Eating healthy + jealousy?
Replies
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Ageou really spend 15 hours a day with her? I have two young children and a husband who I don't even spend that much time a day with! Perhaps this relationship between the two of you isn't the healthiest and spending time with other people with different body shapes and sizes, as well as eating habits, might help you get a better perspective.
I don't feel jealous of what other people eat anymore. I did used to be jealous of my sisters for being able to eat whatever they wanted and then realised that really they were eating the high calorie foods in smaller portions than I was without thinking about it too much. I'm of the opinion this is what it's like for most seemingly effortless slim people.
Age and experience have taught me that there is no point bothering with this attitude anymore. You can either spend your life being jealous and miserable about all the things you don't have, or be happy knowing all the good things in your life. Just because your friend is thinner than you, this doesn't make her any more valuable a person.0 -
queenliz99 wrote: »@AllOutof_Bubblegum is right, you are not with her 24/7 and she may also have different muscle mass. You do you!!
You've got this!!
I actually am with her about 15 hours a day most days, if not more... so I can pretty much guarantee that's her regular diet. She mostly spends a lot of time in bed and only ever drives places. I refuse to drive anywhere within walking distance, I do most of the house work and I go to the gym 3/4 times a week. I'm also a lot stronger than her so not sure if the whole muscle mass thing is correct here. Guess I'm just an Amazon. xD
I secretly wish Fat on people too !!
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Yes I used to be jealous about things like this. Then I got into my late 40s and saw these women I used to be so jealous of go through the sad and inevitable things that randomly and unluckily happen as life goes along.
Some got widowed, some got breast cancer, some lost their only child to an early death, one hit her head on a brick staircase after slipping while shoveling snow and ended up in a padded wheelchair with irreversible brain damage.
I'm not attributing any of these things to eating crisps and chocolate. I'm just saying life gets more and more real as you get older. You get more selective about the things you choose to be jealous about. Who has thinner thighs while enjoying heaps of spaghetti and meatballs is put in its proper perspective. It doesn't matter much.
Very well said. Life struggles happen to all of us and attitude is how we deal with it.
Life is 10% of what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it.0 -
I have been there, and have also tried to will myself into thinking I can eat anything and have a slender figure. After trying a few times, I just had to accept the fact that my metabolism is different than some. Actually, to put it into perspective, HER metabolism is different than most. Here are some fast facts to prove it:
Fast Facts
Data from the National Health and Nutrition Examination Survey, 2009–2010 2, 3
More than 2 in 3 adults are considered to be overweight or obese.
More than 1 in 3 adults are considered to be obese.
More than 1 in 20 adults are considered to have extreme obesity.
About one-third of children and adolescents ages 6 to 19 are considered to be overweight or obese.
More than 1 in 6 children and adolescents ages 6 to 19 are considered to be obese.
http://www.niddk.nih.gov/health-information/health-statistics/Pages/overweight-obesity-statistics.aspx
So while MOST of us have to be mindful of what we are eating, those with special genes may eat anything thing want. Most likely that will cause other health problems, but like many have said on here...it shouldn't affect your health goals. Everyone is different in some fashion. Just do what YOUR body needs. And like someone else on here said, you can rev up your metabolism by doing more exercise, most notably, weights. There was a post by someone on MFP with photos to show the difference between losing weight/maintaining her figure through running, and another period through lifting weights. The most notable difference in your abdominal area was through lifting weights. And she was able to eat a little more as well. I noticed for me, when I do core exercises and some weights, my stomach gets flatter and I don't eat as much. I do this along with running 3 or 4 times a week.
Life is not fair. We just have to be thankful for what we DO have! :-)0 -
Well I used to be 92lbs and ate junk all the time. Then I got sick and fat. Just because someone is skinny doesnt mean theyre healthy. So try not to be jealous... You never know if one day she'll get fat, or one day have something even worse happen to her. As a friend, you should be happy that she doesnt have to struggle with weight, honestly. Be happy for your body and focus on you. 0
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InvisibleVeganUnicorn wrote: »she probably spits it out. I do that, I just discovered it helped me break my plateu.
This sounds unhealthy.0 -
You would be an unusual person if you didn't always know someone who had one or even two traits that you envied...richer, prettier, stronger, more popular, smarter, whatever. Getting over it early is good for your long-term mental health. You be you, and focus on building yourself up, on your own little victories and improvements. Compare yourself to the person you were yesterday, not to who anyone else is today.0
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Mercsgirl1 wrote: »queenliz99 wrote: »@AllOutof_Bubblegum is right, you are not with her 24/7 and she may also have different muscle mass. You do you!!
