Unfriended for being too fat?

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Replies

  • yoli_bee
    yoli_bee Posts: 27
    This is a weight loss site (although it seems people use it as a dating site and some kind of ego boost, but whatever...if you can't get in any place else) it's so illogical to delete someone for being "too fat." Sorry you had to deal with that!
  • Lucianna_D
    Lucianna_D Posts: 84 Member
    She did you a favor by deleted herself.. You deserve better people in you life.. :))
  • CynthiaElise
    CynthiaElise Posts: 262 Member
    People are mean. I'm sorry that happened to you. But, honestly, you are better off. Everyone on here is trying to work on, or work through, something. I've seen people on here posting about weight loss, weight gain, balance, breakups, makeups, work, school - essentially, all the stuff that makes us human. It's weird to me that someone would want to so strictly categorize who they want to associate with based on how much they need to lose.

    There are some really awesome people here who just want to be positive and helpful and those are the people worth spending your time on.

    I am so glad we're friends :):heart:
  • sportytalldoll
    sportytalldoll Posts: 208 Member
    Three words:

    KARMA's a B*T*H!

    And that chick is gonna meet someone, someday who see's her uglitude in real life and lets her know just how low of a person she is.
  • bailuna
    bailuna Posts: 56
    No time for people like that.

    I have over 100lbs to lose. I'll gladly be your friend and support you through this! <3

    As long as people are supportive, polite, and kind, I'll friend anyone. I'm not here to judge ... just here to support and be supported. :)
  • themommie
    themommie Posts: 5,033 Member
    aren't we all on here for the same reason, to lose weight and get healthy? We all start somewhere and we will all be in her same category of 15-25 lbs to lose and then we will eventually all be at our goal. Aren't we all on here to support , encourage and motivate each other along the way and gain insight and encouragement as well ?

    MY BAD I guess I just assumed we were all on here for the same reason.....
  • FitLink
    FitLink Posts: 1,317 Member
    I received a friend request a few days ago along with a message from the person..I'm not including the whole message, but this was part of it
    They say you lose more weight if you have friends to help motivate you. I liked your post and maybe we can motivate each other. I don't have much to say to people who have to lose 100 pounds or so because I have enough of a fear of being fat so that between 20 and 25 pounds is the limit that happens to me before I start back down.

    I had accepted the request and replied to her that I was one of "those" people who needed to lose close to 100 lbs and how that came about. I was nice about it and today I realize she's unfriended me...really? I guess I'm fortunate I've made it this far in life without dealing with discrimination...but from someone that also needs to lose weight? All I can say is..wow.

    I think it says it all that she is worried about not having much to say TO people who have 100 pounds to lose, rather than worrying about what she might learn from others. I'm also a little worried that someone has a full-blown phobia about becoming fat. Is that REALLY the worst thing she can think of to have happen to her? Because I have cancer, and it's WAY WORSE than being fat.

    She really probably didn't have anything to offer you anyway. I wouldn't lose sleep about it.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
    You can't change bat *kitten* crazy.... Consider yourself lucky to have been deleted.
  • bertabird
    bertabird Posts: 52
    Wow! That is crazy. MFP is about being on the right track to lose weight. This person obviously is on here for different reasons. I understand fears, but to exclude people because of the fear is absolutely her loss. I wish you well with YOUR journey. Stay on track, keep on doing good things, eat right and live your healthy lifestyle. NEVER take an "unfriending" seriously. Some will unfriend you and some you may end up unfriending. Just enjoy being on MFP!
  • lollilady
    lollilady Posts: 18 Member
    there are plenty of people here who will be happy to be your friend with no conditions. you dont need to subscribe to her issues :)

    i totally agree i myself have 94lbs to lose u dont need people like that please feel free to add me anytime i need all the motivation i can get
  • quickchekgal
    quickchekgal Posts: 213 Member
    What a jerk! Forget about that person!!
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    People are mean. I'm sorry that happened to you. But, honestly, you are better off. Everyone on here is trying to work on, or work through, something. I've seen people on here posting about weight loss, weight gain, balance, breakups, makeups, work, school - essentially, all the stuff that makes us human. It's weird to me that someone would want to so strictly categorize who they want to associate with based on how much they need to lose.

