What nobody tells you about losing weight
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...that looking back every step taken to get in shape was so much easier than taking no steps and being out of shape.29
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That your tastes change, I like savoury things much more, and while I still enjoy chocolate and sugary stuff, I can't eat as much of it, as it makes me feel sluggish and uncomfortable if I do.17
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That your tastes change, I like savoury things much more, and while I still enjoy chocolate and sugary stuff, I can't eat as much of it, as it makes me feel sluggish and uncomfortable if I do.
Yes!! I crave so much savoury/salty food, and I never used to, maybe it's all the exercise. Chocolate was my go to, and I now find myself barely wanting it as it just makes me feel gross. Interestingly enough.. if I really want some salt, I'll just have an olive or two straight from the jar
better than a bag of chips I suppose. 4 -
Seeing your chins come off and looking down to see your feet that are not blocked by your large belly anymore
Taking a photo and posting it instead of hiding yourself
Returning clothes as they are too big35 -
The weird double-feeling when you look in the mirror of both being surprised at how small you look - and not being surprised at all, because this is the size you sort of expected to see all your life.45
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kalahmarii wrote: »That your tastes change, I like savoury things much more, and while I still enjoy chocolate and sugary stuff, I can't eat as much of it, as it makes me feel sluggish and uncomfortable if I do.
Yes!! I crave so much savoury/salty food, and I never used to, maybe it's all the exercise. Chocolate was my go to, and I now find myself barely wanting it as it just makes me feel gross. Interestingly enough.. if I really want some salt, I'll just have an olive or two straight from the jar better than a bag of chips I suppose.
Personally, I think chocolate recipes have changed in the past several years. They don’t really melt in your mouth anymore. It’s more like this waxy substance with chocolate flavor.
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CarvedTones wrote: »Mentioned a lot by others but I did not expect the attitude of some people who need to lose weight. Instead of being inspired, they are almost offended. It's like you are throwing their failure in their face just by being around them even if you say nothing about weight loss.
Same thing happened to me. One of my (now formerly) best friends lives about 800 miles away. We would talk on the phone at least 3-4 times a week with constant texts back and forth. I used to be the fat one and she the slim one. Fast forward, I went to visit her last summer after I dropped my initial massive weight (about 150lbs) and she had just had a baby (4 months prior). She gain a lot during pregnancy, but I don't care, a friend is a friend. Before that visit we would take a million pictures together and hang out doing whatever. Last visit, we took a grand total of 2, she "hated her smile" in every one and insisted on deleting them. Since then, she has called me on the phone 3 times in almost a year, I somehow always call when she's busy and doesn't pick up.
I didn't realize exactly what was going on until I saw a comment on FB. I posted a picture of myself finishes my first ever 5k, and she said it's "not polite to brag".
It sucks. But I don't know if it's jealousy or if she was just never a real friend to begin with and only hung around me to make her look better.
Sad that when someone loses or gains a lot of weight that thier "friends" seem to no longer be friends.
Sounds like you found out your "friend's" true colors. She must be pretty jealous to write a comment like that on FB. I'm sorry that you lost what you thought was a good friend...it hurts. She was never a true friend..and you are better off moving on to find friends who are your cheerleaders.
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The weird double-feeling when you look in the mirror of both being surprised at how small you look - and not being surprised at all, because this is the size you sort of expected to see all your life.
I can't wait for this. I've been a big girl for a long time but I still catch a glimpse of my reflection or see a picture someone has taken of me and don't expect to be as big as I am. I'm not sure how it still catches me off guard but it does. It will be so nice when I am nicely surprised by those moments instead of them making me sad.27 -
This one is not a real positive thing about me, but I find I have less sympathy for people who complain about their weight and claim they just can't lose weight. In very rare circumstances that might be true, but it is usually pretty clear that the problem is lack of commitment and/or discipline.22
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I love the fact I have lost 10lbs 207 down to 197 but no when at work (office job) my butt hurts when sitting for long periods of time. So I naturally stand up and work. Never happened when I was chubby.6
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CarvedTones wrote: »This one is not a real positive thing about me, but I find I have less sympathy for people who complain about their weight and claim they just can't lose weight. In very rare circumstances that might be true, but it is usually pretty clear that the problem is lack of commitment and/or discipline.
