of course, but not as much as some people seem to. I think I'm on my phone a lot more now that I have MFP, because i have to log my food every time I eat. So, I get on my phone every time I eat.

    I've read those shocking news stories about people who send hundreds of texts every day, but I'm not really sure that those people exist in our everyday lives. I have a smartphone, and it serves as my alarm clock, my watch, my way to communicate with people that are far away, my main email portal, and my MFP portal.

    Still, I don't think this means I neglect other areas of my life. Plus, I know many other people who use their phone for as many things as I do, and they don't seem obsessed with it.

    Oh, and forgot to add: I'm in a long-distance relationship, and I talk on the phone to my boyfriend every night. This is when my phone gets used the most. I love my phone, because that's my main way of communicating with him.
  • I was actually thinking about posting a similar topic. I guess great minds think alike. :wink:

    I love technology and think it has it's place. But the other day, I was looking around at my kids and the extra kids in my house. Most of them had a smart phone or an ipod or some type of electronic in their hands. There was NO INTERACTION between the kids. AT ALL. I was like, "okay... this has go to stop." So... I told them all to put their gadgets away, and we played games. Kids don't know how to do that anymore. I made up a scavenger hunt, picture scavenger hunt, organized a water fight, Truth or Dare, Hide n seek in the dark, charades... you get the idea... and they had a blast!

    I admit that my phone goes off all day long. I'm popular. What can I say. :tongue: But I do know how to put it on silent, put it down, and spend time with the people that matter in my life. And, honestly, if I had a SO that had a problem with my smart phone, and he wasn't just being a jerk, I would totally choose him over a freakin' phone.

    P.S. I am an English teacher. It is my job to see grammatical errors and spelling errors and such. But you know what... when I'm online with others and posting on the boards, I tend to overlook such things. Truthfully, sometimes I type in mistakes on purpose because if I wrote "formally" some people would think I was a weirdo. This is not a formal paper, people. And, yeah, I use slang and acronyms. I, personally, think it's rude to read a thread/post and only answer to "correct" someone. Just my two cents on that one.
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,262 Member
    I don't go overboard with my cell. I don't do a lot of texting. But I like getting Facebook updates from family and e-mail. I use it to add to my diary here when I am eating out. In fact my b/f did get mad at me when I was using it to post to my diary at his birthday dinner. I just said that recording my food is an important part of my weight loss, and did he have a problem with that? He didn't say anything more. I think he beginning to appreciate the results. ;D
  • Rayand22
    Rayand22 Posts: 18
    bump
  • Babymomakell
    Babymomakell Posts: 257 Member
    I bet your fun to date. Im sure you probably never use slang or ever have grammatical errors. lol. The fact is I saw it and wanted to change it but it would not let me edit the title. They should fix that.

    Yes, they should change that. The fact of the matter is, I was not the only person who noticed it. Regardless, it doesn't change anything about who I am or "how it is to date me." That is a ridiculous comment and was totally unnecessary. Just because you cannot handle a polite correction on a horrific grammar choice, is very immature. There is no need to make a personal attack. Just because you can hide behind your computer does not give you the right to throw meaningless assaults around on the internet. It was a polite correction, and I assume by your reaction that you are embarrassed of it, we all make mistakes, sure, but a grown and mature adult should be able to take ownership and not take low-blow stabs at an otherwise well meaning person (that they do not know!)
    you're*

    LMAO, Thank you =)
  • shaynak112
    shaynak112 Posts: 751 Member
    I text a lot.
    I also get email on my phone and I do independent contracting work and it's important for me to respond to emails fairly regularly.
    Plus, honestly, the subway and bus is REALLY boring for 2 hours every day without my phone - for email, texting, and music.

    I wouldn't text during sex though.
  • I can see this being true...in my last relationship we went out for dinner one of the last times.

    i resolved to put down my iPhone and just spend time talking to him and I told him this...he got VERY angry, slammed down his phone and then made the whole experience so embarassing and miserable that we left halfway through...

    then he went through a drive through, picked up a burger and took us home where he spent the rest of the evening in front of the tv while texting and eating a burger...then chips, then a whole pint of ice cream all while texting and half a$$edly watching TV.

    can we say unconscious eating at ALL?

