How can I get toned with strength training without looking bulky?

Options
1246711

Replies

  • shadow2soul
    shadow2soul Posts: 7,692 Member
    Options
    5'1", and last time I checked I weighed 115.8 lbs. I have a couple more pounds to go before I'm done cutting, but I don't want to end up skinny fat and still have my arms jiggle when I walk. I certainly don't want to look bulky. I just want a flat stomach and legs that don't sag or rub together. I don't have any equipment except for two three pounds weights that I found in my closet. I don't have a big enough budget for any more than that. Any advice?

    What exactly do you consider bulky? Can you link to any pictures of exactly what your wanting in terms of body composition.

    For example, the awesome woman in this link:
    http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2011/07/21/meet-staci-your-new-powerlifting-super-hero/
    I think her body looks awesome.
  • Nerdycurls
    Nerdycurls Posts: 143 Member
    Options
    jemhh wrote: »
    Nerdycurls wrote: »
    Is it really true the not getting bulky part applies to all women, regardless of health issues?

    With PCOS and all that you know, free testosterone floating around in my system, I've noticed I DO get bulkier when I lift. Even light weights. Isn't it true if you lift to the point of muscle exhaustion, you will end up getting bigger to some degree? Even if it's lighter weights?

    One of the reasons why I am somewhat wary of upper body weight work is because of how chunky I look. My legs and butt could certainly use more mass, but I don't want to end up with some thick upper body where I have a fused shoulder/neck thing going on.

    We are all different shapes and some people tend to build easier in some areas than others but even with PCOS you have to be very dedicated to lifting and do it for quite a while (and not while eating at a deficit) to build muscle. And even that amount of muscle isn't necessarily going to make you bulky. I'm saying necessarily because clearly everybody has different ideas as to what is bulky. But avoiding upper body work and only doing lower body work is likely going to have you ending up looking pretty soft on top.

    And do you really have that much testosterone floating around? I have PCOS too and like to dream that any extra testosterone I have may help with lifting but I'm pretty sure that even a PCOSer with elevated levels has only a fraction of what a man has. (Trying to find a source for this.)

    To be exact, the bulkiness was at its worst when I was at my heaviest-- and with the worst PCOS symptoms. That was years ago, but since then I've really shied away from lifting a lot.

    I only lift 2 times a week. I do heavier on my lower body, but am careful with my upper. A few years ago when I decided to just lift anyway because I could use the strength in my upper body (I also had joint/tendon issues), a coworker told me she could tell I was working out...because I started looking "butch." Yeah, that is NOT what I want to hear.
  • Nerdycurls
    Nerdycurls Posts: 143 Member
    Options
    5'1", and last time I checked I weighed 115.8 lbs. I have a couple more pounds to go before I'm done cutting, but I don't want to end up skinny fat and still have my arms jiggle when I walk. I certainly don't want to look bulky. I just want a flat stomach and legs that don't sag or rub together. I don't have any equipment except for two three pounds weights that I found in my closet. I don't have a big enough budget for any more than that. Any advice?

    What exactly do you consider bulky? Can you link to any pictures of exactly what your wanting in terms of body composition.

    For example, the awesome woman in this link:
    http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2011/07/21/meet-staci-your-new-powerlifting-super-hero/
    I think her body looks awesome.

    I agree, her body looks great but she definitely doesn't have that "bulky" look.

    https://itrainthereforeieat.files.wordpress.com/2014/01/jessica-beal.jpg

    Jessica's arms are a bit bulky-- this is what happens with my arms. In my opinion-- for myself and from what other women with broad shoulders have said, this look makes you appear bulkier.

    Same with these:

    http://www.leighpeele.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/bulky-female-arms.jpg

    After I got tendinitis the PT admonished me to strengthen my upper body, but like most women I'm afraid to.
  • Emilia777
    Emilia777 Posts: 978 Member
    Options
    ^ well, then that wasn't muscle, it was fat.
    Nerdycurls wrote: »
    5'1", and last time I checked I weighed 115.8 lbs. I have a couple more pounds to go before I'm done cutting, but I don't want to end up skinny fat and still have my arms jiggle when I walk. I certainly don't want to look bulky. I just want a flat stomach and legs that don't sag or rub together. I don't have any equipment except for two three pounds weights that I found in my closet. I don't have a big enough budget for any more than that. Any advice?

