WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR JUNE 2015

cityjaneLondon

Katla - Ouch on the saddle sores! ! ! ! ! ! :flowerforyou: Isn't it annoying when these crazy things pop up when we're trying to get fit! ! ! ! ! I'm with you on the fizzy water. I LOVE it! I sometimes have it with Angostora Bitters and then it tastes like a "drink"! I don't get this American thing with sweetners and creamers in their coffee. It is a very long time since I met anyone who sweetened their coffee or tea over here. We just have milk in it, mostly semi skimmed. When I was a child everyone had sugar in their tea.

Mia - good going on the 5 minute tidying. The other thing I follow is from the Happiness Project. "If it takes less than a minute do it now". That applies to putting things away, taking stuff upstairs, washing stuff up etc.

Janetr - hake is a fish. Very popular in Spain. I buy the frozen boneless fillets from a "man with a van". 1kg at a time. Nice thawed and baked for about 12 mins in foil. The sorrel I grow in the garden, but it is really a hedge row weed. :laugh: It is vitually indestructible! The young leaves melt in a saucepan and I just season them and stir in a blob of half fat creme fraiche. It has a sour, lemony taste that I love. My meals are often shuzzed up protein with lots of veg or some kind of stew (curry etc) I adore my food. I can eat up to 1800 calories with my exercise regime so I have quite a lot of leeway. What I don't eat is junk food, empty carbohydrates or sweet things. My weakness is cheese and a glass of alcohol. :embarassed: Today I am 11 calories over as it was a yoga day, therefore only 236 cals. :sad:

Love to all. Congrats to all you losers!

Heather UK

terri_mom

My break-up story is nowhere near as traumatic as the ones already shared, but I hope it can give you a little laugh. There is a Country song from about a decade ago by SheDaisy called "Little Good Bye". Here is a short quote of some of the lyrics: " . . . Don't you be surprised to find My little good-byes . . . Left the litter, but I took the cat. Loaded up the TV in the back of my car. Have fun watching the VCR . . . Left the pictures took the frames. Got the umbrella, here comes the rain . . . " When I moved out, he stated that he wanted the house, so when I found out he sent it into foreclosure and his Grandma bought him a smaller one and he had already moved, I had a little moving party of my own while he was at work. I took the bedframe and left the mattress on the floor. I took the dresser and left his clothes on the mattress. I took 2 TV's, the TV stand, and 1 VCR, and left only 1 VCR. I also took the built-in dishwasher (because my Mom and Dad gave it to us as a wedding gift). Now, 2 decades later, I wonder why he had such a problem with it all; I have met his new wife - Steve - and he is very nice. We all get along just fine now.

Back to work. Hugs all around ! ! !

Terri

CalvaryWasForYou

Ladies, thank you for the warm welcome. I love how all in this group seem to be such great friends, despite coming from all over the world. That's truly wonderful! And the support, encouragement, care and concern shown for each other is genuine, which drew me in in the first place.

Been trying to read back through posts this afternoon while having an unusual quiet moment here at work and wanted to wish Lori a Happy Belated Birthday and Renny a Happy Birthday! I hope your special days were fun-filled, glorious days! To everyone, I apologize if I miss something important or someone's special moment. Sometimes, I have just enough time to quickly read a couple pages of posts before I have to get back offline and take of duties around here.

And here's why my life is a crazy, chaotic, overloaded but happy 'mess': I went from being a SAHM to a full-time nanny. I raised my 6 lovely blessings and am now helping to raise the 4 sweetest but, at times, ornery daughters of a federal attorney and her computer programmer husband. The girls are 5, 3, and 1 1/2 year old twins. Mom and dad are climbing the corporate ladders of their jobs, so to speak, while I hold down the fort here at home (I am not a live-in nanny but have my own place about 10 minutes away). But I have to give them props because they are amazing parents who devote themselves fully to their daughters when they are home. I love and adore this family and they refer to me as the 3rd parent and family, although we are not related. I honestly feel like I am coming home to my 2nd home when I come to work in the mornings because they treated like a treasured family member. God has surely blessed me with these truly humble and loving people and I am so grateful for my job. It's fun to be experiencing "parenthood" a second time around with the benefits of being able to go home at the end of the day. lol

Anyway, just thought I would share that so you would know why my schedule is so busy and, at times, scattered. It definitely keeps me hopping! Gotta run! Time to pick the 5 year old up from summer preschool! Wishing you all a fabulous day!

