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We broke up because...

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Replies

  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    She's just jealous that I won world record for standing on one leg for 83 hours. 🤷🏼‍♀️
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    She made me stand behind her for 83 hours in case she fell. No food, no potty breaks, nothing!
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Couldn't hold 83 hours for potty break.. weak kidneys
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Was always sharing my Medical history with Strangers 🙁
  • Ironwoman1111
    Ironwoman1111 Posts: 3,913 Member
    She always acted like she was part of the cast in a telenovela. She would randomly yell out “No, no, no!” and “Ay Dios Mío!”

    vv0spd122pj8.gif
  • cmsienk
    cmsienk Posts: 18,895 Member
    She confused our life together with the Sitcom 'Friends'. Kept calling me Monica and asking when Joey and Chandler were coming over.
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    She thought we were sisters from Full House. I was Michelle and she was Stephanie. I got tired of her calling police to report DJ missing.
  • Onerom1
    Onerom1 Posts: 355 Member
    Because she said her pet goldfish came first in everything she did. I had to take the backseat in second place to a goldfish from Walmart
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    He was a Snob and put me down for shopping at Wally World! He says that the only department store he'll step foot in is 'Tärɡət.
    I didn't have the heart to tell him it was pronounced Tar-get!
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    She wore her pajamas into Target. I was mortified! Apparently she didn’t realize we dress up for Tärɡət.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    Rolled her eyes at me one too many times 😑
  • SweetDisturbanceTx
    SweetDisturbanceTx Posts: 164 Member
    Called me by the wrong name…repeatedly
  • happimess01
    happimess01 Posts: 9,074 Member
    Wanted me to go blonde as well
  • Ironwoman1111
    Ironwoman1111 Posts: 3,913 Member
    When we went to the home makeover show I thought he meant it was for our house, but that’s where he met his second wife. Yeah, he got me a sister-wife!😤
  • Sharsou
    Sharsou Posts: 8,849 Member
    I loved her unconditionally and she loved me coz of my big house 😉
  • Ironwoman1111
    Ironwoman1111 Posts: 3,913 Member
    He surprised me with his big house! He’d found some empty fridge boxes behind Costco, duct taped them together and voila! Home sweet home!😦 📦
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Dump me for a torso.. 😱
  • sandejones
    sandejones Posts: 1,840 Member
    He kept saying his mothers cooking was better.
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    edited September 2021
    Spent most days in fairy fantasy world.. she keeps flapping her arm and say.. "look I can fly". 😆

    (Ps.. my dad was the better cook.. 😆)
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    He, he ... oh its so awful I can't say 🥺😫
    Im traumatised
  • Cat0703a
    Cat0703a Posts: 17,577 Member
    She was catatonic. Her ex really did a number on her.
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    She said carbs were bad and would never let me eat the potato. I mean... potatoes. 😏
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    She eats ppls toes
  • PaperDoll_
    PaperDoll_ Posts: 32,857 Member
    His toes were inedible.
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    edited September 2021
    I got fat eating the frosting she made me eat :(
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Talk about slow
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    lx1x wrote: »
    Talk about slow

    Fixed it 😛

    I found 6 of our neighbours hiding in our bedroom *sob*
  • lx1x
    lx1x Posts: 38,330 Member
    Umm...that's the guys you trying to hide..
  • slimgirljo15
    slimgirljo15 Posts: 269,456 Member
    edited September 2021
    lx1x wrote: »
    Umm...that's the guys you trying to hide..

    Nice try.. they were ladies.. covered in frosting 😆
  • Ironwoman1111
    Ironwoman1111 Posts: 3,913 Member
    She never played the frosting game with me☹️

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