    It was so upsetting and depressing.

    Lauren

    OMG I think I dated the same jerk! LOL I was seeing a guy back in April that could NOT get off of his phone at all. It was so annoying. We could barely have a conversation. Then, he would come over to MY house and sit in MY recliner and watch MY televsion while I cooked for HIM and HIS kids. The only thing that wasn't mine was his phone, and that was glued to his hand.
  • maremare312
    maremare312 Posts: 1,143 Member
    Are*
  • ElizaRoche
    ElizaRoche Posts: 2,005 Member


    A study just came out and it showed 8 percent will be on their phones during sex

    seriously?????? wow something is not right there!!!!!






    how can you have sex and be on the phone?
    apperantly someone isnt doing it right!!

    Not necessarily. You can use the video function to record some of the fun :p

    i like the way you think!, either the video or camera.. fun times! haha
  • bigaussiebloke
    bigaussiebloke Posts: 257 Member
    A Smartphone is only as smart as the person using it!
  • cmeade20
    cmeade20 Posts: 1,238 Member
    While I do text (I despise talking on the phone) I dont feel that texting interferes between me and my boyfriend. We are capable of having supper or watching a movie without texting the whole time. But then again I do seem to be of the rare breed that hears the little text message dingle but is able to ignore it for half an hour because I am doing something that requires my attention (Ya know driving and the like).
  • jodycoady
    jodycoady Posts: 598 Member
    **ARE** smartphones killing your relationship??

    Well I have to say that I hate the damn things for the reason that they create RUDE MONSTERS, lol, especially when it comes to the clods constantly responding to their fb notifications and the like...(narcissistic much?)

    Wow, I do sound like a hater, but please read on..

    Me and my BF dumped FB and we're so glad to be free of it....it brought out the worst in me....(I can't speak for him, and I can't speak for you either)

    We have a crappy little Samsung phone that we share, and have for almost 4 years....of course I thought about upgrading sometimes, but to see how people shut out the world is just plain RUDE. I'm weak. I'm sure I'd do the same.

    Bartenders, take note...turn off your phone or you can forget a decent tip.

    I once took my child to a public pool and one of the "Lifeguards" was texting on the sly...

    But I digress:

    The smartphones are quite handy, take wonderful pictures and so on, BUT....

    I feel I am better off without it....and honestly, I realize it's not ALL Smartphone owners, but it's really rude when attending a family get-together, and there are some -- and let me tell you the ages can be from 14-65 years old -- that are on stupid Facebook, rather than chatting with family members.

    I think Smartphones/BB's are killing physical interaction...but then again, it could be improving others...sigh....I know I'm all over the place.

    I'm a little old-fashioned but I really miss the days when you received a call while at home, you met when and where you said you would, and you worked out a problem face-to-face.
  • do4fit
    do4fit Posts: 23
    I text my boyfriend a lot seeing as we do not live together and neither of us are the type who love to talk on the phone. If I do not want to be contacted I turn my phone on silent or off. I have a feeling once my boyfriend and I move in together that I will not be texting much if at all. I do use facebook to keep in contact with certain friends... and check out a few groups but other than that I find it rather useless and boring. Having a cell phone is super handy though for emergencies and such. I guess to each their own... but it is definitely not destroying mine... we see each other about once a week and we don't look at our phones much at all.
  • Rayand22
    Rayand22 Posts: 18
    Are*

    I have this problem as well. I can not ever chill with my friends anymore, they all are on their phones religiously. I dont ever bother trying to hang out with them anymore. Its boring and its stupid to be on your phone all the time. One of my girlfriends just got dumped over her being on her phone all the time. Its a problem and if people dont think it is, ask your friends, im sure they would prefer to hang out with you and really talk to you. Ant, dont let those stupid pathetic insecure girls get to you over grammer. Like you said, Im sure they are perfect. They really do need to let people edit the topic.
  • Renae_Nae
    Renae_Nae Posts: 935 Member
    If you will pick up your phone during sex then you need to fix something!

