Since thick is in, should I stay at 145 on my 5'2 frame
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veganbettie wrote: »do other women get mad at me if i'm looking really good and their guys check me out? Does that happen?
Apparently.
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amusedmonkey wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »TitaniaEcks wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »Ok help clarify this for me, and this is a serious non baiting honest question.
I'm walking along and in the the other direction comes a woman with her shirt half undone so her boobs are half hanging out, and to top this classy look off she's wearing those jeans shorts with half her butt cheeks hanging out.
Is it wrong of me to instantly think "Trash", because that's the first thing that comes to mind. Why is she so insecure in herself that she has to parade her body around to get attention??
I've got a decent set of boobs, which i cover up because i have absolutely no desire to be ogled by strange men. My self worth is not measured by how many guys perve on me that day!!
Now, if i go out dressed half naked and get perved on, i have no right to be pissed off because this was obviously my intention when i left the house this morning.
I don't know..... Perhaps i have more to offer the world than my banging body. And i choose not to be treated like an animal in the zoo and be leered at like a piece of meat.
For example when i go out walking i wear a baggy shirt and shorts. Why?? Because again, i don't want or need the attention. My husband gives me plenty of that!
Here's your answer: if being ogled bothers you, then you have the right to cover up. If she likes to be ogled, it's her right to show her goodies. Just because she enjoys sexual attention doesn't mean she doesn't have other things to offer as well. She could also be a brilliant artist who takes great pride in her paintings, for example. And it's not right of you to suggest she's inferior to you just because she enjoys sexual attention and you don't. Live and let live.
I didn't say she was inferior. My question was WHY. Why do some women crave and need that attention. In my opinion there's something wrong somewhere....
I can only guess, insecurity
Why do people in general crave attention? Because they're people. I don't understand why when that attention is directed at her personality or some good trait she has it's acceptable, but when it's directed at her body with consent it's not. Is the human body a thing to be ashamed of? Why is it acceptable to think of sexuality as something degrading (piece of meat) but not of other traits? I don't understand that disconnect between the body and mind. They both make a person, and a person can be proud of both, putting them both on display if they choose to without having to be judged as "trash" on "insecure".
That's an interesting way to think about it, good point. I'm going to try to remember that.0 -
amusedmonkey wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »TitaniaEcks wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »Ok help clarify this for me, and this is a serious non baiting honest question.
I'm walking along and in the the other direction comes a woman with her shirt half undone so her boobs are half hanging out, and to top this classy look off she's wearing those jeans shorts with half her butt cheeks hanging out.
Is it wrong of me to instantly think "Trash", because that's the first thing that comes to mind. Why is she so insecure in herself that she has to parade her body around to get attention??
I've got a decent set of boobs, which i cover up because i have absolutely no desire to be ogled by strange men. My self worth is not measured by how many guys perve on me that day!!
Now, if i go out dressed half naked and get perved on, i have no right to be pissed off because this was obviously my intention when i left the house this morning.
I don't know..... Perhaps i have more to offer the world than my banging body. And i choose not to be treated like an animal in the zoo and be leered at like a piece of meat.
For example when i go out walking i wear a baggy shirt and shorts. Why?? Because again, i don't want or need the attention. My husband gives me plenty of that!
Here's your answer: if being ogled bothers you, then you have the right to cover up. If she likes to be ogled, it's her right to show her goodies. Just because she enjoys sexual attention doesn't mean she doesn't have other things to offer as well. She could also be a brilliant artist who takes great pride in her paintings, for example. And it's not right of you to suggest she's inferior to you just because she enjoys sexual attention and you don't. Live and let live.
I didn't say she was inferior. My question was WHY. Why do some women crave and need that attention. In my opinion there's something wrong somewhere....
I can only guess, insecurity
Why do people in general crave attention? Because they're people. I don't understand why when that attention is directed at her personality or some good trait she has it's acceptable, but when it's directed at her body with consent it's not. Is the human body a thing to be ashamed of? Why is it acceptable to think of sexuality as something degrading (piece of meat) but not of other traits? I don't understand that disconnect between the body and mind. They both make a person, and a person can be proud of both, putting them both on display if they choose to without having to be judged as "trash" on "insecure".
