Why do people lock their diaries?
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some people in the forums like to judge. If I leave it open, I feel like I'm going to post in a forum, someone is going to make a comment as to why I'm wrong and bring up my diary in some way. My friends can see what I eat, however.
I think people are way more worried about this than it actually happens, though. I've never been contacted out of the blue about my diary or had people make uninvited comments, and even my friends have never said anything negative except on occasion when I ate below 1200 (so I've started including explanations on the rare occasions that I do). (Maybe others interact with judgier people, though, I dunno.)
I'm curious about the circumstances when others got comments or if they are simply assuming that they would.
Anyway, I see no reason why people should open their diaries if they don't want to, as I can see why it could feel uncomfortable or make logging harder.0 -
Geekymonkey99 wrote: »marissafit06 wrote: »Mine is open to friends. Sometimes when I have having trouble I look through other people's diaries to get ideas, but I don't track people's food regularly. I don't really care what other people eat and find it odd that people would care what I eat. I also eat a lot of sweets and always have. I am somewhat embarrassed for strangers to know that there are days when half my calories are from goodies.
why are you embarrassed by that?
Exactly. I actually WANT people to know, because I prove you can lose weight and still eat copious amounts of sweets.
That's actually a good question @SezxyStef . Honestly the only reason I have any weight to lose is because I overdo it on sweets. I understand portion control and practice moderation when it comes to other foods. Knowing that I put on 20lbs because of cookies is somewhat depressing.0 -
Becuase they don't feel having total strangers have access to all their personal information. What could be more personal than what you ate during the day. Are you really surprised by that?
I don't disagree with your point, but quite a few things, in fact.
But I mostly eat where others can see me, so don't really think of it as super private.
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I had mine open when I first came to MFP and I was logging absolutely everything I ate so I could find out exactly how much I was really eating every day - one day I managed to polish off an entire family sized bag of potato chips and I logged it... and one of my "friends" made a comment on my profile saying something along the lines of "did you REALLY eat an entire bag??" I was mortified... and for the next couple of weeks I lied thru my teeth in my diary; only posting the good stuff.. thankfully as I began to learn about nutrition and got a lot of help from the many MFP's who are always willing to share their knowledge and answer questions, I remembered WHY I came here.. that I was using this site for ME. And realized how incredibly stupid it was of me to let a comment from anyone stop me from using this site and the tools it offers for MY purposes. So I closed my diary because it's there for ME, nobody else. I have opened it in the past year to my friends because they feel the same way, and truth be told because they are far better cooks than I am, and they know I openly troll their diaries for ideas and recipes with their blessing lol.0
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Creepyness!
For example, mine was open to friends only.
I closed it to private and a MFP "friend" sent me a message and stated, why can't I access your diary, the other day your profile and diary were open? Did I do something wrong??
I actually felt violated that there was someone on my friends list going into my diary every day or week.. I decided that I would get over that and open it..
But none the less, freakin creeeeeeeeeeeeeppppppppy...
Some people have different expectations about what being on someones friends list entails. Some people like to look at others diaries. So they can get an idea what people are eating for their calorie allowance, believe it or not some diaries can be quite interesting, especually from people in different countries. Its just data.
If its important to you then state it on your profile so people can decide whether they want to friend you at the start.
Occasionally if im working with someone on my friends list or I find they are in trouble Im able to look at their diary and give suggestions. I look to see if they are logging at all, that they arent starving themselves or if on a binge get an idea about it. I doubt people are going though your diary every day because they tend to be very dull.0 -
Mine is open. I don't care what people say about it. Obviously what I'm doing is working for me.
I do like looking at people's diaries though - not to judge or feel superior. I'm always looking for new food to try or new dishes to make. I'm not trying to be invasive or creepy and it doesn't bother me at all if someone has their diary locked.0 -
Mine is unlocked for friends, same as my home0
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marissafit06 wrote: »Geekymonkey99 wrote: »marissafit06 wrote: »Mine is open to friends. Sometimes when I have having trouble I look through other people's diaries to get ideas, but I don't track people's food regularly. I don't really care what other people eat and find it odd that people would care what I eat. I also eat a lot of sweets and always have. I am somewhat embarrassed for strangers to know that there are days when half my calories are from goodies.
why are you embarrassed by that?
Exactly. I actually WANT people to know, because I prove you can lose weight and still eat copious amounts of sweets.