    I agree, but at the same time I think they can benifit a relationship. I live 1,300 miles from the man I love. Being able to constantly connect and send pictures of random things in our day really helps.
  • Babymomakell
    Babymomakell Posts: 257 Member
    Ant, dont let those stupid pathetic insecure girls get to you over grammer. Like you said, Im sure they are perfect like girl who wrote the word "are".

    So, exactly how does correct usage of language make one stupid or insecure? Oh the irony...
  • jodycoady
    jodycoady Posts: 598 Member
    I think it really has become an addiction for some people.

    I think I was addicted to Facebook for a while. I deleted my account that I got my Senior year of college about 7 years ago. It was SO weird. I went through this weird mourning stage. I felt like an idiot. And I have to admit, I do miss interacting with my friends from college that I don't see often or family that lives away.

    As far as a hobby, yes (even though I think it's crazy).....my students tell me that texting is one of their hobbies all the time.

    I love your honesty! I was addicted to fb too...it brought out the worst in me: envy, haughtiness, narcissism....hummm how many of the deadly sins??? thanks for sharing.
  • Babymomakell
    Babymomakell Posts: 257 Member

    I have this problem as well. I can not ever chill with my friends anymore, they all are on their phones religiously. I dont ever bother trying to hang out with them anymore. Its boring and its stupid to be on your phone all the time. One of my girlfriends just got dumped over her being on her phone all the time. Its a problem and if people dont think it is, ask your friends, im sure they would prefer to hang out with you and really talk to you. Ant, dont let those stupid pathetic insecure girls get to you over grammer. Like you said, Im sure they are perfect like Babymomakell and Maremare312. They really do need to let people edit the topic.

    Great job editing your post... I never said I was perfect. Actually my post was a polite correction... It was YOU that decided to throw the insults around...
  • Rayand22
    Rayand22 Posts: 18
    Ant, dont let those stupid pathetic insecure girls get to you over grammer. Like you said, Im sure they are perfect like girl who wrote the word "are".

    So, exactly how does correct usage of language make one stupid or insecure? Oh the irony...



    Whats the point of it other than being not nice. How would you like it if someone called you out? There is no reason to do it.
  • LetsTryThisAgain54
    LetsTryThisAgain54 Posts: 381 Member
    I don't know why... but this bothers me... lol

    "Is smartphones killing your relationship?"

    Should be:

    "Are smartphones killing your relationship?"

    Sorry, Thank you, and Continue =)


    This post was harmless. Some of you people need to lighten up. Seriously!
  • jodycoady
    jodycoady Posts: 598 Member
    BTW, I also corrected the "are", but I should have added that I loved your post and I'm glad you brought it up. Sorry :)
  • Babymomakell
    Babymomakell Posts: 257 Member

    Whats the point of it other than being not nice. How would you like it if someone called you out? There is no reason to do it.

    The point was to let him know, to help him? I don't know, polite awareness?? I do believe that I was nothing but polite, and as an English major myself, I would welcome someone correcting my grammar, spelling or anything of the sort.

    Insults are never necessary... I have heard a quote before, and forgive me I do not remember where, but it was something along the lines of this:

    Insults are never needed, as an intelligent thought can produce much more meaning and use in a conversation. Insults provide nothing but empty words aimed to hurt someone, which serves no intelligent purpose.

    So, why insult someone you do not even know?
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    for me, poor grammar and not knowing how to spell would kill more relationships than someone checking crap on their phone ;)
  • takehimaway
    takehimaway Posts: 499 Member
    for me, poor grammar and not knowing how to spell would kill more relationships than someone checking crap on their phone ;)

    This! Neither of us have smartphones, and we both work from home, so yes, we do IM from across the room to tell each other, "Xyz.com is over," instead of her, trying to yell over the music. No, I don't think it ruins our relationship in the slightest.
  • CoCoBean14
    CoCoBean14 Posts: 107 Member
    if two people have the same technology and have the same level of connectedness to the world, there should be no problem.

    it's when it's not evenly balanced is when problems start. you need a compatible addiction. ;)

    THIS.

    I love my iPhone, but it doesn't mean I'm incapable of interacting with people in the real world.

  • Whats the point of it other than being not nice. How would you like it if someone called you out? There is no reason to do it.

