Spa owner yells at Mom of Autistic child-Facebook Firestorm
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Listening to both sides of a story will convince you that there is more to a story than both sides.
think what happened is wrong
baby was sitting in mom's lap so think mom was doing her best to keep child from crying
sadly mom was yeld at anyways
enough said
done with this thread
???? How many sides does a story have? Is it like an octagon?0 -
Yelling at the mother of ANY crying child is inappropriate. She was already feeling uncomfortable enough. Yelling at a customer in your business is also inappropriate. Yelling at a customer with a crying child IN FRONY of other custoers is plain ignorant! Give me a break! It's a service industry. Post rules about no children allowed. Treat one another with respect! Try to help mom distract the child! There are a hundred other things she could have tried! The one posting should have spoken up then and there! That's all I am saying! (I think
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My son is autistic with Sensory Integration Disorder.
He is extremely sensitive to getting his haircut along with many other external stimulators.
He cannot process them like most kids and it upsets him greatly.
Having a child with special needs is ostracizing enough without incidents like this.
A little public education would go a long way.
Perhaps a better scenario to limit the child's stimuli would be to ask the compassionate hair dresser to cut his hair at home. Not trying to ostracize anyone. I just think that would be the best scenario for the child. Give the hairdresser cash. She doesn't have to split it with the insensitive salon owner. It would be a win-win for all concerned. I live in a small town. My hair dresser would do it for me if my child had melt downs at a salon.0 -
So help me...
...but if this thread rolls before being mod-locked/nuked...
...I will kick a puppy.
(/notsrs :flowerforyou: )0 -
this hahI can't wait for this train wreck of a thread rolls to a new one, so this can drop down my list of threads.0 -
Disgusting.
Love ALL the babies.
Who said anything bad about babies?
I've had a couple of HUNDRED "babies", all of them had either paws or hooves, and none of them ever had a meltdown in public. That's the kind I prefer.0 -
My son is autistic with Sensory Integration Disorder.
He is extremely sensitive to getting his haircut along with many other external stimulators.
He cannot process them like most kids and it upsets him greatly.
Having a child with special needs is ostracizing enough without incidents like this.
A little public education would go a long way.
Perhaps a better scenario to limit the child's stimuli would be to ask the compassionate hair dresser to cut his hair at home. Not trying to ostracize anyone. I just think that would be the best scenario for the child. Give the hairdresser cash. She doesn't have to split it with the insensitive salon owner. It would be a win-win for all concerned. I live in a small town. My hair dresser would do it for me if my child had melt downs at a salon.
I did mention in a subsequent post that I took my son to the same hairdresser I've been going to for over 20 years.
The familiarity and consistency helped him to be more calm and build trust.
He never did like getting his haircut, but with both of us working together we were able to give him a positive experience and get a nice cut
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Disgusting.
Love ALL the babies.
Who said anything bad about babies?
I've had a couple of HUNDRED "babies", all of them had either paws or hooves, and none of them ever had a meltdown in public. That's the kind I prefer.
Well then you have been blessed because my "babies" with paws are a lot harder to control at times! Especially if my kids are out and someone comes zooming by on a 4 wheeler. They will attack quickly to protect THEIR babies! They only bark and are harmless but that bark can be intimidating.0 -
this hahI can't wait for this train wreck of a thread rolls to a new one, so this can drop down my list of threads.
Glad I am not the only one that feels this way0 -
Michelle Mott, owner of M-Spa Salon & Day Spa, released a statement Thursday saying her "actions were not intended to create any hardship or embarrassment for little Grayson and his parents.
“To say that the last few days at M-Spa have been challenging is an understatement. We are all aware of the significant attention given to a Facebook posting regarding a recent haircut for one of our spa’s youngest customers. Social media has been used to create an impression of me and this event in ways which do not fairly reflect who I am and which seek to silence differing viewpoints about what occurred. While this is very unfortunate, I am not going to review those differences here.
“Rather, I want to say that my actions were not intended to create any hardship or embarrassment for little Grayson or his parents. And while I believed that Grayson’s parents understood that, when Mrs. Bays stayed for her highlight and cut at our spa right after Grayson had left with his father, I want to reassure the Bays family of this point. I apologize to Grayson and the Bays for any embarrassment or hardship that they have experienced by my actions.
“We look forward to better days ahead and we will continue to strive to be the best spa in southwest Michigan. To those who have voiced displeasure with me or with my spa over this incident, I will work hard to regain your faith in our services. To those who have indicated that my business should be boycotted, I would ask only that you consider the impact of such a boycott upon the many families who derive some portion or all of their livelihood from our spa. To those who have withheld judgment or have voiced support over the last few days, including my treasured customers and employees, I extend my heartfelt appreciation.”0 -
Owners these days got to be liberal to understand the differences.
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upscale spa, her business, her rules. dont bring kids...
I am wondering what kind of spa it was... at the spas I go to where I spend over $100 it's supposed to be a relaxing atmosphere and I don't know why anyone would bring kids. I would be mad if I spent $100 to have someone bring their kid, autistic or not, just so I can hear crying during my manicure.
Although if it is a place that offers kids haircuts, then crying kids could be expected.
Also don't see what being autistic has to do with it. Sounds like she didn't know he was autistic before she yelled, so she wasn't yelling at him for being autistic, and children without autism cry all the time during haircuts anyway.
very good points.. and everyone here is being way too anally PC about a point that didnt matter. The owner didnt say get that special kid outta here. the owner was mad the kid was being too loud and the parent failed to control it.
plain and simple. yet you "sick" people wanna make a mountain out of a mole hill.
parent should take the kid to super cuts, not a upscale spa.