That's actually a good question @SezxyStef . Honestly the only reason I have any weight to lose is because I overdo it on sweets. I understand portion control and practice moderation when it comes to other foods. Knowing that I put on 20lbs because of cookies is somewhat depressing.
I put on 40 pounds from cookies (emotional eating), but that was because I typically had 3000 calorie days without exercise. Since logging, I've found I can still eat a lot of cookies as long as I stay under my calorie goal for the day (with exercise to help), and now I've lost 23 pounds and 7% body fat doing so.0 -
ILiftHeavyAcrylics wrote: »But when people I don't know read my diary it's more like if a stranger was just standing outside my window watching me eat a sandwich. Idk. It seems weird to me.
It is kind of funny. I'm not really interested in what other people eat (unless they make it an issue by asking for comments or why they aren't losing or, on occasion, claiming to eat in a particular way in an obnoxious matter, because I'm weak like that), and I find the idea of getting ideas by looking in someone's diary odd, since tastes are so different. I look on food blogs or cookbooks or in restaurant menus for ideas. But at a restaurant I do sometimes notice what other people (not in my party) order and think "hmm, maybe that's what I should get, what is it?"0 -
my diary is open to all, but I could care less if someone has theirs on private..
OP - I think you need a strong dose of MYOB....
I second the MYOB...or the "just worry about yourself".
Mine is private because like another poster said... I've got enough judgement in real life, I don't need someone scrutinizing the beer I drink or the m&m's I eat. I have a passcode, so if someone really wants to see my diary, they can ask me for the code. Some days I log more than others, and some less... and I find that when I can have my privacy, I am more honest with logging.
If I had issues where I need advice on my diary or help, then I'll open it up. Until then, if someone really wants to know how I'm doing...they can ask about my methods.
Also to this...beemerphile1 wrote: »Not just diary, why do people make their profile private? There is nothing in my profile that will enable someone to show up at my house or work so there is no need for privacy.
When people post on here I will sometimes look at their profile to figure out where they are at in this journey. Weight, age, sex, height, can all be pertinent information to understanding the person's post.
Again, feel free to shoot a PM and ask a person for their information. People put private information including weight, age, sex, height or "stats" in their profiles. Some people prefer to have this information only seen to the people they can control on their friends list. Not everyone feels comfortable sharing their information in a public forum. Some people are very private.
I once had an acquaintance who I wasn't particularly friendly with (knew them IRL...was not friends on here) find me and start scrutinizing my information. Sent a rather nasty PM to me regarding a couple of forum replies I made and some information in my profile. After that, I put it private.
Then again, most of my social media is set up for privacy as well.0 -
When I've had stalled weight loss, I like to allow my friends to look at my food diary and make recommendations. I also like to see what my friends eat, especially the ones in other countries. The differences and similarities can be interesting.0
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beemerphile1 wrote: »Not just diary, why do people make their profile private? There is nothing in my profile that will enable someone to show up at my house or work so there is no need for privacy.
When people post on here I will sometimes look at their profile to figure out where they are at in this journey. Weight, age, sex, height, can all be pertinent information to understanding the person's post.
Don't you like climax? How boring?
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Mine is open to friends but I am not surprised if someone else doesn't want theirs open to anyone. Like I am zero intrest in linking sites like these with my FB and having it annouce that I have lost weight. Pretty sure the random 20 something who worked for me a few years ago doesn't need to know his old boss is trying to drop weight. People on here I don't mind but that doesn't mean I want non friends looking at my dairy. So cool if you want it open but don't judge or be surprised when others don't.lemurcat12 wrote: »Becuase they don't feel having total strangers have access to all their personal information. What could be more personal than what you ate during the day. Are you really surprised by that?
I don't disagree with your point, but quite a few things, in fact.
But I mostly eat where others can see me, so don't really think of it as super private.
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ILiftHeavyAcrylics wrote: »I think one of the other reasons I don't' mind having it open is that other people IRL SEE me eat the food I've logged... sure, they don't all see everything I've eaten, but strangers still see me eat food. I have no problem now with eating in front of people (it used to gross me out growing up), so to me this is a very similar thing. Plus if it helps people get ideas of what kind of foods they can eat while still losing weight (i.e. any food) and how to log accurately (i.e. weighing solids, measuring liquids) then I'm cool with having voyeurs!
