Online Dating

2456732

Replies

  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    Girl...let's see where should I start...dated a guy for 3-4 months who swore he was divorced and he was in fact married and still living with his wife...umm couple of psychopaths and another lying married guy...a control freak...couple others who wanted me to save them from their marriages and support them financially...I've now given up on online dating.

    That is so dissappointing. I've pumped up online dating for my sister for soooooo long. She is already very critical of men. If she cant find a decent guy online is there any hope?

  • funjen1972
    funjen1972 Posts: 949 Member

    seepersaud wrote: »
    funjen1972 wrote: »
    Now, if I had slept with him I would have totally understood hehehe

    Want to go on a date? LOL

    Lol depends...what's for lunch?
  • seepersaud
    seepersaud Posts: 5,759 Member
    Your choice, babe
  • dbanks80 wrote: »
    Girl...let's see where should I start...dated a guy for 3-4 months who swore he was divorced and he was in fact married and still living with his wife...umm couple of psychopaths and another lying married guy...a control freak...couple others who wanted me to save them from their marriages and support them financially...I've now given up on online dating.

    That is so dissappointing. I've pumped up online dating for my sister for soooooo long. She is already very critical of men. If she cant find a decent guy online is there any hope?

    She just needs to stay VERY aware and pay attention to red flags...doesn't suck for everyone just me lol

  • Lasmartchika
    Lasmartchika Posts: 3,440 Member
    dbanks80 wrote: »
    Girl...let's see where should I start...dated a guy for 3-4 months who swore he was divorced and he was in fact married and still living with his wife...umm couple of psychopaths and another lying married guy...a control freak...couple others who wanted me to save them from their marriages and support them financially...I've now given up on online dating.

    That is so dissappointing. I've pumped up online dating for my sister for soooooo long. She is already very critical of men. If she cant find a decent guy online is there any hope?

    Oh there's hope... after reading these posts makes me real happy and feel VERY LUCKY that the one person I connected with was the one. But yeah, from the first time we chatted to the first time we met face to face, took 2 years, and another 2 years to finally move in together... so you know, gotta have patience. :flowerforyou:

    To this day we're still together. :heart:
  • Timorous_Beastie
    Timorous_Beastie Posts: 595 Member
    I didn't have any terrible dates from online dating - the worst was a guy with horrible breath, but in the grand scheme of things, that's not so bad. The real weirdos were "kind" enough to let me know they were weirdos before we even swapped email addresses. It was pretty easy to screen out the freaks.

    All told, I had four face to face dates with guys I met online, and married the last one. We've been together 15 years, married 13.
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    dbanks80 wrote: »
    Girl...let's see where should I start...dated a guy for 3-4 months who swore he was divorced and he was in fact married and still living with his wife...umm couple of psychopaths and another lying married guy...a control freak...couple others who wanted me to save them from their marriages and support them financially...I've now given up on online dating.

    That is so dissappointing. I've pumped up online dating for my sister for soooooo long. She is already very critical of men. If she cant find a decent guy online is there any hope?

    She just needs to stay VERY aware and pay attention to red flags...doesn't suck for everyone just me lol

    LOL! I think it takes patience there is someone out there.
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    edited February 2015
    dbanks80 wrote: »
    Girl...let's see where should I start...dated a guy for 3-4 months who swore he was divorced and he was in fact married and still living with his wife...umm couple of psychopaths and another lying married guy...a control freak...couple others who wanted me to save them from their marriages and support them financially...I've now given up on online dating.

    That is so dissappointing. I've pumped up online dating for my sister for soooooo long. She is already very critical of men. If she cant find a decent guy online is there any hope?

    Oh there's hope... after reading these posts makes me real happy and feel VERY LUCKY that the one person I connected with was the one. But yeah, from the first time we chatted to the first time we met face to face, took 2 years, and another 2 years to finally move in together... so you know, gotta have patience. :flowerforyou:

    To this day we're still together. :heart:

    That is good to know. I think that you can meet douche bags anywhere. It's just you have access to more of them online but weeding out the bad ones I am sure eventually there is a good guy. That is what I tell her.

    And Congrautlations on finding a great guy!!!!
  • newmeadow wrote: »
    The real weirdos were "kind" enough to let me know they were weirdos before we even swapped email addresses. It was pretty easy to screen out the freaks.

    Screen appears to be the key word here.

    I'm wondering why more of that doesn't take place.

    It seems that potential lovers email back and forth a lot before taking the next step to telephone or face-to-face meeting.

    A minor thing like grammar, spelling and punctuation tells a lot.

    Talking about an ex would also be a red flag.

    Mentioning the pills they take to treat their various psychiatric maladies might be a concern.

