How to approach a girl at the gym?

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Replies

  • MsJulesRenee
    MsJulesRenee Posts: 1,180 Member
    jaga13 wrote: »
    Have you tried smiling at her during the workout? Does she smile back, or immediately look elsewhere? If she smiles back, approach her when she's done. If it's clear that she's trying to avoid you, well, you have your answer.

    Yes, this! If she doesn't look back and smile don't bother. She either has a boyfriend/husband or just not interested. If she does smile, catch her next time before she's all sweaty and stinky. Good luck! B)
  • Kira_72
    Kira_72 Posts: 11 Member
    no.

    don't.

    no. no. no.

    Agreed!
  • BenniBlanc0
    BenniBlanc0 Posts: 1,117 Member
    Don't - just let her train, respect her space, (gym is sacred 'me' time for most people) - if she's interested she'll let you know.
  • shrinkingletters
    shrinkingletters Posts: 1,008 Member
    Don't - just let her train, respect her space, (gym is sacred 'me' time for most people) - if she's interested she'll let you know.

    <3

    Listen to this guy.
  • rjmudlax13
    rjmudlax13 Posts: 900 Member
    edited August 2015
    Of course you shouldn't interrupt her mid set or even in between sets. However, if she happens to take a break or maybe she goes to get a drink or shake or whatever, just go over, introduce yourself and strike up a conversation. Maybe something like "hey my name is X... you got a good workout routine going... are you new to this gym?" There is no rule of the universe that you are breaking by talking to a woman at a gym. Seems pretty normal to me.
  • BasicGreatGuy
    BasicGreatGuy Posts: 857 Member
    edited August 2015
    Do not interrupt her workout.

    Write a short friendly note letting her know that you have noticed her and think she has been doing a great job with her workouts etc. Attach a single yellow rose (yellow is for friendship) to it, and place it on her windshield. Signed, shy guy. This way, there is no pressure on her. She is free to do what she feels comfortable with, without you confronting her in an awkward situation during workout, or she coming to you and saying thanks but no thanks. One way or another, you will get your answer. And even if you don't get the answer you hoped for, hopefully, she will respect and be flattered that you made a classy move that left her in control and comfortable.
  • rjmudlax13
    rjmudlax13 Posts: 900 Member
    jaga13 wrote: »
    I've been married for over 10 years, so I've been out of the game for a long time. But I think it's hard for people to meet, and there shouldn't be too many rules about where you can talk to a girl. You never know. If you do approach her, keep it simple...introduce yourself. If you can see she's receptive, great. If she's hustling to get out of there, she's not interested.

    OMG common sense! Agree. I hate all these "rules". "Well, if she is tilting her head 39.6 degrees to the left and is wearing a teal shirt with off black shorts and it's a Tuesday DO NOT APPROACH." It's not rocket science. If you are not being overly creepy or rude what is the big deal?
  • Hornsby
    Hornsby Posts: 10,322 Member
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.
  • Hea1thyGam3r
    Hea1thyGam3r Posts: 1,354 Member
    rjmudlax13 wrote: »
    jaga13 wrote: »
    I've been married for over 10 years, so I've been out of the game for a long time. But I think it's hard for people to meet, and there shouldn't be too many rules about where you can talk to a girl. You never know. If you do approach her, keep it simple...introduce yourself. If you can see she's receptive, great. If she's hustling to get out of there, she's not interested.

    OMG common sense! Agree. I hate all these "rules". "Well, if she is tilting her head 39.6 degrees to the left and is wearing a teal shirt with off black shorts and it's a Tuesday DO NOT APPROACH." It's not rocket science. If you are not being overly creepy or rude what is the big deal?

