Why do people on Myfitnesspal ask for motivation and support?

lisadobbscarr

At first when I read Anthony's post, I had the same reaction as some of you, but then I thought... what's the big deal? It's a simple, honest question. He's not being pretentious or anything. Alot of you have been quite polite and forthcoming with your answers, yet some of you have been terribly negative, rude, and defensive. It was an honest question. In all of his responses, he seems genuinely interested, curious, and actually quite polite considering how rude some of you have been. I do appreciate some motivation and support myself, but I see nothing wrong with his question. Check yourselves and deal with your own issues.

rabblescum

I don't understand how someone who is only a part of the community for the calorie data base ends up in the community forms in the first place. Also confused on how someone so self motivated ends up in the thread dedicated to motivation and support. lt is like someone asking what is up with all these dog owners when cat people are better in the forum of dogowners.com.

dream4tc

People are all different. Sometimes they need accountability to someone else to stay focused, not everyone is self driven. Like minded people with the same goals need to know they aren't alone in their struggles and need to feel a part of something. For me, I do better with others doing the same thing. It brings out some competitiveness in me and helps push me to finish because I don't want to disappoint others who are depending on me.

eldamiano

Its probably out of boredom....

shadowfax_c11

Come back to this when you are 40. I think by then you will understand.

Seriously people. The guy is only 20. If he has been very lucky he has never had his self esteem wrecked, has never really felt what it is to fail, sometimes repeatedly. He does not know what depression feels like, has not spent years working long hours at a desk and coming home to chores and children. He has never been alone in the world or had family or friends that tried to undermine his efforts. He lacks life experience and so it isn't that surprising that he does not understand.

Try not to let his lack of understanding get to you.

Meanwhile OP. You just need to realise that many people have lived different lives and have different circumstances. Most adults have had that lovely naive optimism knocked out of them. So they need a little help now and then. And that's perfectly okay.

cryptobrit

If the OP is genuinely only 20 then it is possible they really don't understand and it is a genuine question. I like others am usually very self-motivated but have found out achieving weight loss goals horrendous in middle age - it is just not happening for me. This is where support and motivation comes in- when thinking you don't need that encouragement to finding out you do when getting nowhere.

jofjltncb6

lisadobbscarr wrote: »

At first when I read Anthony's post, I had the same reaction as some of you, but then I thought... what's the big deal? It's a simple, honest question. He's not being pretentious or anything. Alot of you have been quite polite and forthcoming with your answers, yet some of you have been terribly negative, rude, and defensive. It was an honest question. In all of his responses, he seems genuinely interested, curious, and actually quite polite considering how rude some of you have been. I do appreciate some motivation and support myself, but I see nothing wrong with his question. Check yourselves and deal with your own issues.

You believe this to be sincere?

Are you aware?

kk_inprogress

lstrat115 wrote: »

Maybe some people just enjoy the support and community and don't feel the need to go about it all on their own. I think a few of us have lived a bit longer than you and had a lot of life struggles and sometimes need ideas and tips on how to work around those things.

Come talk to us again in 10+ years. Life throws lots of curve balls and I put all my time into my kids and my job leaving little time for ME. At 20, generally, all you have to think about is you. Things change as you grow.

Without having friends on MFP, I never would have met you, @lstrat115! Oh, the horror!

irisbuen

No man is an island, and if they are they can only go as far until the ocean washes over them.

That's how I'd put it. People have different needs and have different preferences, self motivation is one thing but if there are factors that could threaten that (I.e. depression, chronic problem) then a support validates the goal and the person. Not that I'm saying that's all there is to it. There's really a power behind a community.

Having support increases self-awareness and a desire to do better. It makes a lot of people motivated because they know that if they stumble, there are people who care and could remind them when they forget.

I hope this answers your question.

Therealobi1

I don't understand why you don't understand
I started to enjoy more when I found the forums and started to add friends
It's nice to be able to talk nonstop about food and fitness
Real life friends are not always interested

SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage

lisadobbscarr wrote: »

At first when I read Anthony's post, I had the same reaction as some of you, but then I thought... what's the big deal? It's a simple, honest question. He's not being pretentious or anything. Alot of you have been quite polite and forthcoming with your answers, yet some of you have been terribly negative, rude, and defensive. It was an honest question. In all of his responses, he seems genuinely interested, curious, and actually quite polite considering how rude some of you have been. I do appreciate some motivation and support myself, but I see nothing wrong with his question. Check yourselves and deal with your own issues.

LOLs. New here?

MommyMeggo

A person who cannot understand the concept of people needing people---- needs more than most.

JollyHodgers87

I can speak from personal experience. I used to use this app and stopped for a while. Anyway, the first time I used it, I didn't have friends on here to support me because I was new to it and very shy about it. This second go around, I have actually seen a support group and I have found it much more helpful.

It's not because I'm unmotivated or anything. But if you can say that every day you have 100% motivation and it you never have days where you feel less self motivated than others, you my friend are either lying to yourself and others or you are much stronger than I!

Somedays are harder than others. It helps when someone comments, "Great burn!" or "Keep it up!" And I feel more self motivated when I motivate others as well.

Why does that offend you. I can think of much more offensive stuff. It will be ok.

JollyHodgers87

anthony150paolucci wrote: »

tanyajensen75 wrote: »

I guess I am curious on why one would join a weight loss community for anything other than accountability and support. I don't need constant motivation verbally, but I look at the success stories, read about others when they mess up and get right back in it and I also enjoy the challenges. It's good to know we are not alone. I don't have support at home, so it's nice to find it here.

The main reason I use this website is to track calories really. It makes me wonder if nobody got any support on here, would they back out of their fitness goal entirely? That seems alarming to me.

I wouldn't. Like I say, I've done this with and without support. But I feel lots of people on here give good advice. Sure I can do it on my own, but it speeds up the process when you have a goal to know what your doing when.And while I'm smart, I don't know everything. So it never hurts to talk to people. It's not like I form personal relationships with them! Haha it's not like it's Dietersmeet.com. I see nothing but helpfulness from it. But to each their own.

jofjltncb6

Therealobi1 wrote: »

I don't understand why you don't understand
I started to enjoy more when I found the forums and started to add friends
It's nice to be able to talk nonstop about food and fitness
Real life friends are not always interested

I rue the day I discovered the forums and long for that time of innocence the first six months I was here just logging calories.

lithezebra

I wouldn't mind a discussion group for those of us who are doing our own thing, who don't feel that we need support to do it. I get good ideas from other people who have successfully maintained their weight loss, who are not emotionally invested in my goals. In my experience, social support can backfire. People sometimes get mad, or tired of you, if they support you and you fail. They frequently want you to follow their advice. You often have to agree with them, or there's tension. Sometimes people don't really want you to succeed. (These are all reasons that I don't discuss weight loss with my friends, aside from the fact that my weight loss is a boring topic).