Called fat by a stranger.

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  • Killing_Perfection
    Killing_Perfection Posts: 79 Member
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    Been there, seen that.

    While I agree that today's kids really need some verbal slap to the face for their lacking manners, it's not just them. When I was a kid other kids already called me fat, even compared me to a tank. They made fun of my skin, fun of my weight, fun of my style, fun of my liking for the sciences - you get the point.

    I'm not overweight any more, and I do get quite a number of compliments, but you can always count on someone to be insulting. Yesterday I was just out buying supplies and got the "OH MY GOOOOOD" treatment by an old woman at the check-out because I like to wear black. And it wasn't even anything exceptionally creepy, a skirt and a batman pullover.

    She was lucky I was taught how to act properly around people and have some nerves of steel. People can be idiots, but it's sadly not just the kids these days....
  • m60kaf
    m60kaf Posts: 421 Member
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    maybe you should have slapped him. Lack of fear of retribution is all the problem
  • sho3girl
    sho3girl Posts: 10,799 Member
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    "Beauty is as beauty does" was in a book I used to read to my younger sister. Methinks this REALLY needs to given to more children!


    ((hugs)) to OP
  • HunterKiller_wechange
    HunterKiller_wechange Posts: 369 Member
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    Kids these days! No bloody respect! Bring back the cane i say! :angry:
  • Pixie_star1234
    Pixie_star1234 Posts: 55 Member
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    Well, I don't know if this will make you feel better, but I was called fat by one of my one of my boyfriend's friends(female). That really hurt a lot and stuck with me for a long time.
    Now, I am slim and could not give a f..k about what they think.
  • Roos2104
    Roos2104 Posts: 22
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    My response would be: "Hey, I may be fat, but you'll always be ugly, and I can diet."
    Don't let it get you down!
  • divacat80
    divacat80 Posts: 299 Member
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    You should have called him "stupid little virgin" apart from the word stupid you're not truly insulting him because both things are supposed to be true XD well... All three things to be exact.
    The bad part is that you would look like you approve sex between kids but you would surely hurt his feelings :P
    I don't know if it's illegal where you live, but this kind of remarks surely would need a good slap on the face. It's illegal where i live... Unfortunately ;(

    I'm on your same boat, i don't want kids either because i've seen their dark side and i've been bullied by kids who were growing up in loving homes with loving and caring parents. So any kid cand end up being an a****le, no matter how well you bring them up. The skills they need to learn to socialize and deal with the wholething are the same they use for bullying. And they even dare to bully adults these days!!!! I hate them. At 12 i did know what it means to hurt someone and to have respect for others so there's no excuse.
  • allisona28
    allisona28 Posts: 186 Member
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    Ignoring these kids is the best idea and remember they are kids, cursing back at them only affirms to them that cursing is okay. You're the adult, showing a better example is important, even if you're furious.
    I agree.....those children are punks and stupid...you are the smart and mature adult. Hang in there.
  • writinwater
    writinwater Posts: 52
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    My method of responding to these types of oxygen thieves is to give them my most amused, distainful look and say, "I bet your parents are *really* proud of you."

    A further response, for when they come back with "I haven't got any" (or in your case possibly "***** I ain't got none, I was raised by the streets" /cue Coolio song) is, "Clearly not!" and walk off with your head held high, confident in the knowledge that while you can change your physique if you want to, they will probably always be ****holes.
  • LisaLouisiana
    LisaLouisiana Posts: 145 Member
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    Personally, I love that you let loose on him. In some way, you made him accountable for being ugly.

    12 year old boys are idiots. Have you ever seen Beavis and Butthead? Young boys really are like that! I've raised five of them and they and my husband all admit it. lol

    Use this as motivation. Let it put a fire in your diet and exercise.

    Not all kids are like this. Odds are, reporting it to him mother would not help because she is either not taking the time or putting in the effort to raise her kids right or his dad talks to her this way. You can raise gentlemen and ladies, not using those words lightly, if you put the effort into it. Too many kids these days are raising themselves.
  • StarvingDiva
    StarvingDiva Posts: 1,107 Member
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    I'm reading all these posts and I guess I should feel lucky that a stranger has never screamed out a car window at me. *knock on wood* I shudder to think what I might say or how I may react. That is just plain terrible to experience.