Dana, Central Indiana

pipcd34

miriamwithcats wrote: »

Janet and Pip, so sorry you both went through all of that. It is so awful that someone who claimed to love us does those things. And abuse is a progression. It starts off with little digs, becomes more constant criticism, and then the physical starts with pushing and shoving. Usually. So by that time we are so totally brainwashed in to thinking it is our fault, and we can change ourselves to make things better. I don't know about you, but I gave up everything that made me me. It was so wonderful to get away. For the first year, my boys and I slept on the floor of a tiny apartment I found, in Iowa since he was in Idaho, and we had never been so happy! But I had to move almost all the way across the country to keep him from continued harassment. I am so glad that both of you have found love again.

I do want to be clear, I never got brainwashed into thinking anything was my fault and I didn't change any of my attitude to change so he would hopefully stop because I wasn't doing anything wrong. I never felt it was my fault. I guess my mindset was different in that way

janetr7476

miriamwithcats wrote: »

Janet and Pip, so sorry you both went through all of that. It is so awful that someone who claimed to love us does those things. And abuse is a progression. It starts off with little digs, becomes more constant criticism, and then the physical starts with pushing and shoving. Usually. So by that time we are so totally brainwashed in to thinking it is our fault, and we can change ourselves to make things better. I don't know about you, but I gave up everything that made me me. It was so wonderful to get away. For the first year, my boys and I slept on the floor of a tiny apartment I found, in Iowa since he was in Idaho, and we had never been so happy! But I had to move almost all the way across the country to keep him from continued harassment. I am so glad that both of you have found love again.

Thanks Miriam, unfortunately abusive situations are almost common-place anymore. Its so sad. I actually was pretty much the bread winner in both of the first marriages. All the homes I've ever owned (4) were in my name only. So although I struggled to make ends meet at first, it was not really different than most people live today. It, however, did do an emotional number on me. Thinking I was too fat, ugly, whatever for anyone to love me. The whole nine yards. I went from being happy go lucky, life of the party to much more quiet and unsure of myself. My one sister has told me many times since I've been married to Jack to thank him for her as she thinks this is the happiest she has seen me in my adult life. I guess it comes from being content and knowing I'm loved no matter what. I think that is when I finally realized I wanted to lose weight for ME, not some one else, not some man, some husband. I am determined to keep the weight off that I lost.

janetr7476

Heather wrote - "Janetr hake is a fish. Very popular in Spain. I buy the frozen boneless fillets from a "man with a van". 1kg at a time. Nice thawed and baked for about 12 mins in foil. The sorrel I grow in the garden, but it is really a hedge row weed. It is vitually indestructible! The young leaves melt in a saucepan and I just season them and stir in a blob of half fat creme fraiche. It has a sour, lemony taste that I love. My meals are often shuzzed up protein with lots of veg or some kind of stew (curry etc) I adore my food. I can eat up to 1800 calories with my exercise regime so I have quite a lot of leeway. What I don't eat is junk food, empty carbohydrates or sweet things. My weakness is cheese and a glass of alcohol. Today I am 11 calories over as it was a yoga day, therefore only 236 cals."

Thanks for the info, any day you need a chef job, let me know lol It always sounds (scrumpdillyicious"

Janetr OKC

janetr7476

Terri - Wow

margaretturk

Terri love the T-shirt.

Miriam hoarding is a tough issue for me, too. My brother hoarded in my mom's home. It took eight truck loads to get all his things out of there. It unfortunately contributed to my break with my brother too. He was like an alcoholic in that his stuff meant more to him than we did. He would become verbally abusive or violent if his things were disturbed. Fortunately he realized mom's house had to be sold, and we were able to remove his things without too much trouble. It is sad I do not have anything to do with this brother. I do this because I do not feel safe around him. Some of my friends who have not had to deal with abuse do not understand. My own mother thinks it is sad I don't forgive him. To her and others I have said I forgave him many a time. I choose not to have someone that abusive in my life. His loss, my loss. In my mom's case he was always great to her. Now that she is in the Nursing home, and he can no longer store his stuff he punishes her by rarely visiting her. He has made my other brother into the bad guy. (NOT TRUE) The younger brother and his wife made it possible to sell my mom's house at a good price. The hoarding brother made it difficult. I have known this is his true nature for a long time. It saddens me for my mother. For these reasons hoarding brings up mixed emotions for me.

So even though I am not in an abusive marriage, those of you who are dealing with abusive people in your life I do understand how difficult these people make your life. My thoughts and prayers go out to you.