    There isn't a big deal, unless you consider the fact that we live in a society where if you approach the wrong person and they are having a bad day, or feel it is inappropriate (even if it isn't) they can snap a clandestine photo and eviscerate you on social media to the acclaim of all the misguided blind keyboard warriors who take their idols at face value every time.
  • BasicGreatGuy
    BasicGreatGuy Posts: 857 Member
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    Not everyone is about acting as you would in a given situation.
  • shrinkingletters
    shrinkingletters Posts: 1,008 Member
    rjmudlax13 wrote: »
    jaga13 wrote: »
    I've been married for over 10 years, so I've been out of the game for a long time. But I think it's hard for people to meet, and there shouldn't be too many rules about where you can talk to a girl. You never know. If you do approach her, keep it simple...introduce yourself. If you can see she's receptive, great. If she's hustling to get out of there, she's not interested.

    OMG common sense! Agree. I hate all these "rules". "Well, if she is tilting her head 39.6 degrees to the left and is wearing a teal shirt with off black shorts and it's a Tuesday DO NOT APPROACH." It's not rocket science. If you are not being overly creepy or rude what is the big deal?

    There isn't a big deal, unless you consider the fact that we live in a society where if you approach the wrong person and they are having a bad day, or feel it is inappropriate (even if it isn't) they can snap a clandestine photo and eviscerate you on social media to the acclaim of all the misguided blind keyboard warriors who take their idols at face value every time.

    Sorry you got turned down that one time.
  • Hornsby
    Hornsby Posts: 10,322 Member
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    Not everyone is about acting as you would in a given situation.

    You are right, I can't think of any situation where I would be upset for someone being friendly to me...
  • TSith
    TSith Posts: 244 Member
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    You also have to understand it from a woman's point of view. The majority of the guys at my gym prey on girls. I wear a baggy cut off and usually sweat pants to the gym and they still look at me like a piece of meat. It's disgusting. It's very rare to have a genuine guy come up to you at the gym. So from experience, no please don't come up to me. Show me you're interested in another way than interrupting me. If you want to get to k ow me and you think I'm worth the wait, then wait until I'm finished. That's all.

    I'm not saying the above is true for ALL guys..
  • melmelw03
    melmelw03 Posts: 5,332 Member
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    If I'm hot and sweaty and looking rough, maybe I don't want hot guy in my space? Come talk after my shower and I don't look like a troll. :blush:
  • Hea1thyGam3r
    Hea1thyGam3r Posts: 1,354 Member
    rjmudlax13 wrote: »
    jaga13 wrote: »
    I've been married for over 10 years, so I've been out of the game for a long time. But I think it's hard for people to meet, and there shouldn't be too many rules about where you can talk to a girl. You never know. If you do approach her, keep it simple...introduce yourself. If you can see she's receptive, great. If she's hustling to get out of there, she's not interested.

    OMG common sense! Agree. I hate all these "rules". "Well, if she is tilting her head 39.6 degrees to the left and is wearing a teal shirt with off black shorts and it's a Tuesday DO NOT APPROACH." It's not rocket science. If you are not being overly creepy or rude what is the big deal?

    There isn't a big deal, unless you consider the fact that we live in a society where if you approach the wrong person and they are having a bad day, or feel it is inappropriate (even if it isn't) they can snap a clandestine photo and eviscerate you on social media to the acclaim of all the misguided blind keyboard warriors who take their idols at face value every time.

    Sorry you got turned down that one time.

    Nice way to judge when you know absolutely nothing about me. :drinker:
  • shrinkingletters
    shrinkingletters Posts: 1,008 Member
    TSith wrote: »
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    You also have to understand it from a woman's point of view. The majority of the guys at my gym prey on girls. I wear a baggy cut off and usually sweat pants to the gym and they still look at me like a piece of meat. It's disgusting. It's very rare to have a genuine guy come up to you at the gym. So from experience, no please don't come up to me. Show me you're interested in another way than interrupting me. If you want to get to k ow me and you think I'm worth the wait, then wait until I'm finished. That's all.

    I'm not saying the above is true for ALL guys..

    It's also always assumed that it's always friendly, or only once in a great while.
  • Hornsby
    Hornsby Posts: 10,322 Member
    TSith wrote: »
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    You also have to understand it from a woman's point of view. The majority of the guys at my gym prey on girls. I wear a baggy cut off and usually sweat pants to the gym and they still look at me like a piece of meat. It's disgusting. It's very rare to have a genuine guy come up to you at the gym. So from experience, no please don't come up to me. Show me you're interested in another way than interrupting me. If you want to get to k ow me and you think I'm worth the wait, then wait until I'm finished. That's all.

