We broke up because...
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we didn't like each others movie preferences0
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she always wanted to see bambi for some reason0
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He shot Bambi's Mom!0
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Started crying when I brought home a venison roast -- I couldn't handle the drama0
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Said I over cooked his venison0
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She makes dinner either raw or charred to a crisp -- the key to a man's heart is through his stomach0
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he ate me out of house and home0
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She was homeless and was using me for a roof over her head!0
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she had me pay rent by kneeling on grits0
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she made me pay rent by kneeling on grits0
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She was literally big enough to shelter me from rain. King kong doesn't have @$!# on her0
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He was always trying to get me to diet and shave!0
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She had this weird shaving fetish0
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He didnt like my smooth legs and was more into Amazon Women!0
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Stalked me at the gym. Girl, I need some me time.0
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Paranoid for no reason. Had a big head0
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Kept showing me selfies of him shirtless0
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He had a stash of topless pics of some guy under his mattress
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Wouldn't let me post topless pictures of her on the net0
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He took pictures of me naked while I was sleeping. (Found the stash of pics!)0
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She didn't ever want her picture taken. Turns out she was wanted in 3 states.0
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She was wanted in several states, by the other men she was also married to.0
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she was involved with shady people0
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He got me drunk on weekends to get me to do the kinky stuff0
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He had a drinking problem! So much so that he was starting to look like the booze he was drinking!0
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She had to get drunk to do kinky stuff.0
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Her idea of Kinky was including Fido!
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she always said bang and denied saying she meant band.0
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He was so drunk he forgot who he was talking to!0
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she forgot me.0
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