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We broke up because...
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He didn't like the schedule I made for my boyfriends0
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He was all of the sudden sensitive to light and getting a little long in the tooth0
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I caught her with the pool guy. We don't even have a pool.1
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She was holding hands with another0
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"I gave her my heart but she wanted my soul..."0
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he thought I said soul...I really said sole. I was hungry and he never fed me1
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she spit in my Koolaid.0
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He drank someone else's Kool-aid0
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I was brainwashed... she had me drinking her Kool-aid!0
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he literally washed his brain every day. It was a combination of gross and bizarre I couldn't take it anymore0
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He was always letting his brain hang out!0
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She thought I was her dancing puppet0
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She thought I was a "she" and she never let me play with her puppets!1
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He kept on insisting to take photos of us everywhere we go. And took a thousand shots every time until he got his smile just perfect.0
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I wasn't good enough, so he kicked me to the curb0
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She didn't like my glasses!0
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Apparently, gender was an issue for him...1
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I didn't make moves fast enough0
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They didn't like reading0
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She couldn't fly0
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She used Spotify for her musical needs while I was team #8Track...1
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He had a chip on his shoulder0
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She would bite my shoulder during ... left huge bite marks... said she saw "chips" there0
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I've been known to do that. It's only purple for a few days.
He's was being a little sissy girl on me0 -
She wouldn't sit on my lap0
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He worked as an ice cream man in a white paneled van , telling girls to sit on his lap for their ice cream treats .0
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lol She ate all of my ice cream1
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He gave me an Ice cream headache0
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She had brain freezes all the time0
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