    I'm not saying the above is true for ALL guys..

    Meh, that's a cop out excuse to me. Guys get gawked at as well. Guys get looked at like a piece of meat. Wouldn't keep me from being friendly to someone who approaches me. I don't judge people based on what others do. Sorry.
  • Hornsby
    Hornsby Posts: 10,322 Member
    melmelw03 wrote: »
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    If I'm hot and sweaty and looking rough, maybe I don't want hot guy in my space? Come talk after my shower and I don't look like a troll. :blush:

    Yes, but if said guy is interested in you when you look like a troll...doesn't that say something about his genuineness?
  • BasicGreatGuy
    BasicGreatGuy Posts: 857 Member
    Hornsby wrote: »
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    Not everyone is about acting as you would in a given situation.

    You are right, I can't think of any situation where I would be upset for someone being friendly to me...

    When we are talking about strangers with unknown backgrounds in a public setting that is for working out and not match making, I think it best to respect the idea, that not everyone is open and forthright as you and many others are in the same or similar setting, especially where ladies are involved.

  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    How to approach a girl at the gym?

    Usually very low and quietly from the back. Easier to get the cloth over her mouth.

  • shrinkingletters
    shrinkingletters Posts: 1,008 Member
    Hornsby wrote: »
    TSith wrote: »
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    You also have to understand it from a woman's point of view. The majority of the guys at my gym prey on girls. I wear a baggy cut off and usually sweat pants to the gym and they still look at me like a piece of meat. It's disgusting. It's very rare to have a genuine guy come up to you at the gym. So from experience, no please don't come up to me. Show me you're interested in another way than interrupting me. If you want to get to k ow me and you think I'm worth the wait, then wait until I'm finished. That's all.

    I'm not saying the above is true for ALL guys..

    Meh, that's a cop out excuse to me. Guys get gawked at as well. Guys get looked at like a piece of meat. Wouldn't keep me from being friendly to someone who approaches me. I don't judge people based on what others do. Sorry.

    Well then if you prefer people feel entitled to your time and attention at any given moment of their choosing with complete disregard for your space and level of comfort on the off-chance that they're being genuinely friendly to you, then carry on. That's your prerogative, not anyone else's.
  • jaga13
    jaga13 Posts: 1,149 Member
    Hornsby wrote: »
    melmelw03 wrote: »
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    If I'm hot and sweaty and looking rough, maybe I don't want hot guy in my space? Come talk after my shower and I don't look like a troll. :blush:

    Yes, but if said guy is interested in you when you look like a troll...doesn't that say something about his genuineness?

    Right?!! If a hot guy came up to me (when I was young and single) and was actually interested in my sweaty, messy self, I'd feel flattered.

    Any way, what's the worst that can happen? If she's into him, she'll be happy he talked to her (again, after the workout). If she's not interested, no harm.
  • Hornsby
    Hornsby Posts: 10,322 Member
    Hornsby wrote: »
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    Not everyone is about acting as you would in a given situation.

    You are right, I can't think of any situation where I would be upset for someone being friendly to me...

    When we are talking about strangers with unknown backgrounds in a public setting that is for working out and not match making, I think it best to respect the idea, that not everyone is open and forthright as you and many others are in the same or similar setting, especially where ladies are involved.

    Again, I can't think of a single place where I would be "pissed" if someone was just being friendly. If the person didn't want to reciprocate said "friendliness" then I get being pissed, but we are talking about the guy just approaching her and saying hi and people are saying they would be pissed? That's what I don't get.
  • Hornsby
    Hornsby Posts: 10,322 Member
    Hornsby wrote: »
    TSith wrote: »
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    You also have to understand it from a woman's point of view. The majority of the guys at my gym prey on girls. I wear a baggy cut off and usually sweat pants to the gym and they still look at me like a piece of meat. It's disgusting. It's very rare to have a genuine guy come up to you at the gym. So from experience, no please don't come up to me. Show me you're interested in another way than interrupting me. If you want to get to k ow me and you think I'm worth the wait, then wait until I'm finished. That's all.