    Talking about sex or asking about certain parts of a woman's anatomy before the date would put a fella in the no-thanks-after-all category.

    Talking about sex or asking about certain parts of a woman's anatomy during the date is deserving of a nice-meeting-you-buh-by while you gather your things and walk out the door moment as well.

    Men would act better if women simply wouldn't give them the time of day in response to bad behavior.

    100% correct!!
  • iwillsucceed0444
    iwillsucceed0444 Posts: 432 Member
    Well I'm a 19 year old female. I consider myself attractive, especially when I do my hair and makeup. My body is a work in progress but it's still decent imo. Anyways I made a POF account, and holy crap, WOW. I got SOOOOOO many messages from guys in their 40's-50's+, guys who were over 300 pounds, very unattractive guys, and just complete losers.
    No you don't have to be Brad Pitt, but seriously I'm not attracted to you in the least physically it's not gonna work. The one guy who actually looked dateable on there, well turned out he just wanted a hookup and wanted me to come over that day. Ugh, dude c'mon use tinder for that, you're only 20!! I deleted POF because there wasn't too many guys my age who were actually dateable on there. I still have tinder though but it's hard because most guys just want a hookup...:(
  • jorodri7
    jorodri7 Posts: 1,025 Member
    Well I'm a 19 year old female. I consider myself attractive, especially when I do my hair and makeup. My body is a work in progress but it's still decent imo. Anyways I made a POF account, and holy crap, WOW. I got SOOOOOO many messages from guys in their 40's-50's+, guys who were over 300 pounds, very unattractive guys, and just complete losers.
    No you don't have to be Brad Pitt, but seriously I'm not attracted to you in the least physically it's not gonna work. The one guy who actually looked dateable on there, well turned out he just wanted a hookup and wanted me to come over that day. Ugh, dude c'mon use tinder for that, you're only 20!! I deleted POF because there wasn't too many guys my age who were actually dateable on there. I still have tinder though but it's hard because most guys just want a hookup...:(
    Well I'm a 19 year old female. I consider myself attractive, especially when I do my hair and makeup. My body is a work in progress but it's still decent imo. Anyways I made a POF account, and holy crap, WOW. I got SOOOOOO many messages from guys in their 40's-50's+, guys who were over 300 pounds, very unattractive guys, and just complete losers.
    No you don't have to be Brad Pitt, but seriously I'm not attracted to you in the least physically it's not gonna work. The one guy who actually looked dateable on there, well turned out he just wanted a hookup and wanted me to come over that day. Ugh, dude c'mon use tinder for that, you're only 20!! I deleted POF because there wasn't too many guys my age who were actually dateable on there. I still have tinder though but it's hard because most guys just want a hookup...:(

    I bet I could change your luck!!!!
  • redhead_che
    redhead_che Posts: 292 Member
    [quote=
    I bet I could change your luck!!!![/quote]

    Are you always so creepytastic in your responses?
  • jorodri7
    jorodri7 Posts: 1,025 Member
    [quote=
    I bet I could change your luck!!!!

    Are you always so creepytastic in your responses?
    [/quote]

    Does a tin man piss oil?
  • jorodri7 wrote: »
    [quote=
    I bet I could change your luck!!!!

    Are you always so creepytastic in your responses?

    Does a tin man piss oil? [/quote]

    Did the fact that my daughter is 19 spook you? Lol

  • amunet07
    amunet07 Posts: 1,245 Member
    its a toss up...the date that went well until i offered to pay 1/2 the meal then he seemed distant and when we went to his house...he said he wasn't feeling the spark but I could stay if I want to f.... OR the guy who drank so much on our second date that he was puking. OR the guy who is not looking for a relationship just friends...then why the heck are you on Match.com???!! I have given up on online dating. lol
  • amunet07 wrote: »
    its a toss up...the date that went well until i offered to pay 1/2 the meal then he seemed distant and when we went to his house...he said he wasn't feeling the spark but I could stay if I want to f.... OR the guy who drank so much on our second date that he was puking. OR the guy who is not looking for a relationship just friends...then why the heck are you on Match.com???!! I have given up on online dating. lol

    I'm with you!
  • Just had another thought about this topic...the guys who judge you by your weight and or looks yet they have no room to judge or speak.
  • jorodri7
    jorodri7 Posts: 1,025 Member
    Just had another thought about this topic...the guys who judge you by your weight and or looks yet they have no room to judge or speak.

    Amen. There shouldn't be judging in the first place. Who are we to judge. I don't like when girls are quick to judge after they've been hurt many times before. Why are the good guys always put on the back burner?
  • newmeadow wrote: »
    Just had another thought about this topic...the guys who judge you by your weight and or looks yet they have no room to judge or speak.