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christinev297 wrote: »levitateme wrote: »PikaKnight wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »So what if her shirt's half undone, her boobs whatever, her butt whatever? Maybe she's comfortable, maybe she likes feeling however she feels. Maybe, she's a mom who's a bit too warm, like the person who posted minutes before you. Maybe she's the opposite of insecure. Maybe she's dressing that way entirely for herself because she enjoys living in her body.
Nope. Don't buy it..
I've known women like that who are very comfortable with their bodies not insecure in the way you are trying to claim.
I find it funny that most of the time these women are deemed trashy, attention seeking or are supposedly super insecure by those who are very insecure themselves.
Not saying that all women who dress a certain way are above the tearing down of other women, but it's pretty lame to make such judgmental generalizations.
It is lame. It's really gross to see women who are so misogynistic. If I see a girl wearing a bikini top and short shorts at the supermarket, I assume she is either on her way from or to the beach, not that she is desperate for attention.
what do you think your husband would be thinking...
That was a joke right? Because . . . misogynistic . . . what would your husband think . . . right?0 -
Im going to have to leave it here, because I don't see this getting resolved any time soon
and the further it goes the more chance I have of offending someone, Which is not my intention.
So I guess the "simple" answer is: some women crave and need attention, others don't.
I guess I wanted to know why the former feel this need and if or what happened in their life to make them like this.0 -
PikaKnight wrote: »veganbettie wrote: »do other women get mad at me if i'm looking really good and their guys check me out? Does that happen?
Apparently.
I better start wearing a bag over my head and a potato sack, cause I can't help it when i look super fly.
I'm really truly sorry ladies of the world.0 -
Not everything revolves around a man, not everything a girl does is for a man. Maybe she just likes that style, if shes confident, feels sexy, is happy how can you hate on that? Maybe that's how she feels she looks best, not everyone is into that conservative look, you think girls who dresses conservative can't be 'trashy'? Can't really judge a book by its cover because you'll be surprised.
I admire girls like that, who walk around showing their assets( purposely ) not giving a *kitten* what others think. Girls in general who have that attitude, fat, skinny, curvy, who are really confident in their body I admire.
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Paper or plastic? lolveganbettie wrote: »PikaKnight wrote: »veganbettie wrote: »do other women get mad at me if i'm looking really good and their guys check me out? Does that happen?
Apparently.
I better start wearing a bag over my head and a potato sack, cause I can't help it when i look super fly.
I'm really truly sorry ladies of the world.
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christinev297 wrote: »Im going to have to leave it here, because I don't see this getting resolved any time soon and the further it goes the more chance I have of offending someone, Which is not my intention.
So I guess the "simple" answer is: some women crave and need attention, others don't.
I guess I wanted to know why the former feel this need and if or what happened in their life to make them like this.
they feel happy in themselves and want to communicate it0 -
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christinev297 wrote: »Im going to have to leave it here, because I don't see this getting resolved any time soon and the further it goes the more chance I have of offending someone, Which is not my intention.
So I guess the "simple" answer is: some women crave and need attention, others don't.
I guess I wanted to know why the former feel this need and if or what happened in their life to make them like this.
Correction: nearly EVERYONE craves social validation and attention, to varying degrees - it's natural because we are social creatures. Some people choose to get it partially through their appearance, and there's nothing wrong with that. That's what you don't seem to understand.0 -
christinev297 wrote: »levitateme wrote: »PikaKnight wrote: »christinev297 wrote: »So what if her shirt's half undone, her boobs whatever, her butt whatever? Maybe she's comfortable, maybe she likes feeling however she feels. Maybe, she's a mom who's a bit too warm, like the person who posted minutes before you. Maybe she's the opposite of insecure. Maybe she's dressing that way entirely for herself because she enjoys living in her body.
Nope. Don't buy it..
I've known women like that who are very comfortable with their bodies not insecure in the way you are trying to claim.
I find it funny that most of the time these women are deemed trashy, attention seeking or are supposedly super insecure by those who are very insecure themselves.
Not saying that all women who dress a certain way are above the tearing down of other women, but it's pretty lame to make such judgmental generalizations.
It is lame. It's really gross to see women who are so misogynistic. If I see a girl wearing a bikini top and short shorts at the supermarket, I assume she is either on her way from or to the beach, not that she is desperate for attention.
what do you think your husband would be thinking...