    I'm not saying the above is true for ALL guys..

    Meh, that's a cop out excuse to me. Guys get gawked at as well. Guys get looked at like a piece of meat. Wouldn't keep me from being friendly to someone who approaches me. I don't judge people based on what others do. Sorry.

    Well then if you prefer people feel entitled to your time and attention at any given moment of their choosing with complete disregard for your space and level of comfort on the off-chance that they're being genuinely friendly to you, then carry on. That's your prerogative, not anyone else's.

    Would you get pissed if someone interrupted your rest time to ask you for help with their form? or a spot?
  • BasicGreatGuy
    BasicGreatGuy Posts: 857 Member
    Chaelaz wrote: »
    How to approach a girl at the gym?

    Usually very low and quietly from the back. Easier to get the cloth over her mouth.
    Not even remotely funny.

    Very tacky and in poor taste, in my opinion.
  • shrinkingletters
    shrinkingletters Posts: 1,008 Member
    Hornsby wrote: »
    Hornsby wrote: »
    TSith wrote: »
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    You also have to understand it from a woman's point of view. The majority of the guys at my gym prey on girls. I wear a baggy cut off and usually sweat pants to the gym and they still look at me like a piece of meat. It's disgusting. It's very rare to have a genuine guy come up to you at the gym. So from experience, no please don't come up to me. Show me you're interested in another way than interrupting me. If you want to get to k ow me and you think I'm worth the wait, then wait until I'm finished. That's all.

    I'm not saying the above is true for ALL guys..

    Meh, that's a cop out excuse to me. Guys get gawked at as well. Guys get looked at like a piece of meat. Wouldn't keep me from being friendly to someone who approaches me. I don't judge people based on what others do. Sorry.

    Well then if you prefer people feel entitled to your time and attention at any given moment of their choosing with complete disregard for your space and level of comfort on the off-chance that they're being genuinely friendly to you, then carry on. That's your prerogative, not anyone else's.

    Would you get pissed if someone interrupted your rest time to ask you for help with their form? or a spot?

    We're not talking about that though, are we? We're talking about the OP's desire to ask a girl out.
  • TSith
    TSith Posts: 244 Member
    Hornsby wrote: »
    TSith wrote: »
    Hornsby wrote: »
    I can't believe how many people would be upset if someone came and talked to them at the gym... Makes me sad.

    You also have to understand it from a woman's point of view. The majority of the guys at my gym prey on girls. I wear a baggy cut off and usually sweat pants to the gym and they still look at me like a piece of meat. It's disgusting. It's very rare to have a genuine guy come up to you at the gym. So from experience, no please don't come up to me. Show me you're interested in another way than interrupting me. If you want to get to k ow me and you think I'm worth the wait, then wait until I'm finished. That's all.

    I'm not saying the above is true for ALL guys..

    Meh, that's a cop out excuse to me. Guys get gawked at as well. Guys get looked at like a piece of meat. Wouldn't keep me from being friendly to someone who approaches me. I don't judge people based on what others do. Sorry.

    Do you boo, do you. Lol I think the consensus of this conversation is some girls like it, some girls don't. So if you go up to a girl in the gym...

    May the odds be evahh in yo favahh :)
  • branflakes1980
    branflakes1980 Posts: 2,516 Member
    Chaelaz wrote: »
    How to approach a girl at the gym?

    Usually very low and quietly from the back. Easier to get the cloth over her mouth.
    Not even remotely funny.

    Very tacky and in poor taste, in my opinion.

    See now, I thought that was flipping hilarious!! Different strokes I guess. LOL!!

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  • shrinkingletters
    shrinkingletters Posts: 1,008 Member
    And honestly, I don't need anyone to feel "sad" because I prefer to be in control of my time and space. If it's so off-putting, be friendly elsewhere, there's obviously people that exist that don't mind.