    What exactly do you consider bulky? Can you link to any pictures of exactly what your wanting in terms of body composition.

    For example, the awesome woman in this link:
    http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2011/07/21/meet-staci-your-new-powerlifting-super-hero/
    I think her body looks awesome.

    I agree, her body looks great but she definitely doesn't have that "bulky" look.

    https://itrainthereforeieat.files.wordpress.com/2014/01/jessica-beal.jpg

    Jessica's arms are a bit bulky-- this is what happens with my arms. In my opinion-- for myself and from what other women with broad shoulders have said, this look makes you appear bulkier.

    Same with these:

    http://www.leighpeele.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/bulky-female-arms.jpg

    After I got tendinitis the PT admonished me to strengthen my upper body, but like most women I'm afraid to.

    I still don't get why (1) these examples are "bulky" and (2) why that's a bad thing, but everyone can obviously want whatever body they want. I'd kill to be as muscular and lean as any of those women. However, that does not happen easily: it's a combination of having muscle mass and low body fat. It takes work to achieve that, and it doesn't happen by accident, so those who don't want this type of look have nothing to fear. I've been cutting for over 3 months and lifting heavy and my arms don't look anywhere near that shapely.
  • Nerdycurls
    Nerdycurls Posts: 143 Member
    Options
    Emilia777 wrote: »
    ^ well, then that wasn't muscle, it was fat.

    How could that be fat when it was the result of a 30 pound loss?
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
    Options
    Nerdycurls wrote: »
    jemhh wrote: »
    Nerdycurls wrote: »
    Is it really true the not getting bulky part applies to all women, regardless of health issues?

    With PCOS and all that you know, free testosterone floating around in my system, I've noticed I DO get bulkier when I lift. Even light weights. Isn't it true if you lift to the point of muscle exhaustion, you will end up getting bigger to some degree? Even if it's lighter weights?

    One of the reasons why I am somewhat wary of upper body weight work is because of how chunky I look. My legs and butt could certainly use more mass, but I don't want to end up with some thick upper body where I have a fused shoulder/neck thing going on.

    We are all different shapes and some people tend to build easier in some areas than others but even with PCOS you have to be very dedicated to lifting and do it for quite a while (and not while eating at a deficit) to build muscle. And even that amount of muscle isn't necessarily going to make you bulky. I'm saying necessarily because clearly everybody has different ideas as to what is bulky. But avoiding upper body work and only doing lower body work is likely going to have you ending up looking pretty soft on top.

    And do you really have that much testosterone floating around? I have PCOS too and like to dream that any extra testosterone I have may help with lifting but I'm pretty sure that even a PCOSer with elevated levels has only a fraction of what a man has. (Trying to find a source for this.)

    To be exact, the bulkiness was at its worst when I was at my heaviest-- and with the worst PCOS symptoms. That was years ago, but since then I've really shied away from lifting a lot.

    I only lift 2 times a week. I do heavier on my lower body, but am careful with my upper. A few years ago when I decided to just lift anyway because I could use the strength in my upper body (I also had joint/tendon issues), a coworker told me she could tell I was working out...because I started looking "butch." Yeah, that is NOT what I want to hear.

    All I can say is that I wouldn't put much stock in the opinion anybody who told me that I was starting to look "butch." Good grief.

    I don't consider Jessica Beal's arms to be bulky in that photo. The other photos--the lady with all the kids (can't remember her name) and Madonna? Their arms are muscular but not what I would call bulky. Madonna's show more because of her lower body fat. I like the look of Supermom's but to each her own. If that's not what you want, that's not what you want.
  • shadow2soul
    shadow2soul Posts: 7,692 Member
    Options
    Nerdycurls wrote: »
    5'1", and last time I checked I weighed 115.8 lbs. I have a couple more pounds to go before I'm done cutting, but I don't want to end up skinny fat and still have my arms jiggle when I walk. I certainly don't want to look bulky. I just want a flat stomach and legs that don't sag or rub together. I don't have any equipment except for two three pounds weights that I found in my closet. I don't have a big enough budget for any more than that. Any advice?

    What exactly do you consider bulky? Can you link to any pictures of exactly what your wanting in terms of body composition.

    For example, the awesome woman in this link:
    http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2011/07/21/meet-staci-your-new-powerlifting-super-hero/
    I think her body looks awesome.