MNMargaret

cityjaneLondon

Terri - what a great story and very well told! Have you ever thought of being a script writer? ! ! :flowerforyou:

Margaret - abuse comes in so many different forms. We need clear boundaries to know what is acceptable behaviour or not. Well done for drawing the line with your brother. :flowerforyou:

Confession time - I had a piece of cheese after I closed my diary. :embarassed: I went back on and logged it. My DH says he is going to buy a cheese safe. :laugh:

Love you loads. Heather UK

peachstategal

I do not think we are actual hoarders but it certainly is crowded in my house and basement. We have our stuff, DH's mom's and dad's stuff, 3 aunts and a grandmothers stuff, plus the remaining contents of an antique shop along with whatever our son wants us to keep. I see my dining room table once a month when DH does his monthly antique show. I keep asking him what am I to do if he goes before I do. He just laughs. Now I have the job of processing all my mom's clothes and shoes...about 20 or more 30 gal bags full. Makes me feel a little sick inside. She made herself feel better by shopping and many of the clothes still have the tags on them.

I spent all day yesterday going through her costume jewelry. I will probably sell a lot of it on eBay.

I am sorry that so many of you have had to live through traumatic marriages at one time or another. My husband has never hit me but has flew the coop a few times due to what he called my making life intolerable for him. I grew up in a home where my dad was physically abusive to my mother. They got divorced after 37 yrs of marriage and 5 kids. Both remarried other people and then divorced. When he was hospitalized during his last years, she actually sat with him (she was an RN) at night. When he died, she changed her name back to his and will be buried next to him. Ain't life amazing?

Carol/Peach

bwcetc

Allison... Happy Birthday! I wish your lab reports had contained better news. I'll be praying for you. As for your husband's response ... I concur with the others.

Terri ... Absolutely love the idea of going through the store with a tiara! Way to go!

Margaret ... I don't think you meant to be humorous with your post on finding inner peace/place ... But I laughed out loud when you mentioned it wasn't appropriate when driving ... I would think not!

janetr7476

I too need to clarify here, my ex never hit, shoved or in any way physically hurt me. The reason I made him move out was I had learned of him cheating on me for the second time. The first time our oldest had just turned a year old and I was three months pregnant for the second. I let him talk me into going to counseling with him and trying to work on saving the marriage. I told him, never again. So four years later when he did it again I was through. He got back into drugs and kept begging me to give him another chance, when I refused is when he decided, in a drug infused haze, to end all four of our lives because life was too ugly. It was due to the cheating that I came to feel unlovable, fat, ugly, etc.

pipcd34

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mikesmom1983

Renny...Happy Birthday! Hope you have a wonderful year of health and happiness!

Allison...Happy Birthday! I also wish you a wonderful year! I sincerely hope that things improve dramatically for you in the health and happiness department. I am just speechless over what you DH said to you. I would not normally say this about someone I don't know, but, he is an *kitten*.

Chris in MA

Vickil57

Going to be a HOT one today. I do not like the heat. I just got back from the funeral. They had areal nice service. I am alittle upset with her two children as my friend walked in by herself and out by herself. She was really upset and they just walked behind her. Thanks for listening. Our work at the firework stand went well and I am glad we are done as it is going to be alot hotter the rest of the week.
weigh in this morning was good, down .9. I will take it.

Grits--Sending HUGS!!

Nancy--Good for you.

Jane--Good news about your mom.

Allison--Happy Birthday, My doctor told me not to read the internet about my lab results, that when I came in we would go over them. So please don't panic yet. DH seem his mouth works faster then his brain. Makes me wounder if he has any idea how he sounds. HUGS

Katla--Hugs to your friend who lost her husband. Things can change in the blink of an eye.

Time to get something done before I go home. I am really tired tonight so think it will be an early evening. But then everytime I think that when I leave work I get a second wind. Enjoy the rest of the day and remember we are not in this alone.
Blessings, Vicki GI NE

mikesmom1983

Just a quick note before I have to bounce.
Back from the monthly visit to my mother and best friend. It went very well with my mother this time and that made us both happy. Trying to arrange to bring my step-grandaughter (Trinity) down with me next time, she and my mother really hit it off and it think it would be nice for both of them. Trinity and I would then go to BFF's house at the beach for the remainder of the weekend. She loves the beach as much as I do.
Unfortunately I gained about 3 1/2 lbs. from the weekend. I hae concluded that most of the weight was put on while driving...too many healthy snacks are not good. I will have to plan better next time, maybe a substantial sandwich. Back to the program today and hopefully I will have lost a fraction by Saturday.
If you can throw a prayer my way it would be greatly appreciated. I will fill you in as to what is going on late next week.
Chris in MA
PS I live close enough to Alison that I can throw that frying pan at him!

terri_mom

Janetr - I get that. I caught my husband during the conversation leading up to the trist, and it is almost a daily internal battle for me, even though I KNOW I was under no circumstances to blame for any of his behavior. I also know that since it was a Facebook chat, "she" was probably catfishing him, but that doesn't make it less hurtful. Current DH knows the history of ex-H (we lived in a small town in Southeast Minnesota, so almost everyone knew almost everything, and "I'm not easy to forget"). Hugs and Hugs for everyone regardless of struggles. We are in this together, and it just doesn't matter how we got here - "I got your back" ! ! !

