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We broke up because...
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I guess I'm gonna Bump too!
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She was always breaking me with her “bumping”0
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Lies!!! It was the other way around!
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FabulousFantasticFifty wrote: »Lies!!! It was the other way around!
Here’s my proof!
Anddd yeahhh this photo is from the side and NOT my kneecap
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Too hairy
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Made me wax my chest0
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She was looking for a cub but I wasn't young enough0
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She left me for dead when it was just Turkey Coma0
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Wouldn't ever let me see her right eye0
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He kept making robot noises in bed0
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She didn't like my robot noises 0
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carried an 80's style Ghetto blaster everywhere.0
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He hit me with his guitar.. yelling "El Kabong"0
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Was too used to abusive relationships0
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0
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I wasn’t into heavy metal0
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Did not like my cooking0
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She wasn't as Sweet as she claimed to be
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Wouldn't order enough lipstick for both of us!
And drank all the coffee!0 -
Never appreciated when Id cook for him!0
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Tried to convince me that cyanide is just a seasoning0
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Didn't eat the Almond cookies I made special just for her!0
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She wouldn’t fund my trip to the Maldives0
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Ate all the crescent rolls.0
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She lived in an Orb0
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Couldn’t keep up with her on the dance floor1
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Refused to let me get 500 kittens0
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