    The point was to let him know, to help him? I don't know, polite awareness?? I do believe that I was nothing but polite, and as an English major myself, I would welcome someone correcting my grammar, spelling or anything of the sort.

    Insults are never necessary... I have heard a quote before, and forgive me I do not remember where, but it was something along the lines of this:

    Insults are never needed, as an intelligent thought can produce much more meaning and use in a conversation. Insults provide nothing but empty words aimed to hurt someone, which serves no intelligent purpose.

    So, why insult someone you do not even know?

    As a fellow English major, I appreciate your awareness of grammar and spelling. I can also agree with you that insults are not necessary. Neither do I think it was quite necessary for you or the others to call him out on his own post, though. This is not a formal paper, nor is it a formal setting. Some of you who were so quick to correct him also had errors of another nature in your sentences. This is a forum for chit chat, fun, and games. Perhaps, in your realm, it is socially acceptable to correct others. Like I said, that's fine. If he were writing a book or an advertisement for a product or a research paper, I would also point out areas for improvement. However, he was posting a topic for discussion. If you do not want to participate in the discussion, then, don't. Walk away.

    Rachael is taking up for her friend. I don't necessarily fault her for that because Anthony is on my friends' list as well, and I wanted to take up for him, too.
  • Babymomakell
    Babymomakell Posts: 257 Member
    As a fellow English major, I appreciate your awareness of grammar and spelling. I can also agree with you that insults are not necessary. Neither do I think it was quite necessary for you or the others to call him out on his own post, though. This is not a formal paper, nor is it a formal setting. Some of you who were so quick to correct him also had errors of another nature in your sentences. This is a forum for chit chat, fun, and games. Perhaps, in your realm, it is socially acceptable to correct others. Like I said, that's fine. If he were writing a book or an advertisement for a product or a research paper, I would also point out areas for improvement. However, he was posting a topic for discussion. If you do not want to participate in the discussion, then, don't. Walk away.

    Rachael is taking up for her friend. I don't necessarily fault her for that because Anthony is on my friends' list as well, and I wanted to take up for him, too.

    As much as I may disagree with your opinion here, I do respect your response. Especially because you acted in a mature and intelligent manner.

    Personally, I feel that if a correction was polite and in a light-hearted manner (as I believe mine was) then nothing further needs to be said... It takes a new level when insults and name calling enter the picture, where regardless of the social realm, it is extremely immature.

    Anyways, I have no qualms with differing opinions as long as they are discussed in a mature manner. Did I come out and call him a "dumb-*kitten*" for using "is" instead of "are".... no =)

    I realize that no one here actually knows me, and knows that I tend to be very easy-going person, but when it is put in text it is often to be misconstrued. So we all (myself included) need to be careful of the tone we use, and even then (as is apparently the case here) others will still find any reason to be offended.

  • As much as I may disagree with your opinion here, I do respect your response. Especially because you acted in a mature and intelligent manner.

    Personally, I feel that if a correction was polite and in a light-hearted manner (as I believe mine was) then nothing further needs to be said... It takes a new level when insults and name calling enter the picture, where regardless of the social realm, it is extremely immature.

    Anyways, I have no qualms with differing opinions as long as they are discussed in a mature manner. Did I come out and call him a "dumb-*kitten*" for using "is" instead of "are".... no =)

    I realize that no one here actually knows me, and knows that I tend to be very easy-going person, but when it is put in text it is often to be misconstrued. So we all (myself included) need to be careful of the tone we use, and even then (as is apparently the case here) others will still find any reason to be offended.

    I appreciate differing opinions as well. I do not believe that your intent when you corrected him was to be mean, but, yes, sometimes tone and inflection are hard to comprehend on public forums. People cannot see your facial expressions or hear your tone of voice, so, often times, your message and meaning get misconstrued. It happens to the best of us.

    I am glad you did not call him a dumb-*kitten*, though, because he is actually an intelligent and very funny man.

    I will admit that I HATE dangling prepositions. Can't stand them. But, because most people would have NO IDEA what I was talking about and would think I was a complete weirdo if I typed and posted correctly, I don't always post the way that I know is correct. LOL
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