Male body pressure becoming the same as women?
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Are there really lots of (straight) women out there getting in shape and trying to look good primarily for other women?? I have never experienced that.
I don't do it for guys either though. In fact, my guy likes me on the meatier than I prefer myself be. Honestly, it's really always been about me and what I think is beautiful and how I feel good about myself.
Now that said, I haven't always had the healthiest or the most realistic of ideas of what "attractive" is for myself and I do notice what I find attractive correlates with what's been shoved in my face as "ideal" since I was a little girl. It's still got little do with the opposite sex or even the same sex though. *shrug*0 -
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Joking aside, I have come to find a lot of folks are on medically needed test, which is interesting. It makes me wonder if a lot of the weaknesses we see within ourselves can have a hormone based explanation, and could be resolved with therapy.
For example, whinging about societal pressure, instead of just trying to be the best one can be.
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Joking aside, I have come to find a lot of folks are on medically needed test, which is interesting. It makes me wonder if a lot of the weaknesses we see within ourselves can have a hormone based explanation, and could be resolved with therapy.
For example, whinging about societal pressure, instead of just trying to be the best one can be.
....Or another example: Being condescending to people who don't think exactly like you and instead, just except the possibility there are other realities outside of your own.
Maybe I missed something in this thread a while back, but why assume that all people who are effected by societal pressure aren't trying to be the best the can be already?0 -
sklarbodds wrote: »Interesting article claiming that today's body standards for men are equally as impossible and damaging as women's.
Emotional pressure on men has traditionally came in other forms (ie, "success"). Adding the modern twist of body shaming is just another dagger into our gender's collective soul.
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TRUTH. It's impossible to be the best at everything. And there is almost always someone who will be better.0 -
Don't you know- women are experts about social pressures....
and women know everything- haven't you learned this yet??
jack of all trades- master of none.We are all most mediocre in most of our attributes.
The more you try to do - the more average you get at all those things.
So your options are: do nothing- be less than average at everything
So either chose to be okay at all the things- be really good at nothing.
Be really good at something- and average at almost everything else.0 -
For example, whinging about societal pressure, instead of just trying to be the best one can be.
Okay, I have had a significant amount of personal and professional successes in my life. I'm a leader in my community and... Well, I have a lot of experience under my belt. I have big goals still left to achieve, only one of which is even peripherally about my body shape.
You know what I'm going to get the most praise and approbation for?
It will be about reducing the size of my butt. If I achieve one of my big goals, my WEIGHT LOSS is going to be the damn lead for it in the local paper.
THAT will define "the best I can be" in most people's eyes. You bloody well BET I resent the living soul that.
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NoelFigart1 wrote: »
For example, whinging about societal pressure, instead of just trying to be the best one can be.
Okay, I have had a significant amount of personal and professional successes in my life. I'm a leader in my community and... Well, I have a lot of experience under my belt. I have big goals still left to achieve, only one of which is even peripherally about my body shape.
You know what I'm going to get the most praise and approbation for?
It will be about reducing the size of my butt. If I achieve one of my big goals, my WEIGHT LOSS is going to be the damn lead for it in the local paper.
THAT will define "the best I can be" in most people's eyes. You bloody well BET I resent the living soul that.
Yep, it's disgusting, ain't it? Most men don't care that I have my own place, a good career, and make more $$ than they do. It's all about how I look in those heels. LOL0 -
Love the bolded part.
Because what you are is often what you choose to be. In other words, when people say, "I just don't have time to work out" what they're really saying is "I spend my time doing things that I think are more important that I give my energy to". It's not a bad thing, per se, it's just prioritizing something different. That can be kids, work, Netflix, sports, hobbies, porn, sleep, whatever....but when it comes down to it, it's always about choosing something else over fitness and health.
And here's the totality of it, that's their choice. I personally made some choices to be more fit. I simply prioritized working out over a couple hours sleep in the morning and sacrificed some of the time I would spend watching TV at night. I prioritized healthy food over convenience and in some cases pleasure (french fries, pizza and wings....argh!!!!). But I decided that being healthy was more important than all of those things.