I get this as well, and I feel bad about it. After all, for *cough*ty years, that was me.
Worse, I find it way easier to be sympathetic to strangers than to my friends. Because my friends have seen me do it, right, so why are they still faffing about with fad diets and stuff?!
But it’s not that simple, and I KNOW that, so I bite my lip and try to say kind and encouraging things instead of what I’m actually thinking.
The really petty part is how I feel about those of my friends who have body image issues and are only slightly overweight. I mean, I was never terribly impressed by their complaining about how fat they were while I weighed twice what they did. Now several of them are clearly really struggling with discovering they weigh more than I do these days. And I’m feeling... smug.
I am a horrible person.
...but a horrible person in really cute clothes
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I get this as well, and I feel bad about it. After all, for *cough*ty years, that was me.
Worse, I find it way easier to be sympathetic to strangers than to my friends. Because my friends have seen me do it, right, so why are they still faffing about with fad diets and stuff?!
But it’s not that simple, and I KNOW that, so I bite my lip and try to say kind and encouraging things instead of what I’m actually thinking.
The really petty part is how I feel about those of my friends who have body image issues and are only slightly overweight. I mean, I was never terribly impressed by their complaining about how fat they were while I weighed twice what they did. Now several of them are clearly really struggling with discovering they weigh more than I do these days. And I’m feeling... smug.
I am a horrible person.
...but a horrible person in really cute clothes [/quote]
I love this, and I hear ya. It’s an interesting dynamic when you become smaller than some of your friends, I hear a lot of “don’t lose any more” (because then you’ll be slimmer than me) I’m still 10lb over BMI but lost 102lbs . A lot of the time it’s implied, 2 people actually said it like that.
But like you I feel smug and cute! And sometimes horrible22 -
CarvedTones wrote: »This one is not a real positive thing about me, but I find I have less sympathy for people who complain about their weight and claim they just can't lose weight. In very rare circumstances that might be true, but it is usually pretty clear that the problem is lack of commitment and/or discipline.
I don't really find this true for me. Lack of commitment is something I feel sympathy for. I've been there. I've been through times where I had no discipline or even times where I didn't care enough. I get it. You want to do something, but you haven't had it "click" in your head yet emotionally or mentally. Effectively, they really can't lose weight. It doesn't need to be a physical malady or some weird hormonal condition. Not having the mental resilience to see it through is just as crippling to weight loss as anything else, and just as frustrating.47 -
amusedmonkey wrote: »CarvedTones wrote: »This one is not a real positive thing about me, but I find I have less sympathy for people who complain about their weight and claim they just can't lose weight. In very rare circumstances that might be true, but it is usually pretty clear that the problem is lack of commitment and/or discipline.
I don't really find this true for me. Lack of commitment is something I feel sympathy for. I've been there. I've been through times where I had no discipline or even times where I didn't care enough. I get it. You want to do something, but you haven't had it "click" in your head yet emotionally or mentally. Effectively, they really can't lose weight. It doesn't need to be a physical malady or some weird hormonal condition. Not having the mental resilience to see it through is just as crippling to weight loss as anything else, and just as frustrating.
I agree with you logically. That's why I don't like it that my first emotional response is not compassion. Far from it.20 -
I get this as well, and I feel bad about it. After all, for *cough*ty years, that was me.
Worse, I find it way easier to be sympathetic to strangers than to my friends. Because my friends have seen me do it, right, so why are they still faffing about with fad diets and stuff?!
But it’s not that simple, and I KNOW that, so I bite my lip and try to say kind and encouraging things instead of what I’m actually thinking.
The really petty part is how I feel about those of my friends who have body image issues and are only slightly overweight. I mean, I was never terribly impressed by their complaining about how fat they were while I weighed twice what they did. Now several of them are clearly really struggling with discovering they weigh more than I do these days. And I’m feeling... smug.
I am a horrible person.
...but a horrible person in really cute clothes
I love this, and I hear ya. It’s an interesting dynamic when you become smaller than some of your friends, I hear a lot of “don’t lose any more” (because then you’ll be slimmer than me) I’m still 10lb over BMI but lost 102lbs . A lot of the time it’s implied, 2 people actually said it like that.