Beth - I have also been known to wear a tiara to baseball games, basketball tournaments, bowling alley; wherever I need to go. I have also stopped in front of a closed door that they both walked through and didn't bother to hold open. I just stand there . . . waiting . . . regardless of the weather.

Heather - Not a writer. Just love to tell stories, and the funnier the better. "He11 knows no fury like a woman scorned", and I can have fury with the best of them, just in a sickeningly sweet manner, that no one sees coming. When ex found out what I did, I said "you know the golden rule? Well my golden rule is 'she who has the gold makes the rules', so we will now do this MY way". If I could be onstage every day, I would. And I would wear my tiara with pride, too, right on stage.

Now, my clinic has been closed for almost 15 minutes, and I still need to do the day-end. DH called and asked me to stop at Papa John's for pizza, I said no and hung up. I will text him soon that I am staying late here to work-out, then I will make a big yummy salad when I get home. He does not try to sabotage me; he just doesn't get it. It's okay, this is my battle, and if he doesn't like it, he can do his own thing.

Later Lovelies ! ! !

Terri in Milwaukee

grandmallie

evening ladies~
thank you for all the birthday wishes ~ love you all , had a long long day at work.. very tiring...we take turns making cakes for each other's Birthday ,so everyone at work sang me Happy Birthday.. and we had spice cake, I had a very small sliver...
DB and SIL gave me a card with money... and my dad just called me now.. but of course I didnt hear from either of my children~ Oh well..
did send the bloodwork to my DSIL and she had the lead lab manager read it, not end stage renal, YET, but the nephrologist will im sure be sending me to a endocrinologist.
got my cover the mini, and will take it to N.H. with me.. and have my DSIL help me navigate it lol...
I sooooo look forward to getting some much needed relaxation.. and seeing my cousins together in the first time in about 43 years..
DH is trying to suck up royally,, but I am just sort of just trucking along....
will check in in the a.m,
thanks for all the love!11 right back atcha

pipcd34

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SSC1958

I'm going to take a leaf from Pip's book and mark my spot. Just back in town so have unpacking etc to do. I'll catch up with you tomorrow. Hopefully

Have a wonderful evening friends...
Carey-Edmonton

bwcetc

Terri ... You rock! I think my guys are in for a surprise!

italy10548

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janetr7476

Terri, you made me teary. It DOES help to know others understand. I have 5 older sisters all been married from 47 to over 52 years. Then there is me. Always has made me feel lesser some how. Best of all is knowing you " got our backs". Big hug

nccarolb

Whew! I have been reading for (literally) hours to get caught up.

Beth (?) - So glad I am not the only one who reads Pom as Porn!

I am doing well. The pain has been manageable. I'm so glad they're not stingy with the pain meds nowadays. For those of you who might be curious, they put a little catheter in my neck with a nerve blocker that took away a LOT of the pain. It was hooked up to a little ball that they called my "pain ball" which came with a little purse like pouch that I wore like a cross-body bag. When the ball was completely deflated, we pulled out the catheter! I also came out if surgery with a "cooler" that keeps my shoulder iced non-stop. One simply keeps the unit full of ice and water and the cold water is piped continuously around my shoulder. Awesome!! I have oxycodone, neurontin, morphine, aspirin, anti-nausea, and the all important stool softener. My biggest pain issue has been my butt and back hurting from this crappy recliner! I've had a shower--and didn't die. I've enjoyed sitting outside on my patio on the mornings--something I don't get to do when I'm working. Oh! Before I forget, we mustn't forget the little things that make us happy...When I took off the sling this morning to do a little no-resistance stretching, I was overjoyed to be able to scratch all of that wrinkly, flappy skin on my upper arm. Didn't realize how miserable I was until the scratching commenced!

My daughter has been taking pretty good care of me. She really doesn't like the every four hour schedule for meds! LOL I'm actually coherent enough to take my meds by myself now, but I can't refill my cooler. So sad. NOT! She has been amazed at the amount of food she can eat when she follows my instructions for cooking. Duh!