    I agree, her body looks great but she definitely doesn't have that "bulky" look.

    https://itrainthereforeieat.files.wordpress.com/2014/01/jessica-beal.jpg

    Jessica's arms are a bit bulky-- this is what happens with my arms. In my opinion-- for myself and from what other women with broad shoulders have said, this look makes you appear bulkier.

    Same with these:

    http://www.leighpeele.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/bulky-female-arms.jpg

    After I got tendinitis the PT admonished me to strengthen my upper body, but like most women I'm afraid to.

    See while those are bulky to you, to me they look great. Difference in opinions. That's why I am curious as to what the OP consider bulky. For me, I remember when I was a kid and my mom worked at a gym. They had pictures of body builders on the walls and I thought one was a guy at first. On closer inspection of the picture though it was a woman. So for me, bulky lines more up with that and like the women on this page:
    http://www.totalprosports.com/2011/08/09/11-incredibly-muscular-female-competitive-bodybuilders/
  • Emilia777
    Emilia777 Posts: 978 Member
    edited June 2015
    Options
    Nerdycurls wrote: »
    Emilia777 wrote: »
    ^ well, then that wasn't muscle, it was fat.

    How could that be fat when it was the result of a 30 pound loss?

    Whoops, I posted that by mistake. I couldn't find a way to re formulate it without sounding awful. Sorry lol. You said that you thought you saw bulkiness at your heaviest. What I meant is that I think it's unlikely a person with low body fat (something I'm still working towards!!) would look bulky. But then you posted explanatory photos and I see that you would define low body fat as bulky also. So this makes my comment redundant.

    Edited to add: if someone told me I looked butch, I'd ask them if they want some peanut butter to go with their jelly (to quote a friend on MFP). I bet you looked awesome.
  • Nerdycurls
    Nerdycurls Posts: 143 Member
    Options
    It's not that I'm against some muscle definition. I'm sure if most women were to flex you'd see a bit of a muscle bulge. Unfortunately, having PCOS makes me more cognizant of wanting to look female, since I have to deal with side issues like hair and all.
  • Emilia777
    Emilia777 Posts: 978 Member
    edited June 2015
    Options
    Nerdycurls wrote: »
    It's not that I'm against some muscle definition. I'm sure if most women were to flex you'd see a bit of a muscle bulge. Unfortunately, having PCOS makes me more cognizant of wanting to look female, since I have to deal with side issues like hair and all.

    I can appreciate that, and my sympathies for having to deal with it. I personally think, though, that being feminine (or not) is all about your attitude: there is nothing preventing you from feeling and acting like a total siren, no matter your build or body type.
  • pollypocket1021
    pollypocket1021 Posts: 533 Member
    Options

    jemhh wrote: »
    Nerdycurls wrote: »
    Is it really true the not getting bulky part applies to all women, regardless of health issues?

    With PCOS and all that you know, free testosterone floating around in my system, I've noticed I DO get bulkier when I lift. Even light weights. Isn't it true if you lift to the point of muscle exhaustion, you will end up getting bigger to some degree? Even if it's lighter weights?

    One of the reasons why I am somewhat wary of upper body weight work is because of how chunky I look. My legs and butt could certainly use more mass, but I don't want to end up with some thick upper body where I have a fused shoulder/neck thing going on.

    We are all different shapes and some people tend to build easier in some areas than others but even with PCOS you have to be very dedicated to lifting and do it for quite a while (and not while eating at a deficit) to build muscle. And even that amount of muscle isn't necessarily going to make you bulky. I'm saying necessarily because clearly everybody has different ideas as to what is bulky. But avoiding upper body work and only doing lower body work is likely going to have you ending up looking pretty soft on top.

    And do you really have that much testosterone floating around? I have PCOS too and like to dream that any extra testosterone I have may help with lifting but I'm pretty sure that even a PCOSer with elevated levels has only a fraction of what a man has. (Trying to find a source for this.)

    Women with PCOS tend to have very low sex hormone binding globulin. So while total serum testosterone may be within normal to fairly elevated (100-300), the free testosterone tends to be disproportionately high. It can approach the levels seen in males (free, not total).