1. There are no rules that children are not allowed
2. The woman had been a client there for 2years and her son getting his hair cut there for the past year - the owner knew he was autistic
3. The status was written by a bystander who said he wasn't even being that loud
4. This owner has had made a reputation for herself over the past 5 years due to how poorly she treats clients. Her employees are what keeps her in business
5. A friend of mine has worked there for 5years - she resigned today because that incident was the final straw
1. silence is the golden rule of the spa
2. there is a broad spectrum of autism, we dont know if the kid had Rett syndrome, PDD-NOS, Asperger's and childhood disintegrative disorder. so we dont know if she was able to tell he was autistic by looks, or if the owner knew outright the info,since this was stated as newly being diagnosed. Also, she never said anything about the kids condition, just his behavior in her place of business.
3. its a spa, see golden rule number 1
4. its her business. her money, her life. if she made it past 1 year, she is doing it right.
5. in this economy, im sure the business owner had 40 applications to fill that one new paying seat
^Then why not you shut those lips of yours and suck my *kitten*! YOU KNOW NOTHING BOUT AWW TIS UMM!!0 -
I didnt read back through this post but I can relate. My oldest son (who is now 9) has high functining autism (but it wasnt so high functioning when he was younger) and a hair cut, grocery shopping, hell, putting his sock on him if the seams wernt lines up was pure HELL. He would scream and bite and scratch himself. If we were in public, some people probably thought I as beating on him. Going through it yourself, really gives life a new perspective, and Patience!0
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Well, I know how the mother feels because my son is also autistic and non-verbal. Upon doing research, I discovered that the reason why my son cries when he gets a haircut is because the clippers feels like needles piercing his head, on top of the noise from the clippers being amplified, since some autistics have amplified hearing, where they can hear the overhead lights clicking, a person's watch ticking, and the sound of music from the speakers all at one time. Can you imagine this and not being able to tune this out because your body cannot do so? I mean anyone would go into sensory overload, but neurotypical people are able to block out and filter certain noises, that autistics cannot block out.
Concerning my son, we have went through 3 barbers because most of them were unsympathetic or would stall with conversation instead of making the hair cutting process as quick as possible. We finally found a barber, who has other autistic clients, who is wonderful to my son. My son always cries when he is in the chair, and he is 6 years old now. I always have to hold him while in the chair, to soothe him. People are always staring at us because my son cries and rips the cape off and tries to escape.
I even thought about purchasing a good pair of clippers and attempting to cut his hair myself, but I don't have the extra help to hold him, while I cut it.
But, the fact that this owner embarrassed this mother due to her lack of sympathy towards autistic children and their parents is mortifying to say the least. If the owner was to even live one day in that mother's shoes and all the care that is involved with a child who is autistic, she would not have dared to say one word to her. But often times, that is what it takes, an intolerant person to walk a mile in someone else's shoes first, before they understand what that person goes through day to day.
All I can say is that I commend that mother for "keeping her cool" because I would have went off on that owner, and her mouth would have dropped because she would not have known that she picked on the wrong person on the wrong day...0 -
I didnt read back through this post but I can relate. My oldest son (who is now 9) has high functining autism (but it wasnt so high functioning when he was younger) and a hair cut, grocery shopping, hell, putting his sock on him if the seams wernt lines up was pure HELL. He would scream and bite and scratch himself. If we were in public, some people probably thought I as beating on him. Going through it yourself, really gives life a new perspective, and Patience!
Girl, I know what you mean, and for me, lots of praying...0 -
Oh no. I would have said something, though I am a man so I may be more quick to anger. Wait I say short people are quick to anger since the anger has less room to travel.
It is so sad that people would be so cold, and not understand that the mother didnt wish to have a child born with autism, the child didnt wish to be born that way. There are things in this world that are completely out of your control. To bash a child let alone one with autism is sickening. If there is a cause to be upset at, this is one of them. Where is the group Autism Speak on this issue?
out of all this, I would think there might be a niche market for a hair and nail salon that openly and is geared towards people with autism and their families.
Definitely, salons, daycares, and how about hiring higher functioning autistics and aspies to work in the salon as employees?0 -
The owner didnt know the kid was autistic and in assuming this was just a normal kid playing up had every right to tell the parent to keep it under control in her spa if she felt it was disturbing other clients....
Cant see the fuss other than the facebook "hang em high" brigade getting off on one and the whole incident reminds me of a time someone jumped in front of me at a checkout and having verbally reprimanded them the " he s got problems card" was pulled by people with him as if that made it all right and i should have known ...
I m off to the spa now in full support !0 -
I disagree. for 1. with the alarmingly high dianosis rates and publicity about autism.. I think everyone should be aware that mot kids are not just bad.. if they are acting out to such a degree as this.. there may be an underlying issue of some sort.
And
2. If you are going to allow kids in your salon, you cant go around being nasty to thier parents.. even if they get out of hand... I maybe would have tried to distract the kid with a sucker or comb or magazine.. or try talking to the kid. Not yell at the parent. Thats just rude.0 -
I disagree. for 1. with the alarmingly high dianosis rates and publicity about autism.. I think everyone should be aware that mot kids are not just bad.. if they are acting out to such a degree as this.. there may be an underlying issue of some sort.
And
2. If you are going to allow kids in your salon, you cant go around being nasty to thier parents.. even if they get out of hand... I maybe would have tried to distract the kid with a sucker or comb or magazine.. or try talking to the kid. Not yell at the parent. Thats just rude.
Like I said, until they have walked a mile in the shoes of a parent raising an autistic child, they will never understand. And if they could walk a mile in our shoes, they would not even be able to finish it. As a matter of fact, I think most would just bow out of the race and hand the shoes back over to us because they would be in such amazement, how we even cope day to day, let alone have the ambition to want to get up in the morning and do it all over again. Like they say, "Ignorance is bliss."0
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