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We broke up because...

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Replies

  • deviboy1592
    deviboy1592 Posts: 989 Member
    She forced me to watch Dr.oz
  • soldiergrl_101
    soldiergrl_101 Posts: 2,205 Member
    im sorry but hahaha that was good :)

    but you were too busy on your phone taking selfies
  • bestintheworld842
    bestintheworld842 Posts: 190 Member
    the sex was insane
  • taco_inspector
    taco_inspector Posts: 7,223 Member
    bestintheworld842 wrote: »
    the sex was insane
    OK, HE stole my Viagra...
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    standenvernet wrote: »
    me encanta sus juevos rancheros, rasclados, or qualqier (tambien, sus ojos), but alas I needed a little me time; it was neither the first, nor most recent mistake I've made.

    Todo lo que siempre quiere es " yo" tiempo! que pasa contigo?

    He needed Viagra :open_mouth::tongue:

  • PewterSky
    PewterSky Posts: 9,224 Member
    She could get upset when I would try to cook for her every single time
  • taco_inspector
    taco_inspector Posts: 7,223 Member
    While I found the malleability of pewter coupled with the vastness of the sky initially attractive, I began to long for a woman that was more resolute, committed to her passions, and a bit more 'down to earth'
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    He was more attracted to Morlocks!
  • pechepanda
    pechepanda Posts: 7,939 Member
    she was obsessed with morlocks and i refused to learn what they are
  • deviboy1592
    deviboy1592 Posts: 989 Member
    She thought Morlocks was a lock and key company, clearly I couldn't take her to comic con, see ya
  • PewterSky
    PewterSky Posts: 9,224 Member
    She refused to learn a great many things, like how to boil an egg, or launder her clothes
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    She wanted me to be her maid!
  • deviboy1592
    deviboy1592 Posts: 989 Member
    She was my maid.
  • abbylisious
    abbylisious Posts: 391 Member
    He was looking for a maid
  • PewterSky
    PewterSky Posts: 9,224 Member
    He had a maid fetish
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    he was ashamed of my profession and wouldn't introduce me to his parents! :'(
  • deviboy1592
    deviboy1592 Posts: 989 Member
    It wasn't her profession, it was her constant belching I was worried about.
  • spomaney
    spomaney Posts: 28 Member
    My belching scared his cat.
  • pechepanda
    pechepanda Posts: 7,939 Member
    he scared my poor little kitty
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Her kitty was scared of everything!!! :tongue:
  • spomaney
    spomaney Posts: 28 Member
    We broke up because she thought I was a man... [insert sad face here]
  • pechepanda
    pechepanda Posts: 7,939 Member
    expected me to make assumptions and then got mad when they were wrong.... goodness, im not a mind reader you know?
  • deviboy1592
    deviboy1592 Posts: 989 Member
    She was wrong about everything. Even when she was wrong about being wrong
  • taco_inspector
    taco_inspector Posts: 7,223 Member
    ... she wouldn't stay outta my brain! Tinfoil was ineffective against her invasive thought-probing; I had to get some distance.
  • spomaney
    spomaney Posts: 28 Member
    The tinfoil he wore on his head interfered with my satellite radio service.
  • SwedishSarah
    SwedishSarah Posts: 4,350 Member
    He was constantly using his phone, watching tv, pretty much doing everything he could to ignore me!
  • FabulousFantasticFifty
    FabulousFantasticFifty Posts: 195,832 Member
    Too technical for me! I couldn't get attention unless I sent a text or any of that other techy stuff!
  • PewterSky
    PewterSky Posts: 9,224 Member
    I grew tired of her admirers who'd just follow us crazily everywhere we went
  • pechepanda
    pechepanda Posts: 7,939 Member
    she didnt like my fan club...called them stalkers
  • Carpedieznutz
    Carpedieznutz Posts: 1,166 Member
    She was a complete stranger to me and I am not sure how we started dating in the first place

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