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Bite me, Couch to 5K - Week 3!

Posts: 126 Member
edited December 2024 in Success Stories
“Ding! Begin Walking”

The lady voice of Week 3, Day 1 of Couch to 5k wasn't reassuring as she commanded my 5-minute warm-up walk. I know what this day meant. I’d already looked ahead to what she was going to ask me to do today: FOUR THREE-MINUTE RUNS!?!?!?! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?

For the record, two weeks ago I couldn't run half a block. Granted, by last week lady voice got me up to two-minute runs – which impressed the CRAP out of me – but now THREE MINUTES? My excuses-per-second generator speeds up as the first of the three-minute runs approach:
I’m 53! I'm morbidly obese! My joints hurt! I have a hiatal hernia! I'm diabetic!

“Ding! RUN!”

OK, you stupid smartphone app, I’ll run. Here I go. 13-minute pace. Slow. Who cares? I’m moving and that’s good enough. My feet go: plop, plop, plop. The cruel, uncaring app counts down the three-minute run:

“Ding! One Minute!”

WTF? That’s only one minute? I’ll never make three minutes. I’m dying here! I can’t get enough air! My heart rate is too high! Ouch, I stepped on a pebble! How the hell am I supposed to…Oh, look! A pretty girl…

“Ding! Two Minutes!”

My android phone must be powerful as it is clearly warping the space-time continuum cuz’ there is NO GOD DAMN WAY I've only been running for 120 seconds. But it’s OK as I know sweet death will soon wrap itself around me, my corpse left on the side of the street. Woodland creatures will walk by and quietly mourn me. I will be at peace. My head is spinning. Yet my feet are moving… time is lost on me…
COME TAKE ME BROTHER DEATH! INTO THY HANDS…

“Ding! Walk!”

Was...that…a ding I heard? Does that mean…I DID IT? I did! I ran for three minutes. Nee Ner Nee Ner! I’m walking now, breathing hard with hands on my hips. Recovering.

Meh. That was easy. Only three more of those? No problem.

Go away Brother Death. Mr. Healthy does not need you now!

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Replies

  • Posts: 215 Member
    way to go!
  • Love this, you may have even inspired me to download the app :) so well written and well done on your first 3 minute runs (I can't even do 1)
  • Posts: 1,903 Member
    Awesome post! Great job for getting through!
  • Posts: 245 Member
    Thank you for the laugh!! Good for you for staying with it!! One more win for Mr. Healthy!!
  • Posts: 45 Member
    This is the best thing I've heard all day :) WAY TO GO!!! >:)
  • Posts: 5,926 Member
    Love it! Every week is an accomplishment. Every week, your body does things you never thought possible. Way to go!
  • Posts: 152 Member
    way to go congratulations! You are not the weakest link!
  • Posts: 2,122 Member
    edited October 2014
    msf74 wrote: »
    That was hilarious...Well done (on the writing and your achievement.)

    Just wait till you get to Week 5...
    +1. Can't wait to hear your story about the first 20 min run ;)
    Congrats, by the way, - you did great!
  • Posts: 20 Member
    Love this so much! I'm redoing C25K for the zillionth time (laziness, Southern summer, pregnancy, etc.) and I know exactly how you feel, and will be feeling exactly like it in two weeks.
    Excellent work!
  • Posts: 111 Member
    edited October 2014
    Love it! Great post and keep going strong on the C25K. You can do it! I completed this a couple months back and I never thought I would be able to do it. I just listened to the lady on the app (which on some days I liked and some days I hated!!) and kept going forward. My husband just finished the program last week as well. Poor husband though... he had two female voices telling him what to do during his runs!!! (me and the app) >:)
  • Posts: 256 Member
    That was hilarious because I can totally relate.
    What makes us listen to that silly lady?!
  • Posts: 19 Member
    That was so funny! I'm doing this program too and last night I told my kids that the best part about running is being done! They are too young and energetic to get it.
  • Posts: 3,103 Member
    Love it!

