We broke up because...
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I found out that she was conjoined with another Chick!
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She was just too much of an angry feminist . Pity she bought into the bull$hit . A free thinker is my cup of tea .0
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He had a small mind and hands to match his hero!
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Her men V women thing was getting so old . The us V them was just too much . Life is too short i kept telling her .0
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She lost that lovin' feelin'0
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She hid the remote control0
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I died and he wasn't into long distance relationships0
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She thought she was more badass than me!0
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She could handle a little challenge in her life!0
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Always jealous of other women around me0
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He was jealous of my dog0
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She insisted we wear matching pajamas...even when we weren't at home0
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He didn't like the matching slippers I bought us0
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Her matching obsessions were too much to handle0
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She tried to hook up with my twin sister and couldn't handle the both of us!0
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Never unclogged the plug hole in the bath from her hair
And caused me to call a plumber each week0 -
He forgets that I'm a Plumber, Electrician and Carpenter and can fix things!1
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Because she had a secret double life working as a plumber, electrician a carpenter
And kept all the extra money to go out partying0 -
Although we agreed on politics, race and religion, we disagreed on gender preference...0
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He kept telling me what to do so I had to throw him out.0
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She was free spirited, didn't seem fair to limit her0
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We had different interpretations of the word infidelity.0
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He didn't like my fuzzy pink handcuffs0
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She always wanted me to open the car door for her but I owned a motorcycle...0
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She was constantly annoyed by my subtle idiosyncrasies...like me forgetting anniversaries, birthdays, her first name - things like that...0
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