I think the voyeurism aspect is what bothers me about the idea. Although, it certainly bothers me less now than it did when I joined the site. When I go out to eat with other people or share a meal with them it's communal. I'm eating, they're eating, we're talking. It's all very social. But when people I don't know read my diary it's more like if a stranger was just standing outside my window watching me eat a sandwich. Idk. It seems weird to me.
I used to not feel comfortable even eating around family in a restaurant. I didn't want my family to see me eat because it just felt gross. Didn't like watching people eat either.... I wonder if maybe I had food issues relating to body issues even at that age? But now I'll stuff my face while surrounded by strangers on the train lol. So yeah... strangers HAVE watched me eat. I eat in the middle of class, I eat walking around places.... so it's just not something that bothers me. Food isn't a private thing to me, it's just food, I enjoy it, other people eat food, so I don't feel like my privacy is being invaded if people know what I ate for breakfast kwim?
The only time I have an issue with people not having a public diary is when they post on the forums about their weight loss issues and people ask them to make their diary open so people can see if they are logging accurately or not.. and then they don't open it. That's just irritating.0 -
beemerphile1 wrote: »My diary is open to all. I really don't care what anyone thinks, it is working for me.
Same here!!! It doesn't matter!!0 -
Because I had someone whom I wasn't friends with try to judge my food choices. I've been losing weight eating these things, so laughing that it's not "clean" won't do you any favors. People on my friends list can see it, and they've seen my progress.0
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I personally keep it locked because I had way too many people commenting and judging what I ate. Granted, I don't eat the best things all the time, but that's for me to figure out. Not for my MFP "friends" to judge me for. Obviously I got here because I wasn't eating that great to begin with. And it's going to take some time to fix it. So until I have figured it out, my diary will stay locked. I judge myself enough, I don't need other people to do it.0
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Mine is open to friends but I am not surprised if someone else doesn't want theirs open to anyone. Like I am zero intrest in linking sites like these with my FB and having it annouce that I have lost weight. Pretty sure the random 20 something who worked for me a few years ago doesn't need to know his old boss is trying to drop weight.
Heh, could not agree with this more. The obsession with linking things to FB in general is weird, but then I have such a conflicted relationship with being on FB anyway (which is my issue, obviously).People on here I don't mind but that doesn't mean I want non friends looking at my dairy. So cool if you want it open but don't judge or be surprised when others don't.
In that you quoted me I am assuming this is directed to me and am puzzled, since I said nothing to suggest that I want anyone else's profile [edit: meant diary, but profile works too] open or judge or whatever.
If you were directing that to the OP never mind, but you can see why I'd be confused. All I said (kind of jokingly) is that lots of things are more personal than what I eat.lemurcat12 wrote: »Becuase they don't feel having total strangers have access to all their personal information. What could be more personal than what you ate during the day. Are you really surprised by that?
I don't disagree with your point, but quite a few things, in fact.
But I mostly eat where others can see me, so don't really think of it as super private.
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ILiftHeavyAcrylics wrote: »I think one of the other reasons I don't' mind having it open is that other people IRL SEE me eat the food I've logged... sure, they don't all see everything I've eaten, but strangers still see me eat food. I have no problem now with eating in front of people (it used to gross me out growing up), so to me this is a very similar thing. Plus if it helps people get ideas of what kind of foods they can eat while still losing weight (i.e. any food) and how to log accurately (i.e. weighing solids, measuring liquids) then I'm cool with having voyeurs!
I think the voyeurism aspect is what bothers me about the idea. Although, it certainly bothers me less now than it did when I joined the site. When I go out to eat with other people or share a meal with them it's communal. I'm eating, they're eating, we're talking. It's all very social. But when people I don't know read my diary it's more like if a stranger was just standing outside my window watching me eat a sandwich. Idk. It seems weird to me.
I used to not feel comfortable even eating around family in a restaurant. I didn't want my family to see me eat because it just felt gross. Didn't like watching people eat either.... I wonder if maybe I had food issues relating to body issues even at that age? But now I'll stuff my face while surrounded by strangers on the train lol. So yeah... strangers HAVE watched me eat. I eat in the middle of class, I eat walking around places.... so it's just not something that bothers me. Food isn't a private thing to me, it's just food, I enjoy it, other people eat food, so I don't feel like my privacy is being invaded if people know what I ate for breakfast kwim?