You've got this!!
I actually am with her about 15 hours a day most days, if not more... so I can pretty much guarantee that's her regular diet. She mostly spends a lot of time in bed and only ever drives places. I refuse to drive anywhere within walking distance, I do most of the house work and I go to the gym 3/4 times a week. I'm also a lot stronger than her so not sure if the whole muscle mass thing is correct here. Guess I'm just an Amazon. xD
I secretly wish Fat on people too !!
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Okay, I've tried to ignore it... but secretly, jealousy is taking over my weight loss journey. I've tried to blame it on metabolism and a range of other biological factors, but I'm just starting to get so annoyed I need to see if other people have experienced this.
My house mate has the worst diet I think I've ever encountered. Yesterday, I paid attention to what she ate. It was a pretty typical day. She had tuna pasta bake loaded with butter and cheese for breakfast, followed by nachos with the works, a bowl of cereal, a bag of pistachios, soft drink, more pasta and then went out to get KFC chips at about 3am. She weighs 55kg-ish and is the same height as me (163cm-ish).
I know i shouldn't care what others eat... but it's pretty annoying when I basically live off salad, low carb veg, tiny portions of poached lean protein and black coffee. I weigh EVERYTHING but I am and always will be, bigger than her... even though I'm not overweight anymore, I just have to work so much harder to stay a weight that I'm happy with. It makes me so jealous that I've actively fantasized about her getting fat one day. Bad, I know.
It kind of makes me want to throw in the towel altogether.
Anyone else experienced this?
Ummmmmm, I'm going to go with no. Envy? Sure. Wishing for something bad to happen to another person when they've not done anything wrong? Nope.
I have never wished for anyone that's thinner than me to be fat.
I have never wished anyone prettier than me to have acid poured on their face.
I have never wished for anyone faster than me to break a leg.
I have never wished for someone in a better financial situation to experience financial ruin.
I have never thought of myself as the nicest person but I guess I'm not as mean is I thought I was. Maybe I am mean but I'm up front about it.0 -
Yes! I posted about my own attempts to starve myself and it does not work. Train your body to increase your metabolism by... wait for it... eating more nutritious foods. You'll gain weight before you lose it. Try not to compare to your house mate. She'll get fat one day!
Hehe thanks for the support
Perhaps I was being a little dramatic... I'm definitely not starving myself... but oh how I wish I could eat that amount of food and not put on weight. I think I'm better to look at it from a health perspective... if one of us is going to get heart disease later in life, it probably won't be me!
That... was not support. It was more like an accessory to a crime.
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Liftng4Lis wrote: »It is what it is
Pretty much this.
Does it stink? Yup.
Is it unfair? Yup again, and its hard not to be a bit envious; that's just human nature but that's the hand you've been dealt.
Try not to wish her fat in spite though, that's just negativity that you have to carry around and while it may not seem to be much of a burden, it is.
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Okay, I've tried to ignore it... but secretly, jealousy is taking over my weight loss journey. I've tried to blame it on metabolism and a range of other biological factors, but I'm just starting to get so annoyed I need to see if other people have experienced this.
My house mate has the worst diet I think I've ever encountered. Yesterday, I paid attention to what she ate. It was a pretty typical day. She had tuna pasta bake loaded with butter and cheese for breakfast, followed by nachos with the works, a bowl of cereal, a bag of pistachios, soft drink, more pasta and then went out to get KFC chips at about 3am. She weighs 55kg-ish and is the same height as me (163cm-ish).
I know i shouldn't care what others eat... but it's pretty annoying when I basically live off salad, low carb veg, tiny portions of poached lean protein and black coffee. I weigh EVERYTHING but I am and always will be, bigger than her... even though I'm not overweight anymore, I just have to work so much harder to stay a weight that I'm happy with. It makes me so jealous that I've actively fantasized about her getting fat one day. Bad, I know.
It kind of makes me want to throw in the towel altogether.
Anyone else experienced this?
Ummmmmm, I'm going to go with no. Envy? Sure. Wishing for something bad to happen to another person when they've not done anything wrong? Nope.
I have never wished for anyone that's thinner than me to be fat.
