married chit-chatters?

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  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    Lonestar5715 wrote: »
    projectsix wrote: »
    Question!

    If all you married folk ever separate/divorce from your spouses do you see yourself getting together w/ someone else or flying solo indefinitely?

    A good question! I am answering only because although I am technically married, that is about to end within the next couple of months.

    I know beyond a doubt that I will enter into another long-term relationship even if it doesn't turn out to be marriage.

    To me life is much more rich and vibrant when shared with another person. As much as I enjoy short periods of solitude I also recognize my need to be significant in someone else's life.

    Definitely agree. I like a little alone time. But, the give and take of a shared relationship isn't difficult for me. I prefer it and find it more enjoyable than being alone. But, I am not saying it's universally better. Not at all. Different people are different and prefer different things. I like this. Maybe because I work so well with my husband. I can sometimes interact with people and can imagine how difficult it would be to be in a partnership with them. Not because there is anything wrong with them. I like them as a friend. I just see how our styles of living wouldn't mesh together well. In dance I also love to do duets.
  • RainaProske
    RainaProske Posts: 636 Member
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    Lonestar5715 wrote: »
    I agree, thanks for sharing Raina!!

    Awww. Thank you.
  • RainaProske
    RainaProske Posts: 636 Member
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    At my age, if I were without my husband, I would likely sell the house and move into a little place for seniors. OR a tiny house where the grounds are kept up by someone else. That way, I would have neighbors to chat with, but my place would be private -- my own.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    RainaProske wrote: »
    At my age, if I were without my husband, I would likely sell the house and move into a little place for seniors. OR a tiny house where the grounds are kept up by someone else. That way, I would have neighbors to chat with, but my place would be private -- my own.

    That's a good plan!
  • Guns_N_Buns
    Guns_N_Buns Posts: 1,899 Member
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    projectsix wrote: »
    Question!

    If all you married folk ever separate/divorce from your spouses do you see yourself getting together w/ someone else or flying solo indefinitely?

    I, too, can't imagine my world without my hubs, but if he were to leave me, I'd focus on myself for awhile; travel, explore, etc. and let my next relationship fall into place (rather than seeking one out). I have told myself that I will never, again, fall in love with someone with children from a previous marriage.
  • DarleneReid577
    DarleneReid577 Posts: 4,401 Member
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    RainaProske wrote: »
    At my age, if I were without my husband, I would likely sell the house and move into a little place for seniors. OR a tiny house where the grounds are kept up by someone else. That way, I would have neighbors to chat with, but my place would be private -- my own.

    I agree 100 % I would never marry again and I would live in a place where someone else does all the yard work, cleaning, cooking.
  • meredithgir199
    meredithgir199 Posts: 243 Member
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    amcalmond768 wrote: »
    Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
    I was looking up the internet for baby names at wife's request and there's an article that says women are actually giving khaleesi as a name. I mean how bizarre is that. I feel sorry for those girls.

    My husband and I had such a hard time agreeing on the names of our girls... I feel like since I was doing most of the work I should get the final say lmao but we were able to come to an agreement both times!

    Picking names is tough. We both went through a baby name book individually and made a list. Then compared to see which ones we had that were common. Surprisingly, only one similarity, which is what we named our daughter.

  • Lonestar5715
    Lonestar5715 Posts: 466 Member
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    lulufit5 wrote: »
    meredithgir199 wrote: »
    amcalmond768 wrote: »
    Cutaway_Collar wrote: »
    I was looking up the internet for baby names at wife's request and there's an article that says women are actually giving khaleesi as a name. I mean how bizarre is that. I feel sorry for those girls.

    My husband and I had such a hard time agreeing on the names of our girls... I feel like since I was doing most of the work I should get the final say lmao but we were able to come to an agreement both times!

    Picking names is tough. We both went through a baby name book individually and made a list. Then compared to see which ones we had that were common. Surprisingly, only one similarity, which is what we named our daughter.

    For our last two babies we had an idea of the names we wanted but we waited until the baby was born and we actually held them and saw them. Which turned out leading to different names than we had planned. Because honestly...the names just came to us.

    I love that you did that with your children. I also admire the tradition of American Indian families who are said to have named their children one name upon birth and later when they were in their mid-teens they would be given their adult name once their mature traits and nature was obvious. Thanks for sharing!
  • Lonestar5715
    Lonestar5715 Posts: 466 Member
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    cross2bear wrote: »
    Lonestar5715 wrote: »
    cross2bear wrote: »
    Married for 37 years. To the same person. Wont ever divorce - too much paperwork and we are both pretty lazy. And frugal (he's cheap!) But its worked out so far - so what the hell - in for another year.

    I am curious @cross2bear do you mind sharing what the most challenging time has been for you in your marriage so far? And please don't say the first 37 years

    The most challenging time, without being my usual sarcastic smart mouth self, was when the kids were small. We had completely different upbringings, and different baggage as a result, so we often clashed about how restrictive or permissive we were going to be with them. My husband is a very traditional "me man, you woman" kind of guy, so I would often have to point out to him that he was being a sexist jerk with our daughter by treating her differently than our son. Fortunately, we both had pretty successful careers, so we are able to bequeath quite a healthy inheritance to the kids for their therapists.

    Thanks for responding @cross2bear. Congrats on not only that many years together but also on navigating the turbulence of raising young children. You're totally right about the differing baggage each spouse brings with them into a marriage and how that cascades into the relationship. I applaud you!
  • 11win1420
    11win1420 Posts: 3 Member
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    LOL I don't think I deserve applause but thanks anyway!
  • RavenLibra
    RavenLibra Posts: 1,737 Member
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    What is in a name? My wife and I decided to not know what was coming in advance of what became our daughter's birth so we picked a somewhat "ambidextrous" name...(No not Pat, Kim, Jan, etc.) and we wanted it to be unique and un-rhyme-able so kids would have to find a different way to make fun of her if that's the way it was going to go down. also something with historical context. I think we succeeded the second name was easier... My grandmother's first... and as we were wheeling into the delivery room... the kid got a second middle name...

    How tough was it to come up with that first name? IN the province we live in she was the ONLY kid boy or girl to be Named Dante that year...in the following years there were more than just a few. but she was and is quite a unique young lady.
  • RavenLibra
    RavenLibra Posts: 1,737 Member
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    ohh...DON_TAY is how we pronounce it :P
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    I have an unusual name. And the spelling is different from the pronunciation. It can be pronounced in two different ways. Mine is pronounced in the lesser expected way. But, that's my name. Would have been easier if my mother had just dropped one double letter from my name. So, for my girls I tried to choose pretty names that are unique, but not incredibly unique either. I spelled them in the way that made sense phonetically or could not be confused with a different word. Where I lived had a very large Spanish speaking population, and my first daughters name sounds the same as a benign Spanish word. We moved since then. My youngest daughters name was unique, but has become more common these days. Both are pretty, feminine names. I gave them flowers for middle names. Did have trouble deciding on a name, so went with one we could agree on.
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    Just thinking about the previous question. I have two kids. They are 12 & 9. I am so happy with them. But, I am all done having kids and won't have any more. So, if somehow I was out on the dating scene again I wouldn't start another family.
  • cuckoo_jenibeth
    cuckoo_jenibeth Posts: 1,434 Member
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    ^^ I agree with this. My son is 20. I would not want to start over again! I have friends my age that still have young children & just hanging out with them for awhile wears me out!
  • gfjazz
    gfjazz Posts: 285 Member
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    Good morning

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