The only time I have an issue with people not having a public diary is when they post on the forums about their weight loss issues and people ask them to make their diary open so people can see if they are logging accurately or not.. and then they don't open it. That's just irritating.
I can see that point of view also. Truthfully it really doesn't bother me so much as it just seems like an odd thing to do. It used to bother me. I really wouldn't compare it to people seeing me eating on the train, which I would totally do, unless those people came and sat across from me and just intently watched me eat. :laugh:
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For me, mostly because there are people on these forums who, if a discussion on the boards isn't going their way, will snoop in your diary and use it against you. Sort of a grown-up version of "I know you are, but what am I". It's tiresome. Only my friends can see my diary.0
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i'm just curious, because I'm looking to see what people who have successfully lost weight are eating. I have my own solid foundation of what I should and shouldn't be eating, but it gets boring sometimes. Is it something people are afraid to share??
Why would I open it? I'm not asking for advice, it's just my own personal record.
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beemerphile1 wrote: »Not just diary, why do people make their profile private? There is nothing in my profile that will enable someone to show up at my house or work so there is no need for privacy.
When people post on here I will sometimes look at their profile to figure out where they are at in this journey. Weight, age, sex, height, can all be pertinent information to understanding the person's post.
Don't you like climax? How boring?
Why yes I do in fact! But maybe you meant to use the word suspense rather than climax?
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I am just responding to the OP; I haven't read everyone's responses. For me, I keep track for myself. I am just getting back into tracking and frankly I don't need or want comments on what I'm eating. I know all my choices aren't the best but for now I'm concentrating on logging it all even if it puts me over.0
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Some ppl are very judgmental that is why. If I am asking for help with my diet in the forums and then it is still locked might be a different story.0
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Mostly because I am ashamed of how poorly I eat.0
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What I eat now is not what I ate to lose weight so my current diary wouldn't be very helpful to anyone else as I basically eat what I want in moderation.0
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I have over a decade of history with eating disorders and how I eat is personal and shared only between my loved ones and medical professionals. I take pictures of meals and post on TwoGrand, but having someone intimately acquainted with my vitamins and supplements and food issues makes me incredibly uncomfortable.0
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Because I tend to be paranoid, espically with my information online. I know logically there's nothing in there that will become an issue, but keeping it private to friends only is the only way to keep that paranoid part of me quiet.0
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ILiftHeavyAcrylics wrote: »ILiftHeavyAcrylics wrote: »I think one of the other reasons I don't' mind having it open is that other people IRL SEE me eat the food I've logged... sure, they don't all see everything I've eaten, but strangers still see me eat food. I have no problem now with eating in front of people (it used to gross me out growing up), so to me this is a very similar thing. Plus if it helps people get ideas of what kind of foods they can eat while still losing weight (i.e. any food) and how to log accurately (i.e. weighing solids, measuring liquids) then I'm cool with having voyeurs!
I think the voyeurism aspect is what bothers me about the idea. Although, it certainly bothers me less now than it did when I joined the site. When I go out to eat with other people or share a meal with them it's communal. I'm eating, they're eating, we're talking. It's all very social. But when people I don't know read my diary it's more like if a stranger was just standing outside my window watching me eat a sandwich. Idk. It seems weird to me.
I used to not feel comfortable even eating around family in a restaurant. I didn't want my family to see me eat because it just felt gross. Didn't like watching people eat either.... I wonder if maybe I had food issues relating to body issues even at that age? But now I'll stuff my face while surrounded by strangers on the train lol. So yeah... strangers HAVE watched me eat. I eat in the middle of class, I eat walking around places.... so it's just not something that bothers me. Food isn't a private thing to me, it's just food, I enjoy it, other people eat food, so I don't feel like my privacy is being invaded if people know what I ate for breakfast kwim?
The only time I have an issue with people not having a public diary is when they post on the forums about their weight loss issues and people ask them to make their diary open so people can see if they are logging accurately or not.. and then they don't open it. That's just irritating.
I can see that point of view also. Truthfully it really doesn't bother me so much as it just seems like an odd thing to do. It used to bother me. I really wouldn't compare it to people seeing me eating on the train, which I would totally do, unless those people came and sat across from me and just intently watched me eat. :laugh:
I should start doing this, I'll make so many friends!!!!!0 -
OP - just curious & no judgment here, but Why do YOU have YOURS set to private? 0
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