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We broke up because...

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Replies

  • TEQWAR
    TEQWAR Posts: 1,616 Member
    He was still in love with his ex TEq :D:*

    Everybody is still in love with me! :D
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    TEQWAR wrote: »
    He was still in love with his ex TEq :D:*

    Everybody is still in love with me! :D

    He dangled his many conquests in front of me :'(
  • TEQWAR
    TEQWAR Posts: 1,616 Member
    She mistook my love-bulbs for conquests and didn't like it when I dangled them in front of her.
  • _fenrir
    _fenrir Posts: 96 Member
    Shaved my head and stole my blue hair dye
  • liftorgohome
    liftorgohome Posts: 25,455 Member
    Spent too much money on protein powders
  • liftorgohome
    liftorgohome Posts: 25,455 Member
    He was jealous of another bromance
  • Watching_The_Wheels
    Watching_The_Wheels Posts: 4,616 Member
    Scheduling conflicts...and also because we’re heterosexual
  • liftorgohome
    liftorgohome Posts: 25,455 Member
    All he did was stare at me
  • bigjuicy1234
    bigjuicy1234 Posts: 22,577 Member
    He only wanted to stare at himself in the mirror and take selfies
  • liftorgohome
    liftorgohome Posts: 25,455 Member
    He broke all of my mirrors when he looked into them
  • Keto_N_Iron
    Keto_N_Iron Posts: 5,385 Member
    Broke all the mirrors in his house and blamed them on someone else.
  • liftorgohome
    liftorgohome Posts: 25,455 Member
    He wore the same baseball shirt and hat all season
  • liftorgohome
    liftorgohome Posts: 25,455 Member
    He always rooted for the cheaters
  • Keto_N_Iron
    Keto_N_Iron Posts: 5,385 Member
    He's a patriots fan, nuff said
  • SojournerThirteen
    SojournerThirteen Posts: 28,204 Member
    He is obsessed with winning
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D
  • pogiguy05
    pogiguy05 Posts: 1,583 Member
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D

    She made me hungry
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D

    She made me hungry

    He was always hungry, but ate too often at the neighbours
  • pogiguy05
    pogiguy05 Posts: 1,583 Member
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D

    She made me hungry

    He was always hungry, but ate too often at the neighbours

    Cause she couldnt keep up with me so i had to find other outlets
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D

    She made me hungry

    He was always hungry, but ate too often at the neighbours

    Cause she couldnt keep up with me so i had to find other outlets

    Stuck his plug into any available outlet
  • pogiguy05
    pogiguy05 Posts: 1,583 Member
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D

    She made me hungry

    He was always hungry, but ate too often at the neighbours

    Cause she couldnt keep up with me so i had to find other outlets

    Stuck his plug into any available outlet

    Cause all her outlets were out of order
  • pogiguy05
    pogiguy05 Posts: 1,583 Member
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D

    She made me hungry

    He was always hungry, but ate too often at the neighbours

    Cause she couldnt keep up with me so i had to find other outlets

    Stuck his plug into any available outlet

    She was 220 and I was 110 it was never meant to be
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D

    She made me hungry

    He was always hungry, but ate too often at the neighbours

    Cause she couldnt keep up with me so i had to find other outlets

    Stuck his plug into any available outlet

    She was 220 and I was 110 it was never meant to be

    His plug fell off :o
  • pogiguy05
    pogiguy05 Posts: 1,583 Member
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D

    She made me hungry

    He was always hungry, but ate too often at the neighbours

    Cause she couldnt keep up with me so i had to find other outlets

    Stuck his plug into any available outlet

    She was 220 and I was 110 it was never meant to be

    His plug fell off :o

    She was to much voltage and would not accept my plug
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D

    She made me hungry

    He was always hungry, but ate too often at the neighbours

    Cause she couldnt keep up with me so i had to find other outlets

    Stuck his plug into any available outlet

    She was 220 and I was 110 it was never meant to be

    His plug fell off :o

    She was to much voltage and would not accept my plug

    Brought home crabs, not the eating variety
  • pogiguy05
    pogiguy05 Posts: 1,583 Member
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D

    She made me hungry

    He was always hungry, but ate too often at the neighbours

    Cause she couldnt keep up with me so i had to find other outlets

    Stuck his plug into any available outlet

    She was 220 and I was 110 it was never meant to be

    His plug fell off :o

    She was to much voltage and would not accept my plug

    Brought home crabs, not the eating variety

    WOW just WOW you want to back that bus up honey. Finish me off
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    pogiguy05 wrote: »
    He had this kinky fetish that involved a pineapple and roast pork.. I couldn't watch :D

    She made me hungry

    He was always hungry, but ate too often at the neighbours

    Cause she couldnt keep up with me so i had to find other outlets

    Stuck his plug into any available outlet

    She was 220 and I was 110 it was never meant to be

    His plug fell off :o

    She was to much voltage and would not accept my plug

    Brought home crabs, not the eating variety

    WOW just WOW you want to back that bus up honey. Finish me off

    Lol :laugh: .. ok ..to be fair they were really cute crotch crickets
  • Watching_The_Wheels
    Watching_The_Wheels Posts: 4,616 Member
    edited December 2017
    Couldn't agree on a wedding date - she wanted a spring wedding and I wanted to wait until after I get divorced to my current wife.
  • ilfaith
    ilfaith Posts: 16,769 Member
    He only ever wanted to watch...not be an active participant
  • Watching_The_Wheels
    Watching_The_Wheels Posts: 4,616 Member
    My BMI exceeded her requirements needed to sustain a healthy, productive relationship