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We broke up because...
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Refused to offer me dessert. Think she thought I needed to take some weight off.0
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Stole my jar of cherries and I caught her feeding them to The mailman...tsk tsk0
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Left my fat free ice cream on the counter....
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She wasn't the sweet and innocent girl I knew0
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Found her with the mailman on our counter0
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Secretly was FBI...0
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Lost us the foosball tournament.0
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she got lipstick on everything0
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Wouldn't sail on all tides0
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He was just...well..you know..0
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was too cryptic, never knew what she was thinking...0
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He was too perfect0
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was too cute, my heart exploded and I died of happiness0
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She was a couch potato 0
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Always shoving potatoes at me..she knew I was on a low carb diet..just cruel0
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I don't want to talk about it. Still sad0
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Depressed all the time0
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Kept singing......my humps, my humps, my humps0
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Had an unnatural obsession with camels...0
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She wanted a dude..and I wasnt
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Sent me to a Dude ranch0
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She never came home from dude ranch0
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Misunderstood what a dude ranch was... Though we were going on a sex holiday.0
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Made up Holidays.
There no such thing as Sexday!!!0 -
Had to convince her Sexday was a real holiday to get any...0
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