I have never wished anyone prettier than me to have acid poured on their face.
I have never wished for anyone faster than me to break a leg.
I have never wished for someone in a better financial situation to experience financial ruin.
I have never thought of myself as the nicest person but I guess I'm not as mean is I thought I was. Maybe I am mean but I'm up front about it.Yes! I posted about my own attempts to starve myself and it does not work. Train your body to increase your metabolism by... wait for it... eating more nutritious foods. You'll gain weight before you lose it. Try not to compare to your house mate. She'll get fat one day!
Hehe thanks for the support
Perhaps I was being a little dramatic... I'm definitely not starving myself... but oh how I wish I could eat that amount of food and not put on weight. I think I'm better to look at it from a health perspective... if one of us is going to get heart disease later in life, it probably won't be me!
That... was not support. It was more like an accessory to a crime.
This is awesome!!0 -
queenliz99 wrote: »Okay, I've tried to ignore it... but secretly, jealousy is taking over my weight loss journey. I've tried to blame it on metabolism and a range of other biological factors, but I'm just starting to get so annoyed I need to see if other people have experienced this.
My house mate has the worst diet I think I've ever encountered. Yesterday, I paid attention to what she ate. It was a pretty typical day. She had tuna pasta bake loaded with butter and cheese for breakfast, followed by nachos with the works, a bowl of cereal, a bag of pistachios, soft drink, more pasta and then went out to get KFC chips at about 3am. She weighs 55kg-ish and is the same height as me (163cm-ish).
I know i shouldn't care what others eat... but it's pretty annoying when I basically live off salad, low carb veg, tiny portions of poached lean protein and black coffee. I weigh EVERYTHING but I am and always will be, bigger than her... even though I'm not overweight anymore, I just have to work so much harder to stay a weight that I'm happy with. It makes me so jealous that I've actively fantasized about her getting fat one day. Bad, I know.
It kind of makes me want to throw in the towel altogether.
Anyone else experienced this?
Ummmmmm, I'm going to go with no. Envy? Sure. Wishing for something bad to happen to another person when they've not done anything wrong? Nope.
I have never wished for anyone that's thinner than me to be fat.
I have never wished anyone prettier than me to have acid poured on their face.
I have never wished for anyone faster than me to break a leg.
I have never wished for someone in a better financial situation to experience financial ruin.
I have never thought of myself as the nicest person but I guess I'm not as mean is I thought I was. Maybe I am mean but I'm up front about it.Yes! I posted about my own attempts to starve myself and it does not work. Train your body to increase your metabolism by... wait for it... eating more nutritious foods. You'll gain weight before you lose it. Try not to compare to your house mate. She'll get fat one day!
Hehe thanks for the support
Perhaps I was being a little dramatic... I'm definitely not starving myself... but oh how I wish I could eat that amount of food and not put on weight. I think I'm better to look at it from a health perspective... if one of us is going to get heart disease later in life, it probably won't be me!
That... was not support. It was more like an accessory to a crime.
This is awesome!!
She's not just stunning, she's smart too.0 -
3dogsrunning wrote: »queenliz99 wrote: »Okay, I've tried to ignore it... but secretly, jealousy is taking over my weight loss journey. I've tried to blame it on metabolism and a range of other biological factors, but I'm just starting to get so annoyed I need to see if other people have experienced this.
My house mate has the worst diet I think I've ever encountered. Yesterday, I paid attention to what she ate. It was a pretty typical day. She had tuna pasta bake loaded with butter and cheese for breakfast, followed by nachos with the works, a bowl of cereal, a bag of pistachios, soft drink, more pasta and then went out to get KFC chips at about 3am. She weighs 55kg-ish and is the same height as me (163cm-ish).
I know i shouldn't care what others eat... but it's pretty annoying when I basically live off salad, low carb veg, tiny portions of poached lean protein and black coffee. I weigh EVERYTHING but I am and always will be, bigger than her... even though I'm not overweight anymore, I just have to work so much harder to stay a weight that I'm happy with. It makes me so jealous that I've actively fantasized about her getting fat one day. Bad, I know.
It kind of makes me want to throw in the towel altogether.
Anyone else experienced this?
Ummmmmm, I'm going to go with no. Envy? Sure. Wishing for something bad to happen to another person when they've not done anything wrong? Nope.
I have never wished for anyone that's thinner than me to be fat.
