Male body pressure becoming the same as women?
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sklarbodds wrote: »sklarbodds wrote: »sklarbodds wrote: »sklarbodds wrote: »Should have specified that I meant the miscers (not all guys) are much harsher on each other than women are on them But they are convinced that it is just women pushing the standards on them. I do realize it's a very specific demographic on that board and I have no idea what most men's thoughts are on the matter*. I just automatically thought of the misc because so much aligns with some of the things mentioned in the article.
I would think the opposite, and I was married for 15 years and single for the last 2.5
For instance, I'm 5'9" roughly and if any woman is 5'7" or taller I'm almost automatically not an option. I wish I was exaggerating, but I'm really not. I can't grow any taller. In a world where dating starts with a profile pic, the chiseled jaw line that some guys have is a clear advantage. I happen to have a beard (it's often the first thing women want to talk about when messaging), but I have friends who can't really grow one (looks sloppy and patchy when they do).
My guy friends do say some things, but it doesn't ever feel judgy as much as jovial (maybe it's my perception?).
That's funny. I'm 5'9" and it frustrates me that all the tall guys seem to go for tiny women. I'm happy if a guy is at least equal to my height. I do, however, seem to get hit on a lot by dudes under 5'7". It feels like a fetish thing.
Do you give the 5'7" guy a shot?
Sometimes, but not usually.
Well I appreciate the honest answer
Sure, why lie? To make a bunch of strangers on a dieting site think better of me? LOL
But what about your internet cred?
LMAO No, really, that's funny... :disagree:0 -
From the other end of the spectrum, how comfortable are guys with dating a girl who is taller than them? I must admit, I've always sort of liked the idea, never been able to pull it off though. It's a damn shame there is no WNBA team in my town.0
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The height thing is interesting to me because it has virtually no effect on me, meaning that it's not a factor I consider when determining attractiveness. It takes no effort to be tall so I'm not sure why it is impressive. I don't know.
My dad is 6'3" and I'll admit that my husband is 6'2" and his dad is 6'4". Maybe being around tall people so long has made me blind to its charms. I'm more apt to get annoyed by it because my husband does stuff like put the lid to the butter dish on top of the fridge to get it out of the way and then I wander around looking for it (because, seriously, who would think to look up there?)0 -
FoCoAlphaNerd wrote: »
To some extent, but I doubt many of they actually wanted to be 6'4". Most people don't want to be "different," especially in high school. I always thought 5'9" was the perfect height.
If only I had been 120 lbs as well... 0 -
FoCoAlphaNerd wrote: »From the other end of the spectrum, how comfortable are guys with dating a girl who is taller than them? I must admit, I've always sort of liked the idea, never been able to pull it off though. It's a damn shame there is no WNBA team in my town.
I don't really care about their height. I have dated taller (5'11") and I was very attracted to her and generally, I have no problem with tall.0 -
The height thing is interesting to me because it has virtually no effect on me, meaning that it's not a factor I consider when determining attractiveness. It takes no effort to be tall so I'm not sure why it is impressive. I don't know.
My dad is 6'3" and I'll admit that my husband is 6'2" and his dad is 6'4". Maybe being around tall people so long has made me blind to its charms. I'm more apt to get annoyed by it because my husband does stuff like put the lid to the butter dish on top of the fridge to get it out of the way and then I wander around looking for it (because, seriously, who would think to look up there?)
Well, they should correct me if I'm wrong, but I think for most girls it's not so much "oooh, he's two inches taller than his friend, he's the hotter one," it's just about the guy being taller than they are. For most women I know that is a big dividing line, but you don't score a bunch of extra points for being eight inches taller than them instead of four.0 -
FoCoAlphaNerd wrote: »The height thing is interesting to me because it has virtually no effect on me, meaning that it's not a factor I consider when determining attractiveness. It takes no effort to be tall so I'm not sure why it is impressive. I don't know.
My dad is 6'3" and I'll admit that my husband is 6'2" and his dad is 6'4". Maybe being around tall people so long has made me blind to its charms. I'm more apt to get annoyed by it because my husband does stuff like put the lid to the butter dish on top of the fridge to get it out of the way and then I wander around looking for it (because, seriously, who would think to look up there?)
Well, they should correct me if I'm wrong, but I think for most girls it's not so much "oooh, he's two inches taller than his friend, he's the hotter one," it's just about the guy being taller than they are. For most women I know that is a big dividing line, but you don't score a bunch of extra points for being eight inches taller than them instead of four.
Yeah, most girls I've talked to say a woman wants to have a man that they feel small...like they feel like the man if they're taller or something along those lines.0 -
To some extent, but I doubt many of they actually wanted to be 6'4". Most people don't want to be "different," especially in high school. I always thought 5'9" was the perfect height. If only I had been 120 lbs as well...
Yeah, I wouldn't want to be any taller than I am now. I already don't fit right in the back seats of most cars, have to buy extra tall shirts even when I'm super thin, and most office type furniture barely gets to a height that is tolerable for me.
