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We broke up because...
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She wanted to name our 6th born child Damien.0
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I never saw his face0
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She always made me wear a brown paper bag over my head when we'd get "intimate". Wouldn't even let me poke an airhole in the front.0
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He wouldn't keep the damn bag over his head. Who needs to breathe anyway...1
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He only wore that bag once..yep..virtually no sexy time..I think he was getting it elsewhere..0
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because all she ever wanted to do with me is get nekkid, and I want to be loved for my mind....1
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He wouldn't stop talking about his beanie baby collection0
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He wore his beanie everywhere.. even to bed.0
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She always wanted to wear the pants too0
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Refused to take her pants off - ever.0
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Wanted me pantsless all the time..then wondered why we got kicked out ofchurch0
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Kept shouting out I want you now in church0
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She wouldnt come home from Church....ever0
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I thought he was Captain America and turns out he was just Batman!1
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She ..its too awful..I just can't repeat it0
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She had a lot of gas. The smell was awful!!0
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Blamed me and the dog for his gas0
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Fed me a steady diet of baked beans0
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Ate tons of baked beans but always smelt like cabbage0
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Wouldn't let me in her cabbage patch0
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He kept stealing my leather gear and my bike.. It was kinda awkward cause my gear is kinda tight on me and he's a lot taller than I am :P0
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She killed my cow Bessy so she could make some new leather pants!0
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she preferred to sleep with the cow instead of sleeping in our bed with me0
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She didn't like that I was a Cowgirl!0
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She played country and western on the radio 24/70
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She wouldn't let me buy an iPod0
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Always wasting our money0
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She wanted us to live in her Datsun0
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she wanted to live in Datsun, and travel every month to Arizona0
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