But like you I feel smug and cute! And sometimes horrible [/quote]
Now you can work on becoming kind and you'll have it all.
( and don't forget...almost everyone regains with gaining more...so park the smug..be grateful and keep at it.).
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CarvedTones wrote: »amusedmonkey wrote: »CarvedTones wrote: »This one is not a real positive thing about me, but I find I have less sympathy for people who complain about their weight and claim they just can't lose weight. In very rare circumstances that might be true, but it is usually pretty clear that the problem is lack of commitment and/or discipline.
I don't really find this true for me. Lack of commitment is something I feel sympathy for. I've been there. I've been through times where I had no discipline or even times where I didn't care enough. I get it. You want to do something, but you haven't had it "click" in your head yet emotionally or mentally. Effectively, they really can't lose weight. It doesn't need to be a physical malady or some weird hormonal condition. Not having the mental resilience to see it through is just as crippling to weight loss as anything else, and just as frustrating.
I agree with you logically. That's why I don't like it that my first emotional response is not compassion. Far from it.
Well, I can relate in that I don't always find it in myself to help. I know what needs to be done but also know that they're likely not there yet. I usually really like to help people, so I feel bad that more often than not I choose not to. I mean, what if they have crossed the threshold to "get it"? Nope, I'm out of there. If they're ready, they'll wiggle their way through it on their own. I don't have the emotional capacity to get involved in this, simply because I know how tricky cultivating a sustainable weight loss mentality can be.
Even if they're on the right track, listening to all the unavoidable stumbles would be too draining. I can offer distant generic advice, but I do my very best not to be part of anyone's weight loss attempt on a personal level. I feel for them, but I like my sanity.15 -
I get this as well, and I feel bad about it. After all, for *cough*ty years, that was me.
Worse, I find it way easier to be sympathetic to strangers than to my friends. Because my friends have seen me do it, right, so why are they still faffing about with fad diets and stuff?!
But it’s not that simple, and I KNOW that, so I bite my lip and try to say kind and encouraging things instead of what I’m actually thinking.
The really petty part is how I feel about those of my friends who have body image issues and are only slightly overweight. I mean, I was never terribly impressed by their complaining about how fat they were while I weighed twice what they did. Now several of them are clearly really struggling with discovering they weigh more than I do these days. And I’m feeling... smug.
I am a horrible person.
...but a horrible person in really cute clothes
I love this, and I hear ya. It’s an interesting dynamic when you become smaller than some of your friends, I hear a lot of “don’t lose any more” (because then you’ll be slimmer than me) I’m still 10lb over BMI but lost 102lbs . A lot of the time it’s implied, 2 people actually said it like that.
But like you I feel smug and cute! And sometimes horrible [/quote]
I had a "friend" tell me as we were discussing potential goal weights "oh you don't want to be skinny." I wanted to say "no YOU don't want me to be skinny. "
And no I certainly don't need to be skinny, just smaller and healthier. But you can sure bet her comments give me the motivation to keep plugging away.22 -
amusedmonkey wrote: »CarvedTones wrote: »amusedmonkey wrote: »CarvedTones wrote: »This one is not a real positive thing about me, but I find I have less sympathy for people who complain about their weight and claim they just can't lose weight. In very rare circumstances that might be true, but it is usually pretty clear that the problem is lack of commitment and/or discipline.
I don't really find this true for me. Lack of commitment is something I feel sympathy for. I've been there. I've been through times where I had no discipline or even times where I didn't care enough. I get it. You want to do something, but you haven't had it "click" in your head yet emotionally or mentally. Effectively, they really can't lose weight. It doesn't need to be a physical malady or some weird hormonal condition. Not having the mental resilience to see it through is just as crippling to weight loss as anything else, and just as frustrating.
I agree with you logically. That's why I don't like it that my first emotional response is not compassion. Far from it.