    Building muscles is hard work, regardless, but im willing to buy that some women with untreated PCOS may have an easier time building muscle.
  • astrampe
    astrampe Posts: 2,169 Member
    Options
    Nerdycurls wrote: »
    Btw I would love to have Alix Newton's arms. They look slender and sleek, but I'm sure she's very strong. My arms always get this weird muscled bumpy look going on.
    Weird muscled bumpy look?? It is actually quite normal, as nobody has ons single muscle from shoulder to wrist......
  • Kelly79L
    Kelly79L Posts: 12 Member
    Options
    I feel the need to comment although I hate posting on these forums as I know somebody will jump on me but I understand the body issue that you are having, I too have a more muscular build than the svelte lean models and stars that I would love to look like, it's not going to happen, it's like a flat chested woman trying to grow boobs, the more weight I have lost the more my biceps pop out but it's far more attractive than fat and where I have been left with a bit of excess skin from losing weight and being a cardio bunny I have decided to embrace the fit girl inside and start lifting because let's face it, there was never a skinny girl inside, that said I'm still having to work hard at building on what I naturally have, fat loss is making me look "bulkier" than lifting weights so you have a decision to make, have excess fat to cover your muscles or look fit, well that's my experience anyway
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
    edited June 2015
    Options
    I flexed my biceps at a family dinner and my sister said 'eurgh I don't like muscles on women' so I just relaxed and said 'do my arms look big?'

    she said no they look great they've got great tone - see .. muscles ..

    and I love them and think they look great .. relaxed my arms and legs are toned and shapely slim... it takes effort to get muscles and to show them

    I choose to wear vest tops .. it's shocking to me that a year ago I'd do anything to hide my upper arms

    what matters is how you feel and I have to tell you feeling strong and fit feels really f'ing sexy!

  • ExRelaySprinter
    ExRelaySprinter Posts: 874 Member
    edited June 2015
    Options
    Nerdycurls wrote: »
    5'1", and last time I checked I weighed 115.8 lbs. I have a couple more pounds to go before I'm done cutting, but I don't want to end up skinny fat and still have my arms jiggle when I walk. I certainly don't want to look bulky. I just want a flat stomach and legs that don't sag or rub together. I don't have any equipment except for two three pounds weights that I found in my closet. I don't have a big enough budget for any more than that. Any advice?

    What exactly do you consider bulky? Can you link to any pictures of exactly what your wanting in terms of body composition.

    For example, the awesome woman in this link:
    http://www.nerdfitness.com/blog/2011/07/21/meet-staci-your-new-powerlifting-super-hero/
    I think her body looks awesome.

    https://itrainthereforeieat.files.wordpress.com/2014/01/jessica-beal.jpg

    Jessica's arms are a bit bulky-- this is what happens with my arms. In my opinion-- for myself and from what other women with broad shoulders have said, this look makes you appear bulkier.

    Same with these:

    http://www.leighpeele.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/bulky-female-arms.jpg

    After I got tendinitis the PT admonished me to strengthen my upper body, but like most women I'm afraid to.

    I'm gonna be in the minority here, but i agree with you Nerdycurls.
    Jessica does look somewhat bulky to me as well, moreso around the shoulders. I've seen her with more body fat and she looks great!
    The other Lady and Madonna's arms look a bit too Muscular ("for my taste") and this is how my arms looked when i used to go on the Rowing Machine at the Gym!
    I don't tend to work on my arms anymore tbh.
    Not an ideal look, for me.


  • stevencloser
    stevencloser Posts: 8,911 Member
    Options
    I still can't get over how someone would be able to consider Madonna's stick arms as muscular.
  • ExRelaySprinter
    ExRelaySprinter Posts: 874 Member
    Options
    I still can't get over how someone would be able to consider Madonna's stick arms as muscular.
    Just because her arms are skinny, doesn't mean they can't be Muscular too.
    But i guess, everyone perceives muscle differently.
  • stevencloser
    stevencloser Posts: 8,911 Member
    Options
    But they're not muscular, they're just skinny so it's showing.

    Brad-Pitt-in-Fight-Club-001.jpg

    vs.

    big-powerlifter-feb-2013.jpg

    Brad Pitt barely has any muscle compared to whoever the second guy is. What he has is just showing more because he's skinny.
  • ExRelaySprinter
    ExRelaySprinter Posts: 874 Member
    Options
    @stevencloser Brad Pitt looks good though.
    The other Guy,..... not so much. Lol