I have never wished anyone prettier than me to have acid poured on their face.
I have never wished for anyone faster than me to break a leg.
I have never wished for someone in a better financial situation to experience financial ruin.
I have never thought of myself as the nicest person but I guess I'm not as mean is I thought I was. Maybe I am mean but I'm up front about it.Yes! I posted about my own attempts to starve myself and it does not work. Train your body to increase your metabolism by... wait for it... eating more nutritious foods. You'll gain weight before you lose it. Try not to compare to your house mate. She'll get fat one day!
Hehe thanks for the support
Perhaps I was being a little dramatic... I'm definitely not starving myself... but oh how I wish I could eat that amount of food and not put on weight. I think I'm better to look at it from a health perspective... if one of us is going to get heart disease later in life, it probably won't be me!
That... was not support. It was more like an accessory to a crime.
This is awesome!!
She's not just stunning, she's smart too.
Why do find it necessary to reduce her to her looks then justify this by adding an after-thought on her capacity to think like a normal, non-catty person?0 -
queenliz99 wrote: »InvisibleVeganUnicorn wrote: »she probably spits it out. I do that, I just discovered it helped me break my plateu.
wut?
^0 -
How old are you? Sounds like college stuff. I promise that eat whatever you want doesn't last forever and she'll be in the weight loss boat with the rest of us.0
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Okay, I've tried to ignore it... but secretly, jealousy is taking over my weight loss journey. I've tried to blame it on metabolism and a range of other biological factors, but I'm just starting to get so annoyed I need to see if other people have experienced this.
My house mate has the worst diet I think I've ever encountered. Yesterday, I paid attention to what she ate. It was a pretty typical day. She had tuna pasta bake loaded with butter and cheese for breakfast, followed by nachos with the works, a bowl of cereal, a bag of pistachios, soft drink, more pasta and then went out to get KFC chips at about 3am. She weighs 55kg-ish and is the same height as me (163cm-ish).
I know i shouldn't care what others eat... but it's pretty annoying when I basically live off salad, low carb veg, tiny portions of poached lean protein and black coffee. I weigh EVERYTHING but I am and always will be, bigger than her... even though I'm not overweight anymore, I just have to work so much harder to stay a weight that I'm happy with. It makes me so jealous that I've actively fantasized about her getting fat one day. Bad, I know.
It kind of makes me want to throw in the towel altogether.
Anyone else experienced this?
Ummmmmm, I'm going to go with no. Envy? Sure. Wishing for something bad to happen to another person when they've not done anything wrong? Nope.
I have never wished for anyone that's thinner than me to be fat.
I have never wished anyone prettier than me to have acid poured on their face.
I have never wished for anyone faster than me to break a leg.
I have never wished for someone in a better financial situation to experience financial ruin.
I have never thought of myself as the nicest person but I guess I'm not as mean is I thought I was. Maybe I am mean but I'm up front about it.
0 -
Okay, I've tried to ignore it... but secretly, jealousy is taking over my weight loss journey. I've tried to blame it on metabolism and a range of other biological factors, but I'm just starting to get so annoyed I need to see if other people have experienced this.
My house mate has the worst diet I think I've ever encountered. Yesterday, I paid attention to what she ate. It was a pretty typical day. She had tuna pasta bake loaded with butter and cheese for breakfast, followed by nachos with the works, a bowl of cereal, a bag of pistachios, soft drink, more pasta and then went out to get KFC chips at about 3am. She weighs 55kg-ish and is the same height as me (163cm-ish).
I know i shouldn't care what others eat... but it's pretty annoying when I basically live off salad, low carb veg, tiny portions of poached lean protein and black coffee. I weigh EVERYTHING but I am and always will be, bigger than her... even though I'm not overweight anymore, I just have to work so much harder to stay a weight that I'm happy with. It makes me so jealous that I've actively fantasized about her getting fat one day. Bad, I know.
It kind of makes me want to throw in the towel altogether.
Anyone else experienced this?
Besides the fact that you should stop worrying about your housemate because her habits, her weight, etc have absolutely nothing to do with you...
Some of your comments about what you're eating and your exercise makes me wonder if maybe you may be over restricting? You said you aren't overweight, but even if you are trying to lose, it shouldn't be necessary to only eat salad, low carb veg, tiny portions of protein and black coffee... How many cals are you set at? Are you losing? Maintaining?
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