    I did overhear two girls in a bar bathroom talking about me and a friend once but it was mostly amusing. They were lamenting about how they couldn't get the hockey players from our local team to buy them a drink and how come the hockey players were hanging out with the two fat chicks. She went as far as to describe my friend and said "What the hell does that fat chick have that I don't" needless to say when she came out of the stall I was waiting to go in with a huge smirk on my face and she stopped short and her face fell and I told her she should try getting a personality and maybe the hockey players might talk to them next time. That has been my only experience of hearing someone call me fat but it was amusing to me, I am sure if someone yelled at me out a window or in a park when I was just minding my own business it would be a different story. This chick was just talking about me and I happened to overhear.

    Don't let other peoples words define you. At some point in their life they may have nasty things said about them and maybe they will realize how cruel they were at one point and really regret it. Mob mentality tends to rule on these things as well, when in a big group men especially feel emboldened to say things that they normally wouldn't say otherwise. If a guy ever called me fat in a group of his friends I would probably calmly tsk tsk and say that's not what you said last weekend when you tried to have sex with me and I turned you away because your d*ck was too small. Don't try to front now for your friends. Be more secure in your d*ck someone out there will want it.
  • Solly123
    Solly123 Posts: 162 Member
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    I just would have shouted back to the little f***er - at least I can diet and get thin - not much you can do with god awful UGLY!! and kept walking..

    His mates would have taken care of the rest of the slagging and he'd think twice about doing that again...
  • Lisah8969
    Lisah8969 Posts: 1,247 Member
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    In college, my boyfriend's nephew called me fat while we were driving to a family function (his family...not mine). I spent the whole time sitting by myself feeling HORRIBLE. This was over 20 years ago and sadly, I still think about this and it still hurts. The worst part is that I was 5'8" and about 170 pounds at the time which I would be elated right now to be again!

    I am sorry this happened, but I am glad you confronted those kids! They will think twice before doing it again as apparently they didn't expect that. I can't say that I would have had to strength to do that and I would have just walked away crying and they would have had that to be "proud" of as well.

    It sucks...I know...but you are not the person that they were talking about. You are a wonderful person!
  • staceface519
    staceface519 Posts: 167
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    Ive had that happen to me many many many a times and i feel your pain. Kids now a days are getting wrose but so is their obesity so while your bettering yourself those kids are becoming how we once were and have to go through the same torment from other kids ( like i did allllll throught my school days). . . . dont let it get to you. They are only 12 and immature ( i remember boys at that age). . . and they dont have respect. Just open your ears to all hte people giving u motivation and support and block out all the closeminded annoyances that exist in this world. :)
  • ARDuBaie
    ARDuBaie Posts: 379 Member
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    Just remember that rotten children come from rotten parenting. They are a reflection of what they learn at home and the 'friends' their parents allow them to hang around with. I have two grown children, 26 and 31. Very well mannered and successful. It can be done, but the word is called 'diligent'. You must be on top of them all the time, even when it comes to who they hang around with, what they watch on television (we didn't have one), etc. You can raise good children, you just can't do it from a lounge chair.

    As for how you handled it, you gave him the satisfaction of knowing that he got to you. I would have just kept walking. Remember, you have the power of making yourself upset about these things. You control how you feel, your emotions, etc. Not that child.
  • juggalotus
    juggalotus Posts: 227
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    I'm reading all these posts and I guess I should feel lucky that a stranger has never screamed out a car window at me. *knock on wood* I shudder to think what I might say or how I may react. That is just plain terrible to experience.