    It feels lousy to be rated on the lower end of the scale of attractiveness, sure. But it also feels lousy to be out of shape and overweight. For most people, this stuff is within their own control. There's a lot one can do to get better looking.

    And I agree with you that a guy who himself is no specimen of gorgeousness should probably shut up about my fat thighs.

    But a good looking guy who is really fit and built is probably going to screen out women who don't fall into the same category and I can understand and accept that.

    I agree. The 2nd paragraph is what I'm referring to.
  • Belle8312
    Belle8312 Posts: 2,151 Member
    So I have been on almost every single dating website that has ever been created. The ones that are free, the ones that you pay for, the ones that are literally just for hook ups (POF and Tinder) and ones that seem could potentially be for long term (Match) and I seem to find the exact same thing: guys talk to you for about 2 minutes and then it's, can I have your number, can I have your e-mail address, etc. I'm sorry, but I am not giving you my number after exchanging 3 messages (literally 3, over the course of 10 minutes) with you.
    The best though are the guys who jump straight into sexual conversations (POF and Tinder are the best examples, which in my defense, I didn't really know too much about them at first, so I didn't know that's what they were all about), and want nothing more than a hook up.
    I had one guy who told me I had beautiful eyes and a great profile and that I was the type of girl he was looking for (this was on Match.com) and literally within 2 days of e-mailing back and forth, asked me if I liked a guy going down on me and when were we going to have sex.

    REALLY??? That conversation was quickly ended and deleted.
  • VeryKatie
    VeryKatie Posts: 5,961 Member
    Well I'm a 19 year old female. I consider myself attractive, especially when I do my hair and makeup. My body is a work in progress but it's still decent imo. Anyways I made a POF account, and holy crap, WOW. I got SOOOOOO many messages from guys in their 40's-50's+, guys who were over 300 pounds, very unattractive guys, and just complete losers.
    No you don't have to be Brad Pitt, but seriously I'm not attracted to you in the least physically it's not gonna work. The one guy who actually looked dateable on there, well turned out he just wanted a hookup and wanted me to come over that day. Ugh, dude c'mon use tinder for that, you're only 20!! I deleted POF because there wasn't too many guys my age who were actually dateable on there. I still have tinder though but it's hard because most guys just want a hookup...:(

    Um... POF and tinder are just different styles of the same thing. I'd suggest using a site you pay for. At least then, the cheap people are weeded out.
  • jorodri7
    jorodri7 Posts: 1,025 Member
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    So I have been on almost every single dating website that has ever been created. The ones that are free, the ones that you pay for, the ones that are literally just for hook ups (POF and Tinder) and ones that seem could potentially be for long term (Match) and I seem to find the exact same thing: guys talk to you for about 2 minutes and then it's, can I have your number, can I have your e-mail address, etc. I'm sorry, but I am not giving you my number after exchanging 3 messages (literally 3, over the course of 10 minutes) with you.
    The best though are the guys who jump straight into sexual conversations (POF and Tinder are the best examples, which in my defense, I didn't really know too much about them at first, so I didn't know that's what they were all about), and want nothing more than a hook up.
    I had one guy who told me I had beautiful eyes and a great profile and that I was the type of girl he was looking for (this was on Match.com) and literally within 2 days of e-mailing back and forth, asked me if I liked a guy going down on me and when were we going to have sex.

    REALLY??? That conversation was quickly ended and deleted.

    I've never had success on POF or okcupid. I didn't even try tinder because I am sure it's completely superficial. Which is cool if that's your thing just know it's not mine. I agree with Verykatie. You get what you put into it. And a paying profile seems to be our best choice. I always tend to never get a response. Which sucks because it tears at your inner confidence. I would accept it if I was creepy but last time I checked saying things like, "hey there how was the weekend"? On a Monday wasn't a creeper like tendency. That's ok though we will find success somewhere haha just have to find the right way about it.
  • Belle8312
    Belle8312 Posts: 2,151 Member
    edited February 2015
    VeryKatie wrote: »
    Well I'm a 19 year old female. I consider myself attractive, especially when I do my hair and makeup. My body is a work in progress but it's still decent imo. Anyways I made a POF account, and holy crap, WOW. I got SOOOOOO many messages from guys in their 40's-50's+, guys who were over 300 pounds, very unattractive guys, and just complete losers.
    No you don't have to be Brad Pitt, but seriously I'm not attracted to you in the least physically it's not gonna work. The one guy who actually looked dateable on there, well turned out he just wanted a hookup and wanted me to come over that day. Ugh, dude c'mon use tinder for that, you're only 20!! I deleted POF because there wasn't too many guys my age who were actually dateable on there. I still have tinder though but it's hard because most guys just want a hookup...:(

    Um... POF and tinder are just different styles of the same thing. I'd suggest using a site you pay for. At least then, the cheap people are weeded out.