So, in a sense, I became mediocre at being gluttonous and excelled at health and fitness
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NoelFigart1 wrote: »
For example, whinging about societal pressure, instead of just trying to be the best one can be.
Okay, I have had a significant amount of personal and professional successes in my life. I'm a leader in my community and... Well, I have a lot of experience under my belt. I have big goals still left to achieve, only one of which is even peripherally about my body shape.
You know what I'm going to get the most praise and approbation for?
It will be about reducing the size of my butt. If I achieve one of my big goals, my WEIGHT LOSS is going to be the damn lead for it in the local paper.
THAT will define "the best I can be" in most people's eyes. You bloody well BET I resent the living soul that.
Yep, it's disgusting, ain't it? Most men don't care that I have my own place, a good career, and make more $$ than they do. It's all about how I look in those heels. LOL
I thought we talked about this, you're too tall for heels
As a guy who's dating, I would consider smart, successful, stable as HUGE positives. But it's not exclusively that. You would have to still look good and take care of yourself. Just like if you looked crazy hot but held a conversation like a fence post and lived on welfare and had no ambition....no thanks.0 -
sklarbodds wrote: »NoelFigart1 wrote: »
For example, whinging about societal pressure, instead of just trying to be the best one can be.
Okay, I have had a significant amount of personal and professional successes in my life. I'm a leader in my community and... Well, I have a lot of experience under my belt. I have big goals still left to achieve, only one of which is even peripherally about my body shape.
You know what I'm going to get the most praise and approbation for?
It will be about reducing the size of my butt. If I achieve one of my big goals, my WEIGHT LOSS is going to be the damn lead for it in the local paper.
THAT will define "the best I can be" in most people's eyes. You bloody well BET I resent the living soul that.
Yep, it's disgusting, ain't it? Most men don't care that I have my own place, a good career, and make more $$ than they do. It's all about how I look in those heels. LOL
I thought we talked about this, you're too tall for heels
As a guy who's dating, I would consider smart, successful, stable as HUGE positives. But it's not exclusively that. You would have to still look good and take care of yourself. Just like if you looked crazy hot but held a conversation like a fence post and lived on welfare and had no ambition....no thanks.
SHUSH you. I will wear what I want.
So you're saying I must look like a slob....got it.
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Men are not objectified because women don' t care what men look like...mostly. If you are way extreme like weigh 80 pounds or 300 pounds you will have a problem getting a woman but if you are moderately slobby you can get any woman on the planet.0
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Joking aside, I have come to find a lot of folks are on medically needed test, which is interesting. It makes me wonder if a lot of the weaknesses we see within ourselves can have a hormone based explanation, and could be resolved with therapy.
For example, whinging about societal pressure, instead of just trying to be the best one can be.
....Or another example: Being condescending to people who don't think exactly like you and instead, just except the possibility there are other realities outside of your own.
Maybe I missed something in this thread a while back, but why assume that all people who are effected by societal pressure aren't trying to be the best the can be already?
None of what you asked was relevant, but if you read back, you'll see discussion where someone said it was too hard to be anything but mediocre. It was a little sad.
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I wouldn't accept that one bit.NoelFigart1 wrote: »
For example, whinging about societal pressure, instead of just trying to be the best one can be.
Okay, I have had a significant amount of personal and professional successes in my life. I'm a leader in my community and... Well, I have a lot of experience under my belt. I have big goals still left to achieve, only one of which is even peripherally about my body shape.
You know what I'm going to get the most praise and approbation for?
It will be about reducing the size of my butt. If I achieve one of my big goals, my WEIGHT LOSS is going to be the damn lead for it in the local paper.
THAT will define "the best I can be" in most people's eyes. You bloody well BET I resent the living soul that.
If you're a leader, you lead others to informed understandings of what you do and what you achieve. Someone can puke a lot and lose weight. Or go on Isagenix, etc etc. It takes work, dedication, ambition, and sacrifice to achieve excellence. The lead in they'd attempt would be weight, because not everyone else understands those other qualities. As a leader though, it will be your job to correct them.
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