    I did overhear two girls in a bar bathroom talking about me and a friend once but it was mostly amusing. They were lamenting about how they couldn't get the hockey players from our local team to buy them a drink and how come the hockey players were hanging out with the two fat chicks. She went as far as to describe my friend and said "What the hell does that fat chick have that I don't" needless to say when she came out of the stall I was waiting to go in with a huge smirk on my face and she stopped short and her face fell and I told her she should try getting a personality and maybe the hockey players might talk to them next time. That has been my only experience of hearing someone call me fat but it was amusing to me, I am sure if someone yelled at me out a window or in a park when I was just minding my own business it would be a different story. This chick was just talking about me and I happened to overhear.

    Don't let other peoples words define you. At some point in their life they may have nasty things said about them and maybe they will realize how cruel they were at one point and really regret it. Mob mentality tends to rule on these things as well, when in a big group men especially feel emboldened to say things that they normally wouldn't say otherwise. If a guy ever called me fat in a group of his friends I would probably calmly tsk tsk and say that's not what you said last weekend when you tried to have sex with me and I turned you away because your d*ck was too small. Don't try to front now for your friends. Be more secure in your d*ck someone out there will want it.

    That's ****ty what that girl said! I would actually find that amusing like you did though...it's a little different. It's like haha skank, I'm getting all the guys and you aren't!!! :) But I LOVEEEEEE that response about the small ****!!! I will have to use that one day!! !LOVE IT!!
  • skjshaw
    skjshaw Posts: 1
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    Been called that and then some! I was walking, just as you were, going up a large hill, and this car drove past me, and the chick yelled out the window, "All that walking ain't doing you no good honey." I was pretty shocked and didn't know how to respond, but my instincts kicked in and I just flipped them off. Not that it matter, but releasing some of the anger helped. But this last one, OMG. We had just installed our pool, and my husband had his best friend over with their children. The guys were working on installing the ladder and I was in the pool with a few of the kids. What timing, I had to go to the bathroom. No ladder, so I was going to have to jump and push myself up. I couldn't do. My kids were laughing at me, as I was laughing at myself thinking. OMG, I can't even lift myself out of this dang pool. I finally said it aloud and my husbands best friend's kid, yelled, "thats cuz you are so fat." Dead silence. Did the parents say anything? NOPE. I just turned around and glared at her and said, "you just wait, your day is coming, and then we will see who is fat." I know, she is only 9, but, you know, the parents didn't say anything, not a word. Since that day on, when that whole family comes over, I am a total B to them. They showed me no respect, and I can not forgive that moment. They showed me absolutely no respect, and therefore, I want nothing to do with them. Being a "bigger" person, has also made me a stronger person.
  • angimac
    angimac Posts: 145 Member
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    Yes, I have been called fat by a stranger. By a rude little 16 year old girl who was standing at the end of the checkout line talking to her friend and I had the audacity to say "excuse me" not once, but 3 times because she kept ignoring me. The person I assume was her mother was at the cashier paying for her stuff, and looked back at me and laughed and said something about how she (the teen) just stops anywhere to talk, and I said "yeah, she must be a little hard of hearing too" and the teenager called me a fat white b***h. Her mother just looked at her and shook her head.

    Weight is something we can change... Ugly on the other hand is forever...
  • Aviendha_RJ
    Aviendha_RJ Posts: 600 Member
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    My cousin was looking for a moisturizer at WalMart & was told by a shopkeeper that pregnant women want one with cocoa butter.

    She's not pregnant.

    People suck.
  • kariebo
    kariebo Posts: 101
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    So sorry that that happened to you! The preteens - teens are vicious anymore.. they have no compassion or morals or anything that might make them think twice. I know I am always very conscious of what my 5 yr old says and telling him to be mindful of other peoples feelings. He actually doesnt use the word 'fat'.. when he sees a larger person he says they are 'tough looking' ... i am thinking he got that because when he sees 'tough' guys on tv they are more surly looking... so it seems that he is confusing the term -- although i dont mind that kind of confusion. ANYWAYS... kids are just mean and at that age it doesnt even matter if their parents taught them right or not.. they are obnoxious and like to flaunt it.

    reading through some of the other posts.. i take it back.. parents do have a say in the matter -- especially the younger years. Some of these kids shouldve been slapped for their comments, especially if the parents are present. Who is in charge here?? My mother wouldve tore me up if I acted like that to anyone...

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