We broke up because...

angelique_redhead

I was too old for him.

Spnneil06

The walker wasn't sexy!

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

She always wanted to cover me in food then say she wouldn't eat me because she is on a diet.

Spnneil06

He tasted funny!

LivyMarie93

She cursed me out because I wouldn't cook human stew for her

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Didn't like to cook my favorite food.

LivyMarie93

Wanted his favorite food every single day

Unknown

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GFitMan

Wasabi on my privates is not the in thing

LivyMarie93

Doesn't like the taste of doggy biscuits

GFitMan

Tried to feed me doggy biscuits -

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Wasn't into RUFFhousing.

GFitMan

RUFFled my feathers too much

LivyMarie93

Was wayyyy too comical for me

angelique_redhead

Couldn't compete with all that beauty.

skahtboi

Never believed in her ability to compete with others

Unknown

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asianfashionista86

wouldn't stop wearing mankinis

SuzyQAzureblue

he liked beer I liked Moscato

Allison1385

Didn't know how to fold a fitted sheet ...lol

Stardog_Champion

She couldn't pass a blood test despite studying

skahtboi

Had this unusual Minion fetish

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Didn't like minions.

FabulousFantasticFifty

He died his hair red so he could steal my Identity!

slimgirljo15

Wouldn't let me touch her legs ...she had them insured for millions

LivyMarie93

She left me for Flo from Progressive

Hey_Its_That_One_Guy

Couldn't save me money on my car insurance.

slimgirljo15

If I beg will you take me back

kjm3579

slimgirljo15 wrote: »

If I beg will you take me back

We never broke up so I don't have to worry about taking you back

slimgirljo15

True one can never leave ones Dear Heart