    I completely agree with the above statement. I said in an earlier post that I didn't really understand what Tinder and POF were all about until I signed up for them and were on there for a while. I figured it out very quickly!

    Kind of a random question, but @iwillsucceed0444‌ - why are you on an online dating site at 19? I'm sure there are plenty of places you go that you could meet someone. What about school or work or something? You have plenty of time to find someone, you don't need to do the online dating thing. :smiley: (This is just my humble opinion, by the way)
  • lalanie17
    lalanie17 Posts: 63 Member
    The guys were attractive and where who they said to be...but geez worst date in my life never have got back.on since... :neutral_face:
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    edited February 2015
    So let me ask this question. My sister and I were talking about this last night and i wonder if anyone on here has experienced the same thing. She and her girlfirends are getting a lot of guys contacting them about swinging and orgies!! Is this common on the dating sites???!!! This is on Match.com
  • Belle8312
    Belle8312 Posts: 2,151 Member
    edited February 2015
    dbanks80 wrote: »
    So let me ask this question. My sister and I were talking about this last night and i wonder if anyone on here has experienced the same thing. She and her girlfirends are getting a lot of guys contacting them about swinging and orgies!! Is this common on the dating sites???!!! This is on Match.com

    WOW! I haven't heard or seen that one yet! But I would report it to Match.com as inappropriate messaging. They'll get kicked off in a second!
  • wolfsbayne
    wolfsbayne Posts: 3,116 Member
    I tend to attract guys in their 20's on dating sites. Those are the ones that are most amusing and like to talk sex right out of the gate.
  • FatAsianNerd
    FatAsianNerd Posts: 600 Member
    When I used to play World of Warcraft for hours upon hours, I always got along with one of my guild members who I'd go on raids with. The screen-name was somewhat "ambiguous" you could say -- something like RogueFlash1989.

    At a BBQ meetup with all of the other guild members, it turned out "Rogue-y" (as she was nicknamed) was this really cute, petite, sweet girl from San Diego. She hardly spoke on the mic, if at all, while we were playing the games, and everyone just assumed that Rogue-y was a dude. Most of the communication was done through typing/text messages on the board anyway.

    But yeah, after that meetup day, we ended up talking more and more and eventually dated for over a year.

    That's my online dating story. Lol.
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    dbanks80 wrote: »
    So let me ask this question. My sister and I were talking about this last night and i wonder if anyone on here has experienced the same thing. She and her girlfirends are getting a lot of guys contacting them about swinging and orgies!! Is this common on the dating sites???!!! This is on Match.com

    WOW! I haven't heard or seen that one yet! But I would report it to Match.com as inappropriate messaging. They'll get kicked off in a second!

    Yeah this one guy contacted my sister and invited her to some relationship forum at his house with other couples (mind you he is not in a relationship but he is giving relationship advice) She of course said "No" he offered to come pick her up at her house! He never got to know her, never asked any questions about her. So her girlfriends were saying that he was trying to recruit for swinging. They start off by asking relationship questions at this forum then they move to sexual talk and then they see how far you would go if you ever tried this or that and would you be interested in trying. Thank goodness she didnt fall for it. That is scary to me.

  • strozman
    strozman Posts: 2,622 Member
    edited February 2015
    I stopped using all of them a few months ago. My female friends set up a couple of profiles for me on different dating sites, and even chatted some girls up for me using my account.

    My first date was set up, we texted back and forth. Had an evening planned. Eventually the girl just told me to come over instead. I thought wow this is easy and a great confidence builder.

    Then a string of bad dates, like meeting a girl who weighed 100+lbs more than what she did in her profile pic, pics obviously taken years ago, looking nothing like their pics, lying about their age (up and down).

    My worst was a very beautiful, fit, successful business woman. Our dates started off incredible. She was deep, thoughtful and amazing. On the 5th date things went to hell. She had started to talk to her best male friend that was undermining me, and I found out that when she drank she would forget everything she said. When I asked her what the hell was going on with this stuff she left me at the restaurant (she insisted on driving) about 40 miles from home. When I started to try and get home, she pulled up and begged me to stay with her. She then proceeded to seduce and antagonize me to argue throughout the night. when I got home I deleted her pics and number. For the next 2 months she stalked, begged, and when she harassed me enough to talk, she would say she was breaking up with me. I was actually scared of that psycho