    Stay at it, it only gets easier and really helped me get the weight off. The closer you get to your proper weight the easier it gets. You will know you have this when you start to seek out hills. Good luck.
  • Posts: 339 Member
    Awesome! The killer one for me is when I suddenly had to do 20 minutes, non-stop... it seemed like an enormous jump!
  • Posts: 374 Member
    haha! This was completely awesome! Bravo! I did not know there was an App!!!
  • Posts: 191 Member
    I love this post not only for the honest humor of it but the reality of our getting started and not thinking we can do it and when we do we feel the glory of success ever so small. Good Job buddy
  • Posts: 7,719 Member
    That is tooooo funny!!!!! Thank you for the laugh!
  • Posts: 121 Member
    You're awesome. Week 4 was like this for me. I finished the program months ago. You can do it!
  • Posts: 522 Member
    Wtg! :D
  • Posts: 412 Member
    Fantastic! And so spot on! I'm just finishing C25K (one more run until graduation!) and still berate the 5k101 guy with a lot of "you must be kidding me"s :smile:
  • Posts: 73 Member
    Hilarious! I've been feeling the same way about that app but I'm on week 7 now and determined to finish....no matter how slow I go! Great job!!
  • Posts: 145 Member
    LOVE this! :joy:
  • Posts: 418 Member
    hahaha! Too funny and I remember that feeling when I did C25K!
    Congrats on your progress.
  • Posts: 790 Member
    desweds wrote: »
    “Ding! Begin Walking”

    The ladyvoice of Week 3, Day 1 of Couch to 5k wasn't reassuring as she commanded my 5 minute warm up walk. I know what this day meant. I’d already looked ahead to what she was going to ask me to do today: FOUR THREE-MINUTE RUNS!?!?!?! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?

    For the record, two weeks ago I couldn't run half a block. Granted, by last week ladyvoice got me up to two minutes runs – which impressed the CRAP out of me – but now THREE MINUTES? My excuses-per-second generator speeds up as the first of the three-minute runs approach:
    I’m 53! I'm morbidly obese! My joints hurt! I have a hiatal hernia! I'm diabetic!

    “Ding! RUN!”

    OK, you stupid smartphone app, I’ll run. Here I go. 13 minute pace. Slow. Who cares? I’m moving and that’s good enough. My feet go: plop, plop, plop. The cruel, uncaring app counts down the three minute run:

    “Ding! One Minute!”

    WTF? That’s only one minute? I’ll never make three minutes. I’m dying here! I can’t get enough air! My heart rate is too high! Ouch, I stepped on a pebble! How the hell am I supposed to…Oh look! A pretty girl…

    “Ding! Two Minutes!”

    My android phone must be powerful as it is clearly warping the space time continuum cuz’ there is NO GOD DAMN WAY I've only been running for 120 seconds. But it’s OK as I know sweet death will soon wrap itself around me, my corpse left on the side of the street. Woodland creatures will walk by and quietly mourn me. I will be at peace. My head is spinning. Yet my feet are moving… time is lost on me…
    COME TAKE ME BROTHER DEATH! INTO THY HANDS…

    “Ding! Walk!”

    Was...that…a ding I heard? Does that mean…I DID IT? I did! I ran three minutes. Nee Ner Nee Ner! I’m walking now, breathing hard with hands on my hips. Recovering.

    Meh. That was easy. Only three more of those? No problem.

    Go away Brother Death. Mr. Healthy does not need you now!

    You are awesome! I cannot wait to read your account of when you run 5K, lol. And I know you'll do it.
  • Posts: 13,049 Member
    desweds wrote: »
    “Ding! Walk!”

    Was...that…a ding I heard? Does that mean…I DID IT? I did! I ran three minutes. Nee Ner Nee Ner! I’m walking now, breathing hard with hands on my hips. Recovering.

    Meh. That was easy. Only three more of those? No problem.

    Go away Brother Death. Mr. Healthy does not need you now!


    Ha ha! Love this. Great job Mr. Healthy. Keep it up.
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