Well, I can relate in that I don't always find it in myself to help. I know what needs to be done but also know that they're likely not there yet. I usually really like to help people, so I feel bad that more often than not I choose not to. I mean, what if they have crossed the threshold to "get it"? Nope, I'm out of there. If they're ready, they'll wiggle their way through it on their own. I don't have the emotional capacity to get involved in this, simply because I know how tricky cultivating a sustainable weight loss mentality can be.
Even if they're on the right track, listening to all the unavoidable stumbles would be too draining. I can offer distant generic advice, but I do my very best not to be part of anyone's weight loss attempt on a personal level. I feel for them, but I like my sanity.
Great post. I have attempted to help, encourage, get a few people started and it's not continued on for long enough for me to bother any more. No more of that for me any more.
Thanks for opening my eyes.7 -
CarvedTones wrote: »This one is not a real positive thing about me, but I find I have less sympathy for people who complain about their weight and claim they just can't lose weight. In very rare circumstances that might be true, but it is usually pretty clear that the problem is lack of commitment and/or discipline.
I get this as well, and I feel bad about it. After all, for *cough*ty years, that was me.
Worse, I find it way easier to be sympathetic to strangers than to my friends. Because my friends have seen me do it, right, so why are they still faffing about with fad diets and stuff?!
But it’s not that simple, and I KNOW that, so I bite my lip and try to say kind and encouraging things instead of what I’m actually thinking.
The really petty part is how I feel about those of my friends who have body image issues and are only slightly overweight. I mean, I was never terribly impressed by their complaining about how fat they were while I weighed twice what they did. Now several of them are clearly really struggling with discovering they weigh more than I do these days. And I’m feeling... smug.
I am a horrible person.
...but a horrible person in really cute clothes
I could have written this.
I would have added 'insufferably', before 'smug' haha.
My SO is currently in the phase of losing clothing to me hehe yay free gym wear. She has also made the comment of needing to eat breakfast to boost her metabolism and I nearly bit through my lip. But I am getting better at nodding, smiling, offering more veggies with meals I prep and just generally ignoring the constant, 'oh I can't lose weight' *said through a mouthful of cake after having eaten 2 huge bags of crisps*
I was there less than 2 years ago, I have to keep reminding myself of that.19 -
GOT_Obsessed wrote: »amusedmonkey wrote: »CarvedTones wrote: »amusedmonkey wrote: »CarvedTones wrote: »This one is not a real positive thing about me, but I find I have less sympathy for people who complain about their weight and claim they just can't lose weight. In very rare circumstances that might be true, but it is usually pretty clear that the problem is lack of commitment and/or discipline.
I don't really find this true for me. Lack of commitment is something I feel sympathy for. I've been there. I've been through times where I had no discipline or even times where I didn't care enough. I get it. You want to do something, but you haven't had it "click" in your head yet emotionally or mentally. Effectively, they really can't lose weight. It doesn't need to be a physical malady or some weird hormonal condition. Not having the mental resilience to see it through is just as crippling to weight loss as anything else, and just as frustrating.
I agree with you logically. That's why I don't like it that my first emotional response is not compassion. Far from it.
Well, I can relate in that I don't always find it in myself to help. I know what needs to be done but also know that they're likely not there yet. I usually really like to help people, so I feel bad that more often than not I choose not to. I mean, what if they have crossed the threshold to "get it"? Nope, I'm out of there. If they're ready, they'll wiggle their way through it on their own. I don't have the emotional capacity to get involved in this, simply because I know how tricky cultivating a sustainable weight loss mentality can be.
Even if they're on the right track, listening to all the unavoidable stumbles would be too draining. I can offer distant generic advice, but I do my very best not to be part of anyone's weight loss attempt on a personal level. I feel for them, but I like my sanity.
Great post. I have attempted to help, encourage, get a few people started and it's not continued on for long enough for me to bother any more. No more of that for me any more.
Thanks for opening my eyes.
There are many great thoughts here. Mentally I am moving health discussions into the religious and political catagory.
For years I had the head knowledge my old WOE was killing me until I saw myself in my coffin I never did think of suicide by food being a real thing in my case.
Now I think change can only come from within and external words are worthless if not damming.
I know a few have made WOE improvements after watching me walk back my rate of health decline over the past few years. Words are worthless and sometimes positive example can be of some value to some. 8
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