    There are some really awesome people here who just want to be positive and helpful and those are the people worth spending your time on.

    I am so glad we're friends :):heart:

    Me too. Thank you for all of your support. You are one of the awesome ones :flowerforyou:
  • 519harley
    519harley Posts: 241 Member
    WHAT????? That's ridiculous. Please add me, I'll be more than happy to have you as my friend, Karen
  • angeeishere
    angeeishere Posts: 89 Member
    I agree. Screw her sorry *kitten*.

    I'm proud to be your friend.

    Totally agree!
  • Bravyn
    Bravyn Posts: 57 Member
    WOW! That's awful. Aren't we here to support each other? I could care less if someone has 5 or 200lbs to lose. We all have similar goals.
  • paintlisapurple
    paintlisapurple Posts: 982 Member
    Um odd, but okayyyyyyyyyy. I suppose everyone has their own way of "dealing" with things. I would just say "whatever" and concentrate on all of the people here who are willing to give and accept support and friendship.
  • cmpollard01
    cmpollard01 Posts: 246
    People continue to amaze me! In all truth, losing ANY amount of weight can be frustrating, difficult, and downright aggravating-couldn't we ALL use support and encouragement?!

    Keep rocking on your journey, and just let us all know if you need some encouragement, or a kind word. The majority of folks here (regardless of how much they have left to lose) are really awesome!
  • ekking69
    ekking69 Posts: 44
    Wow. It's not like having you as a friend was costing her anything! Anyone losing weight should support another, regardless of how much they have to lose.

    That being said, as another with 100 pounds to lose, I would love to replace her in your friends list. We can all use as much support as we can get.

    BTW, I have people on my friend list that have NOTHING to lose and are just using this to keep track of their calories and workouts. But they are still here to support.
  • Marla64
    Marla64 Posts: 23,120 Member
    Personally-- I think the whole "friend" thing is stupid, insofar as having a list of people you barely know. As you go through your time here, you will no doubt connect with people with whom you'll just click-- they will be your friends. Not this list of people who like a post and send you a silly request.

    I've been here a long time, and my friends list is very small-- they're the people I've come to know and love, many of whom I've met.

    Bottom line-- don't let the lunacy of strangers here get to you-- stay on target. You're on a mission to get healthy-- who cares if some nutwad clicked you off a silly list?
  • CLShrader2
    CLShrader2 Posts: 46 Member
    Wow! That is absurd! I have close to 100lbs to lose as well. (92.5lbs to be exact) I've lost 40 so far, but still have a bunch to go! Only keep the supportive people in your life and on your friends list!
  • FitLink
    FitLink Posts: 1,317 Member
    i unfriend people all the time for not eating the way i do. if they're not active. if they have views i don't agree with, etc.

    i don't see the big deal.

    I can see unfriending people who aren't active, or have different views, etc. But because they've got more to lose than you do, that's childish. I can see unfriending someone who eats crappy and then has to work their tail off to burn those calories off because obviously, they're not taking this seriously. Or someone who thinks starvation mode is the way to go... I get that do. So I do have to ask (and hopefully you'll answer); What do you mean by "not eating the way I do?"

