We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....

A_Patient_Wolf

She tasted too good, I was getting enough real food

g44219

haha he was a cannibal

A_Patient_Wolf

Completely detached from the realities of eating delicious things... Sorry to break it to you man but THINGS MUST DIE...

g44219

we fought over what meat to grill and what beer to buy. I think we killed the thread for a while.

Darklords

pfft he always bought the wrong beer and overcooked the steak

g44219

she complained about everything

Darklords

he never did as he was told

g44219

she got a little bossy so I hit her with a snowball

Darklords

buried me in the snow..not just a snowball!

g44219

she told me to shovel the driveway. She didn't say where to dump the snow

Darklords

he promised to take me someplace warmer then set me in front of an open oven door

srv524

She tried to push me into the oven

slimgirljo15

Didn't understand I just wanted him to clean it..

Kvm11628

Always like things just a little too clean.

srv524

Wouldn't clean the oven with my tongue

slimgirljo15

Liked to clean everything with his tongue
Waiiit...come back...

Kvm11628

That one liked things a little too dirty.

srv524

She didn't like things dirty enough

slimgirljo15

He liked it dirty with the whole neighbourhood

srv524

She was a prude

Kvm11628

He was terrible at reading people.

srv524

I chose not to read mean people

Kvm11628

He missed out on a lot of good things in life.

srv524

After many interactions with her, I realized that she was not one of those good things

Kvm11628

He broke my heart.

srv524

She's as cold as ice and was willing to sacrifice our love

Kvm11628

He just stopped trying to warm me up.

srv524

She'd need a flamethrower to warm her up.

Kvm11628

He wasn't willing to go the distance.

srv524

I was going for speed