Off for another trip to the bathroom and a short walk through the house before I get a dose of meds at 8 which begins bedtime for me.

Thanks to all of you for your concern and support!

Carol in NC

mollywhippet

Hi everyone! We got the estimate for the damage to the van, and it's a little less than $8,000. Not even close to totaled. It's amazing how much it costs to do that stuff. They have decided that the wheel is damaged, bent in slightly at the top, so it's not driveable. They have to replace the quarter panel and the whole door and part of the axle/wheel thingy, and do some repair the floor of the passenger compartment (it's bent) and the track that the door rides on. Of course, they can't get started on it till we get the ok from the other lady's insurance. We have not heard from them yet. We got the police report this morning and they said it was the other drivers fault but they didn't issue a citation. No idea why. She was speeding and ran a red light, according to the report.

All these stories about abusive husbands hit close to home for me. There were guns, fists, and everything else he could find to hurt me, but the worst part were the words. Unlike Pip, I did believe when he told me I was worthless, but of course, I went into the marriage believing that anyway. I'm so glad those days are over.

I've been having sharp pains in my tummy most of the day. If I'm sitting still it's not bad, but when I stand up it starts. I'm having flashbacks to my colon blockages and am hoping it's not that again. Of course, it's probably not, but I do worry.

Time to go walk the dogs. Talk to you later.

Sylvia

margaretturk

Carol sending healing thoughts.

Beth I got a good laugh to your comment about the making sure you're not driving when going to your healing place. I only mentioned it because so often on meditation tapes they will say that too. I have this sudden urge to say Ohmmmm!!!!LOL

MNMargaret

Annr

all you ladies said it was hard to eat just one slice of pizza like I did...really easy when you cut it up all frozen and stick the pieces into zip-lock baggies. I just cooked the one piece in the oven in the HUGE pizza pan...it looked really lonely in da middle though.... Low-fat thin pizzas are sucky with the cheese, or is it even cheese. It doesn't melt really good, and NORMALLY I put on extra cheese, etc...but then what is the point of eating a low fat pizza? :-)

Today I did fairly good with the swimming... question though: I have a friend on here that swam 45 mins swimming freestyle, fast, vigorously, and she burned 1,000 something calories. When I put in the time of 45 mins I get 830 something. How does that happen?

Husband and I went to a food bank today, and I got a nice 5 seed bread, and some salmon patties. I have never cooked salmon patties so it should be interesting. The Oregon State Department of Fish and Wildlife donated the salmon so that is cool right? One burger is only 150 calories, 4g fat, 92mg sodium, and 29 protein. Is that a great protein or what? I also rec'd a bag of Smartfood white cheddar popcorn, which I have already inhaled. That was my dinner....aaaack... The whole bloomin bag was 380 calories!!!! Drinking water all afternoon because I scarfed it down at 2pm. If I had snacky foods in the house all the time, I wouldn't freak like this. I haven't had a candybar in about a year, so any chocolate in the house, (like the mega-chocolate chips) I have to mentally have a chat with my "evil self" all the time. Like snacks are my enemy and I have to constantly keep track of their existence so I can stay clear. Crazy me.

Made myself feel better by lying in the sun for 45 minutes. And no I was not a nudist. I had my bra and panties on...hahahahaha! They were my best pair, so they LOOKED swim suitish. Thank goodness for the lattice work on the balcony right? I suppose if one were to stand and stare they could see me, but that would put them smack in the middle of the road. Plus I am on the second story, so they would have to be staring outta their sunroofs when they were driving. See I plan all senarios out. Except when bees come by, then I scream like a banshie and dash inside. As a child I remember going outside and screaming every couple of minutes during the summer, then I would dash back in the house. What a mental headcase eh? I have gotten better. I don't unload a whole can of frabreaze onto a spider like I used to (last year). I know, I know, they make bug spray, but it smells awful. You can kill things with "the scent of linen"...hahahaha!

Hoping tomorrow will be a good weigh-in at TOPS.
Your crazy one from Oregon.... Becca

janetr7476

@Carol - so glad you are home and doing well. Positive vibes for your quick recovery.

Janetr OKC

janetr7476

@Becca - The amount of calories burned for any exercise is based on your personal BMI, so as you lose weight, the number of calories burned for the same type/time of exercise will decrease. It does not take as much exertion to move a lighter object.

loralou1571

So I've hit a platow! Haven't lost any weight in the last 2 weeks. My water consumption is to blame. I try to drink plenty of the stuff however I work in a Dr's office and don't have the time to drink the water I need to loose and go to the bathroom while seeing patients. So frustrated. So much water to drink so little bathroom time! Ugh!