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We broke up because...
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She said " let's make woopie" and I thought she said " let's make wookie" and I spent the whole night screaming like Chewbacca0
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He wanted to wear a Darth Vader mask in bed0
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She wouldn't cum to the dark side0
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She always made me blush0
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Tried to kiss my toosh in public..of course I blushed0
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Umm he was a dude0
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Damn ..said no to 3somes0
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Didn't believe in monogamy0
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Didn't like mahogany0
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Was always trying to decorate in mahogany, even the dog was spray-painted to match0
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Spent all his time in front of the mirror0
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Decided canned tuna was too canny so we had to get a fish tank of tuna to feed his fish addiction0
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He collected toe nails in jars0
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She liked to lay on the couch and take selfies all day0
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Kept grinning at me...started to freak me out ..0
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gave me those bed room eyes all the time..0
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Every time I looked at her she wanted some Sexy time!0
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Wouldn't put out0
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was always putting out for anyone who wanted it0
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Had some objection over my Generous "Love"!0
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trying to spread her LOVE to everyone but me
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She spread her crabs to me...ewww0
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She didnt like Sea Food!0
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Well there was this rash.....she didn't really explain it ..0
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I was allergic to cats and she was Queen of the Cat Ladies!0
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I was allergic to her puss..er cat0
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He kept calling it a cat0
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She insisted on staring at me0
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He didn't like my eyes0
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Here eyes were always on my crotch
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