My husband? Would say "Hey babe, look at that girls thighs."
And I'd go "Damn you right. You think she lifts? I bet she lifts. Gorgeous."
"Right. Hey we're out of lemon juice right?"
So. We'd both find this lady attractive, wonder at how she attains her fantastic look, and keep it pushing. But then I'm a short shorts and crop top girl, all day every day, husband on my arm, so I'm not sure why either of us would view her any differently than we view me.
Not that we're perverts out to take every hot girl we see home or make her uncomfortable but we do have eyes and we both appreciate pretty thick girls. We also notice more muscular women (I love a woman with muscles) and cute petite women. In all states of dress even. Wearing a button up long sleeve shirt doesn't make us not notice you, it just makes us wonder why you're so covered up in SoCal in April when it's 85 degrees.0 -
i'm 39, ok, and sometimes, christine, i go out in a dress and the fanciest shoes i can wear (they're flat fyi bc of my foot issues, i don't care) and i dance for 8 hours straight. i am not there to pick anyone up or show anyone up. i am there to dance and feel good in myself and my dress because i LOVE dancing and the music is amazing and life is damned short.
and, i like seeing everyone else looking great and having a good time.0 -
Paper or plastic? lolveganbettie wrote: »PikaKnight wrote: »veganbettie wrote: »do other women get mad at me if i'm looking really good and their guys check me out? Does that happen?
Apparently.
I better start wearing a bag over my head and a potato sack, cause I can't help it when i look super fly.
I'm really truly sorry ladies of the world.
Well they are trying to ban plastic bags in Southern California, and in most places I would get a discount if I use reusable bags so I might go with canvas.0 -
First and foremost, above all else, learn to love the skin you're in. This is true for overweight people as well as skinny people.
If you can't love yourself as you are, then no amount of weight loss will help. (my opinion of course). I tend to be the kind who finds super skinny women
to be unattractive. I love my wife's form the way it is, and she doesn't have to change a thing as far as I'm concerned. If your doctor says you are healthy,
and you feel comfortable in your body, then you can certainly stop where you are now.
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I envy the people who are coming in, reading the OP, leaving their comment and moving on completely unaware of the absolute dumpster fire this thread has become.0
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but its a very eye opening, entertaining dumpster fire.0
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christinev297 wrote: »Im going to have to leave it here, because I don't see this getting resolved any time soon and the further it goes the more chance I have of offending someone, Which is not my intention.
So I guess the "simple" answer is: some women crave and need attention, others don't.
I guess I wanted to know why the former feel this need and if or what happened in their life to make them like this.
Why did something have to happen in their lives to prefer a certain style? Don't you see something wrong with the thought that if a man wants to get in shape and take his shirt off it's ok, but if a woman gets in shape and shows off her hard work by wearing revealing clothes it's bad? Wow.
From your comments, it honestly seems like you're the insecure one. It seems like you're intimidated by these women. Why are we so afraid of the female body that it has to be covered and shielded so as not to torment the poor little fragile men who can't help but to look *tear*. What's wrong with having a little fun in life? Not everyone is uptight.0 -
galvitron1 wrote: »First and foremost, above all else, learn to love the skin you're in. This is true for overweight people as well as skinny people.
If you can't love yourself as you are, then no amount of weight loss will help. (my opinion of course). I tend to be the kind who finds super skinny women
to be unattractive. I love my wife's form the way it is, and she doesn't have to change a thing as far as I'm concerned. If your doctor says you are healthy,
and you feel comfortable in your body, then you can certainly stop where you are now.
That is so sweet what you said about your wife. Yep, I'm starting to love the skin im in, i actually kind of always did but the more I lost weight I'm like whoa mama I can look even better??
thanks
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ILiftHeavyAcrylics wrote: »I envy the people who are coming in, reading the OP, leaving their comment and moving on completely unaware of the absolute dumpster fire this thread has become.
But they're missing the marshmallows.
I find this all enlightening. Like are there women like Fran and Christine silently calling me trashy if I run into sprouts in my shorts and crop top/bikini top? Does the judgement lessen if I'm in the presence of a man (as a husband's thoughts are clearly more important than our own) what is the clothing to skin to trashy attention seemed ratio? Are we allotted non trash points if we live in hot areas?
So many questions.0
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