Once you start hitting maybe 6'1" or so, there are a ton of societal amenities that stop working right. I hate having to duck down to see the light if I am the first person in line at a signal, so damn annoying.0 -
My boyfriend is 5'4" or 5'5". He's constantly crapped on about his height. He works at a jail and not only are the inmates calling him midget or saying he has little man syndrome when he tells them to do something, but even his co-workers give him crap about it. A supervisor told him he wouldn't be trained for the segregation module because of his size. He can take care of himself, he's not fragile in any way at all, so I don't see why his height is an issue for that. He's had girls in the past (before me, because he'd be enjoying a few new @$$holes if he did this now. lol) but he's talked to them on Facebook and flirted, then they see him for the first time in person and see how short he is an are completely unintrested in him after that. One girl even told him he'd be hotter if he was taller. He can't help his height. I'm 5'6" and don't care that he is shorter than me. So yeah I think guys have body pressure like women. Except women are suppose to be thin, beautiful without flaws (except the flaws make them unique and beautiful, but don't have any because they'll air brush them out) and men are suppose to be tall, muscular, and hot.
People just need to stop judging based on looks and judge people based on if they're an @$$hole or not. 0 -
sklarbodds wrote: »FoCoAlphaNerd wrote: »From the other end of the spectrum, how comfortable are guys with dating a girl who is taller than them? I must admit, I've always sort of liked the idea, never been able to pull it off though. It's a damn shame there is no WNBA team in my town.
I don't really care about their height. I have dated taller (5'11") and I was very attracted to her and generally, I have no problem with tall.
My dad's 5'6" at best. My mom is nearly 5'8". I am 5'9" and my two sisters are both 5'7" +. They've been married 36 yrs now and are still doing their level best to gross us out (anyone up for a little *kitten* grab?![:\](https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/resources/emoji/confused.png ":\")
)
Genetics are weird. At a hair under 6', my husband is marginally taller than his dad. Our 14.5 yo daughter is 5'9 and 5/8" (we did the annual measure in early Jan), so taller than I am, and our 12yo son is pushing 5'7". The doctor says (warns, really) that he is likely to be -at least- 6'2". Our 11yo daughter is looking to stop short of my height, but still tallish and my 9yo daughter is probably going to be 5'6" at most.
All that being said, I've always loved being a tall female and have dated guys from 2 inches shorter than me up to 5" taller. Height was not a big issue (pun intended) and I hope that we are teaching our children to "judge" a person by far more than physical characteristics over which they have little to no control.
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Yeah, I'm not buying it. If it were the case then the amount of plastic surgery for men should be equal of that with women, clothing apparel in the same equality, and more men doing crazy diets to "tone".
The majority of my male clients either want to: get bigger or get smaller. 6 pack abs aren't even a request.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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Yeah, I'm not buying it. If it were the case then the amount of plastic surgery for men should be equal of that with women, clothing apparel in the same equality, and more men doing crazy diets to "tone".
The majority of my male clients either want to: get bigger or get smaller. 6 pack abs aren't even a request.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
Not necessarily. You're talking about how people respond to those pressures. Men could have just as many pressures and just as intense of a response, but have it express in a totally different way. The psychological reactions to "trauma" (if that is what this could be called, maybe "stressors" is a better term) in men and women is wildly different. There would be no specific reason to expect surgery, diets or clothing to be the way which men dealt with that pressure.0 -
So the whole debate on male media pressure is reduced to height - a feature men can't change.
That's it! I'm off to go watch Shopping Queen - at least there women spend hours looking for something expensive that other 'expert' women can snidely call horrific, cheap and an accident between a cheap date and a clown car.
Shopping King just won't be the same.0 -
So you're coming up with an excuse for someone to wallow in mediocrity?crystalflame wrote: »What if you're 5'7", have a jawline that is NOT classically attractive, and have naturally thin hair? Maybe you could bust your *kitten* to get abs, but those other things aren't exactly changeable.
Ok. Like I asked earlier, and the person I asked didn't comprehend what I asked... so I shall ask again.
Why not try to be the best you can be? Why accept mediocrity in yourself or others?
It also appears as if you do not understand what the media calls mediocre.0 -
I'm totally serious, I was wondering if anyone was going to get what I was talking about. lol.5. As usual I agree with dbmata - mediocrity is not acceptable - and it doesn't mean spending hours in the gym - it's being the best you that you can be. The best husband, the best father, the best employee, the best leader so when you look in the mirror - you like the person that is looking back.
No regrets.
Good man.
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Username is strangely appropriate. lol.It is literally impossible to be the best you that you can be.
It is no where near impossible to be the best you can be. Unless you're a slacker, layabout, etc. If you lack a will to attempt to achieve anything, then yeah... you are totally correct. I don't accept that in people though, without a doctor's note.
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Yeah, guess being rich just isn't good enough anymore. *rolls eyes*0
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The pressure on dudes is ramping up. It's far from equal, but it's increasing. I would rather prefer to let up pressure on everyone than to turn it up on the dudes. Husband judges himself hard in the mirror. I keep telling him, look man, you're already the hottest to me. We are doing this nutritious diet and gym thing for your health and mine, not to pressure you to look like an Olympic athlete. He feels judged because finding clothes in his size is very difficult. Recently, plus size women have been getting a lot of more nice clothes on the market, but for men the offerings are still very deficient. I feel that when he gets down to a 1x he will be much happier with his looks, but I hate that he feels bad about himself right now.
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EvgeniZyntx wrote: »So the whole debate on male media pressure is reduced to height - a feature men can't change.
That's it! I'm off to go watch Shopping Queen - at least there women spend hours looking for something expensive that other 'expert' women can snidely call horrific, cheap and an accident between a cheap date and a clown car.
Shopping King just won't be the same.
I prefer watching RuPaul's Drag Race.0 -
Also, short girl + sewing machine = hem your own stuff. Magic
Yeah, I'm short. *shrugs* that's cool. I can alter my stuff sufficiently. 0
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