    REALLY? You don't want to be friends with people whose food choices differ from yours? And what harm is there if a friend isn't active for a while? Seriously.
  • mzfiyaa
    mzfiyaa Posts: 94 Member
    2 bad for her that is horrible to delete someone because of there weightloss goal.....Dont feel bad thr are a lot of us on here that wants to lose 100 pounds or more and would love to be friends.....Dont worry or stress about it...
  • mistigoodwin
    mistigoodwin Posts: 411 Member
    You don't need friends like that anyway!!! Her loss!
  • StirFriedGiblets
    StirFriedGiblets Posts: 89
    I received a friend request a few days ago along with a message from the person..I'm not including the whole message, but this was part of it
    They say you lose more weight if you have friends to help motivate you. I liked your post and maybe we can motivate each other. I don't have much to say to people who have to lose 100 pounds or so because I have enough of a fear of being fat so that between 20 and 25 pounds is the limit that happens to me before I start back down.

    I had accepted the request and replied to her that I was one of "those" people who needed to lose close to 100 lbs and how that came about. I was nice about it and today I realize she's unfriended me...really? I guess I'm fortunate I've made it this far in life without dealing with discrimination...but from someone that also needs to lose weight? All I can say is..wow.

    Some people genuinely have a fear for fat people. One CBT session I had, the therapist said the person who needed help couldn't bear to be in the same room as her because she was fat.
  • SassyCalyGirl
    SassyCalyGirl Posts: 1,932 Member
    perhaps you should ask her WHY she deleted you instead of jumping to conclusions. I know for me-I want friends with "similar" fitness and weight goals-as it is hard for me to understand what it would be like to have a lot of weight to lose. Not saying I would delete someone for that reason but I would hesitate accepting a request if our goals were vastly different.

    typically-I only delete people that don't offer the same support I do.
  • MelissaE27
    MelissaE27 Posts: 682 Member
    Wow you are better off.. more deserving people out there who would love to support you!.. Please add me... love my friends :)
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    i unfriend people all the time for not eating the way i do. if they're not active. if they have views i don't agree with, etc.

    i don't see the big deal.

    I can see unfriending people who aren't active, or have different views, etc. But because they've got more to lose than you do, that's childish. I can see unfriending someone who eats crappy and then has to work their tail off to burn those calories off because obviously, they're not taking this seriously. Or someone who thinks starvation mode is the way to go... I get that do. So I do have to ask (and hopefully you'll answer); What do you mean by "not eating the way I do?"

    i do a ketogenic diet. it's hard to be friends with 'calorie counters'. they mean well, but sometimes their ideas on meals/snacks just aren't what i need. it's nothing personal! i just want friends with similar goals.
  • gr8grl68
    gr8grl68 Posts: 417 Member
    I notice on MFP that there is a distinction between those who have 20lbs or less to lose, the people in between, and then the obese people who have 100lbs or more to lose. I don't really give a crap anymore. I'm on here to lose weight, plan on losing it, and if you can't support that, leave me the hell alone.


    THIS!!! ^^^^:drinker:
  • SassyCalyGirl
    SassyCalyGirl Posts: 1,932 Member
    i unfriend people all the time for not eating the way i do. if they're not active. if they have views i don't agree with, etc.

    i don't see the big deal.

    I can see unfriending people who aren't active, or have different views, etc. But because they've got more to lose than you do, that's childish. I can see unfriending someone who eats crappy and then has to work their tail off to burn those calories off because obviously, they're not taking this seriously. Or someone who thinks starvation mode is the way to go... I get that do. So I do have to ask (and hopefully you'll answer); What do you mean by "not eating the way I do?"

    i do a ketogenic diet. it's hard to be friends with 'calorie counters'. they mean well, but sometimes their ideas on meals/snacks just aren't what i need. it's nothing personal! i just want friends with similar goals.

    maybe your on the wrong site if you find it hard to be friends with calorie counters!
  • myfitnessval
    myfitnessval Posts: 687 Member
    how are you sure she unfriended you because you are fat? i've unfreinded people for a number of reasons, they werent eating enough and it was becoming clear they were trying to hide an eating disorder, or because they were being inconsistent with logging daily, or because they repeatedly kept "falling off the wagon" and leaving for days/weeks at a time. she probably had other reasons for deleting you.

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